Chapter eight!

Generic Pent: w00t!

The Real Pent has kindly decided to ignore his schedule for today and is currently trying to burn down the Generic Muse Warehouse. He says he's coming back for Generic Pent, but I don't think we have to worry about him.

Generic Pent: (grins at locked, bolted, boarded up, etc. door) w00t!

But, even if we do, I have to write chapter eight in both circumstances. So…yeah.

Paladin2007: yeah, no action sequence :-/ sorry! I'm glad you think it gets more interesting, because I keep getting less ideas XD I don't know if you can get a generic muse now that the Real Pent is blowing up the warehouse, though.
Serra's evil twin: o.o yes, naughty Iris nearly spoiled everything.
Cool-Chan: haha my friends tell me that, too… "-insert real name here-, why do you always have to beat yourself up?" XDDD

Right, so Fire Emblem belongs to Nintendo and Intelligent Systems…as in not me. So…you can draw your own conclusions as to what that means…


Chapter Eight: Step One

"What the—?" Raven cried the next morning, being unable to find his footwear. "Who stole my—boots…" he trailed off, seeing that a pair of boots that looked strangely familiar were standing next to the door. "Oooh, that girl really did steal my boots! Now, whose are these?"

"Something wrong, Raven?" Priscilla said dryly, passing by and checking to see what the problem was.

"She stole my boots!" Raven whined. Priscilla quirked an eyebrow.

"Er…who stole your boots?"

"That girl!"

"…Okay, Raven, maybe you'd better go back to sleep."

"Do you know who these belong to?" Raven inquired, holding up the boots for her to see. "They look like girl boots."

"Well, then maybe she swapped boots with you. If the boots fit, wear them, and quit your whining…"

"…Okay."

"How did I end up with such a crazy brother?" Priscilla, exasperated, asked Erk when she exited her "crazy brother's" tent.

"What happened?"

"Oh, some girl stole his boots, and now he's flipping out…" Erk, after she said this, was trying very hard not to laugh.

"That's…interesting," Erk replied, fighting to keep a straight face.

"Be glad you don't have any siblings, Erk…they're just plain weird. Brothers in particular…all boys are weird."

"Boys are weird, eh?" Erk grinned, having found a reason to. "And why is that?"

"Well, they're very strange people to begin with…a lot of them are under the impression that they're the cutest ones around, and they're not allowed to show emotions or they'll be ridiculed by other boys. They whine when things don't go their way and they suck up to girls…they're just…very…different."

"Really?" Erk smiled, taking her hand in his and holding it to his chest.

"Yes, really," Priscilla replied. "They're a bunch of brats."

"And girls aren't weird?" Erk inquired craftily.

"Not nearly as weird as you boys are," she responded. "See? You're sucking up, just like I said. All boys do that."

"Girls think that nagging is a sport," Erk retorted, slipping his free arm around her waist. "And they're picky, they worry too much about how they look, they change moods at the drop of a hat, and they aren't very nice people in the morning. But you know what?"

"What?"

"I like girls. They make me laugh. But there's this one girl I know that makes me feel better when I'm sad, gives me a reason to wake up every day and go to sleep at night, gives me the strength I need to go on, and makes me laugh. I love that girl very much, and I will for as long as I shall live. Do you know who that girl is?"

"I think I might. You know, I know a boy like that. He's pretty cute."

"Yeah? Well, that girl is the prettiest girl I've ever known."

"Aww…I love you, too, Erk."

"What? I wasn't talking about you."

"Oh, really? Then who were you talking about?"

"Haven't you figured it out by now? That girl is you, Priscilla."

"Yeah, that's what I thought. I was ready to kick your butt for a second, there, little boy...if you were seeing someone else, I'd have to hurt you. Badly."

"You would, wouldn't you?"

"Yes, I certainly would."

"Well, it's a good thing I don't plan on it, then. I can't imagine loving anyone else than that cute little redhead with the green dress and the feather in her hair. Oh, wait," Erk laughed. "That's you, isn't it?"

"Could be…so, you like girls, eh?"

"Yup."

"Too bad…I still think boys are weird."

"That's okay…I think girls are weird, too. But I still like them."

"Probably because you're a boy." Priscilla smiled.

"That could be part of it." seeing a perfect opportunity for a little kiss, they were about to proceed with this when, predictably, someone ruined the moment. Again.

"Hi, Erk," Louise said cheerfully, showing up very randomly on his other side and interrupting this little scene (to the disappointment of Erk and Priscilla, who hadn't had a chance to do anything lately without someone intervening). "What's your real name?"

"What?" Erk said blankly. "Um…you know my real name. It's Erk, remember?"

"Okay, where are you from?"

"Lady Louise, what's going on?" Erk inquired, starting to get a little annoyed.

"So, who's that girl with the purple hair in the black dress? Do you know her? Hmm?"

"Why are you asking me this, again?"

"Because Hector told me to."

"Don't listen to him…he's a loser."

"Okay!" Louise replied, then took off again.

"…Why would Hector want to ask you something as crazy as that?" Priscilla wondered aloud. "And why does he think your real name isn't Erk?"

"Your guess is as good as mine, Priscilla." There was a small silence as Priscilla paused to think.

"…Is there something you should be telling me, Erk?" she asked him at length.

"What? Is this another one of those things you do to try and get into my head?"

"Huh?" Priscilla said blankly (very articulately, of course). "What things?"

"…Nevermind."

"But seriously…are you keeping secrets from me?"

"Uhhh…maybe?" Erk hadn't anticipated this question at all. Did she suspect him, too?

"You know I don't like secrets, Erk."

"Er…I might have one…that I've been…er…keeping from…a lot of…people…"

"…And...?" Priscilla said, gesturing for him to go on when he didn't continue as she expected. "What is it, exactly?"

"Um…I love you."

"Aww…how sweet…except I know that already. What else did you want to tell me?"

"I…um…" Erk searched for words, trying to find a way to avoid the situation he was already in. "Maybe…we should discuss this…elsewhere."

"I don't see anyone around here; I thought it was a pretty good spot. But if you don't feel comfortable, maybe you want to go somewhere where every one can hear?"

"Oh, look! It's er…a rock! We can't talk here, the rocks might tell on us."

"Erk, that's crazy!" Priscilla said impatiently. "There's nothing out here but rocks!"

"And potatoes have eyes, and corn has ears, and—"

"If you think you're getting out of answering my question, Erk, you are very mistaken. You know me…I can be just as stubborn as my brother, and I'm not going to let you leave until you tell me what's going on."

A small silence followed this remark.

"…Okay…" Erk sighed. "Maybe you'd better sit down…this could take a while."

"That bad, eh?" Priscilla remarked, sitting down gracefully on the ground. Erk sat down next to her.

"Well, that depends on how you take it, I suppose. But…could you promise me something?"

"Of course. What is it?" as she spoke, Erk took her hand in his and held it tightly.

"No matter what I say, do you promise not to hate me?"

"Hate you?" Priscilla laughed at the absurdity of this statement. "How could I ever hate you? I don't even love Raven as much as I love you."

"…Do you promise?"

"Well, I suppose if it will make you feel better about it, then yes. I promise."

"Okay. I don't want you to hate me."

"I couldn't without hating myself, too."

"We'll see how you feel after I tell you this…" there was another small silence, and Erk sighed again. "I don't know where to begin…"

"It's usually best to start at the beginning."

"All right…I'll start from what you know. Everyone wants to know my 'real' name all of a sudden, and I don't know how that trend started. They think I'm lying about where I came from. Everyone thinks I know something about that…girl…" Priscilla nodded, encouraging him to go on. "And…I'll tell you right now…those rumors are…" he hesitated slightly. "Well…they're…they're correct." He paused for another moment to let this sink in.

"So…you're lying about where you're from? And you do know something about her?" Priscilla clarified.

"Basically, yes."

"Oh. That's…nice."

"…Do you hate me now?"

"No, no, of course not…I'd like to hear more, though. Do you know who that girl is?"

"…Yes…"

"So…who is she?" Priscilla prompted.

"Her name is Iris," Erk said quietly. "She…she's my sister."

"What?" Priscilla said, sounding rather hurt, after a stunned silence.

"Priscilla, I'm sorry I didn't tell you," Erk said hastily. "I just didn't—"

"I was going to name our daughter that!" Priscilla pouted. "Oh, well…life goes on…continue."

"Oh…" Erk said in relief. "Well…all right…um…so…yeah."

"So, you're lying about where you're from, eh? Could you elaborate on that a little bit for me?"

"Er…I told them that my parents were normal people who live on a farm and grow vegetables. And I'm from somewhere around Reglay."

"…Okay…and this is another lie, right?"

"Right."

"And you're going to tell me the truth, right?"

"Um…"

"Erk…" Priscilla said dangerously, giving him 'the look'.

"Right, right," Erk said hastily. "Okay, first of all, my parents weren't your everyday normal people. Mainly because they were noble."

"Really?" Priscilla said, intrigued. "And you never mentioned this when you're trying to tell Raven why you can marry me because…?"

"Because I was trying to protect myself. There's a reason why I'm lying about everything."

"Oh, so you've got a reason, eh? Is it a good one?"

"You hate me, don't you?"

"Erk, I do not hate you," Priscilla laughed. "I just want to know. Besides, you're the one that brought it up."

"That's true…well, anyway…yeah…my parents were noble. And we did live somewhere around Reglay…until the city was attacked and everyone died, that is."

"…Somewhere around Reglay? And it was attacked? Erk, that sounds a lot like what happened with—"

"Kuivanen," Erk supplied. "I know. That's because that's where I lived. My father was the marquess, my mother was the marchioness, and we lived in the castle. That portrait in the cathedral is of my family and I. I was little when it happened, and I changed my name to protect myself from the threat of bandits…I didn't know if they were still around, whether they were out to get me—"

"You changed your name, too?" Priscilla squeaked, as this fact had just registered itself in her brain. This was getting more and more complicated every time he added a sentence to his story.

"Well, yeah, wouldn't you?" Erk said blankly, thinking this was obvious.

"I…I suppose…assuming I found myself in such a position…"

"I was four. I was scared. I thought my entire family was dead. Do you understand why I did it?"

"Yes, of course…so…you're marquess Kuivanen's son? Wouldn't that make you—?"

"If the village existed anymore, then yes, I would be the marquess." Erk finished for her. There was a long, awkward pause.

"…And…what's your real name?" Priscilla inquired.

"I figured you'd be asking me that next…it…" Erk looked around, seeming very uncomfortable. "It's…okay, it's Emmanuel." At this, Priscilla let out a wail of despair that lasted for several seconds. Erk stared at her, perplexed. "Uh…Priscilla? Are you okay?"

"I was going to name our son that!" she cried, looking very disappointed. "It's so adorable!"

"Oh…" Erk didn't quite know how to reply to this. "Er…sorry?"

"No, it's okay," Priscilla assured him, looking almost tearful. "So…how'd you get 'Erk' out of that darling, sweet, charming little name that I decided I was going to use when I was five?"

"Priscilla, are you sure you're all right?" Erk laughed. Priscilla nodded with a little sniffle. "I'm sorry we stole your names."

"Now I'm going to have to find new ones…" Priscilla sulked.

"I don't mind if you still name him that. People are still going to call me 'Erk', anyway, because it's a lot easier to say and not nearly as time-consuming. But anyway…you ask me how I figured 'Erk' out?" Priscilla managed to nod again, resting her head on his shoulder for support. "I used my initials. Well…the first two, anyway."

"If your middle name is Roshaun," Priscilla growled. "I'm going to have to hurt you."

"…" Erk replied sheepishly.

"Aaaagh! You brat!"


And…end scene…okay, there's chapter eight. And it's even more pathetic than the last one.

Generic Pent: w00t.

You weren't supposed to agree with me.

Generic Pent: (sheepishly) w00t…

Well…I don't know when we can expect the Real Pent back…

Generic Pent: (sadly) w00t.

Yeah, he's probably gotten rid of all of them. You must be the last Generic Muse. Unless someone else got one.

(Real Pent enters)

Real Pent: Well, I'm glad that's over. Now for the last one…

O.o naughty Real Pent is out to get my generic muse. Someone has to control that guy. Well, chapter nine will be up as soon as this problem is settled…and…er…when I actually write it…