Disclaimer - All characters owned by J K Rowling. I own several shoes and a plant. If I don't make any money from this please check my e-bay account!

Chapter Two – Harry Potter

Harry Potter had a cloth in his hands and he was trying his hardest to clean the desks in Snape's classroom. What a terrible day he was having. This stuff on the desk was really difficult to clean as well. He had to wrap the cloth around it and peel it off the desk. Slurp. It wriggled free and landed happily back on the desk. He looked over at his wand forlornly. Snape was at the front of the classroom, reading a book.

"No Potter," said Snape. "You are not to use spells to clean the desk. This is part of your punishment." He went back to reading his book.

Right, he was going to get it this time. He took his shoe off and used it to beat the gel into a stupor first. Damn! It got stuck to his shoe! He tried to peel it off with his hand. Ewwww! It was cold and sticky. What looked like an eye emerged from a stalk in the jelly and stared at him? It started shaking. Hur. Hur. Hur. Was it laughing at him? It was! It was laughing at him! He started shaking his hand violently and it flew from his hand and landed on Snape's book, spattering Snape with mucous.

"POTTER! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!"

"I'm really sorry sir! It got away!"

Snape breathed deeply to try and recover his composure. "This is not working out. You leave now! This is a very expensive book." He looked down at his book and the gel extended an eyestalk and started shaking with mirth. Snape picked up his wand from his desk and pointed it at it when the gel extended a tentacle, wrapped it around the wand and threw it to the other side of the room.

Trying not to laugh, Harry sidled quietly out of the room, picking up his wand on the way out. "Yes, sir. Thank you, sir. Sorry, sir."

The last thing he saw before he left was the blob growing legs and scampering out of the room in front of him. Hmmm. It was going left. He decided he would go right.

He ran through the corridors back to the Gryffindor common room. The fat lady was on guard as normal. What was the password? God his memory was getting worse all the time. He was told it yesterday? What was it again? The painting opened and Neville came running out with his hands clutched to his mouth.

"Hi Neville. Bye Neville!" Said Harry as he ran in.

"Password? Password?" She shouted as he ran in.

Harry ignored her and ran into the common room. Where were Ron and Hermione? Oh there they were. Talking to Fred and George. Oh dear.

"Hello Harry," said Fred. "We are trying out some of our new stock." They had a range of what looked sweets on a tray in front of them.

Harry put out a hand and picked up what looked like a marshmallow? Fred paled and snatched it from Harry's hand. "I don't think you want that one again. You tried that out yesterday. Don't you remember? It took Dumbledore three hours to grow your ears back again."

What was he talking about? "I don't remember much about yesterday. Can I try out that one?" He picked up one that looked like a small biscuit.

"You don't want that one either Harry," said George looking at Fred meaningfully. "We gave one to Neville. We don't know exactly what it does but we will ask him when he gets back from the hospital wing. It is something to do with his tongue? He couldn't tell us unfortunately." He shook his head forlornly.

"I think I'll give them a miss."

Hermione was giving him a strange look. "I don't think you have been quite right since Malfoy cast that spell on you yesterday?"

What a load of rubbish. He felt fine. "Hermione, I'm okay. What is happening with this muggle trip then?"

"Tomorrow morning at 9am we are meeting up outside Hogwarts."


Harry was running through a wood. The branches seemed to be trying to trip him up. He was running from something. Something that was out of sight. He tripped up over a root and looked up to see sharp teeth.

"Aaaah!" Harry woke up with a shock. He was shaking. It was just a nightmare. He looked around him. There was the quiet snoring and murmuring of his classmates soundly asleep. What was that about? He was used to nightmares. You don't fight against Voldemort and escape unscathed. He had been scarred before both physically and mentally. He closed his eyes and tried to go back to sleep. What's the time?

"Lumos," said Harry and looked at his watch. Hmmph. Only ten minutes before 8am. He might as well get up then.

Harry quickly got changed into his gown. He then realised that he was off on his muggle field trip today. He pulled out his case from under his bed and got out his jeans and a t-shirt. It seemed strange to be wearing them again. He normally only wore them when he went to see the Dursley's. He shuddered at the thought. Oh well this should only be for a short while.

Yawning widely Ron got up. "Mornin' Harry. Not like you to be keen?"

"You know what it is like, just woke up early."

After breakfast in the great hall, Harry and Ron walked to outside Hogwarts, all the while talking about the whole pointlessness of it all. Hermione met up with them shortly afterwards and chatted about how much fun it would be.

"I don't get you Hermione?" said Harry. "You're parents are muggles, what is so exciting about going to a muggle town?"

"Harry," Hermione stopped walking. "Do you not understand anything? This is for an exam! Of course it is exciting!"

Neville started running up behind them. "Where are you three going?"

Harry rolled his eyes. "Don't you remember Neville, we've got our pointless muggle field trip today."

"What are we going again?"

"What do you mean again?"

"We went yesterday," said Neville looking confused. "Why do we have to go again? We got everything we need. I've got the Paul Daniels magic kit!" He said proudly. He got a box out of his bag, with pictures of lots of tricks. "Look I can make a coin disappear! Give me a coin." The others looked at him blankly. "It's alright I've got one. See it is in my right hand, no it's not it is in my left hand." There was a ting sound as it fell on the floor. "See it's gone!" He opened his hand up proudly.

"Eeermm Neville," said Ron. "You just dropped it on the floor."

"No I didn't."

"Yes you did, it's down there. Can't you see it?"

"I've magicked it away!"

"You dropped it on the floor," agreed Hermione.

"It's meant to be up my sleeve," said Neville. He looked up his capacious sleeve.

"Well you dropped it on the floor," said Harry. "What do you mean we went yesterday?"

"I thought it was clear." Neville was looking in his other sleeve. "Where's that dummy you three brought yesterday?"

"What dummy?"

"That ventriloquist dummy thing you three brought."

"We didn't go anywhere yesterday."

"Look let's just agree to disagree," said Neville. He looked down and his face brightened as he saw the coin. "Why didn't you tell me it fell on the floor? Anyway I've got to go, see you later."

Ron looked as Neville disappeared from sight round the corner. "Nev has gone completely bonkers."

Hermione was looking at him strangely. "Do you think we did go yesterday?"

"How could we have done?" Said Harry. "Look either we are right or Neville is right. Let's face fact's the only way Neville knows a door is in front of him is when he bumps into it. Come on let's go."

It was rather a subdued threesome that went outside Hogwarts. There where they were supposed to meet up was no one. A rather tired looking coke can was in the middle of a patch of grass. Hermione walked up to it and sniffed it.

"What are you smelling?" Said Ron.

"Magical after effects," said Hermione. "This was used as a portkey."

"They did go yesterday," said Ron.

"Correction, we went yesterday," said Hermione. "Why can't we remember it?"

Her watch suddenly started squeaking. "Magical history! You have magical history in ten minutes!"

"Come on! We can talk about this later."

They filed into their lesson and sat down. Hermione sat at the front and Harry and Ron took up their normal places at the back. Professor Bins, the ghostly master of History, was just starting to talk about the Elvin laws of 1665 and why it led indirectly to the dragon wars. This apparently also led to the burning down of London in 1666 but apparently the wizards at the time thought it better to blame a baker in pudding lane than an 80 foot fire breathing lizard.

Harry looked about him. Malfoy and his two cronies were there, also looking bored. Well to be honest Crabbe and Goyle were not looking bored. Considering they had to concentrate just to breathe and walk around they didn't have time to be bored. Malfoy was busy writing on a piece of paper. When professor Bins turned around and started drawing various arrows on the board to show the movements of the various dragon armies he turned around and showed it to Harry. It was a crudely drawn picture of Harry apparently with a dummy on his lap. The dummy was moving around the picture and apparently hitting Harry. Malfoy was smirking. What an idiot.

The lesson ended, about fifty years later in the first international Quidditch finals. Apparently it was a great match as only ten wizards died. This lead to a rule to not hold matches on mountaintops in thunderstorms and only wooden broomsticks are allowed because of that.

The day seemed to drag interminably on. At long last they could leave and headed back to their dormitories.

"Should we tell Dumbledore about this?" asked Hermione.

"What that we can't remember anything?" said Ron. "He'll just think we are trying to get out of our lessons."

They filed into Harry's dormitory. There at the end of his bed was a small wooden puppet. It was dressed in a red top and trousers with black eyes and a painted scar down the side of his wooden face. His mouth contained hundreds of sharp teeth.