The Naked Truth

By Lyo (with help from Meirelle)

Disclaimer: Ronin Warriors is the property of Bandai, Sunrise. No profit is being made in the use of these characters.

Summary: The Ronins' trip to NY isn't going so well. Questions are asked, answers are given (some of them a bit disturbing), and it's driving Cye to drink! (prequel to "Sixteen Seconds")


Kento threw open the door. "Here it is!"

Cye Mouri raised his eyebrows. The room, oddly enough, was not a shanty. It was large with a fluffy white carpet, large couches, and four brown doors slightly open to reveal other rooms inside. There was a small kitchen with marbleized appliances, right down to the refrigerator.

"This isn't half bad," Rowen murmured, coming into the door.

"Yeah. Uncle Chin helped out a bit when I told him Mia and Yuli were coming," Kento explained. He walked into the hotel room and dropped his carry-on. "And, of course, I can't go back to school for another year."

"Anything to keep out of university, right?" Sage smiled at the other man and held the door open for the bellhop. It was a nice hotel, picked up their luggage and took them on a quick and rather useless tour of New York. A lot of "Oh, that was a famous theatre. That was the Hard Rock Café," all after they'd passed the famous landmarks.

Sage, in typical fashion, didn't seem particularly impressed with the lush surroundings, shucking off his shoes, but of course he wouldn't be impressed with the surroundings. He was a bastard like that.

"You got it," Kento replied, and he amiably punched Sage's shoulder a little harder than necessary, hard enough for the blond to frown and rub his arm.

"Sage, play nice," Mia warned as she came in after the bellhop. "Oh, Kento, this really is lovely. Thank you so much for inviting me." She threw her arms around the Chinese man.

Cye rolled his eyes again. There was a pain building behind his eyes already. "Kento, where is the mini-bar?"

"It's over by the window, sir," the bellhop supplied.

"Ah, wonderful." Cye peeled a few bills from his wallet and handed them to the pimple-faced girl. "You have a good day."

"I will, sir," the girl murmured, looking at the bills with a bit of a dark frown before leaving the hotel room, narrowly missing Ryo with Yuli in tow.

"Yuli, come on."

"I want to see New York again, Ryo," the boy snapped. In eight years, he'd filled out into a lanky young man, reminding Cye of Rowen at that age. Of course, Yuli was not as smart, or clueless, as Rowen had been. Instead, Yuli was a proper teenager who hated Ryo with a passion usually reserved for one's parents.

"We'll have plenty of time to see New York after we get a little settled," Rowen offered, and the teen grinned at him. Yuli liked Rowen, now. Rowen was "cool," as Rowen had a "cool" habit of supplying homework answers without meaning to.

That and Rowen and Ryo famously butted heads.

"Okay," Yuli said begrudgingly.

"So, can we do rooms?" Sage asked. He began poking around the luggage cart. "I want to unpack."

"Afraid your clothes are going to wrinkle?" Ryo asked and pulled his one, garish orange suitcase from the pile. "Or your hairspray is going to leak?"

Sage didn't rise to the challenge, instead burrowing through the mountain of luggage like a mole.

Rowen, however, was not so forgiving. "Leave him alone, Ryo."

"Did I hurt your roomie's feelings?" Ryo asked, smirking. He winked at Yuli.

"I know you're bitter about White Blaze having to stay home, but baiting Rowen and Sage won't get you anywhere," Mia said softly. She put her hand on Ryo's shoulder.

"Oo-oh," Yuli whispered, and Cye smirked, as did Kento. Ryo and Mia still lived together, eight years after it had been necessary. They'd all lived with Mia during school vacations, but no one else actually moved in besides Ryo.

"So, room assignments?" Cye asked.

"Oh, yeah, well," Kento said, and then he frowned. "I figured it out on the pla—"

"Stop," Sage called. The blond stood and went into the kitchen for a paper towel to rub his hands on. "My bags aren't here."

"Not even your carry-on?" Mia asked, and she stepped away from Ryo to pick through the luggage.

"I have that, but that only has Rowen's toothbrush and some books."

"You grabbed my toothbrush?" Rowen asked, head cocked to the side. "Thanks."

"Aw, how cute," Kento snapped as he tore through the luggage. "How many bags did you have?"

"Eight," Ryo called.

"Three," Sage hissed.

Ryo paid no mind. "Seven for hair gel and one for Rowen's underwear."

Cye wandered over to the mini-bar as Rowen snapped, "You're just bitter that your bed's gonna be cold tonight without White Blaze."

"Cye, is there any wine there?" Mia called.

"Rowen, that's sick," Kento yelled.

He nodded and pulled out a small bottle of blush and three-ounce bottle of vodka for himself. "A bit. You want me to start you off with a full glass?"

"No, half for now."

"Mia," Yuli snapped, "it's only three-thirty. It's not time to be drinking."

"Help me search, Yuli," the woman replied.

"Sage's stuff isn't here, Mia." Cye watched Yuli go to the plush couches and turn on the television. "You would have found it."

"Kento," Sage hissed, "where is my luggage?"

"Yeah. Rowen needs his underwear."

"I have my underwear," Rowen spat, and he grabbed the Chinese man by the arms. "Where are Sage's things?"

"Aw, look at him defend—"

Sage stepped into Ryo's face. "We are going to stop the gay jokes now, because if we do not, I will be forced to beat you to death with an empty wine bot—"

"We don't have any empty wine bottles," Ryo interjected.

"Yet," Mia responded. "Just fill it up, Cye," she called, and Cye nodded. He sat down beside Yuli with the tiny vodka bottle and grinned at Ryo.

"Shut up, Cye," Kento snapped.

"Kento, you will call the airport and the hotel," Sage said with the same soft tone he'd used to threaten Ryo.

"Fine. I'll do that after we get everything settled," Kento offered. "Can you call off your spedly dog?"

Cye smirked as Rowen shoved his friend away before stepping back beside Sage. "Where am I sleeping?"

"Yes, this should be a good one," Cye murmured to Yuli, and Mia as she joined them on the couch, "I only count three bedrooms."

Kento came to stand in front of the television. "I spent a lot of time on the airplane thinking about this. When I ordered this room, there were only the five of us coming, before Ryo invited Mia and Mia invited Yuli." Kento glared over at Ryo, who was separating the luggage under Sage's watchful eyes, just in case his luggage was truly there.

"Mia and Yuli need to be here. This is a reunion thing." Ryo walked over to stand beside the couch. "You're just lucky I didn't invite Lady Kayura and the warlords."

"I did," Sage called. He sat on the other couch and crossed his arms. "They were too busy to venture into the mortal realm with all the English that happens to be in New York, though Sekhmet was tempted."

Cye finished the vodka. He was glad for that. The mini-bar was understocked for him and Mia. Add in Sekhmet and it would have been cleared out in a little under a day.

Kento rolled his eyes. "Anyway, so I figured that Rowen and Sage would room together, because their schedules compliment, and Rowen's snoring doesn't bother Sage."

"That's only because I'm never asleep when he is," Sage snapped. "No offense."

Rowen sat down beside the blond and shrugged. "None taken. You would keep me awake with all your 'stillness' when you sleep. Completely unnatural."

Ryo said something into his hand, and Sage kicked his leg. "Ryo, you should set an example for Yuli. He's still impressionable."

Yuli smirked up at Ryo. "Yeah, Ryo. I'm still not sure why you need to call Rowen and Sage gay all the time. My mom says the more you obsess about something, the more it reveals about you." His smirk widened. "So, what does that say about you?"

"Inferno Armor," Rowen coughed.

"Moving on," Kento boomed, waving his hands. "Cye and I will bunk together, and then Ryo and Yuli will have the last bedroom—"

Yuli jumped up. "Oh, I am not sleeping in Ryo's room. There is no way I am staying with him." The boy's blue eyes were wild and frightened as he looked at Rowen and then Cye. "You have to tell Kento that this is a bad idea."

"Yuli," Ryo said softly, and even Rowen would be able to see the man was hurt. "It won't be so bad."

"Oh, it will be so bad. It will be so bad that I won't be able to sleep. Mia, talk to him," Yuli whined, pointing to Kento. "Tell him this is a bad idea."

"I agree," Mia said with a nod. "That is a bad idea. He can sleep with you and Cye or something."

"Or on the couch," Cye said quickly. "The couches are very comfy."

"Little kids sleep on the couch," Yuli replied in a haughty tone. "I am not a little kid. I am a teenager. I deserve a bed or at least a sleeping bag on someone's floor."

"Because that's adult," Sage muttered, but the boy didn't hear him, thankfully. Sage's lack of talent for children extended into the teenage years. Yuli only tolerated him because the blond was Rowen's best friend.

Cye stood up again and walked back to the mini-bar for more vodka. "Well, I suppose it's all right, if Kento won't mind."

Kento sighed. "Fine. Yuli can sleep on our floor."

"Cool," Yuli said, and he disappeared into one of the bedrooms.

"We still have to pick them out, Yuli," Rowen called as the door slammed shut.

Mia coughed. "Glad that is settled. So, Kento, I have a small question." Her tone made Cye cringe as he brought two more tiny vodka bottles back to the couches. It was reminiscent of the one she'd use after they'd had an indoor water balloon battle.

"Yeah, Mia?"

"Where do I sleep?"

Cye twisted the top off the first bottle while he watched Kento shift his weight, uncomfortable. "Well, uh, Mia, uh." He scratched his head and shrugged. "I sorta thought you could sleep on the couch."

The woman took a long sip of her wine as Sage stared at the standing man. "Kento. She can't sleep on the couch."

"She's a girl," Rowen cried.

Ryo threw a couch cushion at Rowen but agreed. "It's sort of, well, Mia is a chick."

"And it's not right to have her sleep on the couch. She needs a bedroom." Sage nodded and leaned forward. "One of us can sleep on the couch."

Mia put her now-empty wine glass on the end table. "I am not sleeping on the couch. At all."

"Well, then you can room with Ryo. He has an extra bed, and you already live together." Kento waggled his eyebrows. "All the comforts of home."

"Kento!" Ryo roared, jumping to his feet. "She can't sleep with me."

"Why? Is there something wrong?" Cye asked, innocent, as he finished the first bottle. They needed to stop arguing. He was going to be right gone if he had to get up again. Sekhmet didn't even need to come along.

Ryo's cheeks turned red as Rowen bowed his head, shoulders shaking with laughter. "Nothing is wrong, Cye. I can sleep with Mia—"

"Ryo!" Mia tossed a coaster at him.

"But it's not right for us to share a room when we're not even dating."

Kento laughed. "Maybe Yuli had a point." He shook his head and held up his hands before Ryo could comment. "Look, Mia, it's sleep in Ryo's room or sleep on the couch."

She put her hands on her hips. "What if I like to sleep naked?"

"Does she, Ryo?" Rowen asked without so much as smiling. Sage hit him. "Ow! I was just curious, because I sleep naked."

Cye almost dropped the second bottle of vodka. "You what?" he cried.

Rowen stared straight ahead. "I like to sleep naked. I wonder if Lady Kayura sleeps naked."

"You would wonder that," Mia murmured, shaking her head.

"Sage, does Rowen really sleep naked?"

The blond nodded once, eyes closed. He had the grace to look a little embarrassed. "He also has a tendency to kick the blankets away."

"And you still room with him?" Cye asked, incredulous.

Sage's cheeks picked up a hint of pigment, but he glared at Ryo. "I don't room with him as much as I used to, and it's not that big of a deal. Nothing I haven't seen before."

"Do you like the show?" Ryo asked.

"Ryo," Mia scolded. "Leave Sage alone before he really does beat you to death. How would I explain that to White Blaze?"

Kento's mouth was still hanging open. "Well, ah, wow. Um." He pressed his hands together. "First, Sage is still too gay to be gay, Ryo. Stop worrying. And, um, I guess you can sleep in Ryo's room, Mia, and he can sleep out here."

"Oh, thanks for asking," Ryo snarled.

"Would you rather sleep with me?" Sage asked sweetly, grinning.

Ryo glared at the other man. "I should say yes."

"Do you sleep naked?" Rowen asked. "Because, if you do, you should sleep on the floor. Sage doesn't like naked people in beds. He thinks it's kinda gross."

"It's only gross if they sit on my bed," Sage snapped back. "Seriously, Ryo, we could call up for a cot or some extra blankets."

"Nah." Ryo sighed. "Since I'm the partnerless one, I will fall on my sword and take the couch."

"Ooh, historic illusion." Rowen put his feet up on the coffee table. "Someone was awake for class."

"Hey, it happens to the best of us," Kento said, hand to his chest. "It's hard to sleep through class when they keep talking in those loud voices."

"Bastards," Cye murmured. The fighting was over, and he'd only finished off three mini-bottles of vodka and Mia was only nursing her second glass of wine.

"Okay. So, let's get our luggage situated." Mia stood up and went for her suitcases. "Yuli, we're picking rooms."

"Whatever," Yuli called back.

Kento frowned. "Cye, your stuff is the powder blue ones, right?"

"Powder blue?" Sage muttered to Rowen. "Mine are black, but somehow, I'm the gay one."

Rowen shrugged. "And Cye's British, too. Doesn't make sense."

"Leave Cye alone," Ryo snapped. "Cye's cool. He doesn't alphabetize his spices or anything. That would be a little, well." Ryo snapped his wrist back and forth.

"I need more vodka," Cye murmured. "I need to go and buy more vodka." He stood up. "Kento, I'll go to the front desk and ask about Sage's non-gay luggage, and then I am going to the liquor store."

Kento was quick to come to stand beside him. "Uh, Cye, man, don't you think you've had enough?"

"I'm twenty-two and British. I've hardly started," he responded, nose to the air.

"Um, I thought the Irish were the drinkers."

Cye rolled his eyes. "Where do you think they got it from?" He shook his head. "I shall return." He walked out the open door without putting on his shoes. It seemed silly. He was only on the tenth floor, and the front desk was just beside the stairwell.

He nodded to himself. He'd take the stairs.

"Hey, Cye, come on, man. Come back!" Kento was following him. Kento always followed him, and it was rather annoying.

"I'll handle it." Cye pushed the door to the stairs open and began running down the stairs, two at a time.

Then he took one the wrong way, where the skid guard was gone and the step was wet from an open window. He fell, he rolled, and there was a crack echoing throughout the stairwell.

"Cye!" Kento screamed again, and he was beginning to sound a bit like a broken record. "Dude, are you okay?"

Cye looked at his leg, and it seemed oddly still. He tried to stand once before landing firmly on his backside again. "No, it would appear that I am not."

"What's wrong?" Kento took the stairs in shoes, one at time. He didn't fall. Bastard.

"Broke my leg. Stupid Yank stairs."

"Right. It's not the vodka. It's the Americans."

Cye smiled. The pain hadn't started yet. "Of course, Americans. It's always the Americans."

"Sure, dude." Kento picked him up as if he was nothing, and Cye frowned. "I know, but I don't have my wallet or anything. Besides, Sage should be able to heal that."

"Sage and Rowen are going to have a field day."

"That's Ryo's fault." Kento shrugged, and then Cye could feel the pain. He hissed loudly.

"I need more vodka."

"Right." Kento got him back onto the tenth floor and then into the hotel room. Predictably, Mia and Ryo jumped up like rabbits with concerned expressions. Rowen was on the telephone, but he did stick his head out of the kitchen area. Sage even uncrossed his arms.

"Dude, what happened?" Ryo asked.

"Genius here was running down the stairs half-gone and in socks. He fell—"

"I was not half-gone. I only had a little vodka," Cye interjected. "It was the shoddy Yank stairs."

"Whatever." Kento put him down on the couch. "Sage, do your thing."

"My thing?" Sage asked. He crossed his arms again.

"I'm doomed," Cye groaned. He took Mia's wine from the coffee table. "Ryo, get me a glass, please."

Kento frowned. "No more, Cye. Lay off until Sage heals you."

"That's not going to be so easy, Kento." Rowen came out of the kitchen. "Found Sage's luggage. Little mix-up at the airport."

"And where is it?" Sage asked. His hair looked a little droopy.

Rowen sighed. "France."

"France?"

"France."

Sage turned on Kento. "This is your fault."

"I didn't tag the luggage. It's not my—"

Cye held up his hands. "My leg is broken."

"It is," Rowen observed. "It looks painful."

He could have sworn that his eye twitched. "Rowen, do me a favor and get me a glass. Now." Rowen went back into the kitchen. "So, my leg is broken, and Sage's bloody armor crystal is in bloody France?"

"That's a lot of bloody," Ryo observed as he clapped Kento on the shoulder. "Looks like you screwed up again, buddy."

Kento smacked Ryo away and pointed at Sage. "Oh, no. Wasn't it Sage's job to pack all the armor crystals separately in case our luggage got mishandled. He thought of it."

Cye's eyes turned to Sage, and the blond looked too calm. "Brilliant deduction there, mate. So we're all defenseless."

The blond smiled, and Cye didn't like it as his eye was most definitely twitching, and the pain emanating from his leg was getting to be too much. This was still Kento's fault, somehow, but it was so easy to be mad at calm, arrogant, and collected Sage who would have never been so stupid to break his leg on the stairs, American or no.

"Ryo didn't trust me to remember to bring the crystals." Sage came over to stand beside Ryo, patting the smaller man on the shoulder. "'You're too busy babysitting Rowen, Sage. You can't be responsible for all of us, Sage. I'm the leader, Sage. It should be my responsibility, Sage. You'll just forget them, Sage.' So, esteemed leader, please, bequeath me my armor crystal, and I'll heal him."

Ryo's face went pale.

Cye groaned. "Kento, please call the hospital. My insurance cards and such are in my carryon."

"Now, you don't know that Ryo left them at the house." Mia put Ryo's suitcase on the coffee table and cracked it open. She began sifting through Ryo's clothes.

"Dude, it looks like Rowen packed for you," Kento observed, obviously not listening to Cye's requests. "And Mia has no problem feeling up your drawers, eh?" Kento stood on the other side of Ryo, elbowing him. "So, does she sleep naked?"

Ryo still looked pale, and he was making a point of staring at the blank television screen.

"You forgot the armor crystals," Cye stated, glaring at their leader. "They're still in Japan."

"Without them, we can't fight evil!" Rowen cried, tossing Cye a plastic cup before collapsing on the other couch. "You are going to get us killed." He sat up and glared at Kento. "This is your fault, too, isn't it? You sent Sage's hairspray to France so all that hair would fall in his face, and then he wouldn't see your evil plot. And then you broke Cye's leg so he can't tell that you're a lying bastard. And you broke into Ryo's suitcase and removed the armor crystals so when the Dynasty attacks us, we'll be defenseless." Rowen nodded to himself. "You've been possessed like Lady Kayura!"

Ryo stepped between Rowen and Kento, holding his hands out. "No, Rowen. I just, well, Kento told me that we weren't bringing White Blaze, so I had to break the news to him. He was upset; I needed to comfort him."

Sage coughed but said nothing.

"Not like that, Sage. You're sick. Anyway, so they're on Mia's kitchen table beside my wallet." Ryo scratched his neck. "I forgot to toss them into the carryon in case of emergency on the plane."

"Ryo, you're an idiot." Cye rubbed his eyes and grabbed Mia's wine. "Kento, please. Call the hospital." Kento nodded and disappeared back to the kitchen.

"Oh, Ryo is not an idiot, Cye. How was he supposed to know this would happen?" Mia clapped the suitcase open.

"Oh, Mia. Ryo is so an idiot. He's such an idiot that he makes Cale look like a neuro-physicist," Yuli said, coming into the room. "I need batteries. My Walkman ran out again."

Ryo coughed. "Those are on the table too, at Mia's house."

"See? Idiot." Yuli rolled his eyes in disgust. "I'm going to the gift shop for more batteries. And I'll watch out for the stairs, and I won't talk to strangers, and I will be right back up." He walked out the door and slammed it.

Mia frowned. "Cye, since you broke your leg, I think you should sleep on the couch."

He nodded, wary. "That would make sense."

"And since Yuli won't sleep in the same room as Ryo, I guess he'll have to room with Sage and Rowen."

Sage nodded, sitting down on the arm of Rowen's couch. He looked equally dubious. "Probably."

"And Rowen sleeps naked."

Rowen nodded. "I do."

A grin split Cye's face as he lifted his glass to Mia. "Rowen, don't do Yuli any favors."


Notes:

1. Take Rowen and Sage's relationship as you will in this fic. In my mind, this is a non-yaoi fic, but there are some moments where best-friends and boyfriends blend a little. The joking is just supposed to be poking fun, and everything said is meant in jest. I'm not saying that I don't think one or more of the Ronins couldn't be bisexual, but I'll leave that up to the reader.

2. Yuli seems a little OOC, but he is as old as the Ronins were when they were fighting Talpa, and this is how non-world-saving teenagers can act. Since Ryo had a tendency to be the "cool" guy to Ryo when he was young, it makes sense he'd want to rebel against him.

3. Cye is British, because I'm going with dub!canon, and it is funnier that way. Even though it really is the Irish who tend to drink more, and they did not get that from the British.

4. This fic came from the inspiration of explaining the situation in "Sixteen Seconds." It is not necessary to read "Sixteen Seconds" to understand this fic or vice versa. In case there is any confusion, we are just writing silly vignettes. There will really be no point to this. We just like to amuse ourselves with Rowen asking such poignant, life-altering questions like "I wonder if Lady Kayura sleeps naked."