I do not own Inu-yasha.
Part Four
Kagome slept soundly. Inu-yasha looked down at her, and making sure that her breathing was regular and even, he turned on the weird device called a 'flashlight' and opened Kagome's diary.
March 18
Today was interesting. It's amazing how Inu-yasha can be so naive sometimes. Kikyo came today. She has been here a lot. No one noticed her hiding among the shadows, but I felt her. It scared me almost. But then I knew that Inu-yasha would be there and wouldn't let her hurt me. Her aura has seemed so...evil and threatening lately. No one but me ever seems to feel her. It makes me wonder if she's doing it on purpose.
But today was different. Her aura was so strong and it made it hard for me to breathe. Even Inu-yasha seemed to notice something. Is Kikyo trying to challange me? I don't know. Does she really have a reason to hate me? I don't plan to get between her and Inu-yasha. My life here is going to be to find the shards, kill Naraku, then go home. Then Inu-yasha will go to Hell with her. But her aura today... I was so scared this time that she was going to kill me. I could almost hear her aura talk to me, saying, 'Die, young reincarnation, die.' and 'Get away from Inu-yasha, leave him now!'. I don't what to think.
Inu-yasha caught me shivering and put his kimono top on me, thinking I was cold. I didn't want to make him worry and so I just told him thanks and pretended that it was cold. I don't want him to worry about my safty. He has bigger problems than me to worry about.
Inu-yasha looked at the girl sleeping on the ground. Kikyo had been appearing a lot? March...that month had just ended yesterday. Now he was more sure than ever that Kikyo was going to try and kill Kagome again. She didn't care about his threat. She probably thought he wouldn't carry it out. He shook his head and continued reading.
March 20
I've been crying today. Inu-yasha is on the other side of the well right now. At least he can't see me like this-a girl with a broken smile. Whenever my mother or friends or whoever comes to talk to me, I will smile, and wipe my tears away. But my smile will be fake, and it won't be the same as a real one. I think I can live with this broken smile if it will fool everyone. I really don't want Inu-yasha to see me like this. He'll worry, maybe...I really don't know. I just want his happiness. Will my sorrow change his state of mind? I don't want him to worry. I don't want him to worry. If my happiness is at stake for his, then I will risk it. I'll keep my broken smile on and make believe that everything is alright. Everything will turn out alright, everything will turn out alright for him. I'll make sure of it.
Inu-yasha turned off the flashlight and stuck it and the diary into Kagome's book bag. Did she really care this much for him? And all he did was underapperciate her. She was right. She did live in his world everyday, he should spent at least one in her world. At least one day just for Kagome. No shards, or Naraku, or Kikyo. Just Kagome. Everything would be just for her. He went to her sleeping form and sat down next to her.
Her chest moved up and down slowly. Her arms were around Shippo almost like a teddy bear. A small smile was on her face. Was it one of her broken smiles? What was she dreaming about? Was she dreaming about him?
"Inu-yasha...," she mumbled.
So she was! He stopped thinking and looked intensely at Kagome, waiting for her next words.
"Don't...worry...I'm alright...you don't need to...stand up for me...just keep your happiness...that's all."
Inu-yasha drew some hair out of her face and pulled it behind her ear. Was she so intent on making him happy that she wouldn't mind dying if it made him happy? Would she let him kill her if he said it would make him happy? Would he really kill Kikyo? He couldn't get rid of the thought. He had already promised Kikyo one thing that he planned to carry out, could he carry out this other promise? Maybe he would. If he was angry enough.
Inu-yasha tried to picture a life without Kagome's constant smiling...and her constant sitting. He didn't like it. Kikyo would come right away and come to claim him. Would he really go with her to Hell? He shook his head again. He didn't want to think about it. Cursed thinking! A brain should only be used to figure out battle plans! Nothing else.
Kagome moved a bit and Inu-yasha looked down at her as her eyes fluttered open. "Inu-yasha?" she asked.
"I'm here," he replied.
"I was dreaming, it was a good dream. We were all at a picnic. It was a great day."
Liar, he thought. "Oh, okay, but you looked kind of scared when you were sleeping."
"It must of been the test I have in a few weeks."
Why did she have to keep lying? He had asked her mother if she had any tests coming up. He didn't want to hear that excuse again. "Oh, alright then." Did he reveal to her about the diary, or why he stood up for her against Kikyo? He mentally shook his head. Too early. He wanted to know more about Kikyo's comings and goings.
Kagome smiled at him and pulled out the diary he had put in her bag only seconds ago. "I'll just finish writing something in here, and then we can all get going if you want."
He looked around and saw the others sleeping soundly. They wouldn't be awake to hear this. Still so, he listened for their even breathing and the rythium of their heart beats. "Kagome," he said, and watched her look up from the small book.
"Yes? Something the matter?"
"I'm sorry."
"Whatever for, Inu-yasha?" A confused look overcame her face.
"I'm just sorry, that's all, for making fun of your cooking, I guess." Inu-yasha had realized the mistake in saying sorry, so he quickly covered it up with a lie of his own.
"Oh, that's all right. I have to practice a lot, I know that, but Mom says she might teach me."
Inu-yasha seriously doubted that Kagome could ever cook like Higurashi-san, but didn't voice his opinon. Better to be above the ground, then one with it.
Shippo turned in his sleep and woke up, rubbing an eye. "Morning Kagome," he said to her sleepily. He turned to Inu-yasha. "Ehh," he groaned as a greeting to him.
Inu-yasha just glared at him for breaking the time he had to talk to Kagome and then turned back to Kagome to watch her put the diary away.
"Good morning, Shippo. Did you sleep well?"
Shippo nodded, waking up more as the monk and Sango woke up as well.
They all said their good mornings, except for Inu-yasha who meerly regretted not being able to wake them up himself. He quite enjoying punishing them for sleeping in so late. Miroku would scold him about humans and their 'energy needs', and Inu-yasha would ignore him, thinking more about how he would wake them up the next day.
But that was different today, he thought more about Kikyo and Kagome. Why was Kikyo so intent on killing the young miko? Kagome posed no threat to her. She was just here to gether shards. Maybe she thought he loved Kagome, or something like that. Was it jealousy? He glanced at Kagome and blushed lightly.
Feh. Like he would ever love Kagome. He looked at her again and almost smiled as he noticed her having a hard time with a skillet. He shook his head. He wasn't suppose to think thoughts like that. He did not love Kagome. He did not love Kagome. Sometimes he would have to say that in his head to remind him. Lately now, he was saying it more and more to himself. As much as he wanted it to be a truth, he was growing more and more sure that it was all a lie.
He blushed slightly again and started chanting it over and over in his head.
'I do not love Kagome. I do not love Kagome. I do not love Kagome. I do not love Kagome.' Thinking he would be able to go with that, he looked up and saw Kagome in his face.
Startled, he jumped back and up at the same time, hitting his head on a low tree branch and against the trunk as well. "Damn it," he cursed, holding his head with both hands.
"Inu-yasha, are you alright?"
He opened his eyes and saw Kagome standing a few feet in front of him, a worried look on her face. "Feh, I'm fine," he growled, blushing in embarressment. He really didn't want to be around them right now. He could tell the monk would have a smug look on his face, Sango would probably be hiding a smile, badly as always, and Shippo would be on the ground, rolling and laughing his ass off.
Inu-yasha could hear the kitsune's laughter even now. Growling, he went to the kitsune on the ground and picked him up by the tail. "You got a problem?" he said gruffly.
Kagome sighed. And the day had been going so well...
