EPISODE SEVEN: Journeys

She'd held it as long as she could, but when she reached her room, Sakura couldn't restrain herself any longer, and burst into laughter. It started as giggles, but quickly worked up into a snorting, gasping, doubled-over cascade of mirth. She laughed for several minutes before it all died down and she sighed, leaning against the wall. Then she glanced over to the door, where Sasuke stood, looking at her like she'd gone insane.

"What was that about?" Sasuke asked.

Sakura giggled again, and said, "Did you hear what Naruto said at dinner? When he was telling us about his day?"

"Yes, but I fail to see..."

"That's because you don't know! Kakashi-sensei told me that the Grass Ninjas might try to get us to betray Konoha... he said they might 'seduce' us!"

"And..."

"Don't you get it? They tried to 'seduce' Naruto! With a boy! And he didn't even figure it out! I can't decide which side was stupider!"

"You mean you knew this might happen?" Sasuke asked.

"Well yeah," Sakura said, "Kakashi-sensei mentioned it the day we arrived."

"Why didn't you tell us?"

"I didn't think it mattered," Sakura replied, now feeling a little uncertain. Why was Sasuke so hung up on this? "After all, you and I have each other, so seduction wouldn't work on us... and Naruto's too stupid to be of any use against Konoha."

"What about him?"

"Huh?"

"If Naruto joined Hidden Grass Village," Sasuke said, starting to pace, "he'd become a missing-nin to Konoha. The ANBU or hunter-nins would kill him at the first opportunity. And once they realized he couldn't help them, the ninjas here would certainly kick them out of this village. He'd be helpless!"

"What are you saying?"

"Betraying Konoha would be a death sentence for Naruto," Sasuke explained, and Sakura's heart skipped a beat. Sure, she didn't like Naruto, but she didn't hate him so much as to want him dead.

"I didn't think..."

"Well you should have!" Sasuke snapped, "My brother told me to always watch out for my teammates. Naruto's too stupid to defend himself against things like seduction, so we have to make sure he doesn't get in trouble! That's what it means to be on a team!"

"Oh? You've got no right to say that!" Sakura retorted, her inner self showing through. "It's not like you've kept such a close eye on him!"

Sasuke's mouth opened and closed a few times. Then he turned and left the room, saying, "Well, I'm going to check up on him now and make sure he doesn't do anything stupid."

"Sasuke, wait!" Sakura cried, but the door slammed shut behind the boy. She heard his footsteps disappearing down the hall. DAMMIT! she thought, Stupid Naruto ruins everything!


"Are you leaving?" a familiar voice asked, and Naruto turned to see his new friend Kenji standing a few feet away, the white stripes of his camouflage tinged pink by the early-morning sun.

"Yeah," Naruto replied, adjusting the straps on his threadbare backpack. Like almost half his stuff, it had come from a dumpster, and so it was a little too large, and one of the less important straps was broken. It had served its purpose admirably thus far, though, and fetching it from the dumpster had freed up enough funds for Naruto to buy a day's worth of ramen and a collapsible shuriken.

"We got a new mission," Naruto explained, "This old guy and his grandson need an escort while they go through Fire Country to Wave Country. Your Master asked us to do it, since we're from Fire Country ourselves." He grinned and added, "It's my second C-class mission! I'll be Hokage before you know it, at this rate!"

Kenji smiled, too, his bright brown eyes almost glowing in the dawn light. His expression shifted to something more wistful, though, as he added, "I wish you weren't going."

"Oh? Why's that?" Naruto asked, feeling a little suspicious. Last night, he'd thought Sasuke's little tirade was completely ridiculous. As far as Naruto was concerned, Kenji was just a nice, friendly guy—there was no way he'd try to get Naruto to betray the Leaf. Hearing Kenji's comment, though, Naruto began to wonder if Sasuke might have been right.

Kenji blushed, saying, "I... uh... I can't tell you right here." He pointed to an alley next to the hotel Naruto had just exited, and asked, "Can we duck in there for a sec?"

"Sure," Naruto said, still willing to give Kenji the benefit of the doubt. Besides, the others probably wouldn't show up for at least another ten minutes... and it might be an hour before Kakashi appeared.

"Great!" Kenji said, lunging forward and grabbing Naruto's hand. The Leaf ninja had trouble keeping up as he was tugged into the narrow, shadowed lane. He blushed as he realized that Kenji still hadn't released his hand.

"So..." Naruto prompted, feeling strangely nervous. Sasuke's warnings were still echoing in his head, and he began to wonder if it had been wise to follow the Grass ninja into a darkened alley.

"I... um... You'll come back someday, right?"

"Yeah! When I'm Hokage, this'll be the first place I visit! I'll come see you!"

Kenji smiled, his hand squeezing Naruto's. "Great!" he said. "I... I really want to see you again, sometime."

"Me too!" Naruto said, then added, "I mean, I wanna see you again... 'cause I see me all the time."

Kenji chuckled quietly and leaned towards Naruto. "I'm glad," he murmured, "'cause... I think..." He trailed off and looked uncertain for a moment, then lunged forward and hugged Naruto briefly.

Before Naruto could say anything, Kenji had vanished, and the blonde realized his new friend had leaped away. He likes me, Naruto thought as he meandered down the lane, He wants to see me again.

As he emerged from the alley, Naruto saw Sasuke and Sakura leaving the hotel, hands entwined. "Stupid Sasuke," Naruto growled to himself, "you just wanna keep me from havin' any friends. You've got Sakura, so why've you gotta try to fuck up my life?"

Naruto's teammates noticed him at that moment, and their hands flew apart as if they'd just given each other a static shock. Jeez, how stupid do they think I am? Naruto wondered, but before he could say or do anything Kakashi also appeared, leading an old man and a little boy.

Mission time! Naruto thought, all concerns about his teammates forgotten as he bounded across the street to meet his sensei. He'd have to leave Hidden Grass now, but someday soon he'd come back and visit.

Kenji was a really nice guy, after all.


Hikaru paused at the top of a large sand dune and closed his eyes, reaching out with his mind to find any signs of pursuit. If even one ninja of the Hidden Villages discovered the extent of his power, they might figure out what goal Hikaru had been working towards for years. The chance was remote; after all, paranoia was a hallmark of ninja life, and completely realizing his intentions would require the villages to collaborate extensively. Still, it was wise to be cautious, so Hikaru extended his senses, seeking out even the tiniest wisp of chakra in the area.

To a human eye, the desert was a dead place—sun-blasted sand interspersed with rocks that had been baked dry by years spent beneath a cloudless sky. Hikaru, however, could sense the life that teemed even in this hospitable landscape: microbes swarming in subterranean pools, tiny flowers hidden within rocklike shells that would open during the rare rains, poisonous scorpions, crafty spiders, gaunt desert mice, and cacti. He could sense no people, though, none of the unique resonance that life processes and spiritual awareness created when they coexisted in a body. Of course, he did perceive, without really trying, the echo of Gaara's power, obvious even at this distance.

Hikaru smiled ruefully as he thought of the boy who had guided him through the warrens of Hidden Sand village. He had taken such a guide in each of the villages he had visited so far, but none of them had made him feel regret like Gaara. The poor boy, tormented by a demon his own family had implanted in him, then abandoned to loneliness and pain by that same family, had desperately needed the affection that Hikaru had offered. Yet even now, Gaara's memory of his visitor would be fading, a necessary precaution if Hikaru's plans were to bear fruit. No one could know of his intentions, even if they deserved to remember his visit.

Hikaru released the jutsu that allowed him to sense the chakra of others, frowning as he thought of the cruelty of the Sand ninjas. Without question, they had earned the punishment he had prepared for them, yet in this case the thought of taking vengeance didn't satisfy Hikaru's heart. Gaara reminded Hikaru too much of his own childhood loneliness and grief, before he'd found his Mother... before he'd found his calling. Gaara had lived without love before Hikaru came, and now that the traveler was leaving, he would forget having ever felt it.

You deserve to remember happiness as you die, Gaara, Hikaru thought, and for a moment he contemplated returning to Hidden Sand and kidnapping the boy, taking him home. He knew, however, that the idea was unworkable, that Gaara's death was a necessary part of the plan. Because he was a ninja, he would have to perish with the rest of that bloodthirsty, power-hungry lot.

"Power-hungry..." Hikaru whispered, realizing that was the key. If one Kage had decided to try to tap the might of a demon, then surely at least one other had also succumbed to the temptation such power offered. Hikaru still had several villages to visit, and he would almost certainly find another like Gaara, a child who could understand the Sand ninja's pain, and lead him to a modicum of happiness.

I will find that child, Hikaru swore, his fists clenching unconsciously, and I will bring you together. You deserve at least that much relief from the torment these ninjas have put you through.

Comforted by this resolve, Hikaru folded his hands in front of his chest. Summoning the power that coursed through the very air that surrounded him, he whispered, "Embrace me, Mother... return me to your bosom."

For a moment, nothing happened, but then Hikaru felt the desert giving way beneath his feet, grains of sand slipping aside to let him pass. Within moments he had sunk to his hips, then his chest, then his chin. He opened his mouth to let the dust into his mouth, breathing it into his lungs, where it served him just as well as air.

Then, as his head disappeared beneath the surface of the Wind Country desert, Hikaru's pace truly began to pick up. He sank, passing through dirt and rock as if they were air, descending towards the glowing warmth of the lower crust.

For a while, at least, he was going home.


The mist, Sakura decided, was definitely going to ruin her hair. She'd gotten up early to prepare, so she'd look her best for Sasuke on their day off, but then that pervert Kakashi had ruined everything by insisting that they head out into the fog for training. She'd hoped to have quality time with her boyfriend while old man Tazuna made a few extra coins helping the villagers build their new bridge, but now she'd be wasting a whole day with Kakashi and Naruto. And the humidity was wreaking havoc on her hair, turning it into a limp, lifeless mess.

This near the border of Fire Country, the Nation of Plains actually had quite a few trees, mostly growing in clumps along the banks of the river that flowed through the tiny village. Kakashi had led the team into one of these copses, where thin tendrils of fog drifted over the roots in the cool, moist morning air. "Here," he announced as his students settled into a sullen line, "is where we will train."

"What kind of training?" Naruto asked brightly, ever enthusiastic to learn more 'incredible' things. Sakura resisted the urge to smack him for being so peppy.

"Tree climbing!" Kakashi replied with a smile.

What? Sakura shrieked internally, I'm ruining my hair for that?

"But sensei! I already know how to climb trees!" Naruto protested, and Sakura couldn't help but agree.

"But can you climb them like this?" Kakashi asked, then turned on his heel and walked calmly towards one of the larger trees. When he reached it, he continued to walk, without adjusting his pace, straight up the side of the tree, then along the underside of one of the larger branches. "I intend to teach you this," he explained, dangling upside down from the branch.

"Wow! Cool!" Naruto shouted.

"It's a simple trick," Sasuke said calmly, evidently unimpressed by Kakashi's feat. "Focus your chakra on your feet, and use it to hold them to the tree. There's very little technique involved."

"Quite right," Kakashi said, "but mastering this skill requires good chakra control. That is very important for young ninjas such as yourselves. At your present skill level, you will almost always face ninjas who have more chakra than you, so you will not survive if you cannot use what you have efficiently."

"Okay!" Naruto shouted. "I'm gonna do this!"

"Since you're just starting out," Kakashi said, "you should try to take it at a run. Use a kunai to mark your progress." He dropped from the branch, flipping in midair to land on his feet. "I'll come back in a while to see how you're doing."

Sakura nodded and pulled out her kunai. Chakra control, huh? she thought, eyeing the tree Kakashi had just jumped out of, that's something I'm already good at. She glanced at Sasuke, adding, Now's my chance to show him what I can do!

Sakura took a deep breath and cleared her mind, willing her spiritual energy to pool in her feet. Almost immediately, she felt her soles tingling with the power she had directed there, felt the stiff grass bend beneath her sandals as the chakra added to her grip on the ground. Taking a deep breath, Sakura charged towards the tree, using her last step off the dirt to adjust her angle so that her first step against the bole didn't send her flying across the clearing. The bark creaked beneath her feet, but didn't peel or splinter, so she continued to run until the prickly feeling started to wear off. Then she grabbed a branch and swung herself onto it, her feet dangling more than 20 yards off the ground.

With a smirk, Sakura glanced back at the other two members of her team. Naruto was lying on the ground, a bump growing on his head. He noticed her at almost the same moment that she noticed him, and said, "Wow! Sakura-chan's awesome!"

Sakura shrugged off the praise—after all, she didn't care what Naruto thought of her—and scanned the area for Sasuke. It took a moment before she spotted him on a nearby tree, sitting on a branch only a few yards below her own, staring at her expressionlessly. Oh no, Sakura thought, did I make him mad by doing too well?

But then Sasuke smirked and said, "I'm impressed, Sakura-chan... who knew you were so capable?"

As Sakura felt tingles in someplace other than her feet, she decided that ruined hair or no, this training was definitely worthwhile.


Five yards up the tree, a horizontal line had been gouged in the bark.

Naruto stared at it as he lay below, the tree's roots digging into his aching body. He had worked all day at climbing the tree like Kakashi-sensei, and he had only gotten five lousy yards.

Somewhere above him, Naruto could hear the rustling of branches as Sasuke and Sakura dashed up the trees. They'd long ago gotten too high up for Naruto to see them, and by now were probably almost reaching the top. And he... he was still stuck at the bottom.

"Yo!" Kakashi called, suddenly appearing in a burst of smoke. Naruto sat up, glaring at him. If only Kakashi had actually explained how to do this, he might have had a chance at catching up. But Sakura was really smart, and Sasuke had his whole family to help, so Naruto had been too far behind from the beginning.

He was starting to think he'd never catch up.

"Sasuke, Sakura, you two come down now!" Kakashi shouted, and a moment later Naruto's teammates showed up, jumping gracefully down from their respective trees. They looked sweaty and tired, but not much the worse for wear. They had nothing like Naruto's array of bumps, bruises, and dirt stains.

"Good!" Kakashi said, "It seems like Sasuke and Sakura have learned this technique adequately. I guess that means that Naruto's still dead last."

"Well, it always takes Naruto a while to catch on," Sakura said cheerfully. "But with you helping, I'm sure he'll catch up in a month or two!"

On some level, Naruto understood that Sakura had intended this as a positive comment, but coming as it did only a few moments after hearing Kakashi-sensei use the words the blonde hated more than anything, it was too much to take. "Shut up!" he shouted, jumping to his feet despite the complaints of his overtaxed body. "I don't need anybody's help! I'll learn this myself, and I'll do it before we get the old man back to Wave Country!"

Sakura visibly flinched at the outburst, but Sasuke merely snorted. "You won't get anywhere with that attitude, dunce," he drawled, smirking. "Chakra control requires a clear, focused mind... a steep order for someone who doesn't seem to have any mind at all." He straightened up his clothes and added, "I'm going back to town. Coming, Sakura?"

"Yeah," the girl replied, but then stopped. "Oh," she groaned, "I left my kunai up there."

"I'll get it," Sasuke said quickly, then dashed up her tree.

Show-off, Naruto thought, turning his back on the little scene. He glared at the stupid line and formed his hands into a seal. He was about to get started when he heard Sasuke drop back onto the ground and say, "Here."

"Oh thank you, Sasuke," Sakura said, her voice dripping sweetness.

Stupid Sasuke, Naruto grumbled mentally, still steaming from what the other boy had said. As he thought over Sasuke's words, however, Naruto realized that the jerk had let something slip. "A clear, focused mind, huh?" Naruto muttered, "So that's your secret." He closed his eyes and calmed himself, trying to think only about the tree, about getting up to the top. He almost lost his concentration when he felt a prickly feeling on the soles of his feet, but managed to hang on as he started running.

For a few glorious moments, Naruto felt himself scaling the tree, and thought I'm doing it! At that instant, however, he felt his feet start skidding down the bark. In a move that had become almost second nature, he struck out with his kunai and twisted himself around in midair so as to land on his feet.

As he touched the ground, Naruto's exhausted legs gave out and he sat down hard on his ass. He barely noticed, however, for his eyes were focused on a fresh gash in the bark, just starting to ooze sap, three yards above his previous maximum.

"Yeah!" Naruto shouted. "See, Sasuke! I can do it!" He turned to gloat, and only then realized that all the others had already left for the village. "I'll show you," Naruto growled in the direction they'd gone, "I'm not gonna let Sasuke outdo me ever again!"


The road crossed the border of Fire Country at Kusaho village, a small town with poor defenses. Its low, thin palisade might have been ample deterrent for random bandits, but Sasuke estimated a determined ninja squad could enter the hamlet and wreaking utter havoc in a matter of seconds. Even his own team could have managed it, if they weren't saddled with the old man and the boy.

Sasuke spared their charges a sidelong glance, inwardly fuming at how long this second phase of their mission was taking. If Kakashi had just declined, he could be back at home right now, training and spending time with Itachi rather than wasting his time rehashing techniques he'd learned when he was nine. Granted, the extra practice hadn't been entirely unneeded, and the competition with Sakura (really, who could have imagined she had such fantastic control?) had been a diverting way to spend an afternoon. But otherwise he'd not benefited at all from the mission. Even worse, the old man and boy moved so slowly it would probably take another two weeks or more to cross Fire Country and get them home.

I'll bet the old guy asks to stop, Sasuke thought as the little party passed through the gate into Kusaho, even though we could still press on for two hours or so before camping.

His expectations were almost immediately fulfilled as Tazuna said, "Ah, this is a good place to spend the night, and my feet are weary. Let's stop here so we can sleep in real beds."

"Very well," Kakashi said calmly, though his eye twitched ever so slightly. Perhaps he, too was regretting taking this mission.

Naruto, standing calmly at Kakashi's side, merely shrugged. He'd been very subdued ever since the day they'd spent tree-climbing. During the day, as they trudged along effortlessly next to Tazuna and Inari, Naruto was almost completely silent. At night, he usually set himself up on the edge of their campsite, far from everyone else, and went promptly to sleep. For the only time in as long as Sasuke had known Naruto, he could close his eyes and really believe that the blonde wasn't there.

Not that Sasuke minded, of course... this arrangement meant that he could fool around with Sakura for a while each evening without having to worry that Naruto would notice or interrupt. Still, the discussions he'd had with Kakashi and Sakura about the blonde percolated uncomfortably in Sasuke's head during the near-silent, monotonous days of walking. He wondered if he'd gone too far that day among the trees, if he'd opened a rift in the team that wasn't going to close.

Still, Sasuke couldn't have given Naruto a hint any other way... not without injuring the blonde's pride, or losing face in front of Sakura. Hell, if Sasuke had been friendly about it, Naruto probably wouldn't have believed him.

Sasuke's musings were interrupted by the a delicate cough coming from one of the buildings. Turning towards the sound, Sasuke saw a pale-skinned man with white hair and slightly pink eyes walking out of a dilapidated restaurant. His posture was relaxed, but he was dressed in the ninja style, and a Hidden Cloud forehead protector was wrapped around his waist.

"Excuse me," the newcomer said, "but are you Hidden Leaf ninjas?"

"Yes," Kakashi said, his eyes narrowing as he tensed very slightly. Sasuke caught his sensei's change in attitude and also shifted his posture, moving his feet so that he could easily adopt a defensive stance if necessary. Naruto and Sakura, however, did nothing.

The albino also did not respond, saying, "I would like to request an escort to Wave Country."

"Why?"

"Well, I intend to catch a ship from the Wave Country to Water Country. However, the truce between our villages stipulates that I must be escorted by Leaf Ninjas while in Fire Country. I intended to send a message to Konoha tomorrow to request a chaperone, but if you are bound for your village, or for Wave Country, then it would be simpler to just join you, no?"

Kakashi relaxed slightly and nodded. "I suppose that is acceptable," he said, "and we are bound for Wave Country after all. I must insist that you remain in my view at all times, but if you are amenable to this, then you may join us."

"I have no objection," the albino replied. "I suppose I should introduce myself, then. I am Nomuchi Kazuki, of Hidden-in-the-Clouds village. You are already known to me, Hatake Kakashi-san... I suppose these children are your subordinates?"

Sasuke bristled at being called a child, but kept himself outwardly calm. Reacting to the mild insult would only confirm Kazuki's opinion. To his surprise, Naruto didn't react either. Sakura looked like she was about to say something, but she was prevented from doing so by Tazuna.

"Let's save the introductions for elsewhere!" the old man interjected. "I'm parched, and my feet ache. We should trade names over sake and a solid meal."

"That place should satisfy," Kazuki replied, tilting his head towards the restaurant, "the food is passable, the sake good, and I believe they even have milk for the little ones."

Kakashi nodded, and the little troop filed out of the street and into the tiny establishment. As he stepped into the dingy building, Sasuke suppressed a sigh. This mission was miserable enough already... adding this jerk was not going to improve things.


Kakashi came awake instantly, opening his eyes and tensing himself to attack without otherwise changing his position. Keeping his breathing slow and even, the jounin scanned the small clearing where the traveling party had made camp, first checking to see that the Cloud Ninja was where he should be. Seeing the albino stretched out close to the dying fire, Kakashi next checked on the old man and the kid. They, too, were where they should be; curled up in their sleeping bags only a few feet away.

In sleep, the kid looked less sullen, less drawn. During the day his expression barely wavered from a grumpy scowl that made him seem more like an old man than a boy, but in slumber the angry lines smoothed out. He looked peaceful, almost happy in the dim pre-dawn light.

Kakashi discarded the line of thought and continued to scan the clearing as best he could without moving his head. He'd planned ahead, of course, and bedded down in a spot that allowed him just such a view. So he could see that Sakura was still asleep, and Sasuke was sitting next to the campfire. He'd need a reprimand, Kakashi decided—fires were bad for night vision, and this one had apparently left Sasuke deaf to whatever noise had awakened Kakashi.

Finally Kakashi glanced over to Naruto's spot, fully expecting to see the boy there. It had become increasingly hard to wake him in the mornings the past few days, so the jounin expected to see him curled up beneath his blanket. But while the blanket appeared to have been there for a while, Naruto was just now emerging from the forest, a branch still swinging behind him.

To his credit, the blonde seemed to have realized he'd made a noise, and was crouched, completely still, a few feet from his blanket. In the pale glow of the early morning, Kakashi could see a number of bruises that hadn't been there the previous night.

He's been training, Kakashi realized, and a whole number of oddities fell into sudden focus. Naruto's hard mornings, his subdued behavior, his willingness to take a sleeping spot far from the fire... a great deal made sense very quickly. Naruto had done a good job of hiding it, though; if Kakashi hadn't been more alert because of Kazuki's presence, he might never have noticed. Kakashi remembered Iruka's words—how Naruto tended to improve by focusing on one thing to the exclusion of everything else—and decided a lesson was in order for both of his male students.

"Good morning Naruto," Kakashi called, and both boys jumped. Naruto toppled out of his crouch, and Sasuke leaped to his feet, spinning around to face Kakashi so quickly that he nearly fell over, too. "It's good of you to test Sasuke's skill as a watchman," Kakashi continued, tossing aside his blanket and stretching. "I suppose it's safe to say that if you were a less friendly ninja, we would all be dead by now."

"Er..." Naruto gurgled, as Sasuke blushed in embarrassment. Kakashi noted the reaction, deciding that Naruto would be more useful in goading Sasuke on than Sakura would. Certainly Sasuke hadn't blushed when the girl outdid him in training.

Kakashi stood and explained, "The fire makes us more comfortable, but it produces too much ambient light. That makes it harder for you to see enemies moving beyond the edge of camp. Additionally, it makes you a much easier target for them, by lighting you up. Not to mention that the noise from the burning can occasionally block out other, more important noises, such as the rustling of that little branch."

Sasuke shook himself out of his embarrassment, glared at Naruto, and replied, "Yes, sensei. I'll remember."

"Good," Kakashi said, "Consider taking a position in the trees next time. It will afford you a better view." He then walked over to Naruto and helped him to his feet. Speaking so that only the blonde could hear him, he said, "You are to stop this at once."

"Stop what?" Naruto asked, trying to manage an innocent smile. He deflated when Kakashi glared at him, though, and said, "Sensei, I..."

"I know that you want to live up to my expectations, but if you overtax yourself by training every night, you'll wind up dead in a real battle."

"But..."

"Don't start," Kakashi said sharply. "I know it doesn't take much effort to trudge along behind the little kid and the old man, but now we're escorting a foreign ninja, too. He says he means no harm, and his village has a truce with ours. We cannot trust to that, however... we must be prepared for him to betray us at any moment. So unless we stop somewhere for a few days, I want you to be sleeping every moment of the night that you're not on watch. Understand?"

"Yes, sensei," Naruto replied sullenly.

Kakashi nodded and turned around. "Of course, if we do stop," he added as he walked towards the campfire, "I want you to continue as before."

This time, Naruto's affirmative reply sounded much more sincere.


"I believe I've talked to you about this already," Kakashi said, as Naruto felt a hand grab his shoulder. He hadn't even gotten to the edge of the clearing before the jounin noticed him.

"It... it's not that!" Naruto protested, "I just..."

"You went to the bathroom before dinner."

"It... it's not that either," Naruto murmured, his face heating up. Please don't make me say it, he thought, It's so embarrassing...

"Well then, what? You're not sick, are you?"

Not that way, Naruto thought, steeling himself for what he was about to do. "I..." he whispered, "It's been a couple weeks since I've... you know... and I don't wanna... in my blanket..." Naruto was glad it was dark, because he was sure his face had turned purple with the shame.

"Ah," Kakashi said. "I guess you are at that age... and it would be inconvenient to have that kind of accident out in the wilderness."

Naruto shuddered as he imagined having to explain such a thing to Sakura... or that brat Inari. He didn't even want to think about what Sasuke would say if he had a wet dream.

"Well," Kakashi said, "it's okay then. But don't be too long, or I'll come get you." He released Naruto's shoulder and added, "If you want, I have something that might stimulate your imagination."

"N-n-n-no thanks!" Naruto said, waving his hands frantically in refusal, "I'll just... take care of myself." He ran into the woods before Kakashi could get any more insistent. Jerking off was one thing... reading those perverted books was something else.

Mindful of his sensei's warning, Naruto only went about a hundred yards into the woods before slumping down at the base of a tree and pulling down his pants. Despite the chilly air, he got to work, and closed his eyes so he could envision something interesting.

Naruto started by imagining Sakura, naked like some of the women he'd seen in the dirty magazine. The thought didn't thrill him at all, though, so he tried to imagine her telling him she loved him, kissing him, and doing with her hand what he was doing with his. Naruto's mind rebelled, though... the whole thing was just too implausible to satisfy even his hormone-addled mind.

Naruto tried to think of other girls he knew... Ino, Yuko, Madoka... and finally felt something stir when he imagined Hinata as the one handling him. As soon as he brought her to mind, however, her black hair grew longer, her pale skin darkened, and the tiny mounds of her breasts flattened into a harder plane of muscle. And then Naruto's mind provided a vision of Shikamaru, lying naked in Naruto's apartment, the golden afternoon sun illuminating his nude body.

Naruto's orgasm was sharp, fast, and barely pleasant. "Fuck," he gasped as he wiped his hand off on some leaves. "Fuck fuck fuck," he chanted, pulling up his pants. Tears stung his eyes, and he angrily rubbed them away, trying to regain his composure. Finally, after taking a few deep breaths, he felt calm enough to return to camp without provoking too many undesired questions.

Yet he couldn't help but ask himself, What's wrong with me?