"Why," Harry thought for the umpteenth time that summer, "He was so young; it can't have been his time."
As every other time however, there was no answer and it led to him lying on his stomach, grieving in an unhealthy way. With no one to talk to on Privet Drive and his friends owls closely monitored, he felt completely alone.
This of course was not the case, as the abhorred Dursley's would have him think. The truth however, that his friends were off together in an undisclosed (at least to him) location and it hurt even worse this summer than the last.
The first letter he received from either of his friends this summer came from Hermione upon her arrival at where ever it was that they were. He didn't remember its exact phrasing, it did how ever go something like:
Harry,
How are you feeling? I know you're probably beating yourself up over what happened at the ministry still. Just remember should you ever need to talk, I am here, never forget that, please Harry. Never forget that. On happier note however, you'll be pleased to note that Ron and I have been getting along much better of late. He's been much more open-minded and much less argumentative. I am proud of him. I am talking to the order as often as possible about you arrival here, they don't seem to be too keen to give any information at this point. Keep your spirits up Harry, Sirius wouldn't want you to be unhappy for too long.
With love,
Hermione
He didn't feel the rage he had last summer over his lack of information. In fact, the only emotion he had truly felt lately had been sorrow. No he was not angry at Ron or Hermione at all, as they probably believed after last years coming together at Grimmauld place.
While he felt hurt at his absence in his friends presence, he wasn't even sure he wanted to join them. His mood wouldn't help anyone he was around and he wasn't in any particularly sharing mood with his feelings. What did help him however, were the Dursley's, surprisingly enough. His uncle and cousin completely acted as if he didn't exist, Petunia however brought him food from their meal (large portions as well).
Her sudden kindness was most likely brought on by the orders threats. He was grateful for that at least though, he thought as he paced his room. He was at ends all the time trying to keep himself occupied.
A good means of this, he realized, was to write to a more impartial crowd. After his first letter from Ginny Weasley he began to think often of the attractive red-headed girl. Being only a year younger than he, he began to see her in a whole new light. Appreciating her womanly curves more than he had realized.
But then there was Hermione. He often wondered about her, and her connection to Ron. It seemed that the two had more pent up frustration than any two people he had previously known (the selection of those people are very limited, however). Since last year she seemed to have out-grown her book worm-ish behavior and adapted a more … flirty attitude towards him.
All in all, other than Sirius, he found himself wondering about his opposite sex quite a lot. And often times it was thinking of uncertainty. He never believed all those things he heard about girls being confusing, until now. Now however, girls seemed more foreign to him than Potions or Divination.
I need your arms around
me, I need to feel your touch
I need your understanding, I need
your love so much
You tell me that you love me so, you tell me
that you care
But when I need you baby, you're never there
On
the phone long, long distance
Always through such strong
resistance
First you say you're too busy
I wonder if you even
miss me
Never there
You're never there
You're never,
ever, ever, ever there
A golden bird that flies away, a
candle's fickle flame
To think I held you yesterday, your love
was just a game
A golden bird that flies away, a candle's fickle
flame
To think I held you yesterday, your love was just a
game
You tell me that you love me so, you tell me that you
care
But when I need you baby
Take the time to get to know
me
If you want me why can't you just show me
We're always
on this roller coaster
If you want me why can't you get closer?
Never there
You're never there
You're never ever
ever ever there
Cake
