Lara Crofts Journey : AOD
Chapter Two: Parisian Back Streets
A/N There are two sets of lara, Controlled Voice Lara (ex CVLara- blah blah) that is the lara that talks automatically, and tells you stuff that you need to know. The regular Lara, which you control in the game that only makes grunting noises, is plainly Lara (ex Lara- blah blah blah ) hope thats not confusing, enjoy! oh and even though there are no reviews yet, I'll still write...BWHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Here it is:
We last left off...you know nevermind, just read :D
Lara stood there, in the same spot...right next to the candy bar on the floor.
Lara-Should I pick it up?..._ It might be dirty...it is on the floor, opened and stuff...well uh ....:: thinks :: :: picks up candy bar ::
She looked around for a while, sees (okay and im sorry for mixing the kind of writing tenses, like furture past present...i just cant choose on one :D ) a bin, and walks towards it.
CVLara-That bin looks climbable.
Lara-Whoa...that needs to stop. I dont even get a warning or anything _ ugh...well whatever :: continues walking to bin ::
CVLara-Stop at the bin, press the up cursor key--
Lara-Gawd, I hate this.
Five Hours Later
CVLara-Now jump and press the action button to grab the ledge.
Lara-WHAT IF YOU DONT KNOW WHERE IT IS?!?!?!
CVLara-Well then you're screwed...:: cough :: I mean...ugh?
Lara-O_O
Lara decides to jump anyway...remember that cheat I talked about in the last chapter? Well it also included having all of the upgrades (and I really do have that!!! :D ) and she made the jump.
Lara walked for a little, found a litle path to a pipe and then--
CVLara-I can hop to the other side.
Lara-AHHHHHHHHH!!!! :: pulls out hair ::
INTERMISSION
We'll be back soon.
Lara-Okay...and we're back!
Lara jumped to where the pipe thing was, climbed it, shimmyed ( did I spell that right...ah well ) all the way to the opening in/on the roof of the building and climbed up.
CVLara-Great, I cant waste time, I need to get to...Cara...Caravan....Cardios....ugh!...Carvier's appartment!.
Lara-What a twit.
CVLara-You shut up.
Lara-Whatever
CVLara-Dont sass me young lady.
Lara:: sticks tongue out ::little english twit.
CVLara-Yeaaaargh!
Lara-Banana!
CVLara-Ugh...
Later Lara found a crowbar and went to back to a little shed on the roof top and uses the crowbar to open it.
CVLara-I feel stronger now.
Lara-Omg! Stop! :: looks around :: people are gonna think I'm a looney!
CVLara-I wanna be the smart bunny
Lara-Dammit, not that kinda of looney!
CVLara-No ones here anyway, midget!
Lara-Fuzzbutt!
CVLara-OOOOOH, how mature, leave me alone alreday.
**********LATER*********
Lara found a gun and went back to where she found the crowbar, at a little ledgy thingy.
CVLara- I need to shimmy--::lara slaps herself, slapping CVLara ::
Lara-Stop it! I'm just gonna do a sprint-jump, K? Little Crangowa.
CVLara-GASP!!!
Lara-Heh, yeah :: flips hair ::
Lara breaths in and out, then performs the sprint-jump.
Lara-:: jumping :: YEEEEEEE HAW!!!
CVLara-NOOOOO!!! You jumped over my talking spot! :: thinks about it :: I NEED TO MOVE QUIETLY! PRESS THE STEAL-- :: lands ::
Lara-I'm here, okay so I need to check if anyones here...what the hell, I know already!
Lara-Hmm...I suppose I could try to slowly gang up on the guy...or...:: thinks ::
Two Minutes Later
Guy-Man, I hate this!...I didnt know that MLLE Carve...Caragan...uh Carvier was alergic to deordant!...Damn this "time-out"!!! :: sigh :: AND I have to hold her gun, what the hell?! Its not like I'm gonna need it, no one will ever look for someone as dangeriously-looking-yet-not-dangerious-at-all as me. ack! _!!!
But what Guy (and that IS his name) didnt know was that Lady Lara Croft was watching him...talking to himself...oh and that she thought that he thought that Lara Croft was a bad person and had to be arested or shot, even though he had no idea about her. He thought Lara Croft was some kind of bra or mongoose breeding company.
OH yeah, so Lara watched him...the loook in her eyes like "chikka ban choo chikka chikaa Shaaa!!" After a bit, she did a side flip/jump, pulled out her guns and....and...
CVLara-I cannot jump and shoot at the same time nitwit!
Lara-OH yeah, taken out of the game...wait what?!
Since she had all upgrades from the cheat code, the jump was too powerful and she flipped over a rail, fell to the ground, and became a "rag doll" all weridly dying and stuff. Her legs and arms limbless...just plain gross.
CVLara-GAME OVER
Lara-I know that dammit, stupid life gage...damn you life gage, DAMN YOU!!!
Big letters appear but turn small, which wiggs out lara.
GAme OVer....
Lara-Okay...well :: looks around :: what now?
CVLara-Since you didnt save, you have to start over.
Lara-AWW! :: slaps self ::
CVLara-Ow
Lara-Whatever :: starts over:: dammit...
Picture pops up "Parisian Back Streets"
Ten hours Later
CVLara-Why cant you do it right?!
Lara-What?! You keep saying "press the left cursor key to get off the top" of the ladder, Look! :: mentally presses right cursor key :: See!!
CVLara-You nitwit! Thats RIGHT!!! Not LEFT!!!
Another Ten hours later
CVLara-V-A-U-L-T over the rail, stop trying to swan dive!
Lara-:: rolls eyes ::
Another Ten hours later
CVLara-I bet they stopped looking for you already--
Lara-Shut up! Okay, so now I'm at the place where I died, well where I did the stupid side flip and fell onto the smelly Paraisian Back Streets. The guy is still talking to himself, and well now I'm gonna do this right.
CVLara-Hah!
Lara-You shut up, and dont talk to me right now.
Lara slowly approached Guy and "pressed" the action button mentally, making her spin Guy around, throw him on the floor and--
Lara-Ahh, stop squirming! Just--No! Sto--will you?!--Argh, STOP MOVING YOUR HEAD!!! Ah--Just, No, Stop--AHH!! :: punches him in the face ::
Guy-:: blinks to death ::
Von Croy-AWWWWWW
Lara-Quiet you, you're dead.
Von Croy-:: dies ::
Lara-Okay so that um...was pointless, well whatever :: picks up key for gate ::
She walked over to the gate, unlocks and opens it, then places herself on the ladder next to it.
CVLara-Have to get to Carvier's Appartment!
Lara-Quiet dammit! You already said that! Ugh...ahh! Why cant I move down?! ( once again, PC game AOD makes more sense in this part, it has a bug of "no moving down on some ladders" or "no moving at all", but but sometimes you can move up :D ) Its that damned bug, Y2Lake or summfin, whatever that means.
CVLara-Just let go already.
Lara-Im scared though.
CVLara-Comeon! You once faced the erm..face of Set!
Lara-o_o
CVLara-You know, the GOD, the one that nearly killed you while you were still in his temple...come on! You just came back from doing all this stuff related to it!
Lara-Nope, dont recal. but fine, I'll let go. :: lets go :: :: falls :: AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! :: hits floor and dies :: but since she hit the "level loading" spot, the next level loads anyway.
CVLara-dammit.
End of Chapter.
MUAHAHAHAHAHA! Well hoped you enjoyed it...I wrote this while in testing for the Southern California state thingy, hee hee :D
Stay tuned for next chapter :D
Next Chapter:
That appartment place.
Chapter Two: Parisian Back Streets
A/N There are two sets of lara, Controlled Voice Lara (ex CVLara- blah blah) that is the lara that talks automatically, and tells you stuff that you need to know. The regular Lara, which you control in the game that only makes grunting noises, is plainly Lara (ex Lara- blah blah blah ) hope thats not confusing, enjoy! oh and even though there are no reviews yet, I'll still write...BWHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Here it is:
We last left off...you know nevermind, just read :D
Lara stood there, in the same spot...right next to the candy bar on the floor.
Lara-Should I pick it up?..._ It might be dirty...it is on the floor, opened and stuff...well uh ....:: thinks :: :: picks up candy bar ::
She looked around for a while, sees (okay and im sorry for mixing the kind of writing tenses, like furture past present...i just cant choose on one :D ) a bin, and walks towards it.
CVLara-That bin looks climbable.
Lara-Whoa...that needs to stop. I dont even get a warning or anything _ ugh...well whatever :: continues walking to bin ::
CVLara-Stop at the bin, press the up cursor key--
Lara-Gawd, I hate this.
Five Hours Later
CVLara-Now jump and press the action button to grab the ledge.
Lara-WHAT IF YOU DONT KNOW WHERE IT IS?!?!?!
CVLara-Well then you're screwed...:: cough :: I mean...ugh?
Lara-O_O
Lara decides to jump anyway...remember that cheat I talked about in the last chapter? Well it also included having all of the upgrades (and I really do have that!!! :D ) and she made the jump.
Lara walked for a little, found a litle path to a pipe and then--
CVLara-I can hop to the other side.
Lara-AHHHHHHHHH!!!! :: pulls out hair ::
INTERMISSION
We'll be back soon.
Lara-Okay...and we're back!
Lara jumped to where the pipe thing was, climbed it, shimmyed ( did I spell that right...ah well ) all the way to the opening in/on the roof of the building and climbed up.
CVLara-Great, I cant waste time, I need to get to...Cara...Caravan....Cardios....ugh!...Carvier's appartment!.
Lara-What a twit.
CVLara-You shut up.
Lara-Whatever
CVLara-Dont sass me young lady.
Lara:: sticks tongue out ::little english twit.
CVLara-Yeaaaargh!
Lara-Banana!
CVLara-Ugh...
Later Lara found a crowbar and went to back to a little shed on the roof top and uses the crowbar to open it.
CVLara-I feel stronger now.
Lara-Omg! Stop! :: looks around :: people are gonna think I'm a looney!
CVLara-I wanna be the smart bunny
Lara-Dammit, not that kinda of looney!
CVLara-No ones here anyway, midget!
Lara-Fuzzbutt!
CVLara-OOOOOH, how mature, leave me alone alreday.
**********LATER*********
Lara found a gun and went back to where she found the crowbar, at a little ledgy thingy.
CVLara- I need to shimmy--::lara slaps herself, slapping CVLara ::
Lara-Stop it! I'm just gonna do a sprint-jump, K? Little Crangowa.
CVLara-GASP!!!
Lara-Heh, yeah :: flips hair ::
Lara breaths in and out, then performs the sprint-jump.
Lara-:: jumping :: YEEEEEEE HAW!!!
CVLara-NOOOOO!!! You jumped over my talking spot! :: thinks about it :: I NEED TO MOVE QUIETLY! PRESS THE STEAL-- :: lands ::
Lara-I'm here, okay so I need to check if anyones here...what the hell, I know already!
Lara-Hmm...I suppose I could try to slowly gang up on the guy...or...:: thinks ::
Two Minutes Later
Guy-Man, I hate this!...I didnt know that MLLE Carve...Caragan...uh Carvier was alergic to deordant!...Damn this "time-out"!!! :: sigh :: AND I have to hold her gun, what the hell?! Its not like I'm gonna need it, no one will ever look for someone as dangeriously-looking-yet-not-dangerious-at-all as me. ack! _!!!
But what Guy (and that IS his name) didnt know was that Lady Lara Croft was watching him...talking to himself...oh and that she thought that he thought that Lara Croft was a bad person and had to be arested or shot, even though he had no idea about her. He thought Lara Croft was some kind of bra or mongoose breeding company.
OH yeah, so Lara watched him...the loook in her eyes like "chikka ban choo chikka chikaa Shaaa!!" After a bit, she did a side flip/jump, pulled out her guns and....and...
CVLara-I cannot jump and shoot at the same time nitwit!
Lara-OH yeah, taken out of the game...wait what?!
Since she had all upgrades from the cheat code, the jump was too powerful and she flipped over a rail, fell to the ground, and became a "rag doll" all weridly dying and stuff. Her legs and arms limbless...just plain gross.
CVLara-GAME OVER
Lara-I know that dammit, stupid life gage...damn you life gage, DAMN YOU!!!
Big letters appear but turn small, which wiggs out lara.
GAme OVer....
Lara-Okay...well :: looks around :: what now?
CVLara-Since you didnt save, you have to start over.
Lara-AWW! :: slaps self ::
CVLara-Ow
Lara-Whatever :: starts over:: dammit...
Picture pops up "Parisian Back Streets"
Ten hours Later
CVLara-Why cant you do it right?!
Lara-What?! You keep saying "press the left cursor key to get off the top" of the ladder, Look! :: mentally presses right cursor key :: See!!
CVLara-You nitwit! Thats RIGHT!!! Not LEFT!!!
Another Ten hours later
CVLara-V-A-U-L-T over the rail, stop trying to swan dive!
Lara-:: rolls eyes ::
Another Ten hours later
CVLara-I bet they stopped looking for you already--
Lara-Shut up! Okay, so now I'm at the place where I died, well where I did the stupid side flip and fell onto the smelly Paraisian Back Streets. The guy is still talking to himself, and well now I'm gonna do this right.
CVLara-Hah!
Lara-You shut up, and dont talk to me right now.
Lara slowly approached Guy and "pressed" the action button mentally, making her spin Guy around, throw him on the floor and--
Lara-Ahh, stop squirming! Just--No! Sto--will you?!--Argh, STOP MOVING YOUR HEAD!!! Ah--Just, No, Stop--AHH!! :: punches him in the face ::
Guy-:: blinks to death ::
Von Croy-AWWWWWW
Lara-Quiet you, you're dead.
Von Croy-:: dies ::
Lara-Okay so that um...was pointless, well whatever :: picks up key for gate ::
She walked over to the gate, unlocks and opens it, then places herself on the ladder next to it.
CVLara-Have to get to Carvier's Appartment!
Lara-Quiet dammit! You already said that! Ugh...ahh! Why cant I move down?! ( once again, PC game AOD makes more sense in this part, it has a bug of "no moving down on some ladders" or "no moving at all", but but sometimes you can move up :D ) Its that damned bug, Y2Lake or summfin, whatever that means.
CVLara-Just let go already.
Lara-Im scared though.
CVLara-Comeon! You once faced the erm..face of Set!
Lara-o_o
CVLara-You know, the GOD, the one that nearly killed you while you were still in his temple...come on! You just came back from doing all this stuff related to it!
Lara-Nope, dont recal. but fine, I'll let go. :: lets go :: :: falls :: AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! :: hits floor and dies :: but since she hit the "level loading" spot, the next level loads anyway.
CVLara-dammit.
End of Chapter.
MUAHAHAHAHAHA! Well hoped you enjoyed it...I wrote this while in testing for the Southern California state thingy, hee hee :D
Stay tuned for next chapter :D
Next Chapter:
That appartment place.
