Written in Blood
By: K-c

A/N: So . . .here's chappie 2. I'm glad the first one didn't suck royally. I was kinda nervous about putting it up online in the first place! Well, i'm glad you guys could bear with me. This is, after all, my first FMA fic. Well, here ya go!

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters in FMA . . .if I DID, however, Ed would wear a pink dress, Al would be a butler, and Mustang would be a chef . . .Ah, imagination . . .

Ch.2: Silence to Love, Silence to Hate

Winry's POV:

"What's wrong?"

I looked up from staring at the sidewalk I was standing on, at Ed who was staring at me curiously, his gold eyes reflecting the moonlight. He was standing right beside me, and yet we were so far away from each other. No matter how many times I told myself that this wasn't a dream, I still expected to wake up any minute. What are the chances of finding each other like this, anyway? It's so impossible to be true. Two years . . .is a long time . . .too long . . .a gap of emptiness to forget everything what happened between the two of us. I felt like we were finally gaining a relationship maybe more than friendship those two years ago and then it all fell apart. Now I feel like we're starting all over again and meeting each other for the first time without any memories to reflect back on. It's almost like all of our memories were erased from our minds and we're left to get to know each other again. Even though he made it obvious that he had been thinking about me a lot, what was I to him? An image? A figment of his imagination? Nothing real, nothing concrete, nothing to hold him and tell him everything's all right. Where was I when he needed me?

I nodded my head slightly, not really remembering what he had asked me in the first place. The thoughts running through my head seemed to muddle my surroundings and I kept getting lost. Ed gave me a look of suspicion and disbelief, his golden eyes seeing right through my lies, but turned to face the house again and stared up at the dark windows. I gazed at his face as he studied every detail and I waited for him to put the puzzle pieces together. I held my breath in advance.

"Where's Grandmother Pinako?" he asked the question I knew was going to roll off of his tongue any minute. My eyes immediately welled with tears as the few moments of silence that we shared followed his inquiry. Now knowing that this was what had been going through my mind he tried to look me in the eyes again. I turned away from him, desperate to hide my tears from him. It was useless, however, as they began to stream down my face.

"I heard from someone . . .last year . . . that she died . . ." I mumbled and held baited breath for his reaction. It wasn't what I had expected it to be, which was fury and anguish, but it was more of an unemotional reaction. I turned back to face him and saw that his eyes were averted to the ground and his face unreadable which seemed to be his new favourite expression. He did not say a word, did not shed a tear, did not clench his fists like he always did when he got angry. He just stared at the ground in deep thought. I couldn't tell what he was thinking, by, of course, his blank expression, but I had a good feeling that it was of remorse. He won't show me his emotions, he thinks he's too old to let go in front of me . . .like I was some kind of person that he felt like he always had to give the impression of being stone-cold and unfeeling.

"Ed . . .?" I began but was interrupted by him looking me back in the eyes with a gaze that stopped my train of thought. I shifted my eyes to the ground as well and held my hands close to my heart absentmindedly.

"So you haven't been back here in two years?" he asked me quietly, now looking back to the house that loomed over us in the darkness, giving off an ominous appearance. I nodded my head even though he wasn't looking in my direction, but I just found it hard to speak. Ed took a couple steps towards the house and stopped in front of the door. I remained where I was, the feeling in my legs lost.

"Well, we have nowhere else to go, really, so let's stay here for a while, okay?" he suggested in a kind tone which took me by surprise slightly. He said "we" and "let's" . . .staying with him . . .both of us in the same house . . .what? I shivered in the cold wind and held my shoulders tightly. My childhood friend . . .the one who I thought was dead . . .and the one that I haven't seen for two whole years . . .is offering to stay in the same house as me. Is it possible? Did Edward Elric actually mature? I stared up at him in a daze, the thoughts running through my head as he looked back at me.

"What? Why are you looking at me like that? You really look stupid standing there . . ." he informed me, his face glowing with panic and nervousness. I snapped out of my daze and shook my head with a smile. Ed mature? What was I thinking?

I walked up beside him as he glared down at the door, his expression immediately flashing from immature Ed to "Mr. State Alchemist" in the blink of an eye. He turned the knob on the door and it rattled—locked. After staring down the lock, he pulled up his red sleeve and ripped off a loose piece of metal (much to my objection) and laid it down on the porch. He then clapped his gloved hands over the object and pressed them around the scrap as a bright blue light shot up from the ground. I watched in awe, though I have seen him conduct alchemy many times before, but I haven't seen it in such a long time that the light almost blinded me. I looked away and when I glanced back, the light was gone and Ed was shoving a metal key into the lock.

"This should be right . . ." he muttered to himself as he fumbled the key around in the lock, listening hard for a sound of it unlocking. Finally, after a few tense moments, a loud click sounded and he sighed with relief. He pushed open the door and walked inside of the dark room. I quickly followed him; desperately trying to get away from the chilling wind that kept whipping around me.

Even after one year of loneliness, the house looked exactly the same. Grandmother Pinako looked like she had never left at all and everything was completely normal. I almost imagined seeing her poke her head from behind the doorway, ready to reprimand Ed about his hair or something. But—no, nobody came, and nobody spoke. A heavy and dead silence greeted us as we stood in the living room, gazing around. I stood still, afraid to move in the pitch-black darkness and then the bright lights came on. I blinked like crazy, trying to get the spots out of my eyes and turned to see Ed standing by the light switch, staring at it in amazement.

"They still work? Talk about convenient . . ." he mumbled in numbed shock. It was strange that the electricity would still be on, but I wasn't complaining. I really didn't want to spend however long we were going to be stay in here in the dark. Lighting candles would be beautiful . . .but—no! That's too creepy with Ed here! What am I thinking?

I shook my head again, trying to rid myself of my insane thoughts and gave all of my attention to the blonde in front of me. I walked over to him, grabbed his non-metallic arm and pulled him towards the couch. Ed resisted, which I had expected him to do, but gave in once again and let me fling him down on the couch. He sprawled out on it, immediately making himself at home and I sat down beside him. I took his auto-mail arm into my lap and rolled up his sleeve to look at it more closely. By the way he was letting me hold it; he seemed really tense so I shook his arm a bit. He loosened.

"You totally destroyed this thing . . ." I muttered under my breath sadly, staring down at the broken and abused arm melancholically. I put so much work into this auto-mail . . .and it only gets ruined in a matter of seconds. What made him do this? I try so hard to make each auto-mail more and more efficient and I really thought that this would be the greatest one I ever made and would last the longest. Each one I make is so important to me, especially the ones I make for Ed, and it breaks my heart every time he comes back to me with it in his other hand. But no matter, I still fix them anyway . . .

"I thought I would never see you again so I figured that it was useless keeping it perfect if it only reminded me of you every time I looked at it . . ." he told me quietly, noticing my depressed face. When I looked back up at him, our faces were three inches away from each other because he had been leaning over me, watching what I was doing. His face suddenly bloomed bright red and his eyes grew wide in embarrassment. He immediately moved as far away from me as his arm would allow and fixed his gaze on the ceiling as if deeply immersed in the way the white paint looked.

"I mean . . .I just gave up hope, that's all . . ." he added quickly, trying to make his previous sentence not sound so weird. I smiled lightly at the way he was acting and stood to my feet, resting his arm back on the couch. He snatched it to him again and examined it thoroughly even though I didn't do anything to it yet. I was to distracted by his messed up hair to work on his arm right now. I went around to the back of the couch and stood behind him. He was too immersed in his arm to turn around and look at me, but I didn't really need him to.

I lightly touched his soft, golden hair with my fingers and ran them down through it. Ed stopped examining his arm and became rigid. I pulled my fingers through the rest of his hair and started again at the top. His shoulder relaxed and he rested his back up against the couch, obviously enjoying this. After playing with his hair for a minute or two, I pulled out a black hair-tie from my skirt pocket and began to braid his hair like he always did. I used to always have to do this when we were younger, but as he got older, he grew more independent and attempted to braid it himself rather sloppily. I twisted the silky hair into a loose braid and wrapped the tie around the bottom of it. When I was finished, Ed still didn't move. I peeked over his shoulder and saw that his eyes were closed. I smiled, even though I was kind of freaked out that I had put him to sleep just by playing with his hair. He looked so peaceful when he slept . . .it was the only time I ever saw him relaxed around me . . .why could he be this way more often and talk to me . . .like old times . . .?

I walked back around the front of the couch and knelt down in front of him on the floor. I watched him sleep and noticed a loose strand of his golden hair that was tickling his nose and making it twitch. I giggled softly as his noise twitched around again, trying to free itself from the hair. I released him of his sleepy burden gently. When I was taking my hand back, though, it accidentally grazed his cheek lightly . . .subtle . . .but just enough to make him open his eyes. He looked down at me with half-lidded eyes for a moment and then sat up suddenly.

"What! I'm still here! It wasn't a dream?" He asked nobody in particular but more to himself than me, glancing around the room frantically. He stopped looking and reached a hand behind his head to touch his newly done braid. That was when he fixed his eyes back on me.

"That still works?" he asked me, referring to the trick of putting him to sleep by playing with his hair. His cheeks rushed slightly with pink as he said this and he immediately looked in the other direction once again. I smiled and sat down beside him again. I inched closer to him, but he only moved farther away from me. I kept moving closer and closer, and he kept moving farther and farther until we were at the end of the couch. Now knowing that he had no escape from talking to me, he looked wearily back at me, his eyes begging for mercy of my "dreaded talks".

"Ed . . .you said something about Al being gone when we were at your house . . .where is he? What happened? Tell me everything, Ed, and don't ignore me!" I added quickly when I saw him starting to look away. He glanced back at me and smiled in a goofy way, then switched back to his "serious mode". He averted his gaze to the wooden floor underneath us and rested his elbows on his knees . . .his usual position from what I can remember. I knew this was going to be a tough subject to get out of him, but I wanted to know. Something important has happened . . .something I don't know about . . .

"Al is . . .gone . . ." Ed whispered softly to the floor, looking at his hands. I knew this already, but I also knew that this was only the beginning of his explanation of everything so I waited patiently for more. His voice was so quiet and gentle . . .and he sounded to be on the verge of tears, but he would never cry . . .not in front of me . . .Saying that somebody was "gone" didn't necessarily mean they left . . .in Al's case, "gone" could mean many things . . .

"Envy and Lust . . .they broke his seal when you were gone . . .they did it right in front of my eyes . . .I tried to help him . . .but . . .I couldn't . . .I'm such a coward . . ." he whispered, his voice trailing in and out of hearing. At the last words, he clenched his fists tightly and closed his eyes, squeezing them shut. I wanted to say something to him about not being a coward . . .but my mouth was so dry . . .I could hardly breathe . . .Al's gone . . .the one thing both Ed and I had been hoping wouldn't ever happen, happened and now it's over. His only brother . . .my best friend . . .gone forever. It hit me like a truck and I found there to be no air around me . . .just . . .nothing. Why did this happen? It's so hard on him . . .I know it is . . .even though he's trying not to show it, his grief and anguish is obvious . . .

"All that . . .after all that we've done . . .I let him die . . .I let him die in the hands of the homunculi!" he cried out in sudden fury, shaking with anger, but still holding in his tears that were begging to come out. I felt my eyes fill with tears as he said all of this, but continued to stare at him, wanting to know more. I felt so helpless . . .here I was, sitting beside my best friend who has gone through hell and back, lost his only brother, was thought to be dead, and mourned over my supposed grave, and I couldn't even make any effort in comforting him. What's wrong with me? Why can't I help him? Why can't I touch him? He needs me . . .now more than ever . . .and I can't touch him . . .

"It's all my fault . . .I should've never gone looking for it . . ." he told me quietly, still focusing his now opened eyes on the floor again and not looking at me. I was getting used to this ignored treatment I was constantly receiving from him, but it still hurt me.

You could never tell the grief he is going through by looking him in the eyes . . .he's so good at making people believe he doesn't have a single emotion running through his body.

"The stone, you mean?" I whispered quietly to him, holding in the tears and choking back sobs that were on the verge of escaping out of me. He didn't acknowledge my input, but ran his hands through his gold bangs and rested them back on his knees once more. The silence of the room was killing me and I wanted so badly for somebody to randomly barge in here with a tuba or something and start playing as loud as they could . . .just to break this horrible silence . . .

"If I hadn't gone looking for it . . .Al . . .would never have gotten killed . . .and if I had just left Alchemy be in the first place, he would have never had to go through all that . . ." he continued, staring at his hands in deep thought. His eyes were closed again, but not in a strained way, but more in a peaceful sort of way. It still wasn't as calm as he looked when he was asleep, but it was close enough.

"It wasn't your fault . . ." I added in, now looking at the floor also. I heard him turn in his spot to face me for once, maybe amazed by what I was saying. My face grew hot as I stared at the wood patterns, fiddling with the edge of my skirt as well. "and besides, Ed, you're strong . . .you'll be fine—"

A loud sound of frustration issued from his mouth and I looked up to see his amber eyes glinting with fury. Before I could say another word, he stood to his feet so suddenly, he knocked over the table in front of us. "HOW CAN I BE FINE WHEN MY LITTLE BROTHER IS GONE! HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO GET ON WITH MY LIFE WITHOUT AL BESIDE ME!" he shouted, glaring down at me who was still sitting on the couch, staring up at him with tear-filled eyes. Ed walked to the other side of the room and crossed his arms over his chest, his back facing me. I slowly stood up from the couch and took a step towards him, but stopped.

"It's . . .its not . . ." I trailed off, not finding the right words. I stepped towards him slowly until I was about three feet away. "You made it through a year without him, didn't you? What makes you think that you can't live you life anymore? Besides . . ." I was interrupted by a low sigh from him and I stopped in mid-sentence.

"I sacrificed almost everything to save . . .and I just don't want to keep living like this . . .with all of this guilt hanging on me . . ." he drifted off from there, finding it too hard to continue. I reached out my arms to hug him from behind, but took them back and looked the other way. He's just not in the mood . . .I walked back to the couch and picked up the table that was still lying on the floor. He didn't say a word as I moved from the couch to the opposite wall from him and leaned up against it, staring out the dark window. Raindrops were starting to land on the outside glass and the chilling wind continued to blow incessantly. I pressed my hand up against the cool glass and squinted into the darkness, not knowing what else to say to him . . .

"Listen to you! All you're doing is putting yourself down!" I suddenly shouted at him, turning around to face him, but he still had his back to me. Anger rose inside of my chest uncontrollably and I stomped over to him and grabbed his shoulder forcefully. Taken back from my grip, he spun around and almost knocked me over. He glared at me hard; his gold eyes slanted coldly, but didn't say a word. "You say that you don't want to live in misery anymore, but here you are, constantly blaming every little thing that happened on yourself!"

"You think it's my fault! You think that I want to feel this way! I've tried so hard to forget everything but I can't! I can't! I'm a hopeless bastard with nothing in life to live for anymore—"

"Just shut up, already! Stop talking about yourself like that! You're not hopeless, you're not a coward—you're Edward Elric! You're the Full Metal Alchemist!"

"I used to be that! Everything's lost! Nothing I once had is here anymore! Nobody remembers my name, nobody remembers my face—nobody remembers me at all! I'm dead in their eyes!"

"I remembered your name! I remembered your face and I REMEMBERED YOU! I NEVER FORGOT YOU!" I hollered at him, my face burning with heat. Ed picked up a nearby vase and threw it against the far wall. It shattered with an ear-splitting sound and the pieces flew everywhere.

"BUT YOU'RE JUST ONE PERSON!"

"SO NOW WHAT? AM I NOT IMPORTANT TO YOU ANYMORE!"

"YOU WERE NEVER THAT IMPORTANT TO BEGIN WITH!" he shouted into my face, his eyes narrowed with fury. I closed my mouth when he said these last words. I felt my heart break into a million pieces inside of me and my soul felt crushed. I let my limbs hang loose to my sides in disbelief, staring at him with shining eyes. "WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU WHEN I NEEDED YOU! YOU NEVER CAME TO ME WHEN I NEEDED SOMEONE TO HELP ME OUT OF A HARD TIME! YOU WEREN'T THERE WHEN AL DIED, AND YOU WEREN'T THERE WHEN I LOST MY GRIP!"

The hatred I was feeling towards him at the moment was rising to a dangerous level and I felt like I could just explode any second. I clenched my fists at my sides, my sorrow forgotten and bit my lower lip in frustration.

"YOU'RE USELESS! YOU'RE NOTHING TO ME! I THOUGHT YOU WOULD COME BACK HERE AND TELL ME EVERYTHING'S ALL RIGHT, BUT YOU ONLY COME HERE TO SCREAM AT ME! YOU'RE NOTHING AT ALL TO ME!"

"JUST SHUT UP!" I screamed in final fury and threw myself at him, grabbing hold of him tightly. He didn't pull away, but seemed frozen in where he was standing. I pressed my lips firmly on his and held them there for the longest time. When I finally pulled away from him, he was staring at me like I was crazy; with his eyes wide in shock and his face burning bright red—but not from anger anymore. Just realizing what I had done, I covered my mouth with my hands and began to blush furiously. What did I do that for! Was I just trying to make him shut up! WHAT THE HELL?

"YOU'RE SUCH AN IDIOT!" I screamed at him, trying to cover up what I had just done by yelling at him some more. Even though the blush was still bright on his face, he made it seem like he was angry again. "YOU CAN'T JUST SHUT UP WHEN I'M TRYING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING, CAN YOU! I HATE YOU! YOU ARE THE MOST INSUFFERABLE BOY I'VE EVER MET!" I waited for him to yell back at me, keeping the heat of the argument alive, but there was only silence. I panted heavily from all of my shouting and swallowed with difficulty, feeling my voice starting to leave me. Ed stared down at me with a dazed look in his eyes and started to lean towards me, closing his eyes slightly. When he was about four inches away from my face, I pulled back my hand and slapped him across the face as hard as I could, making him look the other way. He stumbled backwards, his left hand resting on his cheek and gazed at me in shock. His cheek was already starting to glow bright red, but I held no regrets.

"OW! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!" he yelled at me, still holding his cheek protectively and now standing a safe distance away from me. I glared as hard as I could in his direction, my face still burning bright red from embarrassment and old anger.

"I'm trying to argue with you and you try to kiss me!" I yelled at him, glaring at him furiously. Why did he try to kiss me just now? What came over him?

"Well, you just kissed me!" he shouted back at me, making the fact clear. I opened and closed my mouth like a fish out of water, a deep rouge blush starting to form on my cheeks. No words came to me at the moment and I just stood there stupidly, my face blooming with colour. He had a point . . .

"Well . . ." I started, trying to make up some excuse for my actions. I stumbled around with my words for a moment, looking down at the floor. "I only did it so you would shut up!" I finished, glaring him back in the eyes. "You wouldn't shut up so I had to stop you somehow! You just go on and on and on and don't stop whatsoever! It was the only way to make you finally shut the hell up from bitching and whining and complaining and—"

A sharp sting smacked me across the face and my head snapped to the side. I froze where I was for a second, my mind unaware of what just happened, but then soft, gloved hands grabbed my cheeks and warm lips suddenly pressed against mine in a forceful sort of way and I completely lost it. I jerked away from him and backed up. He was staring at me with a bright red face and glanced down at the floor nervously.

"WHY DID YOU SLAP ME!" I screamed at him, thoroughly confused by his actions. Ed didn't say anything, but stomped away from me, and back to the window. I followed after him, not finished with him yet.

"You could've just asked me to shut up and I would've! I'm not as thick-sculled as you are! I know when I need to shut up! You didn't have to slap me! Besides, it's rude to hit a girl, don't you know that!" I bitched at him, staring at his back and sagged shoulders. He quickly spun around and faced me, his face still bright red from a blush and frustration.

"Look, I'm sorry already! It worked on me and I thought it . . .would work . . .on you . . ." he yelled at me, but then trailed off quietly, seeing my confused face. I didn't say another word to him, as he looked the other way again, the irritation getting to him. "It never happened, okay!" he stated in a final sort of way, signaling the end of our argument. He crossed his arms over his chest and looked the other way. I, too, crossed my arms and looked in the opposite direction, still pissed about what had just happened. We remained like that as we muttered little sounds of agreement.

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Never happened."

"Yup, never happened."

We remained silent for a bit, still not looking at each other and standing in a pouty way. The awkward silence that passed between us was starting to get heavy and I could tell that Ed was getting annoyed by it by the way he kept sighing. Eventually, he moved away from me and stomped down the hallway to where he knew we had our spare bedrooms and slammed himself inside one of them without a 'good night'. Now knowing that he was gone, I also moved out of my position and stared at the closed door in which he had just entered through. I sighed quietly to myself and slowly stepped up the stairs to my old bedroom, remembering the way to it exactly. I pushed open the door to see it all in the same way it looked when I had left it . . .except for a lot of dust. I'll clean later . . .

I walked over to my bed and sat down on the covers, too tired to move. After a while, my eyelids began to grow heavy and they started to droop. I tipped over slowly and landed on my bed on my side. I stared out the window across from me and saw the rain lashing the glass outside ferociously, the storm now raging. I closed my eyes and quickly fell asleep.

LATER IN THE NIGHT

I opened my eyes again for at least the 20th time since I had fallen asleep, the rain constantly waking me up. There was also another thought running through my head that wouldn't leave me alone. Getting frustrated by this, I swung my legs around to the side of my bed and stood on the cold wood floor in my bare feet. I stepped over to the door, glaring at my rain soaked window as I passed it, and opened the door quietly and slowly. The house still had its' lights on, none of us bothering to turn them off when we stomped away in our opposite directions to sleep. I walked down the stairs, cringing with each creaking sound the steps made until I reached the bottom. I turned down the hallway to where the spare bedrooms were located and paused in front of the room Ed had shut himself inside of.

I slowly turned the knob of the door and pushed it open. I stood in the dark room, seeing his body on the bed, sleeping peacefully. I stepped closer to him, trying not to make a single sound. I watched his sleeping figure for a moment, marveling at the peaceful way he looked. His golden hair was messed up again and his red cloak, boots and gloves were lying on the floor aimlessly, deserted and forgotten for the night. I took another step towards him, but something slipped underneath me and I flew backwards on the floor with a crash. I lay there, dazed as I heard him sit up abruptly in the bed, startled by the noise.

"What do you want?" he asked me coldly, some of his anger from earlier reflecting in his voice and sleep muddling up his words. I sat up quickly and looked up at him, who was staring down at me with half-lidded eyes. I looked away from him, the embarrassment getting the better of me.

"I'm sorry . . .but I kept thinking about something you said to me . . .two years ago . . ." I whispered quietly to the floor, unsure of what to say next. There was a long pause of silence between the two of us, and then knowing that he wasn't going to say anything to my previous sentence, I continued.

"What did you have to tell me back at the train station?" I blurted out rather quickly, the words just flowing out of me too fast. Ed still didn't say anything, but continued to stare at me unemotionally. I put my head down in shame of asking him something like that. He probably doesn't even remember himself . . .

After some more silence, I said softly: " . . .That's . . .all I thought about when . . .well . . .we were separated . . ." I waited for him to be silent again, pretty sure that he wasn't going to talk to me at all. I stood to my feet grudgingly; thinking that this was the end of our conversation and started to head towards the door, my face blooming pink.

"I wanted to tell you . . .I wasn't going to be there when you got back . . ." Ed suddenly whispered quietly, breaking the silence. I stopped walking and turned around to see him sitting up in bed, staring at the covers in front of him. There was almost a trace of a smile on his face as he said these words. " . . .you see . . .I had a mission that next week . . .and I just forgot to tell you . . ." he finished, that faint smile still on his face. Did he think it was ironic how he wasn't going to be there when I was supposed to get back, but I didn't come back anyway? Is that what was making him smile like that?

He looked up at me, that ghost of a smile gone from his face. His golden eyes reflected the light coming from the living room behind me. I stared him straight in the eyes, not afraid to look away from him this time. "I can't believe you're here . . .when I heard the news . . .I was so afraid . . .I went into denial, I guess you can say. Then . . .then Al died . . .and I completely lost it . . .I gave up all hope for happiness and just shut myself away from everything . . ." his voice dropped to a bare minimum that I had to almost lean in towards him to hear the rest. Though his words were soft and capable of tears, he did not cry. He wouldn't cry . . .

I walked over to him and sat down on the edge of his bed carefully and rested my hand on his in a comforting gesture. He didn't seem to acknowledge my action, but remained still and unmoving. His hand was cold and clammy and I almost pulled away from it, but stopped myself.

"It's okay now . . .you'll get through this . . ." I whispered softly to him, choosing my words more carefully then earlier. I almost waited for him to lash out at me again, but he only looked down at the floor to the side of him, shielding his eyes from me by his long bangs.

"It's just not fair . . .how is it that one survives and the other dies? Who decides that? Where's the equivalent exchange in that? Why did it have to be me? Why did I have to be the one who lives?" he asked himself more than me, subtle anger rising in his voice. I leaned towards him, desperately trying to look him in the eyes.

"Don't say that! Things . . .just happen for reasons . . .but . . .Ed . . .you have people that really care about you . . .and . . ." I stopped talking when I saw his gaze switch from the floor to our hands that were still piled on top of each other. I couldn't tell what he was thinking, but I quickly pulled away from him, embarrassed by my actions. I stood up from the bed and started towards the door again, acting as if nothing had happened.

"But about you . . .how did you make it and nobody else?" he suddenly called to me from the bed, trying to make me not leave. I stopped yet again right in front of it, but I didn't turn around to face him like last time. I took a deep breath, trying to remember exactly what had happened that night . . .

"It's strange . . .but I was standing on the back of the train, trying to clear my head from a headache earlier when I heard the sound of screeching metal and I was jolted around where I was standing. I remember grabbing onto the railing, trying to steady myself as the train suddenly reared off to the side and I flew out of the place I was standing in and landed on the grass along side of the tracks," I told him, reflecting back on the horrible night. "I watched as the train careened off of the tracks and fell into the river below us just as a fire broke out in the engine. I saw the people trapped inside of the train, either burning or drowning from the rushing water . . ." I dropped my voice to barely a whisper, tears welling inside of my eyes from the memories. Ed was silent the whole time, listening intently to everything I was saying.

"I tried to help them . . .but my leg was twisted and I could only crawl . . .so I crawled into some of the trees near me where I stayed there the night. Some time in the middle of the night, a lady came to me and took me to her house and helped me get better . . .she didn't tell anybody that I was from the train, which made everyone believe that I was dead in this town. I stayed with her for about three weeks until my leg was better, and then I started to live on my own. I thought about coming back here earlier, but I didn't want to scare everybody out of their wits by just showing up randomly. So I stayed in various hotels, buying tools, fixing auto-mail and trying to live for those two years . . ." I continued, still not turning around to face him.

"Then . . .one night . . .I was out late coming back from somebody's house and making an auto-mail for them when the thought of you ran through my mind. I had been thinking about you a lot, but the question of your life kept bugging me, so I finally asked someone if they had heard about you lately. They told me that you were dead and so did many other people until one person said that there was a slim chance of you still living. I took that as a 'yes' and ran to this town as fast as I could . . ." I finally finished and turned towards him, smiling lightly to him. He was staring at me, but there was no trace of anger in his eyes anymore.

I walked over to him and at back down on his bed again, staring him in the eyes. I leaned forwards and wrapped my arms around his neck, pressing my face into his shoulder. He didn't hug me like usual, but I didn't mind anymore. I was starting to get used to the way he was.

"You scared me . . ." he whispered softly, his voice so close to my ear, but still so faraway. I held him tighter, enjoying the way he felt against me. I smiled into his collarbone and closed my eyes. The next thing that happened caught me by surprise and I almost jumped in shock. Two arms slowly wrapped around my body and held me close. A cold touch of metal brushed up against my exposed back and I flinched involuntarily, but stopped myself, not wanting to make him more self-conscious about it. He buried his face into my shoulder gently as he held me tight. He's holding me . . .this is the first time he's ever held me like this since we were ten . . .and now . . .after seven years . . .he's not afraid anymore . . .

"I didn't mean to say those things to you . . .I was just . . ." He suddenly let go of me and I let my arms drop as well. He stared at me for a moment, then looked down at the covers again. "You'd better go . . ." he informed me, signaling the end of our conversation. As much as I didn't want to leave, I stood up from his bed and walked to the door again and this time, walked through it. Just as I was about to close the door, I turned around to face him and smiled gently.

"Goodnight . . ."

"G'night . . ."

I closed the door and walked back to the stairs and stepped up them one-by-one, climbing to the top. I went back to my room and closed myself inside of it again. I snuggled under the covers and turned towards the window. The rain had stopped and some drops still clung onto the glass outside. I rolled back to the other side to face the wall and mindlessly clutched my hand that was resting on his a few minutes ago. I smiled softly to myself and closed my eyes, my thoughts and questions finally answered.

I was scared too . . .

A/N: YAY! Chappie 2 is done! Did you guys like it? I'm glad the first one was good enough for reviews! Did that chappie answer your questions? If you guys have anymore, they'll probably be answered in the next one too! Eh . . .:sweatdrop: Yea. So, please review this! Till next update!

K-c