Chapter 2: Arrival
"Yesss, yesss!" Zim hissed as his hands hovered over the controls, red eyes fixed on the containment chamber before him, "That's it, my little beavers, dance! DANCE! DANCE FOR ZIM!"
Zim cackled madly as the two fine beaver specimens inside the chamber did, in fact, dance. It was a square dance. Complete with tiny straw hats. "Finally! My plan is coming to fruition!" exclaimed the small green Irken Invader, "Soon I will control the dancing of all the beavers on Earth!"
His laughing was cut off suddenly by an alarm klaxon and a screen snaking down to his face. "Eh?" he asked, peering at the screen, "What is this?"
"Unknown power signature detected in low earth orbit!" the deep, mechanical voice of Zim's base intoned as a small computer-generated image of the earth as well as a small blinking dot appeared on the screen.
"Eh?" Zim grunted, peering at the screen, "Unknown power signature? Here? Impossible! The Irken Empire has cataloged all known races' power signatures! Computer! Put up a harmonics analysis of the signature on screen."
"Processing... PROCESSING!" the computer exclaimed before showing the requested data to Zim.
"Whaaat?" Zim queried, staring suspiciously at the data before him, "This can't be true. That power signature is close to an Irken one... but different somehow." Zim pondered for a few moments more before calling out, "Gir! Get down here!"
Within moments, the small robot was in the lab, falling from a recess in the ceiling, soaking wet and smelling of popcorn. Gir lept to attention and saluted, eyes flashing crimson for a moment before shifting into the more normal cyan, "Yes, my master!"
"Gir, there's something wrong with the sensors," Zim stated, glaring at the little robot suspiciously, "You haven't been stuffing cheese into the sensor grid again, have you?"
"Yes!" Gir exclaimed happily before running around in circles for a moment then stopping, "I like to feeeeeed the computer!"
Zim grimaced and gritted his tooth-like appendages. "Grr! Gir! You must stop damaging our equipment! I need all our base's functionality if I am to destroy these filthy earth slugs!" Zim turned away from the robot who began to twirl in place, "Computer! Send some cleaning and repair drones down to the sensor grid and repair the cheesy damage."
"Internal diagnostic reports no fermented cow excretions present!" the computer replied.
"Eh? No cheese?" Zim asked in surprise before turning back to the screen, "But does that mean this really exists? What could it be? What? AAAAAH! Computer! It's gone! Where is the signal?!"
Sure enough, the little blinking green dot had disappeared from the screen. "Signature acquisition lost!"
"What? How?!"
"Internal diagnostic reports now there IS fermented cow excretions in the sensor core."
Zim almost exploded in rage. "Gir!!!"
Vim smiled at her new holographic body and human dwelling. The Irken technology was surely gifted at subterfuge. She was now a human child with blonde hair and blue eyes. Rather disturbingly thin as well, and wearing a horizontally black and yellow striped shirt and matching skirt. Having completed her costume and created her base, she next turned to Rid, stroking her new chin thoughtfully. "Mm. We need you to blend in. What kind of pets do these humans have?"
The small robot popped out an impossibly large monitor from it's head and began displaying typical earth pets.
"Dog? Hmm. No, no. Too smelly. Cat? Ugh, no. Too hairbally. Pig? Hmm... too much pork, I think. Aha! That's it! Perfect!" Vim grinned as an image paused on the screen. A few touches of controls later, and Rid's image shimmered, becoming that of a rather oversized, but still cute, gerbil.
"Perfect, Rid!" Vim exclaimed as she walked into the house, the gerbil following, "Now we need to get into these human computers and be setup as a normal human family. Then, we begin our search for the mighty Irken Invader of this planet."
The door closed behind her with finality.
"Class, today we have yet another futile life being added to this hopeless and horrible group," Ms. Bitters announced to the assembled students, "We can only hope that her time on this earth will be as short and meaningless as yours." The withered husk of a teacher pointed a claw like finger at the blonde, snarling, "Introduce your horrible self then take a horrible seat."
Vim's eyes gazed out at the sea of blank stares in front of her, searching the class. Scanning back and forth, the blonde alien did a double-take on seeing Zim. He looked... most inhuman. Could he be the famed Irken Invader she sought? No, that was impossible. Surely he would have a much better disguise. That ruse wouldn't fool anyone. On the opposite side of the room another figure caught her attention. My goodness! Look at the size of his head!
"Uhm, hi!" she called out to the group of disinterested faces, "I'm Vim. I just moved here, so, um... I don't really know my way around. Anyway, I hope I can have lots of friends! Uh... that's all I guess!" Eager to avoid attention, at least for now, the girl took the only empty seat, right next to the big-headed boy.
"Today we will learn how much of life is full of futile empty nothingness," Ms. Bitters proclaimed sourly as Vim sat down, "You will all be tested on how well you describe dying alone and afraid. Open your wildlife survival manuals to the description of the disemboweling of a woodland creature."
Nothing in all of Vim's military experience could have prepared her for the Skool. It was the most depressing, mind numbing, boring form of torture she had ever endured. Still, she took copious notes; the system might be useful back on Flarg for interrogation purposes.
"Zim looks preoccupied today," the large craniumed child next to Vim muttered to himself, staring at the green figure. He did, in fact, look rather worried and preoccupied. "What's the matter, Zim?" Dib piped up calling over to the other side of the room, "Did your alien leaders laugh at your stupid attempts at world domination?"
Zim glared at Dib through his contacts. "Nonsense, Dib-stink! I was merely... studying! Yes! For this filthy earth test involving gutted earth-monsters! You speak madness! MADNESS!"
A girl behind Zim sighed and held her head in her hands. "Not again..."
Vim perked up at this sudden animation in the otherwise dreary class. For her part, Ms. Bitters appeared unaware that anyone was talking over her droning, scratching voice. Either that or she didn't care. Probably the latter. Vim leaned to the side and asked one of the children, "What's going on?"
"Oh, that's just crazy Dib. He keeps insisting the green kid is an alien. Phish. He's not an alien. He has a skin condition."
Vim nodded slowly, taking another look at Zim. Hmm. Skin condition? Or was it possible he really was an alien? Perhaps the Invader she needed to find? If so... wow, that would be lucky. She discovers him the first day here on this wretched rock! And with such a large planet, too! Blue eyes shifted towards Dib curiously. Hmm. Perhaps he would know more...
"Silence!" Ms. Bitters suddenly said, coming out of her catatonic stupor, "No more talking! The next one who talks has to sit... in the corner." A hush fell over the class as everyone glanced at a corner of the room, covered in deep, unnatural shadow, with glowing sickly green eyes flickering in the depths. The strange sound of cicadas and flickering shadows that were disturbingly reminiscent of tentacles gibbered in the depths.
No one spoke until lunch.
Vim eyed the school lunch with distinct distaste. Was that green pod still moving?! Why did these horrible 'pea' things have hair? She shuddered hard and looked around the lunch room. Hmm. There was Zim and nearby, staring at him was the Dib child. Vim hesitated, then made her way towards Dib's table. After all, if Zim was the alien she was after... it was better he learned as little as he could from her.
"Uhm, hi, is this seat taken?" Vim asked, sitting down in front of Dib. The big headed boy blinked in surprise then leaned over a bit to try and look behind Vim. "Not really, but could you move? I'm obsessively watching Zim. You never know when he will pull something, y'know? I have to be ready for anything, for the sake of the human race!"
Vim stared blankly for a bit then slid over a bit, facing Gaz who was, as usual, deeply engrossed in a game. For a moment, Vim sat quietly, looking between the two. Finally, though, she cleared her throat. "Uhm, I heard that, uh... you think Zim is an alien?"
Dib's eyes flickered to Vim for a moment, his eye twitching, "He is an alien! I don't see how anyone can't see it! I mean look at him!" Dib motioned towards the Invader, "He has green skin! No ears! And he never eats the food! I mean, c'mon!" Gaz's teeth clenched in annoyance as Dib rambled. "He's been trying to take over the planet, but no one believes me! Oh, but they'll be sorry. They'll all be sorry once I expose him for what he is!" He frowned darkly, "You probably think I'm crazy, don't you?"
Vim hesitated. He sure seemed a little unhinged. Still... she needed more information. "Well. Uh. I... like to keep my mind open!" she replied with a charming smile, "Perhaps you could... show me everything you know about him? Maybe that will convince me he's an alien?"
Dib blinked twice, staring at Vim in shock. "What? You're not just going to say I'm crazy? Wow! No one ever has been interested in my paranormal studies. Well, except for Tak, but she doesn't count."
Vim stared blankly. "Tak?" she questioned.
"Long story, not important," Dib replied dismissively. "Anyway... if you're serious and not just saying things because you're afraid I'll freak out – I won't by the way; I'm sane! -- come to my house after Skool. Let me give you the address..."
