Crimson Love


Reason for fast updates: I have no life

Inspiration for fast updates: My sick and evil mind

Reviewers I want to thank: Dragonman180, Kie-san, Hinata's Biggest Fan Boy, RedLotusNin and IceHunterNin, xl-twisted-lx, Mika, and… wait, that's it. Thank you guys! You all reviewed every chapter (Yay) I am undeserving… O.o'

…Yep, that's it. Ok, enjoy! (My author notes have gotten short, haven't they?)


Chapter Eleven: Medieval


"Wait, my house is that way," Sakura said, watching her street go by.

"I know," Ukon said casually, twiddling the steering wheel.

"Then why are we going this way?" she asked curiously.

He shrugged. "Aren't you hungry?"

"A little," she admitted.

"So let's go get something to eat," he said with a grin. "Anywhere. Your choice."

"Anywhere?" At his nod, she thought for a moment. She knew money wasn't an issue; she'd seen inside his wallet when he had paid for their hot chocolates that morning, and he had wads and wads of bills in there. Big bills. So he could probably take her to a fancy restaurant if she asked him to. But she didn't really feel like fine-dining and three-course meals. "Actually," she said, grinning slightly, "I could really go for a hamburger."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "A hamburger?"

She nodded firmly. "And a sprite."

He made a goofy face and shrugged. "Ok, hamburger it is, then."

"Let's go through the drive-thru, though, since my mom is expecting us back."

"Alright." He pulled into a Burger King drive-thru. (Note: Burger King Fries taste better then MacDonalds fries. (H-R: they're all fries to me))

"Hi, welcome to Burger King, may I take your order," the possible-crackhead teen said over the intercom.

"One Double Whopper meal," Ukon said.

"Wait, what about—" He held up a hand to stop her, and winked.

"Just wait," he said, grinning.

"So that's a Double Whopper meal," the teen said in a monotone.

"No, a Double Whopper meal with a Pepsi," Ukon corrected.

"Ok, so a Double Whopper meal with a Pepsi. Is that all?"

"No, I'd like a hamburger, too."

"Ok, a Double Whopper meal with a Pepsi and a hamburger. Is that all?"

"No, I'd like a sprite, too."

"Would that be a separate drink from your Pepsi?" (Note: All phrases from teen said in crackhead monotone)

"Yep."

"Alright a Double Whopper meal with a Pepsi and a hamburger and a sprite. Is that all?"

"No, I'd like a medium fries, too."

"A Double Whopper meal with a Pepsi and a hamburger and a sprite and a medium fries. Would that be all?"

"No, I'd like a large Angus meal, too."

"A Double Whopper meal with a Pepsi and a hamburger and a sprite and a medium fries and a large Angus meal. What drink would you like?"

"Coke."

"A Double Whopper meal with a Pepsi and a hamburger and a sprite and a medium fries and a large Angus meal with a Coke. Would that be all?"

"No, I'd like a double cheese burger, too."

"A Double Whopper meal with a Pepsi and a hamburger and a sprite and a medium fries and a large Angus meal with a Coke and a double cheese burger. Would that be all?"

"Nope, I'd like a large fries and Coke with that."

"Double Whopper meal with a Pepsi and a hamburger and a sprite and a medium fries and a large Angus meal with a Coke and a double cheese burger and a large fries and Coke. Would that be all?"

"Nope, I'd like a spicy Tendercrisp chicken sandwich meal."

"Double Whopper meal with a Pepsi and a hamburger and a sprite and a medium fries and a large Angus meal with a Coke and a double cheese burger and a large fries and Coke and a Tendercrisp chicken sandwich meal. What drink would you like with that meal?"

"Fries."

"……………………….." There was a long pause. "Excuse me, sir?"

"I said a Sprite."

"Oh. So that's a Double Whopper meal with a Pepsi and a hamburger and a sprite and a medium fries and a large Angus meal with a Coke and a double cheese burger and a large fries and Coke and a Tendercrisp chicken sandwich meal with a sprite. Would that be all?"

"No, I'd like a Cherry Icee, too."

"Double Whopper meal with a Pepsi and a hamburger and a sprite and a medium fries and a large Angus meal with a Coke and a double cheese burger and a large fries and Coke and a Tendercrisp chicken sandwich meal with a sprite and a Cherry Icee. Would that be all?"

"You're not too good at remembering things, are you? I said all that at the beginning."

Sakura would have fallen over if her seat belt wasn't holding her in place.

"Yes sir. That's all?"

"Yep, that'll about do it."

The crackhead teen rang it all up, and Ukon pulled up to the second window and took all the bags in the window and gave them to Sakura, who was looking at him funny.

"What?" he asked as they pulled away. "I had to get food for Kidoumaru, Tayuya, Sakkon and Kimimaro," he cried, as if this were obvious.

Sakura rolled her eyes, fishing through the five bags on her lap. In the end, she put them on the seat between them and looked through while Ukon held one of the drink trays in one hand and one in his lap. "Which one was yours?" she asked, frowning.

"The Double Whopper."

"Oh. Here you go." She gave him the Double Whopper and fries and took the drink tray away from him, reaching back and setting it in the back seat and propping it up with the bags of food that weren't theirs, after taking her food out. She also took the tray out of his lap, which contained their drinks (how she could tell the Coke from the Pepsi is beyond me) and stuck the drinks in the cup holders so they wouldn't spill, tossing the empty drink tray in the back with the other food.

They ate in silence for a while, since it took a while to get back to Sakura's house (He went to the Burger King in the next area code, practically) before Ukon finally said something.

"Did you listen to that CD I made you yet?" he asked, crumbling up the wrapper for his burger and putting it in one of the empty bags.

"Hmm hmph?" she asked through a mouthful of burger. (T: The what?) She quickly swallowed. "Oh, I forgot about that. It's on top of my CD player, but I haven't actually listened to it."

"Oh. Listen to it." He put his thing of fries against his leg and started eating them.

"Why?" she asked curiously, sipping her sprite.

"Just do it. Especially the last track."

"Again, why?" she asked, getting curious.

"Will you just do it?" he cried, looking slightly annoyed. "…Sorry. I didn't mean to snap. Just listen to it, ok?"

"Ok. I'll listen to it when I get home," she reassured him.

He nodded and went back to eating.

After she finished her sprite, she cleared the trash off the seat between them and unbuckled her seatbelt, scooting into the seat next to his and putting on that seat belt instead. He gave her a curious look, then grinned a little as she laid her head down on his shoulder. He finished his fries, then crumbled up the wrapper, tossing it in the backseat, and inched his arm around her shoulder, driving one-handed. (Now, is that safe? No.)

"Ukon," she said carefully.

"Sakura."

"As much as it pains me to say this, I think you need to meet my mom."

"…What?"

"Well, I don't want to pull a Shizuka and sneak around behind my parent's back, do I?"

"Your mom doesn't strike me as the kind of person who would like her only daughter to be going out with an eighteen-year-old."

"Oh, come on, yes she would, if she actually met you!"

"Would not."

"Would, too! Me and my mom both like the same things, and I like you!"

"…That's beside the point!" he said quickly, his cheeks turning a light pink.

"Please Ukon?" She turned on the puppy-dog pout.

He gave her a few quick glances, trying to focus on the road. When her lower lip quivered, however, he cracked. "Ok, fine, I'll meet her when we get to your house."

"And then you can come over for dinner some time!"

"Hey…" he said warningly.

"Like tomorrow night!"

"Hey!"

"We're here," she said before he could protest any further, as they pulled into the street before the Hanuro residence. "…Why's Ino's mom here?" she wondered aloud, watching said woman exit the house. "Oh, she's got Mom's casserole dish, nevermind. Ok, let's go." She unbuckled her seatbelt.

"What if she doesn't like me? Moms tend not to like me."

"She'll like you fine. Just be nice and polite and you'll be fine."

"Oh, hell no, Miss Thing, I'm not gonna be all 'yes ma'am', 'no ma'am'."

"And cut back on the cursing. A lot. And if you don't go 'yes ma'am', 'no ma'am', she won't like you and she won't let me see you!"

"…How will I know if she likes me?"

"When she calls you 'sweetie' or 'honey', you'll know."

"…'Honey'?" he repeated as they reached the door.

"Remember, nice and polite," she reminded him, thanking any god in heaven that he wasn't wearing the bleeding skull shirt. On the thought, she checked to make sure he wasn't wearing anything that would make her mom think he was a bad guy.

Zip-up hoodie, T-shirt, jeans, boots. Ok, we're good… wait, what does the T-shirt say? She pulled the hoodie aside and looked at his shirt.

"JESUS IS COMING! HIDE THE PORN!" his shirt read.

"Do something about your shirt."

"Huh? Why?"

"Just do it!"

He rolled his eyes. "Oh yeah, lemme just pull a spare outta my butt!" (Quote: H-R's friend, Shannon. Not sure if I got it right, though…) He zipped up his hoodie. "There."

"Ok, good." Satisfied that he was now presentable, she opened the door, pulling him in after her. "Mom?" she called.

"In here, sweetie," her mom called from the kitchen.

"Come on," Sakura hissed, pulling the reluctant Ukon through the dining room and into the kitchen where her mom was making cookies. "Mom?"

"Here, taste-test—" Her mom stopped, holding a plate of finished cookies, when she saw Ukon. "Oh. Hello."

"Mom, don't freak out, ok?" Sakura said threateningly, holding tightly to Ukon's hand to keep him from running away.

"I'm not freaking out. Why would I freak out?" Ms. Hanuro said calmly.

"Ok, ahem. Mom, this is Ukon." Sakura gestured to aforesaid.

Ukon smiled, offering Ms. Hanuro a hand, which she took. "Hi, Ms. Hanuro, I'm so glad to meet you properly," he said, causing Inner-Sakura's jaw to drop. "Sakura and I both felt that you need to be comfortable with me."

(LIAR! Inner-Sakura screamed.)

"Is that so?" Ms. Hanuro said, smiling. "Well, I suppose that's already, honey. Why don't you sit down and tell me about yourself before I give the 'ok'?" She gestured to the kitchen table, which was already heavily laden with cookies.

Well, that was fast, Sakura thought as they all sat down.

Ukon's grin was starting to look a little forced.

"So, how did you meet Sakura?" Ms. Hanuro asked, once they were all seated and Ukon had a plate of cookies at his disposal.

"Well, I met her at school, in a few of my classes, but she's also friends with my boss's daughter, Shizuka-sama," he answered before taking a bite of one of the cookies. His eyes popped out. "Wow! These are really good!" he cried, looking down at it.

"Why, thank you, dear," Ms. Hanuro said, looking please. "Have as many as you like. Now, what was that about a boss? You have a job?"

He nodded, polishing off the cookie and taking another. "Yes, ma'am. Orochimaru-sama, Shizuka-sama's father, owns his own international company, and there's a lot of competition, so I work as Shizuka-sama's personal body guard. Well, I'm one of them, anyway."

He lied to that quite nicely… Well, it wasn't completely a lie, Sakura mused silently while her mom asked about Ukon's paycheck. "Mom!" she cried, realizing this.

"No, its ok, Sakura," he reassured her, finishing off another cookie, even though he just ate. "I don't actually have a check every week, the money is automatically put into a private account and I just pull what I need," he explained to Ms. Hanuro.

"What about your car insurance?" Ms. Hanuro asked curiously. "You had to have gotten here somehow."

"Orochimaru-sama takes care of that," he answered as the cookies slowly disappeared. "The car was a Christmas present, so he keeps up the payments." (Let's face it, who should have to pay for their own present?)

"Well, that's very nice of him. What kind of car is it?"

"It's a Nii—" Ukon was cut off by his cell phone ringing. "Uh…"

"That's ok, you can answer it," Ms. Hanuro reassured him.

"Sorry." He took it out. "Hello?"

"Snif. Ukon?"

"Shizuka-sama? I thought you were at Neji's, why are you crying?" Pause. "Did he make you cry?" (In a deadly voice)

"No, I'm not at Neji's… Can you come pick me up? I can explain when you get here."

"Sure, sure," he said, already standing up and getting his keys. "Where are you?"

"I'm on the corner of 9th and 23rd and there's a whole lot of people outside. Please don't tell my dad!" (H-R whirls around and glares at SNG. SNG tried to grin it off. Death glare to painful. Shukaku and Kyuubi: )

"Don't worry, I'm coming to get you," he reassured her, hanging up. "Uh…" He turned back to Ms. Hanuro and Sakura. "Something came up because Shizuka-sama's being a… err… nitwit again, and she needs me to come get her and yeah," he said, backing away towards the door. "But we can finish this conversation sometimes, ok? Bye!"

And he was gone.

Ms. Hanuro and Sakura looked at each other.

"…Well?" Sakura asked after a long silence.

"He seems… nice…"

"Because he is!"

"Alright, dearie, but wasn't he wearing green lipstick?"

(9th and 23rd)

Ukon frowned, parking by the side walk and storming up the concrete stairs to the house. When he got to the top, he was instantly greeted by loud music, the sounds of teen-partying, and Shizuka, who looked like she'd never been happier to see him in her entire life.

"I'm sorry," she said, clutching the sweater she'd worn to ice-skating. "I just—I didn't know who else to call."

"It's ok, what's wrong?" Ukon asked, putting a comforting hand on her head.

She was cut off answering by an obviously drunk teen sidling by with a slut on one arm. "Hey, Shizuka," he said teasingly.

"Is that your boyfriend?" Ukon asked with a frown as the guy sidled away.

"No, I came here with Itachi," she confessed. "We hung out a few more times, and I liked the attention, so I had Neji lie and say I was over his house so I could come here with him, but…" She gave him a lip-quivering, hurt look. "All he wanted to do tonight was have sex! And I don't know, he just sort of came off a little rough, and I never—"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa." Ukon pulled her string of confessions to a stop. "He got rough with you?" Without waiting for an answer, he told her to go wait outside.

Shizuka nodded and went to stand on the lawn where not too many people were hanging around.

A few seconds later, she heard a gunshot and the sound of a window breaking.

"Alright, which one of your sorry asses is Uchiha?"

-oOo-

Itachi shouted something incoherent as Ukon threw him, stripped to his boxers, out onto the lawn. "What are you, crazy?" the oldest Uchiha shouted.

"Hey, Shizuka-sama," Ukon called, putting his foot on Itachi's head to keep him on the ground. Shizuka appeared from behind the truck, now clad in her sweater. "Uchiha's got something to say to you. Say sorry!" Ukon growled at Itachi.

"Oh, god, you are crazy!"

"Boy, you better tell that girl you're sorry before I ruin any chances of you ever having kids," Ukon snarled, grinding Itachi's face into the ground with his heel.

"I'm sorry!" Itachi shrieked at once. "Oh, god, I am sorry!"

"Say 'no means no, Shizuka-sama'!"

"No means no!"

"'No means no, Shizuka-sama'," Ukon growled, amid peals of laughter from the surrounding crowd.

"No means no, Shizuka-sama!"

(A few minutes later)

"So…" Neji said slowly, over Ukon's phone. Ukon had told Shizuka to call him on the way home and apologize. "…You went out with Uchiha…"

"Uh-huh…"

"…And you went to a party…"

"Yeah…"

"…Where kids were drinking…"

"Yeah…"

"…And getting high…"

"Mm-hmm…"

"…And having sex…"

"Uh-huh…"

"…And you went into a room where Uchiha tried to…"

"Yeah…"

"…But he didn't."

"Mm-mm."

On the other end of the phone, Neji paused for a moment to get a hold of himself. Then he went back to speaking in a monotone. "And then Ukon came…"

"Yeah."

"And took you home…"

"Mm-hmm."

"…After first 'bitchslapping' him…"

"Yeah."

"And now you're not going to see him anymore?"

"No," she said, just as Ukon called, "Only if she wants to be cast into an Amish existence!"

Neji could have sworn he heard the Hallelujah chorus. However, on the other end, Shizuka pulled the phone a few inches away from her ear, ready for the screaming.

Neji finally recovered from the Hallelujah chorus incident, and said, very slowly, trying to sound cheerful, "W-wow… t-that was s-some night!"

Shizuka's eyes widened. "Huh?"

"That was some night!"

Ukon and Shizuka looked at each other.

"So, I'll see you at school tomorrow, ok? Alright, ok, bye." He hung up as they pulled through the gates.

"Ok, that was weird," Shizuka said, giving Ukon his phone back. "And you promise not to call my dad?"

He nodded (duh). "Yeah."

"Alpha-kun honor?"

"Yes, Alpha-kun honor," he said, rolling his eyes as they pinky-swore. "Go to bed, ok?"

"Ok." She went down the hall to her room, where Kimimaro was undoubtedly waiting for her.

Ukon followed at a much more leisurely pace, hands in his pockets. When he got to his room, he opened the door and was greeted by Kamikaze rubbing against his leg. He reached down and scratched the kitty behind the ears, then went to sit on his bed.

(Please note the following actions are synchronized between Ukon and Neji)

Neji looked over at his pillow, and picked it up, putting it on his lap and fluffing it a few times, then, quite suddenly, smashed it over his face.

Neji: (muffled) AAAAAAAAAAH!

Ukon: (muffled) AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

(DISCLAIMER: The above chain of events involving Itachi's bitchslapping is copyrighted by the producers of Bringing Down The House. I love this movie, but I don't own the scene… Go see it!)

(Shizuka's room)

"!" Shizuka wailed, shaking her fists in a mini-tantrum.

"Well, didn't Ukon tell you not to?"

"…!"

"Oh, that's right, you never listen, do you?"

"!"

"Ok, I'm sorry."

(Ukon's room)

"Well, I can't exactly bitch slap her and tell her to leave, can I?" Ukon asked, cradling the phone against his ear with his shoulder and squeezing a worm of toothpaste onto his tooth brush. "I don't hit girls."

"No, but can't you just tell her to leave?" Sakura asked on the other line.

"Like she'd listen."

"Good point." Sakura thought for a moment while Ukon brushed his teeth. Yamiko most definitely wouldn't just leave her and Ukon alone. In fact, after careful study of Yamiko's character, Sakura highly suspected that she herself would be the target of many assassination plots that Ukon couldn't do anything about, seeing as said assassinations normally take place in the girl's bathroom. But she was Sakura, and she had Ukon, and there was no way she was losing him to a slut like Yamiko. "I have an idea."

"Hrut?" he asked through a mouthful of toothpaste foam.

"Just leave it to me, she'll leave us alone."

He spit out the toothpaste. "What're you going to do to her?"

"Just trust me."

"Um… ok?"

"I'll see you tomorrow, ok? Bye." She made a little kiss-kiss noise, then hung up and went out into the hall. "Mom, where do we keep the bleach?"

(Later)

Sakura smirked, patting her book bag. She had some nice, wonderful little presents for Yamiko tomorrow. Oh, yes. Sakura was a foul, sneaky little girl, and she knew it.

However, plotting the overthrow of a slut really takes it out of you, and Sakura was pooped, so she plopped down on her bed, taking a deep, relaxing breath and starring at the ceiling. She thought absently of how, were she laying on Ukon's bed, she would be starring up at posters. How does he sleep with them all? she wondered silently.

Speaking of Ukon…

Sakura looked over at her CD player, which was on her nightstand. On it was the CD Ukon had burned for her. He told me to listen to the last track… Wonder why… She shrugged it off, getting her head phones and plugging them in. She popped the CD in and went to the last track, pressing play and laying back on her pillows.

She was greeted with a low, peaceful piano solo. But, at first, Sakura wasn't fooled. After all, Toxicity had had a soft beginning, and that one had ended as a screamer. However, as the lyrics started playing, she forgot to see if it was a screamer (it wasn't) as she just listened.

I'm so scared that you will see
All the weakness inside of me
I'm so scared of letting go
That the pain I've hid will show

I know you want to hear me speak
But I'm afraid that if I start to
I'll never stop

I want you to know
You belong in my life
I love the hope
I see in your eyes
For you I would fly
At least I would try
For you I'll take
The last flight out

I'm afraid that
You will leave
As my secrets
Have been revealed
In my dreams
You'll always stay
Every breathing moment from now

I know you want to hear me speak
But I'm afraid that if I start to
I'll never stop

I want you to know
You belong in my life
I love the hope
I see in your eyes
For you I would fly
At least I would try
For you I'll take
The last flight out

I cannot hold back
The truth no more
I let you wait too long
Although it's hard and scares me so
A life without you scares me more

I want you to know
You belong in my life
I love the hope
I see in your eyes
For you I would fly
At least I would try
For you I'll take
The last flight out

(Next day: Monday)

Shizuka looked half-dead when Sakura opened the front door. "Time to go," Shizuka said through a yawn.

"Ok, just a sec." Sakura went into the living room and got her bag, then went into the kitchen, getting the large, tin foil covered plate her mom had set out, calling up the stairs, "I'm going, mom!"

"Ok, bye, sweetie, have a good day!"

"Wuzzat?" Shizuka asked sleepily, pointing to the covered plate.

"Present for Ukon from my mom," Sakura answered as they reached the limo. Opening the door, she found Kimimaro leaning his head against the window of the other side, and Ukon in the corner, half-asleep with a Styrofoam cup of java in one hand (H-R: "Cup. Come. To. Mouth……please?"). He cracked an eye open when she scooted in next to him, and gave her a tired smile. He took a swig of java (which Sakura suspected was black) and his eyes opened a little more.

"…Eh?" He pointed to the covered plate. Apparently, he wasn't awake enough to utilize the human language.

"Oh, my mom made it for you," she answered, putting it on his lap.

He lifted the tin foil a little and peeked inside. He grinned a little. "Cookies…"

Kimimaro suddenly perked up. "Cookies?" He looked around.

Ukon stopped, a cookie already half-way to his mouth. "My cookie."

Kimimaro gave a little pout, then said casually, "Hey, Shizuka, you remember when we were five and you lost your security bunny?"

Ukon twitched.

She looked at him. "Yeah…"

"Well, it's a funny story, actually, see, U—"

"Fine, you can have one." Ukon held the plate of cookies out to Kimimaro, who took one.

Thankfully for Ukon, Shizuka was too tired to even remember what Kimimaro had said.

(When they got to the Hyuuga estate)

"Where are they?" Shizuka asked, looking out the window of the limo. Normally, Hinata and Neji were standing by the door, waiting for the limo to pick them up, but today, they weren't there. "Are we early?"

"No, they're late," Ukon answered. He was riding in the limo with them, with Sakura under one arm and a cup of java in the other.

"I'll be right back." Shizuka opened the car door and got out, closing it again and going up to the house. She rang the doorbell and waited. As she did, she heard voices carrying through the door.

"I CAN'T FIND MY BACK PACK!"

"WHERE ARE MY WAFFLES?"

"HINATA, WILL YOU PLEASE HURRY UP IN THE SHOWER?"

"NEJI HONEY, DID YOU WASH BEHIND YOUR EARS?"

"WAFFLES, MOM!"

Shizuka started to back away when a little, dark-haired girl opened the door, looking up at her. Behind the girl, Shizuka could see people running back and forth across the hallway.

There was a moment of silence between the two girls.

"NEJI-NII-SAN, YOUR GIRLFRIEND'S HERE!"

Neji suddenly appeared behind the girl, a pop-up waffle in his mouth, and shoved her away. He looked up at Shizuka and held up a finger for her to wait, then disappeared again.

Shizuka waited for about three minutes, watching people run back and forth.

Neji appeared again, pop-up waffle still in his mouth, but this time he had Hinata with him, as well as their book bags. Hinata's hair was a little wet, and she looked slightly flustered, but they said (or rather, Hinata said) they were ready to go.

"Well where's mine?" Shizuka asked, gesturing to the waffle.

Neji rolled his eyes and disappeared again for about a minute, then reappeared with a waffle for Shizuka, which he gave to her.

Satisfied at last, Shizuka led them back to the limo.

"Waffles!" Ukon said excitedly when he saw them.

"No," Neji said firmly, taking said waffle out of his mouth for a moment.

Ukon glared, taking a sip of java. He wasn't quite awake yet.

For the most part, the ride was silent. Kimimaro had fallen asleep leaning against the window, Ukon was watching TV on the little TV in the corner, and Sakura (who was still under Ukon's arm) was talking quietly to Hinata. Neji was starring out the window, waffle long-finished, and Shizuka was looking at her hands, sitting between him and Kimimaro. Then, rather suddenly (but unnoticed by the rest of the car) she put her head on Neji's shoulder.

"Sorry."

He looked down at her. "What?"

She held out a bento box wrapped in a blue cloth with soccer balls on it. (H-R: Peace offering!)

He looked down at it. "For me?" he asked, pointing to himself.

She nodded. "And I can cook, so don't bring that argument up."

He highly doubted that, but he took it anyway, so she wouldn't get offended and start hitting him.

When they arrived at school, sure enough, as soon as Ukon stepped out of the car, he was hit hand in the chest by the whirling ball of energy that was Yamiko.

"Ohayo, Uk-kun!" she squealed, throwing her arms around his arm.

"…" Ukon gave Sakura a look that said 'help me!'

Sakura suddenly clamped down on Ukon's other arm, giving Yamiko a haughty look. "What are you doing to my boyfriend, you mean girl?" (Pout)

Yamiko's plastic smile faded. "Boyfriend?" She looked up at Ukon.

Well, if we're making it official now… "Yeah. Boyfriend," he said firmly.

The traffic coming out of the limos came to a dead halt.

Insert ten minutes of silence.

"You're joking," Yamiko said finally.

"Are these the eyes of a joker?" Ukon asked coldly, glaring at her and pointing to his eyes.

Everyone had to admit, they weren't.

Suddenly, Temari appeared at Yamiko's elbow, pulling the brown-haired girl off of Ukon. "Leave him alone for once," Temari said, sounding harassed.

"B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B—"

"Let's go, Kankurou," Temari said to her older brother, who was standing behind her. They stalked off, dragging Yamiko after them.

"…What just happened here?" the near-comatose Shizuka asked, frowning.

Tap-tap.

"Huh?" Shizuka turned. "Oh, hey, Gaara." She turned around again.

Pause.

Double-take.

"Gaara!" she cried, suddenly wide awake as she glomped down on the red-haired boy. "How's it goin'?"

"You know him?" Neji asked curiously.

"Yeah, since pre-k," Shizuka said with a grin, throwing an arm around Gaara's shoulders. "We're like this." She showed him her fingers, twisted together. Turning back to Gaara, she repeated her previous question after his health.

Blank stare.

"Oh, that's ok," Shizuka said reassuringly, patting Gaara on the back. "You could still be hearing voices."

"…"

"Oh, really, well, how are the voices doing?"

"…"

"Oh, well, tell them I'm sorry."

Neji turned to Kimimaro. "Is it just me, or is he not saying anything?"

Kimimaro shrugged. "Oh, he never talks; she just always seems to know what he's saying."

Neji sweat-dropped. Weirdos, he thought, inching away from them. They're all freakin' weirdos…

(Geometry/Homeroom)

"WHAT?" Ino shouted, sitting bolt-upright in her seat.

"Shh!" Sakura shushed her, looking around frantically. Thankfully, everyone in the class was used to Ino by now, so no one paid attention. She knew it was a mistake beginning her statement with "I have a boyfriend."

Ino whirled around to stare at Sasuke. "Sasuke-kun, you are Sakura are going out?" she cried.

He gave her a haughty/surprised look. "No."

"SAKURA HAS A BOYFRIEND WHO ISN'T SASUKE-KUN?" Ino shrieked.

Everyone in the class (and school) heard that. Sakura looked around warily after clapping a hand over Ino's mouth.

Naruto and Lee whirled around, tears pouring down their cheeks. "Sakura!" they both blubbered.

Kiba made an "about time" noise and turned around again.

Chouji ate his chips rather faster then usual.

Shino had no comment.

Shikamaru slept on.

SNG doesn't feel like naming everyone else.

"Who is it?" Ino asked, in a calmer tone, now that she was over the first shock.

Sakura sighed. This wasn't going to be easy. Ino was easier to handle when she wasn't in the know. "You know that guy who I was paired up with for the race?" she said, slowly.

"The one who got the carnations?"

Sakura nodded.

"Yeah. What about him?"

Sakura sighed again. "His name is Ukon, and he's my boyfriend."

Ino was quiet for a moment. "Oh, well done," she said, looking genuinely pleased with her friend.

"…Huh?" Sakura had been bracing herself for yelling.

Sasuke had been hoping for yelling.

"What?" both said together, starring at the blonde.

Ino shrugged. "He's pretty hot. And he's a senior. And seniors are mature."

"…Not nessesarily," Sakura corrected, thinking of Itachi (yeah, Ukon told her what happened).

"So he isn't mature?" Ino asked curiously.

"I didn't say that, I just meant that not all seniors are mature."

"GOOD MORNING CLASS, AND HOW ARE WE ON THIS FINE MONDAY IN SEPTEMBER? IT IS THE SECOND WEEK OF SCHOOL AND I HOPE YOU ARE READY TO LEARN!" Gai projected.

(Biology)

Biology was actually rather uneventful. They took yet another test (Kurenai seemed to like them), and Sakura actually remembered her notebook this time.

That was about all that happened.

After class, Neji was waiting for them, and they all (Neji, Sakura, Shizuka and Kimimaro) made their way to the stairwell through the wads of people.

On the way to the stairs, they passed Itachi, who started to smirk, but stopped when he received death glares from Neji, Sakura and Kimimaro. Shizuka starred at her feet, not even looking at him, as Sakura steered her to the stairs.

"Forget him," Neji advised as they headed towards Iruka's class.

"Yeah…" Shizuka gave a small smile that disappeared almost as soon as it appeared.

"Come on, smile!" Sakura cried, making a funny face.

"…"

"Make this girl smile," Kimimaro said to Ukon when they entered the class.

"Actually, I think smiling's a mute point now," Ukon said grimly, pointing to the overhead.

They looked.

"Ok, everyone get in your new seats according to this chart!" Iruka said cheerfully. "These will be your new seats for the next three weeks."

The five friends looked at the chart for a few minutes.

There was a moment of silence.

"I think a group hug is in order before we split up to the far corners of the class," Ukon said solemnly.

Said group hug was initiated, and they spread out. Ukon was placed in the far left corner in the very back. Sakura was placed diagonally from him, in the right corner of the front row. Shizuka was down the row from Sakura, and Neji was in the back row, closer to the right of the room, and Kimimaro was smack dab in the middle.

Sakura turned to look at Ukon, who gave her a weak grin and a thumbs up, to which she gave a half-smile. It's gonna be a long way till lunch, she thought, turning back to the front as Iruka began the lesson.

When lunch finally did come, the five of them instantly flocked to Ukon's corner, since his was farthest away from the front of the classroom (Neji's corner was overrun by preps).

While everyone else was getting out their lunches, Neji started to get out his bag lunch when he remembered the bento Shizuka had made him. She wasn't really paying attention to him now, but he just knew that if he didn't eat it, she'd find out.

Somehow.

So, Neji gave his bag lunch to Kimimaro, even though the pale-haired boy already had a lunch (the guy's a black hole for food, dude) and took out the bento, unwrapping it carefully.

Suddenly, he was beginning to see the truth in the bomb theory.

However, it was not a bomb. It was food. Somehow, she'd managed to make it look like a cartoon frog, with a rice ball wrapped in lettuce as the head, a large pork dumpling as the body, and baby corn for the legs. For eyes, she'd used hard-boiled eggs. He might have thought it looked cute if the situation suddenly did not feel right.

I am about to eat an amphibian, he thought, breaking apart his chopsticks. Deciding the pork bun would be the least dangerous, he broke off a piece and put it in his mouth, chewing carefully.

(BARF!) Oh shit! Neji clamping his mouth shut to keep what he knew would come out, in. I can't eat this! He glanced over at Kimimaro; his bag lunch was still untouched. Maybe if he switched the lunches now, they wouldn't notice… Kimimaro had to have eaten the stuff before, right?

"Is it good?" Shizuka asked curiously, turning to look at him.

Busted! "Yep." Neji gave her a grin, taking another bite of the pork bun. (Barf)

"Good." Shizuka went back to her conversation with Sakura.

Neji looked around frantically, trying to find a means of disposing of the 'food' without anyone noticing.

Ukon, who was sitting next to Neji, noticed the look and snuck him a cookie. "Here. Cleanse," the senior told the sophomore under his breath. "It actually does help. Trust me."

Neji gave him a skeptical look, but took the cookie anyway, since Ms. Hanuro's cookies were really good. To his amazement, after one bite, the bad taste left his mouth. Whoa!

And that was how Neji survived lunch that day: with a cookie and Ukon's vow of silence.

"Liebe," Ukon said slowly, enounciating the word.

"Lee-ba," Sakura said.

"…No, liebe."

"Leebee."

"Liebe."

"Leeva?"

"Liebe."

"Looba?"

"You're doing this to annoy me, aren't you?"

"Is it working?"

"Yes."

"Yay." Sakura examined a finger sandwich.

Ukon rolled his eyes, munching on the bento Sakura had made him.

Shizuka, meanwhile, was having a "conversation" with Gaara, who had appeared at her elbow a few minutes ago.

"…who knows someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows Tom Cruise." Shizuka beamed.

"…"

"Well, I know he's not your favorite actor."

"…"

"I was making a point!"

"…"

"Well, you don't have to bite my head off!"

"…"

"You know what, shut up." Shizuka turned away.

"How long has she been doing this?" Neji whispered to Kimimaro, who shrugged.

"Since pre-k, why?"

"…No reason." Neji shivered slightly. "So, are they friends?" He gestured to Gaara and Shizuka.

"The bestest!" Shizuka cried, overhearing. She threw an arm around Gaara and gave him a big, bone-crushing hug.

Twitch-twitch. "Oh."

(Gym)

"…And that's why I need you guys' help." Sakura made a pleading face.

Temari laughed a little. "Ha. Sounds fun."

Sakura exhaled. She had had a feeling Temari might be a problem. They were in the girl's locker room, and she had assembled every girl in her class (except Yamiko) and explained her plan.

"So, what, we just give her this stuff?" Ino looked down at the thing in her hand. "It seems kind of simple."

"Not if you know what's in them." Sakura winked.

"This seems rather immature," said a black-haired kid towards the back.

"Oh, be quiet, Haku." Sakura rolled her eyes. (H-R: AAAAHHH! GLOMPS HAKU!)

Haku flushed. In all honesty, he was not supposed to be here. Not "here" as in, in the girls' locker room; "here" as in, in this gym class. But sand-nin-gurl had put him here, so therefore, he was here. Oh how he hated those sadistic writers.

"So, are we clear?" Sakura asked.

All the girls (and Haku) nodded. "Yep!"

"Ok. Let's move out!"


Okies, review responses… 12 this time, ne? Oh well, that's cool. It's a lot more then I ever got for my other fics! O.o Oro…

RedLotusNin and IceHunterNin: I'm gonna call you guys RLN and IHN from now on, Okies? It's too much to type every time… Anyway, TenTen's voice annoys me in the anime. She's so whiny-ish! I used a dictionary for those adjectives… I'm too lazy to think of them. And she's pretty much too dumb to think of them, but oh well. Kimi-kun is cute in my fic because he is Sakura and Shizuka's pet, dammit! Lol. I DEMAND THE PICTURE! DEMAND IT!

Dragonman180: Dude, I would take the Kimi-plushie even if I had nightmares about it! But then again, I am a fan girl and you are not. Lol. (Feels bad for putting Neji through such suffering) Oh well. Anyway (Oo, my ramen is done!) (Eats) Yum… Oh man now I forgot was I was going to say… ramen has that effect on me. (thinks for a while) No, seriously, put in five minutes of silence here. Oh yeah, I remember: Do you have any kind of IM service at all? Cuz I wanna talk to you, dammit, you are cool! (I think I already asked and you already answered but oh well)

xl-twisted-lx: Ohh… I see. I thought it was from a manga or something. Silly me. Anyways, hope you enjoyed this one, too!

Hinata's Biggest Fan Boy: There was cuddling! Cuddling counts as mushy, dammit! seeing your name reminded me, I need to put Hinata in it more… she'll be a bigger character soon… maybe…

Rini Rika: O.o (snatchs Kyuubi plushie and throws Kimi plushie at you) YAY! MY LIFE'S WISH HAS BEEN GRANTED! Kyuubi: You already have me in your head, dammit.

Kie-san: Actually, most of your speech is rambling, too… Lol, just kidding. RAMBLING IS GOOD! TenTen had no personality because she sucks, dammit. Ukon was descriptive because he hadn't been able to tell anyone that stuff, and if you hold stuff like that in for a long time, you tend to just pour it all out. I don't think he meant to be descriptive. I feel bad for Neji-kun too… Snif. But not enough to stop torturing him, lol. Neji's mom owns!

KageNoKatana: I put Gaara in as a bigger character (Shizuka's friend); are you happy? I meant to send you something! I did! But I was between e-mail addresses and I couldn't. Sowwy! I WUB YOU!

Ginka: Jackie must die. Really, only 14 pages? Wow. This chapter took 22 pages on 10 font… hmm. Oh well. TY for correcting me… I can't really tell the difference when I type.

Inusaiyan: Did I punish her enough for doing that to him? Lol. I know girls in my grade who do that too. H-R says I'm really good at writing stuff like that, but I would never be able to do it in real life. Well… at least, not in secret. She's right, I'd probably crack and tell her what I was doing.

Anonymous: You know what, I thought of putting him in there as soon as I read your review, but he wouldn't fit in the van! (not enough seats) And… ARE YOU CALLING ME A LESBIAN? I am NOT a lesbian! I have nothing against lesbians, but I am not a lesbian! I just know guys who had girls ask them out and not take no for an answer, that's all… Jeez. Sorry for biting your head off, but… yeesh.

Riyo Shiban: I put Haku in! (Kenshin grin) I love Haku, too… He like, rocks! I have so many AMVs for him, I can't even count. O.o You stole my adjectives…

LiveLoveLaugh: SOAD AND COAL CHAMBER OWN ALL! HELL YEAH! I is glad you like it, that I am! (Kenshin grin) I tried to send you the pic, but your email didn't show up, but I will send it promptly, ok? I agree with your descriptions of the characters. Lol. Kimimaro is everyone's baby. I'm glad you like Shizuka (People tend to do that). She is always in character because, quite frankly, she is me! Lol. No, seriously, we act exactly the same. Except I don't have hot guys trailing behind me… she is so lucky.

H-R commented in this chapter... mumble grumble...