disclaimer: We solemly swear that we are up to no good. But, we are not going to you know do that stuff that requires disclaimers. As in, I do not fake credit from J.K. Rowling

I wrote this with desert dancer in biology class one day. We will continue according to your reviews. By the way, we find flames hilarious and we will laugh at you.

"You want us to sell lemonade!" yelped Draco.

"Yes dear. I am currently off to shag the daylights out of Professor Snape and you all need a distraction," calmly answered Professor Dumbledore. "Oh, and try not to bloody yourselves too much," he added as an afterthought.

"I always wondered why old crackpot Albus trusted Snape with the Order's deepest, darkest secrets," Harry muttered. So an unlikely group found themselves setting up a cardboard lemonade stand out in front of the school. You know, the school no one can see because of all the spells and enchantments on it. So Draco Malfoy, the sex god of Slytherin; Harry Potter, the-boy-who-annoyingly-enough-keeps-living; Hermione the pothead, Luna the loony, Ron the Gryffindor fag queen, Neville the bumblebee and Ginny the bisexual all gathered under the bloody stump of the Whomping Willow.

Yes, it bleeds.

Eventually all cups were filled with warm lemon yellowy liquid sitting on a table Neville conjured up.

"So what do we do now?" Neville asked.

"I don't rightly know," Ginny answered.

"Hey everyone, everyone meaning Luna and Ginny, let's go make out!" Hermione squeaked in an oddly hyperactive manner.

"What!" Ron leapt up, lust and anger in his eyes, "I've had my eyes on you for a while now!"

"Oh shut up Ron, everyone knows that you and I were meant to be. I mean like come on, Ginny's bi, Luna's well Luna, and Hermione's a pothead 24/7." Neville butted in seeing how he could channel Ron's passion towards himself. "Let's go make out."

Said people stood up and left for various broom closets. That left our two favorite characters together.

"So… how was you're erm summer vacation?" Harry asked tentatively, biting his fingernails.

"Summer vacation begins next week," drawled Draco, obviously bored.

"Oh, that's right, er, um…" stammered Harry unable to find something intelligible to say.

Suddenly, the tension was too horrible and resulted in Harry's blurting of

"Did you know that monkey's are purple!" as an attempt to break the silence.

"Really now? And I suppose gorillas are pink." The sarcasm practically dripped from Draco's talented tongue. Just thinking about that tongue made Harry blush.

"You know for a boy who's repeatedly defeated the terror of the wizarding world, you're actually quite the idiot. Of course, I always knew that, like the way I know everything, but really you are seriously pathetic." blabbered Draco in a rather sexy manner. An awkward moment of silence engulfed the pair. Once again, Harry felt the overwhelming need to break the silence. Then an odd sensation came over him. He started to feel hot and wanted to reach out and touch Malfoy's shimmering Venus divinely shaved skin. It really was not safe to leave Harry alone with Draco because once more,

"Everyone else is off shagging each other." Harry asked hurriedly. "Wannagofindabroomcloset?"

And pointless words came out of his mouth.

Draco had the utmost disgusted look on his face. "Me. The posh, polished, aristocratic, a fine specimen of the Malfoy family, shag you, the boy-who-just-won't-die? Don't think so."

"Oh," Harry's face fell and rambled. "I mean, I don't care for guys, it's just we don't have anything else to do."

"Oh sure," scoffed Draco.

Just then, soft rain came pitter pattering around them.

"Oh shit! My hair, my hair!" Draco shrieked.

"Just get inside and shut up!" Harry ordered in his hot, sexy voice.

They ran inside and finally took a look at each other. Two soaking, muscle clad boys were staring at each other with stormy eyes.

Damn, if only he was a girl he'd be so damn sexy! Harry thought.

Damn, if only he knew that I'm a girl I'd shag him senseless. Draco was telling himself.

"What!" Harry yelped, taken aback. "What do you mean you're a girl?"

"What?" Draco countered, panicking not really able to come up with a good response.

"I'm an occlumens," Harry answered, hurriedly in explanation, "What do you mean?"

Then in an incredulous and dramatic voice, "Is Draco Malfoy a girl?"

"No," Draco scoffed.

Realization dawned on Harry. "Whatever you say… Slytherin Princess."

Laughing manically, Harry hurried off toward the Gryffindor dormitory.

Fuming, Draco sent a few spiteful curses after Harry and stalked off to the dungeons.

Harry got to the portrait of the Fat Lady and gave her the password. The painting swung forward and Harry stepped in.