Chapter 8
Emily's POV
Just tell him the truth.
The words ran through my head like a broken record as I stood outside Jack's door.
I should knock now.
My hand did not seem to want to meet the barrier that kept the truth out of Jack's reach.
Okay, it's now or never. Just suck it up and knock on the damn door.
Before I could knock, the door opened.
"Hey, beautiful," Jack greeted me with a smile. I bet that smile could light up a room. You wouldn't even need a lamp, it's so bright. And he looked good, too. I guess he just got out of the shower. His hair was wet and slicked back, and he was wearing black track pants and a white t-shirt. He was definitely more comfortable than I was.
"Hey, I was just about to knock, but you opened it before I got the chance to," I rambled for no particular reason. Yeah, just tell him the color of your underwear next. You've told him everything else.
Oh, but I haven't.
"Finish everything?" Jack asked.
"Blue," I blurted out, mentally kicking myself.
"What's blue?" Jack questioned bewilderedly.
"What? Nothing's blue," I covered. Maybe he'd think he was just hearing things. Yeah right, blurting out the color of my underwear could not be construed as a slip of the hearing.
"Are you okay?" Jack inquired. "You seem a little jumpy."
"I'm fine," I replied. "Just got about ninety thousand things running through my head. Hence the reason for my yelling out random colors."
"Anything you want to talk about?"
"Yeah, actually. Jack, I wasn't entirely honest with you," I started.
"There was a reason for yelling out blue?" he asked, hopefully joking.
"No, but that's not what I'm talking about. I mean the other night when I told you that the reason I didn't call or write back was just because I was panicked about Robbie," I explained. This is getting tougher and tougher the longer he looks at me. "See, the thing is that's only half true."
"What are you getting at?"
"About a week after I broke things off with Robbie, I found out I was pregnant," I told him. You have no idea how good it felt to get that off my chest.
"So you and Robbie have a kid," Jack said. His eyes started to look cloudy.
"Robbie didn't know about it," I defensively replied.
"How could you not tell me you have a kid?" he spat out.
"Jack, would you just listen?" I pleaded. "In my fifth month, I went into extremely premature labor. I…lost the baby, Jack."
"Oh god," he whispered, moving to sit next to me on his bed.
"After that, I felt like it was a punishment. Like this is what I get for have sex before I'm married and for kissing you when I was in a relationship. I just…I couldn't deal with facing you or Robbie after that. I couldn't deal with facing anyone," I told him, breaking down. I felt his hand rub small circles over my back as I held my head in my hands. "Do you know how many times I'd go to Boston and drive past your dorm, hoping to get up the courage to go in and talk to you?"
"Emma, it wasn't a punishment," he said soothingly. I just looked at him and snorted. "Honestly. It just wasn't meant to be."
"Ya know what's funny? I didn't even want it at first, but I completely warmed up to the idea of being a mom. I wanted to be everything to that baby that my own mother wasn't to me. I wanted that baby so badly, and then it was just snatched away from me," I responded through sobs. At that point I just wanted to be in his arms. Who cared if his roommate walked in.
"Trust me, babe, you'll get to be a mom again, and you'll be great," Jack whispered.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner," I said into his chest.
"Emma, that was one of those things you needed time on. I wouldn't expect you to have blurted that out that night," Jack replied, tilting my chin up so that our eyes could meet. "There's no need for you to be sorry."
"What ever did I do to deserve you, Jack O'Callahan?" I questioned before kissing him.
"Cheated on McClanahan," he replied after pulling away. "Hell, I didn't even see that coming."
"How could you not see that coming? You kissed me," I said, smacking his arm.
"Yeah, yeah. Semantics, Morrison," Jack retorted, standing up. Holding his hands out to me, I took them and he pulled me up. "Let's get out of here. Go do something fun."
"Fun? What's fun?" I questioned. "Fun does not exist in our world anymore. You've entered the seventh layer of hell by signing on to play for Herb. I'm surprised that three letter word hasn't been erased from your vocabulary."
"Yeah, whatever. Fun. Now," he commanded.
"Aye, aye, Captain Jack," I replied, giving him my best military salute. Thanks, Dad, for that skill.
As we walked out the door, he stopped to ask, "What did blue mean?"
"You're just gonna have to find out," I replied slyly as I walked past him.
Jack's POV
That was a bombshell I wasn't expecting. Who'd have thought Mac would knock his girlfriend up. And better yet, never know it. I can't imagine what it's like to keep that to yourself for three years.
"Hey Jack, what are we doing at the rink?" Emily inquired, staring at the ice like a deer in headlights.
"Oh, well I figured we'd build a fire, roast marshmallows, that kind of thing," I replied facetiously. "I was thinking we could go skating."
"Haha, I don't skate," Emily stated, shaking her head. "I make Bambi look like Dorothy Hamill."
"Bambi the deer?" I asked.
"No, Bambi the blonde who's always in the gym with you guys," she replied straightly, yet equally sarcastic. "Yes, Bambi the deer. Not that I've ever actually seen the movie. My mom wouldn't let us."
"You found out that blonde's name? Bah told me he'd been after that chick for months just to find out her name. How'd you get it?" I questioned. Leave it to Emily to find this kind of thing out though.
"I had a psych class with her sophomore year. She could hardly spell her own name, let alone Freud's," she replied, rolling her eyes.
"Well, that's good to know. Now, lace up the skates," I ordered, knowing this witty banter was her way of avoiding the skating.
"I don't know how," she stated.
"You and Mac dated for how long, and you don't know how to lace up a pair of skates," I muttered as I knelt in front of her to tie up the strings.
"You're gonna hold my hand, right?" she asked, as she wobbled over to the ice.
"Yes, I'll hold your hand. You fall, I fall," I reassured her, taking both her hands in mine as she stumbled, getting used to the skates and the ice. "Not bad, Morrison."
"Liar," she grumbled as she almost tripped over her own foot. "Are we done yet?"
"No, we're not done yet. We've gone five feet," I replied, rolling my eyes.
"Don't roll your eyes at me. This isn't fun," she said, swatting at my arm. Dumb move, because with that, she fell to the ice pulling me down with her.
"Should have held my hand," I chastised. "You'd be upright right now if you didn't let go to hit me."
"Anyone ever tell you you're annoying?" she inquired, pulling herself up with the help of the wall.
"Anyone ever tell you you're difficult?" I shot back, standing up next to her. I took her hands in mine again and tried to get her to skate with me.
"And here I was thinking you'd rather find out what blue meant," Emily said, looking at me with mischief in her gray eyes.
"Well, then it's time to hit the showers," I replied, pulling her off the ice with me.
"OC!" she shrieked. "This is not taking it slow!"
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