Chapter 1
Loneliness
Darkness. It had swallowed me up. "SAKUYA!" I turned around to see Aine. I wanted to welcome her with open arms and with complete love. But I couldn't. I turned away from her. She hadn't trusted me, so why should I trust her with my heart? What if she were to shatter it again? No, I wouldn't let her. "What do you want, Aine," I asked coldly. I could feel the shock in her voice as she spoke, shattered, "I came to say sorry. I should've trusted you! It was just to good to be true! I took it too seriously! Please forgive me!" I turned back to her to see HER cutting while on the ground. "Stop it!" Why did I want her to stop? I saw her eyes look at me. So much sadness. I've only seen me with that sadness. "No! Stop it!" I grabbed her arm and threw the knife far away. I shook it and yelled, "Aine! You're not stupid! Stop this mess! THIS isn't for you!" Aine looked at me shocked, "But...if I can't, why should you?" "Because I AM stupid," I said coldly again. I felt her embrace me, but I pushed her away. "I can't forgive you, but you have to come to work at 1:00 tomorrow. Don't forget, Miss Yukimura." I walked off into the darkness, hearing her cry behind me.
I sat up as the sun shone through. I ran to the window and closed the curtains in an attempt to escape the light. "It's not nice, is it," I heard Makato ask. "Yeah, it just reminds me of the pain of seeing her again. She's still IS our lyricist," I answered. I turned around to be met with darkness again. My eyes began to adjust to it, and I walked calmly to my couch. I placed my head in my hands. It was happening again. I pulled out my pocket knife and placed it in my left arm's skin. The pain overwhelmed my body as I forgot my troubles. The only things that I could think about were the knife, the blood, and the pain. Aine didn't matter at the moment. I put the knife back as I saw the blood drop to the ground. I clapped making my arm hurt worse. The lights came on, showing the blood drip to the floor. Thank God, I didn't have carpet or it would've been obvious to the whole band that I was cutting. Lucifer would never understand my problems. They've never been in or out of love. They've had groupies, but they never had their feeling touched. We're too cold or too distant to the world. I know my new attitude will affect Lucifer's popularity, but we'll be like before: Lonely.
Loneliness. The word made my body tingle. I can't stand being alone. That's why I came up with Makato. He was what gave me strength to live. If you could call him a "he." He's more of an "it." "It" is a figment of my imagination, even though I hate to admit it. I mean, you don't talk to darkness for nothing.
I began to feel weak. I must have lost a lot of blood. I looked down at my arm to see it bleeding freely. "Why doesn't it stop," I asked aloud. "Who cares? Go get some help," Makato yelled worriedly. I listened and got up. This only made me feel worse. I wavered to the door and saw Yuki and Atsuro ready to knock on the door. I pushed passed them and ran out. I felt weaker and weaker. Nothing was left as my hearing quit and my sight blackened. I was dead. I HAD to be.
"Mr. Ohkouchi? Are you alright," I heard beside me. "Who are you," I asked. "I'm the girl from next door. I found you outside with Atsuro and Yuki. I HAD to help, so I rushed you over to the hospital," I heard. My eye sight was still a little blury. Finally, my eyes came back to normal. The girl that sat in front of me was a girl of mid-back, black hair and amber eyes. She had on a black shirt with a broken heart in the center; black jeans; and a leather coat. I rose feeling a sharp feeling in my arm. I realized why I was here in the first place. "Why did you help me," I asked coldly. I could feel shock in her eyes. She looked down and said, "Because I know what it's like to...cut. Something terrible must've happened to you if you were to cut so deeply." Now it was my turn to be shocked. "How..." Before I could finish, she rolled her sleeve up to show many scars. She looked at me and said, "But, hey, my reason was really nothing. Just a guy...What about you?" I looked at my bandaged arm and said, "A girl..." Aine... I looked at her and saw shock in her eyes. Why am I even telling you this, I thought. She nodded and got up. "I'll be leaving you to rest," she said while giving a slight bow. I pushed my arm forward and caught her arm with my hand. Pain shot up my arm and into the rest of my body. "Don't...leave," I uttered out. She turned around with even more shock then before. "W...why?" "I don't want to be alone," I replied. She blushed and sat on the edge of the bed. I looked at her and asked, "What's your name?" She looked back at me and replied, "Urainia Muletsue." I nodded and asked, "That's not a normal name. What does it mean?" She smiled and said, "Well, Urainia means 'Pain from the Rain' while Muletsue means 'Storm'." I nodded and looked into her eyes. Red, they might've been, but I could see pain. Pain that I could've never understood. She looked away from me, and I could tell that she was about to cry. She must've been thinking of that pain. "What's the matter," I asked. She looked back with teary eyes and said, "Nobody has ever treated me this well before." I looked at her with shock. So much pain... I could never feel that. Nobody should.
Hours went by and Urainia and myself became more acquainted. I nicknamed her Rain, so she would have to think of pain, just the light rain. She would laugh at how stupid my jokes were, or how stupid the band was. She made me feel as if Aine was here again. Only she wasn't. I realized the bruises on the girls legs, arms, and neck. I touched one on her neck, and she winced from the pain. "It's okay. I won't hurt you," I said. It was a bruise, but to me it looked close to a gash. "Who did this," I asked. She looked at me with sadness, "Myself." How could you do that? This is close to a gash. You shouldn't do that. But I shouldn't talk. I cut, after all. I looked at it, amazed. I wouldn't dare say anything that I just thought. "So, Rain. You're a typical seventeen year old that is picked on by the people at school. I think I can fix that," I said. She looked at me shocked and asked, "How?" I smiled at her and said, "You'll see."
That night, I went back home. Makato didn't come. I was alone, yet I wasn't. The darkness wasn't so dark. "Now that Rain's here, I can be happy. What if she breaks my heart, too," I said aloud. I walked to the couch and lied there. "This is where I really sit now. There's no point for a bed," I chuckled to myself. I clapped. Now only a little pain came with the contact. The lights switched on as a bang came with it. "Who is it," I asked. "Rain! Please open the door," I heard behind the door. I opened the door and saw her crying. "What's wrong," I asked. She embraced me and said, "It's horrible. I was just..." Now I noticed that her clothing was torn. I looked outside the door and saw a man walking down the hall. He was coming toward my residence. I looked at the shaking Rain before me. "He tried to...rape you," I asked. Those words made my mouth dry with anger. She nodded with tears. I placed her on the couch and walked to the door. The young man had come to the door and asked, "Hello, is Urainia home?" I nodded and said, "Yeah, but she doesn't want any company." I wanted to punch the living daylights out of him. "That's not a problem. It's an important business matter," he said. "Rape is a business matter," I asked. He glared at me and said, "You are in no place to tell me how to make my money." He disgusted me already. I flung my fist into his face, pushing him down with impact. "DON'T YOU DARE COME NEAR HER AGAIN! MAKE YOUR BUSINESS ON PROSTITUTES IF YOU'RE SO FUCKING OBSSESSED WITH SEX," I yelled angrily. He looked at me frightened. He rose from the ground. "You shouldn't be talking. Look at what you did to Aine." Now I recognized him. He was one of the guys that tried to rape Aine. I stepped outside and kicked him in the nuts. "I thought I told you to leave what was mine alone!" He fell over and I walked back inside to see Rain on the couch crying. I closed the door and walked over to her. I wrapped my arms around her and said calmly, "He's gone. He won't bother you again. You don't diserve anymore pain." She pulled away and looked into my blue eyes. Every girl does that. "Thank you, Sakuya." She wrapped her arms around my waist as I placed my left hand on her head. "You're quite welcome," I chuckled. I picked her up bridal style and brought her into my bedroom. "Here, you sleep here. I'll be on the couch. See you tomorrow." Before she could protest, I walked out. The day was long and hard. Thank God it was over.
