Because I am feeling in a great cheerful mood (and there were a couple questions still remaining), I am going to put a key in this chapter. This way, you can check up with how you are doing on names and characters.

The Sir Prince Axel is Joey Wheeler

Tanner (Ernest) Clothier is Tristan Taylor

Earl de Vlin is Duke Devlin

Sir Blaydelot is ? (name based on Lancelot; outside character-sorry)

Kun (Billy Bob) is Yugi Moto

Sama-san-dono is Yami Yugi (the other Yugi)

Yor Love is Mai Valentine

Nameless monarchs are no one

Yesah Gruff is Noah Kaiba ("yes" to replace "no")

Muggy Gruff is Mokuba Kaiba

Put'oh Gruff is Seto Kaiba

Pirate captain (learning name soon) is Yami Bakura (Spirit of Millennium Ring)

Barleyo is Ryou Bakura ("Rye" replaced with another grain-"barley")

Chapter 7 Yes, Don't Worry, We Are Still with the Ship

Dripping onto the pirate ship, Axel looked around in surprise. "Where'd everyone go? They couldn't all have fallen into the sea, could they?" He glanced across the water and saw a bunch of stripe-shirted pirates' backs. So, there was no doubt he was on the right ship.

"Hello?" he called. Then, he began to wander around.

Now, the pirate captain was not dumb. He might have been dead and slightly deaf, but he certainly wasn't dumb. He had planned for all the pirates to launch the attack. After all, there was no reason for anyone to board his ship. Why should he worry about that when the two ships were tied together with no guarding it? And really, why should he leave someone behind to guard Barleyo—it wasn't as if the young man would try desperately worming himself away and escape. It wasn't like he had ever indicated he did not like pirating.

Okay, the pirate captain was dumb.

Sounds came from below the floor, and Axel looked down.

"Oh, they must all have taken refuge!" So, he went below decks easily, as none of the doors were locked. Like I said, the pirate captain was dumb.

While there were no lamps lit, in the broad daylight, slashes of brightness came through cracks and small portholes. Therefore, Axel did not have to stumble around as much as he could have.

He came to the back end of the ship and noticed a pale young man struggling to drag himself and his pounds of chains up the ladder (Axel had come from the front). However, the young man was having a difficult time of it.

You see, the pirate captain was dead and needed no food. And he commonly forgot others needed to eat. It was up to the pirates to find or bring their own food. And, they did not share with Barleyo. He was against everything they did. The poor guy had trouble freeing himself from his deceased kin when on land, so he was badly malnourished. And weak. Hence the struggle.

Axel stood there and watched his actions. It was very intriguing. He had never seen anyone struggle on so.

"Keep it up, dude! You can do it!" That was all that occurred to him to do.

Startled, the white figure collapsed back down into a huddle. "Ow…"

"How you doing? I'm The Sir Prince Axel, and I was wondering if you'd seen the Princess Tranquility anywhere. Or, even, have you seen any thugs that looked capable of kidnapping?"

After getting over his initial surprise at this foreigner, Barleyo still stared at him. "I'm on a ship, and it is full of pirates." Axel's expression did not waver. Sighing exasperatedly, the pale young man struggled to his feet and added, "No."

"Drat. Okay, well, see you around!" And he turned to go back to the front of the ship despite the ladder right in front of him.

"Wait! Aren't you going to free me?"

Eyebrows protruding up to his mangy bangs, the knight turned back around. There had never been such a classically clueless expression documented in all of the anti-fairy tales. Barleyo himself was growing puzzled just looking at him.

"You don't seem like a damsel in distress to me."

"Does that mean you can't rescue me?"

"Yup." He made to leave again.

"Wait! Are you sure that's the only way you'll help me?"

"Yep. But, say, you do have a kind of damselly look about you. Longish hair, delicate features. Can you give a scream?"

There had to have been odder requests. So, Barleyo obliged.

"Wow. Definitely can be classified as a damsel. I guess I'll help you get out of here. But where are we? And what happened to the rest of my party?"

While he tried to explain to the befuddled Axel, the latter grabbed the chains and carried them for the young man.

"So we have to go back across the water. Okay. Got it."

He patiently led Barleyo up to the plank, notorious for being present here, which was protruding out of the side of the ship to aid the pirates in leaping across the expanse of water.

"All right, I see what just to do." The Sir Prince Axel stood at the end of the plank, seeing the backs of the pirates on the Virtually Unstoppable had gone even further away. They were now all surrounding the giant.

"I'll just let you go first."

He dropped the chains over the edge of the plank.

Now, if you remember, those chains were already too heavy for the weakened Barleyo. So, as they rattled off the edge, you can guess what that means for the guy himself. Yup, bye-bye! Down he went with a tremendous splash and another scream worthy of receiving an A+ in the damsels-in-training class. Axel leaped after him and set out to the other side of the ship.

Does it occur to him that perhaps those chains that had made the poor boy struggle to climb a ladder would be even direr (what an awkward word!) in water where his thick hair and clothes had collected at least five gallons of extra weight? Does he slow his steady swimming in order to check if the "damsel" he had rescued was making his way across as well?

This is Axel, people. He was butchering a tapestry of an innocent unicorn with the blunt edge of his sword.

Nope.

&&

Meanwhile, back on the ship being looted, the pirate captain had caught sight of the giant still standing in place, growing very bored. The said giant was debating changing places with Kun, but then he noticed the pirate and smelled something that reeked.

"Hmm, this guy seems familiar. But I don't know why…"

Maybe because they had both been alive long ago before he had been trapped in this hat and before the other had died? Maybe because they had been enemies long ago in Egypt and the point of the giant's life had been to halt this pirate captain and keep his people safe for all time? Maybe because this guy had been part of what had killed him eventually and locked him in a Puzzle? Maybe because they had even existed within hosts and battled again with a card game known to millions?

Naw, the giant remembered now; this pirate captain only looked like his great uncle Albert, whom he had seen as a corpse that his family had argued over for months about who had to pay for the burial, and so Albert had been left to rot in their backyard during the interlude. Quite interesting to watch the process of decay.

Yesah was annoyed that the pirates had come this far; it meant they had honestly earned the right to steal his cargo. He was taking them to the hold, but they got sidetracked by Sama-san-dono.

"Who's this?" the pirate asked. "New crewmember?"

"No, it's Sama-san-dono, a giant that came out of a little guy to be of use."

The captain began snickering. "Sama-san-dono! (1) Pathetic!"

"Oh, and what's your name?" asked the now-grumpy giant.

"Majesty-highness-excellency-lord-sir-mister-liege-God-superior-glorious-perfect-noble-wonderful-best-highest-royalness-greatest—"

Everyone was staring at him. "Stop!"

Now, do you really think I am going to type that out every time I want to refer to the pirate captain? And do you really think I am going to proceed in wasting energy typing "pirate captain?" He will now be referred to as Egomaniac. (And you thought Sama-san-dono was bad!)

He could not understand why everyone was laughing at him. But Egomaniac did not like it one bit. To get the attention away from himself (this might seem contradictory, but Egomaniac only wanted positive attention), he continued to bother the giant, unaware just how simple it would be to be disintegrated by one hand. After all, he was already half-decayed.

"All giants come equipped with rhymes," the gray-haired pirate rasped. "Come on, let's hear your rhyme!"

Moodily, the tall Sama-san-dono crossed his arms. After a brief silence, he finally relented, "Very well, it's true I know my own rhyme."

"Let's hear it. Maybe it will have enlightenment!"

"Haha!" Clothier snapped his fingers. "You didn't give a perfect rhyme!"

Smugly, de Vlin crossed his arms. "Rhyme that is near works just as well you'll hear."

Mainly to stop those two from continuing, the giant chanted, "Fe-fi-fo-fa, I smell the blood of all o' ya. Be you happy or be you sad, you've gone and made me really mad."

"Hmm, if you hadn't've rhymed, given it more of a natural flow like free-verse, I think I would've liked it."

De Vlin smiled. "I it did certainly love. The words flew free like a dove."

"Is that some kind of threat?" Egomaniac asked of the giant. He laughed as the latter part of his name suggested.

Now, Sama-san-dono was spending some time thinking of his answer. Finally, it came down to one question of his own. "Are you in any way planning on endangering the world?"

Surprised that he had been read so easily—someone must have been noticing him plotting!—Egomaniac halted his hoarse laughter. His one eye narrowed and as he crossed his arms, his rather boney chin jutted out in complete stubbornness.

Well, if Sama-san-dono were not stupid, and surprisingly, he was not so dumb as others (remember, we left Barleyo floundering and sinking as Axel climbs onboard the ship!), he recognized the reaction for what it was: 100 guilty.

"Aha! So you are planning to take over the world or something! Well, I won't let you! I'll save the world myself!"

Scoffing on the sidelines, ignored by all but Muggy, as was usual, Put'oh muttered, "If he were truly interested in saving the world, he'd eliminate excess waste, start programs for endangered species and habitats, eradicate poverty, distribute food more efficiently, and support the services of family planning. But I doubt he's going to be doing any of that soon."

All thoughts of the treasure forgotten, the zombie turned his full attention to this immovable giant and cast his thoughts back to where they commonly were—debating endless ways of destruction and power so that he could one day have the entire world submissive to his world. For the present, however, he would settle if Barleyo himself would listen to him.

How is our dear lad Barleyo doing? Let's check in with him.

&&

Glug glug.

&&

(1) Honorifics in Japanese that give various degrees of respect. It is little like using "Mister" or "Madam." The pun is on his name being just honorifics with no actual name at all. Sama-san-dono is arrogant.