Digital City Diaries

written by Shaun Garin

concept by Ryan Griffin

Digimon Adventure is distributed by Disney and Buena Vista Entertainment, and is originally owned by Toei and TV Tokyo.

This fic is rated PG-13 for sillyness, the half nekkid fighting and other such things people may find questionable. Take two tylenol for the headache this is about to ensure, a cup of sake, yes a cup, and two Rolo Donuts for the requisite chance of even UNDERSTANDING the fic.


Chapter 2 : A Surprising Amount of Wierd


Like all stereotypes, the idea that most deer hunters are dim-witted yokels who sit in the woods, get drunk, and shoot anything that move simply isn't true of all deer hunters. Like all stereotypes however, it has some basis in truth. And that's where we found Earl and Lloyd, two college frat boys turned office workers who decided that it'd be a great time to get out of the city, kick back a few cold ones, and handle extremely powerful weapons. Judging by their state of inebriation and the noise they were making, any wildlife species in the area was probably safer due to their being there.

Suddenly, the bushes rustled. The men fired their weapons in the general vicinity of the noise, although general direction in this case required a rather broad definition, in specifics, including a percent margin of close to 250 percent. The noise stopped.

"Say, Earl, think we hit anything?" the first drunken bum called to his companion.

The answer came to them as an earsplitting roar echoed through the forest, and with a magnificent flash of light, a giant panther like creature made seemingly entirely out of flames and sharp pointed teeth and claws leaped in front of them. It snarled viciously and eyed the two hunters as though to decide which one looked tastier.

The first hunter made a grab for the gun he had dropped upon hearing the roar. A single flame flared up from the panther's mane and turned the gun incredibly hot. The man tried grabbing the gun in spite of this, and came out with a nasty burn. His companion put two and two together (and came up with about six, but hey, he had a lot of beers that night) and decided not to pull a similar move.

With another vicious snarl, the creature then began to speak in a deep, rumbling voice, "I am a guardian spirit of these forests, sent from the fires of Hell to take vengeance on those who would defile my realm! How dare you come in and endanger my quarry!" the creature let out another low growl.

To his credit, Lloyd managed to ignore the knocking in his knees and the strong desire to crawl into a fetal position and suck his thumb, "Umm… I-I-I…"

"SILENCE!" the panther roared, "I care not for your feeble excuses! I demand that you remove yourselves from my presence, from these forests, and never darken my doorsteps with your guns! All life in this forest is under MY surveillance, and should you enter here again, YOUR LIVES ARE FORFEIT!" With that, he let loose another roar and the two men ran for their lives, abandoning their guns and leftover booze and fleeing from certain death at the hands, err… paws, of this fiery hellcat.

Once it was apparent that the two were well outside of hearing and visual range, and not coming back, the hellcat shimmered and shrunk down into a very small puppy-like creature. From behind him came a thirteen year old boy with shoulder length blonde hair, lime-green tinted glasses, a hemp vest, camouflage pants, and a black T-shirt with a Darwin fish emblazoned on the front. An electronic belt buckle of sorts shimmered with the cat/puppy. The two of them looked at each other, and began laughing hysterically.

"You were right, James, that WAS fun!" The puppy said through chortles.

"I mean, did you get a good glimpse at their faces? They were scared shitless!" He breathed in, made a face, then laughed again, "Literally!"

"Yeah, that was great! We should do this again!"

"Count on it, Plotmon. Maybe it'll keep a few idiots away from this forest and turn them to hobbies that don't involve slaughtering innocent wildlife."

Plotmon looked quizzically at the firearms and cans the boozehounds left behind, "What do we do with these?"

James took out a black garbage bag, "These get recycled," he picked up one rifle between as if it were a dead animal and placed it in the bag, "Guns and alcohol. Bad enough when separate, dangerous when combined."

Plotmon made a face at the beer cans, "I tried some with Penguinmon. It tastes nasty. I don't know what he likes about it."

James raised an eyebrow, "Penguinmon drinks? I don't know whether to shake my head or burst out laughing!" He smirked as the image of a drunken penguin Digimon came to mind.

Plotmon pushed the cans together and James scooped them in the bag on top of the rifles, "We should get back soon, your dad will be worried."

James slung the bag behind his back, "Yeah. You know, I still can't believe how normal having you around is. It's like we were never separated."

Plotmon nodded, "It is a bit weird for me. I mean, I barely understand half the things in your house."

James chuckled, "Well, at least you understood the toilet. Having a housetrained dog is one thing. A toilet trained dog is a whole 'nother matter…"

The two friends wandered out of the forest and back to their house, stopping only to pitch the bag in a recycling bin at the parking lot of a nearby restaurant. Luckily no one noticed.

Later, a report of two drunken hunters crashing into a fencepost made the news.

Apparently, the drunks claimed to have hallucinated being frightened by a giant fire cat. A Breathalyzer showed the men's BA content to be far above the legal limit. The report ended saying the two were in custody and may face up to 20 years in prison. James went to bed that night knowing he had, albeit in an entirely non-traditional, and by many standards an immoral and even insane way, made a difference.


"As your partner, I should accompany you to this school of yours," said Renamon as she folded her arms and glared down at her petite red haired partner.

Hikaru sighed as she grabbed a blouse from her closet and tossed it on, leaving it unbuttoned. As she shook her long hair out from the confining single braid, the girl turned to her as she propped a few pins into her mouth. "Because," Hikaru said through the mouthful of pins, "You can't just waltz into the school and expect not to get noticed. You don't exactly look human you know."

Renamon maintained her gaze as she sighed. "I suppose you're right. I could just hang out on the roof perhaps."

"I don't think that's such a good idea," Hikaru said recalling the amount of people who hung out there skipping classes. "Here's an idea. Why don't you go to Sean's house? He's setting up some things for the other Digimon to watch while we're at class."

"I do not know the way," said Renamon as she leaned on the wall. "Are we passing by then?"

Hikaru nodded as she pinned the last of her hair up in a very elaborate topknot in order to keep her mass of hair out of her face. Buttoning up her shirt and tossing on a skirt, Hikaru checked her reflection before opening the dresser drawer. "Here, put these on."

Renamon looked at the pants and shirt tossed to her. The shirt was emblazoned with an unusual logo with two arrows pointing up and down. "I do not know how to wear these," said Renamon as she looked at the shirt and pants.

"It's easy," said Hikaru as she proceeded to dress her Digimon, making compesations for her long bushy tail. "There, good as new."

Renamon looked at herself in the mirror. Dressed in an 3V1L-L33T T-shirt and a pair of baggy Kahki pants that was slung so low on her hips that her tail poked out the top of them, Renamon raised an eyebrow. "Like it?" asked Hikaru. "That's my good Megatokyo shirt so don't wreck it, k?"

"I... um..." Renamon stammered before she fluffed up her chest fur. "Hey, this is pretty cute."

"See!" said Hikaru as she grinned at her Digimon. "Lets get going before Sean ditches us."


"I still say Dom is funnier than Ed," said Sean as he packed up his lunch for the day.

Carter grinned as he shuffled through Sean's Anime DVDs as he showed Penguinmon how to operate the DVD player. "Naw, I think Ed is wicked. He has a SHOTGUN. How cooler than that be?"

"You're both wrong," said James with a smirk as a hyperactive Plotmon scampered around his feet. "Largo is funnier."

"I'd have to disagree," said Hikaru as she walked in the front door. "Piro is."

"Piro is an angst-cow!" exclaimed Sean from the kitchen as he slapped peanut butter on his cheese sandwich. "He can't go two strips without being depressed!"

"He's cute, that's what matters," replied Hikaru.

Plotmon wolf-whistled. "Hey sexy momma Renamon! Looking good babe!"

"Thanks," said Renamon as she sat down and bonked Plotmon on the head. "Don't call me babe."

Carter looked up at Hikaru and grinned. "You got her learned well kimosabe."

"Me speak good," snickered Hikaru and Carter smirked back.

"We should get moving," said James as he looked at his watch. "I dunno about the rest of you but I really need to get to that first period cause I have a test."

"Right, just about done," said Sean as he brushed a lock of hair away from his arm. "Damnit, I'm getting this hair cut! Keeps getting into my food!"

"You look so cute with long hair," said Hikaru as Carter took up the slack.

"Yeah, like a Gourry Clone. We just need to clad you in an armor and replace your head with a Jellyfish," quipped Carter.

"JELLYFISH THIS!" Sean bounded over the counter and tackled Carter.

As the pair fought on the ground, James sighed, went over and packed up Sean's lunch. Plotmon looked up at him and asked, "Are they always like this?"

"Naw... this is just a hello," replied James blithely as he tossed Sean's lunch at him. "Get moving before I drag you out on your sorry asses."

"Right, fine. Just a moment. Puppy Dog Attack!"

Carter shook his leg to try and dislodge Sean from it. "Getoffame!"


"I'm bored," whined Plotmon for the umpteenth time. "And I'm hungry, and I ache and I'm sleepy..."

"There's Anime, here's a fridge, a hot pad and a bed over there," said Penguinmon as he listed off cures for all of Plotmon's gripes.

"We're done most of Carter's meager collection, the fridge is nearly empty of food, the hot pad I can't get into the microwave and the bed is lumpy," counteracted Plotmon.

"We're going to be here for a LONG time if you two keep arguing," remarked Renamon as she cycled through the filler episodes of Carter's DVD set of Lost Universe. "We need Patamon here to keep you two apart."

"If you haven't noticed, he's free floating data at the moment," grumbled Plotmon. Penguinmon hit his friend on the head.

"Hey, that's a bit harsh," Penguinmon reprimanded.

"Yeah," agreed Renamon. "Besides, it's not like he can't HEAR us anymore."

There was a chill wind suddenly and Penguinmon shuddered. "Maybe he DID hear us."

Plotmon nodded, his fur on edge. "I think he's mad. Damn him and his free floating super chill thing of doom!"

Renamon felt the chill pass two more times as she got up. "Ooo-kay, lets get going."

"Where to?" asked Plotmon. "We can't go out like this."

Renamon looked over and then smirked. "Hey Penguinmon. How well can you imitate a dog?"

Plotmon and Penguinmon blinked. "Oro?"


"Woof, woof, woof, um, woof?" Penguinmon jerked away from the dog who was sniffing his behind. "Hey! Get your own tree!"

The dog growled but ran away. Penguinmon looked up at Renamon who had donned a baseball cap and sandals in an effort to look human. So far, it was working half the time. "So... tell me why again I have to be the dog and Plotmon gets to mimic a stuffed animal?"

"Because you lost at Rock, Paper, Sissors, that's why," said Plotmon from Renamon's arm crook.

"How can I loose at Rock, Paper, Sissors? I have no FINGERS!" exclaimed Penguinmon hotly.

"C'mon, it's not that bad, is it?" asked Renamon. "You're obviously cute enough to be a pet."

Penguinmon stammered and flushed for a moment before orienting himself before he walked into a lamppost. "So where are we going exactly?"

"That I don't know," replied Plotmon. "Ren?"

"Don't call me Ren," said Renamon absently as she stretched out her senses. As a partly mystical digimon, (partly being the key word as Renamon never really got a chance to practice her magical powers), Renamon could sense her partner from a further section of the area as long as she was within a certian distance.

With a sniff and blink, she pointed down eastward. "That way."


"Parkview Public High," read off Plotmon as Penguinmon went to relieve himself in the bushes. 'Being a dog,' he remarked before heading off, 'I get some certian privilages.'

"This should be it. I can feel our partners from inside the building," said Renamon.

"So how do we get inside?" asked Penguinmon as he waddled back into view.

"Why not the front door?" asked Renamon as she slipped the leash around Penguinmon's neck.

"Sure, pick on the poor Penguinmon why don'tcha?" asked Penguinmon.

"The Penmon's griping again," remarked Plotmon, getting a glare from Penguinmon.

"Firstly, I may be a Penmon but I like my individuality. Do you realize how tedious it is at a family reunion? 'Hi Penmon! What's up Penmon? Hey Penmon, how's your wife Penmon?"

"You came from a large family?" asked Renamon, surprised at the fact. Penguinmon didn't speak much about his family, only that he didn't get along with them.

Penguinmon nodded. "I was expected to marry this distant relative of mine and have little Digitamas of our own by now if I wasn't chosen to be Carter's partner."

"Her name?" asked Plotmon as they crossed into the front lawn, pausing to admire the statue of the founder of the school.

"Penmon," grumbled Penguinmon. "You see why I want a little individuality?"

"Sheesh. Glad there's a handful of us Renamon," muttered Renamon as she opened the doors.

The high school was a casual affair for a school in Edmonton. Cream colored walls, blue patterned carpets and trophy cases all around the area. A few vending machines patterned one area walled off with the words "Student Lounge" next to it. Students crossed the hall in an effort to get to the next class and to either side were elegant stairs. Renamon whistled. "This is a school? I expected it to be different."

"Like how?" asked Penguinmon curiously.

"Like some kind of dull lab or something of the sort," said Plotmon in reply. "This is nicer than I thought it would be."

"Well looky here, a geek squad from the costume class." The trio turned to see a group of teenagers dressed similarily in blue and white patterned jackets. "Did your mommys make those stupid looking costumes?"

"Excuse me?" asked Renamon, stumped by the remark. Did she really look THAT human?

"And what's this? You geeks know you can't bring pets into the school." The boy with slicked back hair clucked his tongue. "I'm sure Mr. Delphini would love to know that his students are breaking rules."

"Excuse me, Chad," said a voice from behind the group and the group lazily turned to see a girl with long dark hair smirking at them. "But these 'geeks' as you put it are visitors here. I'm sure Coach Bronson would LOVE to know that his elite football team members are trying to harass visitors."

"Feh." The small group of jocks stormed away as the girl smiled and nodded to Renamon and her small mismatched friends. "Sorry about that miss. Those guys love to torment anyone who's different."

"I see that. I could have handled it myself," said Renamon.

"I'm sure you could," said the girl. "Madison Clarke."

"Rena... Mon."

"Rena Mon? Interesting name. Do you tend to walk around in a furry costume all the time?"

Penguinmon and Plotmon stiffled chuckles as Renamon felt a bit flustered at the bold question. "Um, well, it's a costume thing?" she hazarded.

Madison giggled for a moment. "It's very convincing. Hey, I have a spare. Want me to show you around?"

"Sure," said Renamon, feeling relieved that the girl wouldn't probe further.


"It's a fairly good sized school," said Madison as she lead them around the winding halls. Plotmon and Penguinmon who were still pretending they were pets had lost count of where they had gone. "Did you just transfer in?"

"Kinda like that," said Renamon as she was led into a room that smelled strongly of turpentine. She sneezed.

"Oh, must be the dust." Madison swept her hand around the room. "This is the art room that we share with the High School district. As it stands, the school is split between the Juinor High and High Schoolers. That's why people are always around and about."

"Eeeeeeey, Madison!" greeted a stringy looking boy. He was dressed in a pair of ripped and torn jeans, a shirt that read "Death to Republicans" and had ear piercings. Madison waved and lead the group over. "So who's the new girl?" asked the boy.

"Just a visitor," said Madison. "Kevin Randall, this is Rena Mon. Rena, this is Kevin."

"Nice to meet you," he said, sticking out a hand covered in clay. Renamon shook gingerly as he wiped his hands. "Man, I can't wait until I have full access to the workshop across the hall."

"What's in there?" asked Renamon curiously.

"Only the best art room in the district," said Kevin, eyes shining. "Man, I can't WAIT to get in there and muck around with everything!"

"He's going for a Art-Oriented High School course," said Madison with a smile. "I'm a Classic Lit girl myself."

"I see," said Renamon when in fact everything went over her head.

A sharp buzzer rang and Plotmon yelped, clasping paws over his ears. Madison's stomach growled on cue. "Oh, there's the lunch bell. Wanna get something at the caf? My treat."

"Food?"


"I've never seen pets eat human food like that before," said Kevin as he picked at his Tuna Casserole.

Penguinmon was struggling with his knife and fork while Plotmon ate like a dog but more civilized. Renamon had fingers so she could eat easily. "They're well trained," she said, taking a potshot at the pair. Penguinmon glared at her and Plotmon made a soft yip in reply.

"So, Rena are you planning on transferring in?" asked Madison as she stabbed her fork into the salad.

"I dunno yet," said Renamon. In truth she and the other digimon were tempted. It was better than the alternative and staying at home. Or living in a storage closet while at school. "I'm boarding with Hikaru."

"You mean half-pint?" asked Kevin, mouth full of spinach. He swallowed and added, "Half-pint is her nickname all over the school. Fiesty but she's a nice girl. Look like a eight year old though."

Renamon chuckled. "Yeah, that's Hikaru. She's my partner."

The two blinked and somehow Renamon felt like she stepped into a landmine. "A partner?" asked Madison curiously.

"Yeah, my partner. We do stuff together."

The pair of humans shared a glance. Was Hikaru Ninomiya, the girl who was voted to become a total knockout when she was older and taller... that way?

Penguinmon chuckled under his breath. He was a guy and much less innocent than Renamon and Plots. In fact, he noticed the double meaning.

The rest of the meal was spent in lilting chatter as the penguin appeared be laughing all throughout the meal.


"Well, I gotta get to class," said Madison. "It was fun showing you around today Rena."

"I'm glad to have met you," said Renamon. "And you too Kevin."

"Aw, I'm just glad Hikaru found someone," said Kevin easily. "She's too cute of a girl to be without someone for a while."

Madison elbowed Kevin but Renamon smiled and nodded. "I'll have fun tonight. See you two later!"

As Renamon left, Kevin looked at Madison and said, "You really think Hikaru's a lesbian?"

"She's gotta be," said Madison with a nod. "There's no way she could fall for a girl who likes to walk around in a furry fox outfit in broad daylight without having some kind of tendencies."

"Yeah, I'll bet she's a hot busty blonde when out of that," said Kevin with a hint of wistfulness in his voice.

"Down boy, she's taken," chuckled Madison. "I guess it was too good to ask. A cutie like Hikaru a lesbian and she's taken. There goes my love life."

Kevin snorted. "I dunno why I put up with you."

"Maybe because I'm your sister?"

"Half sister," said Kevin with a smirk and she swatted at him.


"I'm home!" exclaimed Hikaru as she tossed her coat on the rack. Renamon looked up and waved.

With a 'oof', Hikaru plopped down onto the overstuffed arm chair. "What a day. First those dumb jocks tease me about my hair, and then I spilled soup on my lap during lunch and now Madison came up and wished me luck. What's that all about?"

"I honestly don't know, but I'm glad I'm your partner Hikaru," said Renamon with all sincerity.

Hikaru nodded, looking tired from the long day. "I heard there was a new girl at school. Some girl named Rena. She was supposed to be cute but I never got a chance to see her."

Renamon hid a smile. "Well perhaps that Rena is just one of those people who blends into the woodwork."

"Yeah. Hey Renamon? I'm glad you're my partner too."

"Same here."