Chapter Four - Hearts and minds
Author - Pilotslover )
Disclaimer - I don't own FF IX, Vivi'd be the main character if I did. I do own the concept, and the names of Vivi's sons, so please ask if you want to use this fic or anything within it.
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Response to reviewers -
RoS - I believe everyone does! Why Vivi? I don't know, he's just the easiest to see as depressed. Hehe.
LottiRebel - I'm afraid Eiko is saved until the end - chiefly to give him a chance to recover.
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By the time they had reached the Black Mage village, Amarant had done as much as he could to Vivi's slashed wrist; it was a mess and there was no real art to it but at least it stopped it from bleeding. Not only was there the outer damage to repair but the mercenary had used some soluble fibres to repair the cut blood vessels inside the wound too. "You really can do just about anything Amarant," Zidane said as he met him in the corridor outside the room Vivi was in. "How's he doing?"
"All things considered, I think he'd rather be dead."
"Yeah, I know that but he's too young to go making stupid decisions like that."
"Too young in body, he's more mature then you are when it comes to his heart and his head."
"If you were so convinced that he'd be better off dead then why the hell did you help us?!" Zidane snapped angrily; tail bristling out behind him as he did so.
"I didn't say he'd be better off dead," With this, the mercenary slouched off down the corridor. Zidane shook his head slightly, not even wanting to work out what went on in Amarant's head half the time. "He's awake by the way," The salamander called back casually, "But you might want to stay where you are right now, he'd take your head off if he had the strength."
"What do you mean by that?"
"You really are an idiot. He doesn't want to see you Zidane, not yet."
This bit into the Genome, who stopped what he was doing and looked the mercenary full in the back. Swept up in the idea of rescue and saving Vivi's life he had not once stopped to consider the fact that the mage may well have been beyond help. "You'll just drive him to do something stupid, he doesn't want to see anyone he was really close too." Amarant turned back to face him, "He certainly didn't want me there, it was just upsetting him."
The Genome sighed and slipped down to the ground; utterly defeated by an enemy that he had no defences against, the anger of someone he had considered a very dear friend. "You've really done it this time," He murmured to himself, his head in his hands. "He was at rock bottom, you didn't see it, and then you go and do this."
"You didn't see it because he didn't want you to; you think he wanted someone to see this? Why do you think he went away in the first place?" Amarant offered before stalking from Zidane's sight; the king did not move, rocking slightly on his haunches for a while.
The young White mage emerged from Vivi's room, a host of bloody things in her hands; the red substance stained her robe. Zidane looked up, slightly awed by the fact that the mage had that much blood to spare, 'Then again, he probably doesn't.' He thought sadly, lowering his head again. 'He didn't want people to know he was upset but we should have seen it anyway! Damn it, Vivi's a friend and I left him to cope with this all alone!'
"There's no point waiting out here sir," The white mage told him softly, she stood just by his feet. "He's asleep again now; his body can't cope with being awake."
"Is he going to survive this?"
The medic gritted her teeth slightly, uncertain about what to say. "He's lost a lot of blood sir, whatever Amarant did stopped the bleeding but there's no telling if he's lost more then he should have." She shook her head, "The traditional capacity of a 13 year old male is 12 pints, I think he's lost about 4 or 5; the recovery is going to take a about a month."
"What you mean before he's better?"
"No sir, by no means, it'll take a long time before he has the strength to do anything. Right now, magic is out of the question, I've silenced him to act as a deterrent."
"Smart move,"
She left him; her pace was quick as she made her way to the incinerator. Zidane's eyes went to the door, before a sense of guilt forced him to look away again. The ship echoed with the sounds of flight but the Genome heard none of it as he lowered his head onto his folded arms, blinking hard to drive away the tears; Vivi was his best friend, bar no one. He had told the mage things in the past that he would tell no other, not even Garnet. They had been a team, the two members of the group who could always guess the others next action, 'I didn't see this though.' Zidane thought as he heaved in a big breath. 'I always knew he was down, I could always tell that but I didn't tell this time did I?'
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Dr. Tot was quick to meet them on the airship when it docked at Alexandria, a white mage followed him; Cid had sent a message ahead of them that White magic was not working to heal Vivi's wounds. "Whatever did you do without magic?" The usually academic doctor asked Zidane as he stood to meet them outside the room, a place he had not left since he had boarded the ship.
"Amarant stitched it, I haven't seen it, but the white mage on board ship seems to think its okay."
Tot raised a hand thoughtfully to his chin, "You do realise why the magic refused to work don't you?" He queried of the king who shook his head. "White magic works on the principle of the one you're using the healing magic on wanting to be helped, part of casting such a spell is the targets desire to be healed." He looked Zidane in the face, his big glasses catching a lot of the light in the corridor as he did so. "If Vivi's current emotional state is as dire as the letter alludes then he certainly does not want to be healed."
Zidane's mind ran some of the letter through his mind, already having some of it dictated to his memory. "Yeah, I never thought he was suicidal, it doesn't sit with him as a person." He offered, not wanting to seem like he was a bad friend despite the fact that he had missed so much.
"In the past I would certainly say the same but the events of today demonstrate otherwise."
"Yeah, I know."
Tot shook his head, "I was there for most of the boys stopping, I know you saw Valian's but you saw only the end of things. Vivi spoke to no one in the castle of the things he saw and felt when each one stopped," Zidane's expression became slightly confused, he did not understand what Tot had meant by 'felt'. "I see you are confused and I guess what it is that confuses you; the first two deaths were more like I imagined stopping to be, they slipped away during the night. However, the deaths of the last four were more distressing."
The Genome nodded, "They really did just fall apart, didn't they?" He asked of the doctor who nodded gravely. "You told me about it when we were there for Valian, it started with the lesser major organs and spread into the more important ones; they broke."
"Yes they did, that's a very good way to say it." Tot agreed with a nod of his head, "When I said that Vivi felt it I meant quite literally, the boys were a part of him. I doubt he was exaggerating when he wrote that it felt like he had lost a part of his heart."
A shudder ran up Zidane's back as he tried to imagine how much losing the boys had physically hurt the mage, no matter how hard he tried he could not do so; each attempted to feel the pain Vivi felt ended in a sharp shudder of shock up his spine. "I have lingered here too long; I trust there are supplies in here." He bowed his head to Zidane before he entered the room.
