Chapter 23 Walking Onward towards the Climax Perhaps!
Iheezu had been plenty patient. But she wasn't used to be ignored for minutes at end. Finally, the fortune teller strode up to Barleyo and tapped him sternly on the shoulder.
"Do you want me to look into my crystal ball to see your future?"
The almost-albino turned in surprise, but his look of surprise changed to a glare. "I care nothing for the future, woman." About to turn aside and look anxiously to the door again, Egomaniac whipped around once more. "Wait! Tell me if I will have riches and the world!"
Smiling, Iheezu pulled out her crystal ball and began to chant over it.
"I see…"
Egomaniac peered over more closely, anxious to catch sight of gold in the foggy depths.
"I see a split personality arguing all the time over what to do…chains binding…piles of riches—"
"Mine!"
Getting annoyed, Iheezu lost her affected voice and glowered. "Just let me finish." Then, half-closing her eyes once more and slipping into her old way of speaking, she said, "I see a great death for you…actually, more than one. How strange…no less than fifty-nine times you will die."
That was old news, and fed-up with the useless woman, Egomaniac was about to rip the ball from her hands and search for the gold himself. Because he was so caught up in his future, however, Princess Tranquility slipped out behind him without him being able to throttle her first.
Let me out! Barleyo had finally come to realize that his consciousness was stuffed away in some old, water-logged chains half his life now, and he knew just who was behind it. You're my kin, supposed to protect me because of your curse!
Oh, shut it. I am protecting you! By controlling your body, I have the best ways of keeping you safe from harm!
That isn't right, Barleyo protested weakly.
Egomaniac gave a cackle that only sounded in his mind. Yes, it is! Now stop pestering me! I have a fortune to make!
Any more protests were squeezed out of Egomaniac's mind as he triumphantly regained complete control. All this chatting was making him rather hungry…and bored, so he turned to see his nightmares a reality.
There was Tranquility, marching away with the Gruffs and her godmother following.
"Blasted!" The thief charged after the others, chains rattling along behind.
Iheezu looked up, frowning. "There's a fee you have to pay, you know! Get back here!" Gathering up her crystal ball, she clutched her unpractical skirts in one hand and followed the crowd.
"How in all Ferula and everywhere else did he manage to snag such a beauty?" Clothier muttered to de Vlin. Mind you, he didn't really care. He loved Princess Serenity after all. Right?
"He is a prince, and we are not, since…" the earl cast a look around. "Why be we not princes, minstrel good? Do we not dress the part for their neighborhood?"
"No, that isn't it. Look how that fool, Axel, looks. He was just lucky for once. Darn him! Let's go. No need to stick around here. We'd be better off chasing Tranquility."
The two looked at each other, burst out laughing, and linked arms as they tread down the stairs.
"I must continue to assist my dear princess!" Lemonade, wishing she could stay to flirt with both hairy/hairless wonders, fled down the stairs much like a certain character when the clock struck midnight, I presume. But she didn't lose her shoes because they were way too tight on her feet so they would look small. And of course, those two wonders pursued her.
"Now it's just us," the witch said with a smile. "I have so much to show you and tell you, dear Axel. Come to my tub and we'll leave this dreaded tower."
The Sir Prince Axel gulped. A tub? And really, the witch was taking things a bit too fast for his liking. I mean, he was the knight. He was supposed to do the pursuing, not the other way around!
"There is something first that I must do, fair maiden!"
He leaped over to the windowsill, and dramatically waved at Yor, who was quickly becoming whiter than any rouge could make her. Then, the moron jumped.
It was a jump like rock climbers perform (there have always been rocks and people on them, so there have always been rock climbers), holding onto a rope as they do mini jumps down the cliff, feet using the wall as a pushing point. And Axel's rope? The creeping hair, of course!
Unfortunately for Axel's short-term memory problem, he had forgotten it didn't go all the way to the bottom of the tower. Abruptly, just as he was giving a gallant smile to the frantic witch in the window, his hands slid down the end of the hair as he went down, ready to grasp the next section…but there was no next section. Within seconds, he had fallen to the ground.
"Aaaaaaaaaaxxxxxxxxxxxeeeeeeeeeellllllllllllll!" Yor Love screamed. Of course, being but a minor witch, her magic was very useless in saving him. They mainly only worked for herself. And she couldn't concentrate clearly anyway.
Having the best timing in the world, de Vlin and Clothier had just arrived at the bottom of the tower panting from their race (a tie, of course), and Axel plummeted right on top of them.
Oof.
A princess in a rage could only huff along for so much time, especially with a certain somebody following her. Or rather, two certain someones.
Don't even think Put'oh; she could hardly have cared if he died (poor fellow! I love you! Put'oh, Seto, Kaiba, Kiaba? What's the difference? After all, they have equal intelligence, equal rugged good looks, equal cynicism and wit, equal maturity, equal frozen blue eyes…oops, getting carried away. Maybe I need a boyfriend. I know, Kenshin! Sigh. He's an anime character, he's an anime character! Not real…drat it.)
And her godmother/godfather? -scoff- Yeah, right.
No, it was obviously the presence of Kiaba who she was respecting a little too much and cute little Muggy. Remember the face he cast her way awhile back? Well, she had missed it, but the boy's charm was already working on her.
The real aspect that made her slow her pace just slightly was this conversation:
"If you don't do something with that arm, you know what's going to happen. It will never realign itself properly, you'll be stuck taking drugs that will forever change the gene pool, and everyone will suffer from your obdurateness." (1)
Aw, Put'oh's worried about his twin! (Don't ever ask which one is older.)
With a scoff, Kiaba never even glanced at him. As machine-like as he was, it was doubtful he felt anything in his arm at all. Perhaps it wasn't even a broken bone at all but some gear loose…
"I do know, and I could care less if it is realigned properly, I never take drugs, and I won't reproduce, so there's no cause to worry about me corrupting the gene pool." His small smirk played at the end of his lips as he saw his brother, his wonderful-eloquent-public-speaker-to-improve-the-world brother suffer from not knowing what to say.
Well, heh, heh, Mr. Kiaba, two can play at that game…
"But, brother, it isn't good to leave it broken, is it? I mean…" Muggy expertly let his voice drift off as his mournful eyes looked directly into his older brother's hard orbs. Hanging his head in shame, the boy whispered, "I don't like knowing that you're hurt. I want to help you, but I can't. For all the times you've helped me, I just want to return the favor. But you won't let me by helping yourself."
"Puppy-dog looks of Doom" I have seen them referred to, but, puppy-dogs weren't around yet. Just hounds. So, Mugguba opened his eyes wide, wide enough that they began to tear almost over the edge. (Oh, yes, another picture reference. Tell me if you haven't seen this guy! I will direct you to the nearest help station! At the end of the first Virtual World Arc, when Mokuba is thanking Yugi and the gang…he looks up with such a sad expression on his face—yet he is saying thanks. I'm confused—and is too cute to be allowed.)
With a little muttered phrase, Kiaba passed a hand over his other arm. A small grinding sound echoed into the air and left them all grimacing. But Kiaba, as you could guess, did not grimace.
Or rather, not until he heard a certain someone catching up behind him…
But we're not there yet.
With the world spinning like a flying saucer (sighting of those have always been around), Earl and Tanner just let their heads thunk to the ground. Axel was surprised but not moving.
"That's odd. What an astounding leap of bravery I just did to save you two goons from knocking into each other!"
Twin groans of annoyance and utter frustration escaped the two poets' lips in a form very unpoetic-like. Being who he was, Axel never noticed. But he did jump off in a rush in order to go reach out a hand to help Yor Love who was going to jump out the window after him.
Or so he had thought.
Amazingly, while the author could have done a parallel to a certain jump from a pole into Joey, I mean Axel's arms, it (yes, I'm a thing not a person) opted to make Yor Love slightly more intelligent than her love.
She was going carefully down the center of the stairs, levitating in a rush to find the broken bits of The Sir Prince scattered on the ground.
What a surprising and embarrassing reunion to anyone not of the hugging couple. That merely meant that de Vlin and Tanner raced away from the two, leaving behind the rest as they shouted for the group ahead to slow down.
Finally, the only people left in the tower, finally nearing the bottom, were Lemonade, Kun, and finally Sama-san-dono. Both the latter were waiting for the other to leave. But it didn't happen.
"Kun, don't you—" Sama-san-dono started.
"I think you ought—" Kun began at the same time.
Both glared at one another.
Lemonade, rushing to catch up to her princess, did not make good time because of her shoes. Other than that, with the corset ruined, she could actually get enough air to breathe. Still, Axel and Yor easily kept ahead of her, and they were strolling.
With her priorities on the princess, she did not know what the other two were doing. Or rather, Lemonade pretended she didn't know. But in reality, every ounce of her being was attuned to them and their argument.
Hey, whoa, it wasn't an argument yet! Kun was instead muttering furiously to himself as he put his hat through odd contortions. But, as you could guess, nothing useful happened. At least, not useful to Kun. Having a very flexible hat might have come in handy had he been traveling through a certain country where hats were used for tricks all the time. To sneak by guards, one had to merely mesmerize them with hat tricks first. Or, as they really approved; their way of money was through hat tricks and the more complicated, the more it was worth. Kun, however, did not care for all the hat tricks he was doing or all the random things he was pulling out of his hat because Sama-san-dono still was walking nearby.
Rabbits, doves, bananas, silken scarves…Kun was leaving an entire trail that would make it easy for people to follow them.
I must be paranoid…why on earth would anyone be following them?
Sama-san-dono, seeing his other self preoccupied, gave a smirk and walked up to Lemonade.
"You seem to be having trouble walking, fair Lemonade. Might I aid you?"
Oh, geez, he had taken a lesson from the courtly voices of Earl and Clothier. Oh, and Axel. While the lady-in-waiting loved to hear such flattery coming out in ever nuance of tone, when Sama-san-dono put a hand on her arm, she whipped around and slapped him across the face. Hard.
"Don't touch me! I'm a lady-in-waiting for the Princess Tranquility, and no one is worth losing my job over! How else would I manage to keep up with the newest fashions?"
Well, Sama-san-dono was very confused (no doubt you are, too), but the king and queen hired only the best to be ladies-in-waiting for their daughters. Any hint, any whiff of the loss of innocence (even just being escorted by a member of the opposite sex!) and she would lose her position. Flirting, however, was allowed and expected.
And then, completely changing her tone, Lemonade added, "Don't you think I look absolutely stunning in the newest fashions?"
Well, Sama-san-dono was not about to take a chance to be slapped again. It hurt, and he was ashamed to admit he was frightened of it, but he was. The girl had a great arm on her. He worried it came from a lot of practice. So he merely gave a nervous smile and slowed his pace just enough that Kun was slightly closer.
Maybe the djinni was willing to let Kun have the girl. Because really, oblivious to all as Kun continued to do random acts to his hat, the short guy never noticed the slap at all. When he pulled out a white steed from his felt hat, he paused for a moment, shrugged, and kept digging and twisting and pulling and yanking…
"Kun!" Sama-san-dono roared. "Catch that beast!"
Of course, his shout startled the horse and it dashed off ahead of them, tossing its head and snorting.
Racing after the stallion, the djinni wished for once, that he was a genie. He might have been able to float along then instead of using his two legs. Life wasn't fair.
(1) : Thanks for the suggestion, Tawnykit!
