A/N: OMG! Thank you guys so much for all the reviews! MADE IT TO FIFTY! I love you guys. So this is the 6th chapter. I'll dedicate the next one to whoever can pick the movie reference in this chapter (hint: it's something from one of my favourite movies). Anyway if anyone has any ideas or suggestions or even a line you want one of the characters to say just drop me review or email because I'd love to hear it! If people want characters to say things I promise to work it in, unless it's really not compatible with the chapter. Now onto the chapter!
Marissa woke up at five thirty, like every other morning. She loved being awake and knowing everyone else was asleep. Knowing that Julie wasn't looking for her, that she could walk around with her hair unbrushed and unwashed. In year seven Summer and Marissa had figured out that really early in the morning was the best part of the whole day. Everyone they knew got up at six thirty to get ready for school, so they got up at five (thirty). It was, as Summer said, "the time only time we have before the bodysuits go on."
She walked down her absurdly long driveway to the mailbox. She was thinking about him. She thought about him 93 of the time. The rest of the time she was coaching herself. "Don't be jealous. Don't hate Lindsay. Don't let him know. Don't be mean to her. Keep up the persona." But other than that she thought about him. As she walked she thought about being caught, if she was falling. What if she was falling in love? She didn't want to stop falling; she just wanted the person she was in love with to be falling with her. So they could explore the endless abyss together.
She finally reached the mailbox and pulled out the mail. Her eyes widened with surprise when she saw her diary on top, but then remembered that she'd left it at the Cohen's.
Ryan must've dropped it off last night
She walked thinking about bubbles. She loved bubbles. She loved that they were perfect and their surface was always moving and swirling. But the main thing she loved was, even though they were perfect, they popped.
When she got back to her room she tossed the mail on the kitchen bench, and walked up to her room. She decided to have a bath and catch up with her diary. She opened it to the page she was on and found the note tucked in to the pages tightly. Her eyes flicked from Dear Princess straight down to Ryan.
"Who does Ryan call princess?" she asked herself aloud. Marissa read then rest of the note and turned the colour of pasty parchment.
"So he does love her." She whispered and soon the lily scented bubbles were mingling with tears, and the sound of a heart shattering filled the galaxies.
"Summer? It's me. Can you come over now? Please?"
"Coop? What's wrong? What happened? No, don't tell me over the phone. I'll be there in five minutes with chocolate chip cookie dough and the pink tissues. Don't move."
Five minutes later Summer was hugging a very white and wide eyed Marissa, who was sitting very still and staring at nothing.
"What happened?" Summer asked rubbing Marissa's back.
"Ryan dropped off my diary and he left a note for me to give to Lindsay," she said handing Summer the note. Summer read it and gave Marissa a confused look.
"How do you know it's for her? It doesn't have her name on it on it, or say to give it to her anywhere,"
"Who else would it be for?"
"Um, YOU Coop!"
"Yes, because Ryan and I have been dating for the last year, nine months, eight days, three hours and about 16 minutes," she said sarcastically.
"Just because I'm still not over him doesn't mean he's not over me."
"He's not over you! Are you deaf and blind or just criminally stupid? He's still in love with you,"
"No, he's not," Marissa said quietly after Summer's outburst, indicating to the note.
"Look, Coop, Ryan was insanely drunk last night, and I think that he still has feeling for you. Being drunk mean he couldn't repress his feelings, so he told you how he felt,"
"Even if that is true, we're obviously just not meant to be. Remember when we were dating?"
"Yeah, it's the happiest I've ever seen you guys,"
"We were the worst couple ever AND the universe was, like, trying to break us up,"
"There's NO WAY you guy's weren't meant to be. You fit like, oh I don't know! It's like you're a Vera Wang dress and he's the perfectly matching shoes! Anyway your names fit. Your name always fits with who you're meant to be with. Like, with Sandy and Kirsten: Kandy, me and Seth: Summereth. See Ryan and Lindsay, they just don't fit, Rindsay? Lian? They suck. You and Ryan are RyRissa, its perfect."
"No. I'm going to give her the note. Then 'Jack shall have Jill, Naught shall be ill'." She said with quiet conviction.
"Can't you see that every time I see him my heart breaks a little more? But I can't be weak and tell him how I feel, it would hurt him so much, and I won't hurt him,"
"If showing what you feel is being weak, are you really sure you want to be strong?"
"I have to be."
Marissa walked calmly to Lindsay's door. She was perfect, wearing jeans and a singlet, and still managing to look glamorous. She used her perfection as a wall, a scary, shiny wall. Behind it she was trembling. She knocked on the door. The door flung open eagerly. (A/N I don't mean the door was eager, I mean the person opening it was eager)
"Hi! Oh Marissa,"
"Hey. Were you expecting someone else?"
"Yeah, Ryan's supposed to coming round," she said confidently. The wall didn't react to his name.
"Well, I'm just here to drop this off," she said passing the note to Lindsay.
"Bye."
Summer knocked on the pool house door. Ryan answered.
"We need to talk,"
"You've been chatty lately,"
"You just don't get it do you? Well, you probably do. You understand how lucky you are to have the Cohen's as your family and how lucky you are to have their love. You understand how lucky you are to have Seth as your brother and best friend and Sandy and Kirsten as your parents. You know how lucky you are to be loved by them. But, you don't know how lucky you are to be loved. She loves you. With all her heart. And it's tearing her apart. You know she won't fight for you because she's scared of hurting you? She's so in love with you that she keeps her feelings hidden and delivers love notes to your girlfriend for you."
"What love notes? Marissa isn't in love with me Summer, and I know I'm lucky to have her love. But I never got her to give Lindsay love notes"
"What about the note you left in her diary then?" Ryan's face drained of colour.
"That note wasn't for Lindsay." He whispered
"It was for your princess wasn't it? It was for Marissa."
The one who has our heart
