Sunrise over the tango factory's A/N: This chapter has been so hard to write...sometimes I felt like beating myself to death with the keyboard...but...finally...here we are! Thanks for all the feedback! Love you all!
Sunrise
Rimmer sat and stared into the dark abyss of his cup of coffee.
It was stone cold given he'd been staring at it for the best part of 2 hours.
He sighed and looked up and around the midsection to ease the dull ache in his neck.
Lister had spent over a week recovering in the medi-bay, and Rimmer had not yet brought himself to venture in yet.
The thing was, he was afraid of what he'd say when he got in there…no doubt something insensitive and totally inappropriate.
Or worse, what if said what he actually thought…he went cold at the very thought and took to once again gazing at his coffee.
He jumped as someone placed a hand on his shoulder; he spun round to see Kryten.
"Sir" said the mechanoid, "we need to talk…"
Rimmer frowned, "what about?" he asked dubiously
"Lister" replied Kryten simply, Rimmer coughed and looked away, a sign that he didn't want this conversation to carry on.
"I think I know the reason why he felt the need to try and kill himself"
Rimmer quickly turned to face him, "what?" he asked.
Kryten paused and looked to the floor "you" he said finally.
A long silence followed.
"Me?" laughed Rimmer, "but…but I've not been here!"
"And perhaps that's the reason why" said Kryten quietly, "your absence"
Rimmer couldn't believe what he was hearing.
How could he have driven Lister to suicide…he'd left Starbug months ago.
"The thing is sir…he missed you." said Kryten when Rimmer didn't respond
Rimmer tightened his grip around his coffee cup "missed me?" he repeated in a hushed voice
Kryten nodded. He'd been contemplating telling Rimmer about Lister's behaviour, and that very morning had finally decided to go ahead with it.
"No" Rimmer said, shaking his head "no, no…it…that wouldn't happen…you must be mistaken…me and Lister aren't even friends"
"Mr Lister thinks of you as much more than a friend," said Kryten as Rimmer moved to walk away.
He stopped, and looked towards the mechanoid with a questioning look upon his face.
"I think he tried to kill himself because he thought you would never return…and the pain of a broken heart doesn't heal easily"
Rimmer walked across the midsection, running his hands through his hair agitatedly, "It can't be true-" he muttered
"Since you left, Mr Lister has become reclusive, he's not his usual self and for the past few weeks he's been locking himself in his quarters…I know it's not polite for me to say, but his pain was driving him to the brink of madness…"
It was too much for Rimmer to take in, "I refuse to accept that Lister cares for me, what about everything we've ever been through? The countless arguments, disagreements, crossed words, slanging matches…are you seriously saying that after all that he'd like me…. he wouldn't miss me!"
" I did though…despite what you might think." came a voice,
Lister was stood at the doorway, leaning on its frame for support.
"Sir" clucked Kryten, rushing to his side "you should be in bed, you need your rest!"
Lister ignored him; he was staring straight at Rimmer, who shifted uncomfortably at his gaze.
"I missed you," he said simply.
Even Rimmer couldn't still disagree with something that had come straight from the horse's mouth. He gave a nod, not really knowing what to do or say.
Lister walked slowly over to where Rimmer was stood and gave a faint smile.
"Why did you try to kill yourself?" Rimmer blurted out, he winced inwardly at the look of complete shock that flashed across Lister's features.
"Forget it" he dismissed "I'm fine."
"Fine!" repeated Rimmer dumbfounded "Lister, you tried to take your own life…that is not being 'fine'!"
"I'm alright." shouted Lister
"Well it doesn't look like that from where I'm standing!" retorted Rimmer. "From where I'm standing it looks like you've lost the plot!"
"So I'm mad now am I?"
"You tried to kill yourself…hardly normal behaviour for a perfectly sane person" said Rimmer. "and what makes it worse is you tried to kill yourself because of me…"
Lister jerked as if he'd been slapped before forcing a laugh "you give yourself w-a-y too much credit!"
Rimmer narrowed his eyes "but it's true isn't it."
Lister shook his head defiantly, "no"
"He says otherwise," said Rimmer, pointing to Kryten to grimaced,
Lister looked outraged, he clenched his fists. It was the only thing he could do to stop him lashing out. "Well…it's times like this you really know who your friends are…" he gave Rimmer a offended look before walking calmly from the midsection, leaving Kryten and Rimmer alone with only the uncomfortable silence for company.