What had she gotten herself into? She was torn between two very different men whom she actually did happen to love. With Carter she shared a past, there was that element of familiarity with him. With Jake she had a new beginning, a sense of self and stability when that had been so non existent in most of her life.
She nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard the lounge door open and the foot steps of someone behind her. She quickly shoved herself back into the charts, shaking her thoughts aside for the moment.
"Don't worry, they have been gone for a while now." Susan said as she got herself a cup of coffee.
Abby faked confusion. Susan couldn't know about she and Carter could she? "Excuse me?" she asked quietly.
"Carter and Jake, you thought one of them was coming in. Carter left hours ago and Jake headed out during the small trauma you worked on earlier. He said he would see you at home." Susan said as she sat down at the couch and looked at Abby.
Abby's heart raced, Susan knew for sure, she was certain. "Oh, okay." she replied looking down at the chart though she could feel her friend's eyes on her.
Susan could tell Abby's mind was working fast trying to piece things together. "I know...we all know. We are just keeping our mouth's shut for Jake's sake." Susan said looking at Abby, she couldn't hide her disappointment. She had watched Abby struggle alone through a lot of things and survive Carter breaking up with her. She had blossomed since then and actually realized she had potential and that's when Jake came along. He offered her a chance at a happy life. Slowly Susan had watched her friend come closer and closer to letting that slip right through her finger tips.
"But he doesn't know, I mean on his own he hasn't figured it out?" Abby asked, her voice a little shaky, she was seeing for the first time how over her head in this mess she was.
"No Abby, he doesn't know. Trust me if he did he'd be crushed and you would know." Susan said, then she paused, thinking over things for a few moments. "Why are you doing this? It doesn't make any sense to me."
"To be honest...I don't know anymore Susan, I just don't know what I am doing anymore." Abby whispered.
"I'll tell you what you're doing. You are killing a chance at a happy life with a man who would do anything for you, and you're stringing Carter a long in the process. You have to give up one, you can't keep having them both anymore. You are playing with fire and someone is going to get burned if you keep on with this charade." Susan lectured.
"You think I don't know that? But I love them, both of them." Abby said in her own defense.
"Then act like it Abby for your own sake. You have to do the right thing." Susan said softly to her, her tone a little more gentle now.
"I don't think I know that the right thing is anymore to tell you the truth." Abby admitted.
"Well a good place to start is honesty. You have to tell him the truth."
"You mean tell Jake?" Abby asked wide eyed.
"Yes, tell Jake." Susan replied.
"I don't know if I can do it. He'll hate me." she said.
"If he does then you only have your self to blame for it. You are supposed to be marrying Jake in two months Abby. Don't you dare walk down that aisle and pledge your love to him if you can't give him you entire heart. If you can't do that then let him go now before it's too late." Susan said.
Abby listened very carefully to her friend's words, she was right, this had to be done. "What will he do? What will he say when I tell him?"
Susan shook her head. "I can't tell you that. He will be hurt and upset,
even angry. But he will be that much more if you keep this up much longer. Just do this okay, it will all work out some way or another." Susan said as she got up and walked out of the lounge leaving Abby to think. She hoped her friend would do the right thing but right now she wasn't so sure.