Chapter 2
In Mercy's Name
Leaving Lady Saturn's chambers was just about the easiest thing Serenity had ever
done. Deciding upon a course of action once outside, however, proved to be another matter
entirely. Where, the High Queen wondered, do I go from here? Closing the door to Lady Saturn's
bedchamber, Serenity stared at it for a moment, shuddering as she remembered what was on the
other side. Lady Saturn lay dead behind that door.
Serenity shivered harder. Lady Saturn should not be dead. She was a goddess, an
immortal! Or at least, she had been before she seduced the King of Pluto to her bed, breaking
the vow of chastity that held her to the mortal world. A vow she made to the mother of my bloodline,
Serenity reminded herself, hot anger lancing through her heart. Lady Saturn had been punished
with mortality for her crimes, and rightly so, the Queen believed. She made that promise that she
might never leave this world of men. She thought bitterly. Fitting that she should leave it painfully and
as a mortal.
For an instant, Serenity felt a strange thrill from her wrath. Rarely had she felt anger so
strong as what she felt towards the dead Queen of Saturn, and she found it to be quite an
exhilarating emotion. But beneath it was an unbearable sorrow that left her feeling deflated and
weary. I should forgive her. She thought. After all, I once loved her as well as her subjects did. Of
course, the Lady Saturn she loved was the virgin goddess, not the mortal woman lying pale and
cold in her bed, the sheets wet with the blood of her womb. Serenity sighed. She loved Lady
Saturn no longer. How could she harbor any love for a woman who so casually cast aside her
sacred promise for a night of pleasure in the arms of a married man? Gods above, Lord Hades
even had a daughter, a beautiful young woman, whom the Queen knew filled her father's heart
with unspeakable joy. And surely it will not be long before he has another child by his wife, now that the
temptress is dead. I doubt if Lady Saturn even loved him at all.
Again, Serenity sighed. This entire scandal had taken a heavy toll upon her. Although
Serenity had at first thought it best to banish Pluto and Saturn from the Kingdom of the White
Moon, Lord Hades' father, Chronos, had been positively fanatical about keeping the whole thing
a secret. He had offered many reasons for doing so—Lady Saturn had seduced his son; Lady
Moira was still loyal, and should not be punished for her husband's actions; if too many people
became involved, it could spark a war—but Serenity was fairly certain his true motive for
insisting so was his desire to protect Princess Setsuna. The god of time loved his granddaughter
so dearly, and surely did not want her to be hurt by her father's betrayal. Still, all else he had
said had been true as well. Serenity had no doubt it had been Lady Saturn who had invited
Hades to her bed. Perhaps she had used some sort of spell as there was no other way Serenity
could imagine Hades sharing himself with any woman save his wife. Such a spell was certainly
within the goddess' power. Hades surely still loved Lady Moira truly, and the gods knew that
the burden Setsuna bore upon her shoulders was heavy enough without having this added to it.
Queen Serenity trusted Chronos deeply, for he had always been loyal to her. Selene as
her witness, if Chronos were given a sword, and ordered to slay her where she stood, Serenity
would bind both hands behind her back, expose her breast, and smile as she closed her eyes, for
she knew no blade placed in the Time God's hands would draw a single drop of blood from her.
Because she trusted him so, she had followed his advice in dealing with Lady Saturn's disloyalty.
She had banished all memories of his lover from Lord Hades' head. Saturn had been expelled
from the alliance that was the Kingdom of the White Moon. Its people were placed into a
thousand-year slumber so that they would not try to make war against the kingdom, and would
wake with no memories that they were ever anything but a simple people who bow to no one
but the gods above them. Only the lesser Queens were informed of Lady Saturn's shame.
Certainly, they must have told their families, but Serenity was careful not to give any name to
the goddess' lover. With the exception of herself and Chronos, no one, not even Hades himself,
would know who had sired Lady Saturn's child.
Lady Saturn's child, the High Queen thought. The child I now bear in my arms. Serenity
fretfully chewed her lower lip. Chronos had warned her not to let Lady Saturn's baby survive.
"She will inherit planetary magic from both her mother and her father, and it will be
corrupted because she was conceived in sin. Should it awaken, it would take complete control of
the child," the god had told her, shaking his head. "The result would be a darkness that could
possibly destroy your kingdom if its host is allowed to live." Serenity shuddered. Had Chronos'
words truly been but a suspicion, an account of what might happen? Or was it something that
had been revealed to him at the Gates of Time, an end to be etched in stone unless she
complied? Oh, how she wished Chronos were not bound to the Rules of Time that forbid him to
reveal certain truths about the future. If Chronos truly had seen such an end, was there really
anything Serenity could do to change it? Then, the Queen felt her belly twist painfully as a
memory stirred within her. Once again, she saw Nephrenia, Queen of the Dead Moon, cursing
her baby daughter, claiming that the reigning princess would not live to follow her mother to
the throne. Could this child I hold in my arms be the one who will take my daughter's life? Could
Nephrenia have had a hand in her making?
Adjusting her hold on the swaddled infant in her arms, Serenity folded back a corner of
the blanket that she might look upon the girl's face. Her name was Hotaru. Or at least, Serenity
assumed it was. As she was dying, delirious with a childbirth fever, Lady Saturn had stretched
her arms out towards the babe in the High Queen's arms, moaning, "Hotaru! My Hotaru!"
Serenity had to believe that Lady Saturn had been crying out for her child when she said that,
which would mean that "Hotaru" was the name she had chosen for her.
Hotaru was a wretched little thing. From the folds of the blanket, she peered up at
Serenity with wide, frightened purple eyes set deep in her gaunt, pallid little face. In spite of the
thick blanket wrapped around her and the heat from Serenity's body, Hotaru shivered in the
silver-haired woman's arms. The Queen was afraid to hold her closer, though, for she was so
frail it seemed she would break if hugged too tightly. Somehow, though, sickly and feeble as she
was, Hotaru of Saturn was strangely beautiful. So delicate, so frightened, so innocent…
Oh, Chronos, Serenity thought, I could place my life in your hands and never fear for it. But I
believe you are wrong about this child.
I know that Nephrenia cannot be behind Hotaru's birth, Serenity reminded herself, for after
she tried to curse my child, I used the Silver Crystal to seal her within a mirror, where she can do no
harm. Serenity smiled with relief. Hotaru was certainly no bearer of doom, only a poor bastard
child conceived in a bed of betrayal and orphaned at birth, a forsaken soul with nowhere to go
and no one to turn to. She cannot very well go seeking for refuge, the Queen thought, so I must bring
it to her. The poor girl only needs the chance to live. I swear I will not let her planetary magic be
awakened, but I will not let her die, either. I will save her.
Hotaru began to squirm in Serenity's arms, flailing her tiny fists wildly, and emitting
hungry little whimpers. She had not yet taken a meal from her mother's breasts; Lady Saturn
had been far too weak to suckle her. Serenity felt her heart sink like a stone. How in Selene's
name did she expect to feed this child? She could not nurse her, for her bosom had been dry
many years now. She might have gone to one of her servant women—always, there was at least
one with an infant at her teat—but that she knew she could never reveal Hotaru's existence to
anyone. Merciful Heavens, how did she expect to save this child when she could not so much as
keep her belly full?
Hotaru's cries intensified. Serenity doubted not that the babe's empty stomach was
causing her unbearable pain. I must not despair. I will find a way to feed Hotaru, and she will grow
healthy and strong under my care. Almost without thinking, the Queen shifted the baby girl in her
arms, holding her against her shoulder and rubbing her bony little back with a tender hand.
Hotaru's doll-sized fingers clutched a fistful of the rough, ragged cloth that made up the Queen's
disguise, and continued to cry. Whatever I chose to do, the woman thought, it must be done quickly.
Hotaru can only survive so long without nourishment.
To the child, she said, "Hush now, little one. Soon, you shall have your fill." Somehow,
she added silently. Then, suddenly, like a blessing from the gods, Serenity was struck with an
inspiration. Without another moment's hesitation, the Queen summoned her power, and
vanished from Saturn forever.
***
The Silver Palace was so placed upon the moon that as the moon rotated, it spent even
periods of fourteen hours each in sunlight and shadow so that those who lived there could
measure days relatively close to the way they did on Terra. Currently, the Silver Palace, as well
as the Crystal Tower, was cloaked in shadow on the moon's dark side. It was to the Crystal
Tower, which contained Selene's most sacred shrine, that the Queen transported Hotaru and
herself.
Almost a full day before, Queen Serenity had stepped inside the Crystal Tower and
ascended the staircase that led to her celestial mother's shrine to pray and disguise herself
before going off on her secret quest to Saturn. In the corner of the little room containing
Selene's shrine, Serenity had left her billowing silver-white gown, her crown, and the hair pins
that she used to secure her long silver hair in its customary bun-topped pony's tails. Carefully
laying the infant on the floor before Selene's shrine, Serenity headed to that corner of the room
to shed her disguise and become the High Queen once more. Hotaru was not pleased to be laid
away from the warmth and comfort of Serenity's arms, with only her swaddling cloths between
her and the cold, hard floor. She let Serenity know this the only way she could—with her voice.
Her hands moving automatically to twist her silvery mane into its traditional style, Serenity
sang softly to the Princess of Saturn, remembering that songs had always calmed her own
daughter when she was fretful as a babe. Hotaru did quiet some, but she still hungered, and her
hunger still pained her. That was the first problem Serenity intended to solve.
As soon as was dressed, the High Queen gave Hotaru what she hoped was a comforting
kiss on her brow, and hurried down the stairs.
The guards at the door to the Crystal Tower had seen their Queen enter the tower
nearly a day earlier, but did not question her leaving so much later; she had told them that she
had urgent business to attend to on one of the outer planets, and would be teleporting there
after a quick prayer before her divine elder's shrine. Both guards bowed to the Queen, but
offered no words, for which Serenity was grateful. Barely acknowledging them, she raced into
the fields, where the sheep that were kept for milk, meat, and wool, were sound asleep.
As she approached the flock, Serenity pulled the Silver Crystal, the token Selene had left
to her bloodline after her Passing into the Realm of Gods, from the alternate dimension where it
was stored. Unlike the descendants of other planetary goddesses, the powers possessed by the
women of Selene's line were not bound to one specific element. With the Silver Crystal, Serenity
could do almost anything she desired.
Standing about a foot away from the slumbering flock, Serenity palmed the heavy
crystal, curled her slender fingers around it, and let her blue-violet eyes flutter closed,
furrowing her brow in concentration. Only a moment later, the Silver Crystal flared to life,
warming Serenity's hand with its power. A great golden light burst from the crescent birthmark
upon the Queen's brow, piercing the darkness.
In the middle of the flock, a young, dark-faced ewe, Fauna by name, lifted her head off
the wooly back of her sleeping lamb with a questioning bleat. A human voice was calling to her,
a gentle, inviting voice, beckoning her to its owner. Fauna was confused by this, because the
voice did not seem to be coming from anywhere in the field. Rather, it seemed to be speaking
inside her! Nonetheless, it was a good voice, non-hostile and even a little friendly, so she was
eager to find its owner.
Nudging her lamb awake, Fauna ordered him to follow her, and went off in search of the
human who was calling her. The gawky little lamb stumbled after his mother, bleating in
annoyance, but she would not let him lie down again. No responsible ewe left her lamb
unattended, especially one young enough to be at her teat still, as hers was.
Fauna found the human at the edge of the flock. It was an ewe, all silver and white, a
great beauty by human standards. Fauna recognized her at once. Although she had only seen
her from a distance, she knew that this ewe commanded great respect among the human flock,
for all of them always folded their bodies in half or bent their back legs and made themselves
shorter whenever she was near. From hearing them speak to her, Fauna had learned that this
ewe's name was something that sounded like "Yor-madge-es-tee."
This time, it was Yormadgestee who made herself shorter, folding her back legs beneath
her. The human ewe stretched out one of her front hooves towards the bawling lamb in an
inviting gesture. Fauna sensed that she meant them no harm, and did not scold her son when he
stopped crying and trotted up to her to lie across her folded back legs. Yormadgestee turned her
eyes to Fauna, and began to speak in her gentle human tongue. Somehow, Fauna found herself
understanding her words.
Yormadgestee had rescued an orphaned human lamb, and was keeping her in the tall,
shimmering house she called the Kris-tul-tah-wer. The lamb was too young to graze, and
Yormadgestee had no milk at her teats to feet the poor thing, neither were there any other
human ewes with milk available for the lamb's empty belly. Yormadgestee said that she knew
Fauna had her own lamb to suckle, but she could not bear the thought of the orphan lamb
dying, so could Fauna find it in her heart to share her milk lest the poor darling should starve to
death?
Fauna could tell that Yormadgestee was greatly saddened by the human lamb's plight,
and she was too. Fauna answered that of course she would share. As a matter of fact, she had
grazed since last feeding her son, and would the human lamb like to feed right now?
Yormadgestee bared her teeth in an expression of happiness, and said that would be perfect.
Serenity replaced the Silver Crystal in its dimensional pocket, and gathered Fauna's
sleeping lamb into her arms.
"Come with me," she told the ewe, knowing that her spell would translate her words
into something Fauna could understand, even if she was not holding the Silver Crystal in her
hand. She had secured the influence of her magic, so that until Hotaru could eat solid foods,
Fauna would see it as her duty to suckle the babe as she would her own lamb.
Although Serenity set a hurried pace as she headed back towards the Crystal Tower,
Fauna had no trouble keeping up. Serenity was glad for that. She did not want anything to delay
her returning to Hotaru. Unfortunately, something did.
"Your Majesty!" one of the guards exclaimed in surprise as she approached the Crystal
Tower. "Should you not be back at the palace? 'Tis awfully late."
"I yet have matters to discuss with my divine elder, good sir. If I may be allowed to
pass…?"
"Surely you must be weary after a day without rest," he protested, and Serenity knew
her exhaustion must have been evident on her face. "Why do you not wait until morning?"
"I have my reasons," she replied evasively.
"Forgive my asking, my Queen," the other guard said, eyeing Fauna with more than a
hint of distaste, "but what purpose do the sheep serve?" At any other time, Serenity might have
found his question amusing, but not now. Now, she was far too anxious to return to Hotaru.
"That is not your concern!" she told him impatiently. "Let me pass." The guard
shrugged and opened the door.
"As you wish, Your Majesty," he said, bowing as she passed with Fauna at her heels.
As Serenity took the stairs up to Selene's shrine, she began to hear the faint sound of
Hotaru's hungry wails floating down the stairwell. Silently, she thanked the gods that she was
not too late, and quickened her pace.
Hotaru was as frightened as she was hungry. She did not know where the woman with
the warm arms and gentle voice had gone, and she was scared that she had been abandoned, and
would stay forever on this cold, hard floor with no one to hold her and ease the pain in her belly.
Loud, almost hysterical cries burst from her sickly body, and when Serenity returned, she was
horrified to find the girl's face red and wet with tears. Immediately, the Queen hurried over to
Hotaru, and collected her into her arms, cooing and singing. The child's small body was
feverishly hot, ravaged by the effort of crying so hard for so long. I should not have left her alone,
Serenity realized, rocking Hotaru tenderly to calm her. The poor little thing might have cried herself
sick! But at least now she will be fed. As if she read her thoughts, Fauna trotted up to the Queen,
and bleated to ask if this was the lamb she was to feed. Serenity answered that it was. Fauna
bleated a second question: why does she cry so?
"She is afraid. I had to leave her alone to come find you, and she must have thought I
was gone forever. But now I am back and she must eat." Fauna agreed. The human lamb had to
eat.
Singing as loudly as she could without losing the tenderness in her voice, Serenity held
Hotaru securely beneath Fauna, guiding the child's head to the ewe's teat. A moment later, the
girl was suckling furiously, ravenously taking the sheep's sweet milk into her belly, and
growing more content by the minute. Fauna dozed as Hotaru drank up every drop of her milk,
as calmly as if the human infant were truly one of her own lambs. Serenity was thankful that she
had managed to find such a patient ewe to nourish the babe. It certainly made the work much
easier to have an ewe that would not fuss when Hotaru suckled so fiercely.
At last, Hotaru had eaten her fill. Not for the first time that day, Serenity thanked the
gods that she had insisted on mothering the reigning princess herself with no nurse save her
feline advisor, Luna, and had not given up the task to one of her servant woman. Knowing an
infant's tendencies, the Queen dropped a cloth onto her shoulder before resting Hotaru against
it. Serenity bounced the infant gently as she rubbed and patted her back coaxingly, still
humming quietly. Gently butting the woman's knee, Fauna asked if she had done all right.
"Just wonderfully." Serenity whispered. "Although, next time, I would suggest you lie
on your side. That will make it easier for Hotaru, and for me." Fauna answered that she would,
and Serenity promised to return her to the field just as soon as Hotaru was asleep. Just then,
Hotaru let out a contented burp. Casting aside the soiled cloth on her shoulder, the Queen
shifted the drowsy babe to one arm, and began to fix a bed for her from the ragged disguise she
had left in a heap upon the floor. Moments later, Hotaru was sound asleep upon it.
"This will have to do for the time being, Firefly," she said, using the nickname she had
given the girl just before Lady Saturn had begun to cry for her. "I shall find some way to
improve it soon. But you needn't worry about that. All that you need to worry about is
surviving. I promise, Firefly, I shall find some way to make life good for you. For now, though,
all we can do is face each day as it comes." Serenity swallowed hard. She knew there was much
she had not planned for when she decided to save Lady Saturn's child. She was not used to
feeling so uncertain. The sensation frightened her.
Tears in her eyes, Serenity turned to face Selene's shrine, and fell to her knees before it.
"My divine elder, celestial mother of my bloodline, guide me through this path of thorns! Please
do not forsake me! In mercy's name, help me protect this child!" she cried. But even as she spoke,
she wondered, would Selene truly forsake me for saving a traitor's child? If she has already turned her
back on me, is there anyway I could make her face me once more? All she could do was hope. Hope, and
face each day as it came upon her. With that thought, the weary Queen turned from Selene's
shrine, scooped up Fauna's lamb, and started down the steps that would lead her out of the
Crystal Tower. Face each day as it comes upon you, she told herself, and never give up hope. That
child will need as much as you can spare.
In Mercy's Name
Leaving Lady Saturn's chambers was just about the easiest thing Serenity had ever
done. Deciding upon a course of action once outside, however, proved to be another matter
entirely. Where, the High Queen wondered, do I go from here? Closing the door to Lady Saturn's
bedchamber, Serenity stared at it for a moment, shuddering as she remembered what was on the
other side. Lady Saturn lay dead behind that door.
Serenity shivered harder. Lady Saturn should not be dead. She was a goddess, an
immortal! Or at least, she had been before she seduced the King of Pluto to her bed, breaking
the vow of chastity that held her to the mortal world. A vow she made to the mother of my bloodline,
Serenity reminded herself, hot anger lancing through her heart. Lady Saturn had been punished
with mortality for her crimes, and rightly so, the Queen believed. She made that promise that she
might never leave this world of men. She thought bitterly. Fitting that she should leave it painfully and
as a mortal.
For an instant, Serenity felt a strange thrill from her wrath. Rarely had she felt anger so
strong as what she felt towards the dead Queen of Saturn, and she found it to be quite an
exhilarating emotion. But beneath it was an unbearable sorrow that left her feeling deflated and
weary. I should forgive her. She thought. After all, I once loved her as well as her subjects did. Of
course, the Lady Saturn she loved was the virgin goddess, not the mortal woman lying pale and
cold in her bed, the sheets wet with the blood of her womb. Serenity sighed. She loved Lady
Saturn no longer. How could she harbor any love for a woman who so casually cast aside her
sacred promise for a night of pleasure in the arms of a married man? Gods above, Lord Hades
even had a daughter, a beautiful young woman, whom the Queen knew filled her father's heart
with unspeakable joy. And surely it will not be long before he has another child by his wife, now that the
temptress is dead. I doubt if Lady Saturn even loved him at all.
Again, Serenity sighed. This entire scandal had taken a heavy toll upon her. Although
Serenity had at first thought it best to banish Pluto and Saturn from the Kingdom of the White
Moon, Lord Hades' father, Chronos, had been positively fanatical about keeping the whole thing
a secret. He had offered many reasons for doing so—Lady Saturn had seduced his son; Lady
Moira was still loyal, and should not be punished for her husband's actions; if too many people
became involved, it could spark a war—but Serenity was fairly certain his true motive for
insisting so was his desire to protect Princess Setsuna. The god of time loved his granddaughter
so dearly, and surely did not want her to be hurt by her father's betrayal. Still, all else he had
said had been true as well. Serenity had no doubt it had been Lady Saturn who had invited
Hades to her bed. Perhaps she had used some sort of spell as there was no other way Serenity
could imagine Hades sharing himself with any woman save his wife. Such a spell was certainly
within the goddess' power. Hades surely still loved Lady Moira truly, and the gods knew that
the burden Setsuna bore upon her shoulders was heavy enough without having this added to it.
Queen Serenity trusted Chronos deeply, for he had always been loyal to her. Selene as
her witness, if Chronos were given a sword, and ordered to slay her where she stood, Serenity
would bind both hands behind her back, expose her breast, and smile as she closed her eyes, for
she knew no blade placed in the Time God's hands would draw a single drop of blood from her.
Because she trusted him so, she had followed his advice in dealing with Lady Saturn's disloyalty.
She had banished all memories of his lover from Lord Hades' head. Saturn had been expelled
from the alliance that was the Kingdom of the White Moon. Its people were placed into a
thousand-year slumber so that they would not try to make war against the kingdom, and would
wake with no memories that they were ever anything but a simple people who bow to no one
but the gods above them. Only the lesser Queens were informed of Lady Saturn's shame.
Certainly, they must have told their families, but Serenity was careful not to give any name to
the goddess' lover. With the exception of herself and Chronos, no one, not even Hades himself,
would know who had sired Lady Saturn's child.
Lady Saturn's child, the High Queen thought. The child I now bear in my arms. Serenity
fretfully chewed her lower lip. Chronos had warned her not to let Lady Saturn's baby survive.
"She will inherit planetary magic from both her mother and her father, and it will be
corrupted because she was conceived in sin. Should it awaken, it would take complete control of
the child," the god had told her, shaking his head. "The result would be a darkness that could
possibly destroy your kingdom if its host is allowed to live." Serenity shuddered. Had Chronos'
words truly been but a suspicion, an account of what might happen? Or was it something that
had been revealed to him at the Gates of Time, an end to be etched in stone unless she
complied? Oh, how she wished Chronos were not bound to the Rules of Time that forbid him to
reveal certain truths about the future. If Chronos truly had seen such an end, was there really
anything Serenity could do to change it? Then, the Queen felt her belly twist painfully as a
memory stirred within her. Once again, she saw Nephrenia, Queen of the Dead Moon, cursing
her baby daughter, claiming that the reigning princess would not live to follow her mother to
the throne. Could this child I hold in my arms be the one who will take my daughter's life? Could
Nephrenia have had a hand in her making?
Adjusting her hold on the swaddled infant in her arms, Serenity folded back a corner of
the blanket that she might look upon the girl's face. Her name was Hotaru. Or at least, Serenity
assumed it was. As she was dying, delirious with a childbirth fever, Lady Saturn had stretched
her arms out towards the babe in the High Queen's arms, moaning, "Hotaru! My Hotaru!"
Serenity had to believe that Lady Saturn had been crying out for her child when she said that,
which would mean that "Hotaru" was the name she had chosen for her.
Hotaru was a wretched little thing. From the folds of the blanket, she peered up at
Serenity with wide, frightened purple eyes set deep in her gaunt, pallid little face. In spite of the
thick blanket wrapped around her and the heat from Serenity's body, Hotaru shivered in the
silver-haired woman's arms. The Queen was afraid to hold her closer, though, for she was so
frail it seemed she would break if hugged too tightly. Somehow, though, sickly and feeble as she
was, Hotaru of Saturn was strangely beautiful. So delicate, so frightened, so innocent…
Oh, Chronos, Serenity thought, I could place my life in your hands and never fear for it. But I
believe you are wrong about this child.
I know that Nephrenia cannot be behind Hotaru's birth, Serenity reminded herself, for after
she tried to curse my child, I used the Silver Crystal to seal her within a mirror, where she can do no
harm. Serenity smiled with relief. Hotaru was certainly no bearer of doom, only a poor bastard
child conceived in a bed of betrayal and orphaned at birth, a forsaken soul with nowhere to go
and no one to turn to. She cannot very well go seeking for refuge, the Queen thought, so I must bring
it to her. The poor girl only needs the chance to live. I swear I will not let her planetary magic be
awakened, but I will not let her die, either. I will save her.
Hotaru began to squirm in Serenity's arms, flailing her tiny fists wildly, and emitting
hungry little whimpers. She had not yet taken a meal from her mother's breasts; Lady Saturn
had been far too weak to suckle her. Serenity felt her heart sink like a stone. How in Selene's
name did she expect to feed this child? She could not nurse her, for her bosom had been dry
many years now. She might have gone to one of her servant women—always, there was at least
one with an infant at her teat—but that she knew she could never reveal Hotaru's existence to
anyone. Merciful Heavens, how did she expect to save this child when she could not so much as
keep her belly full?
Hotaru's cries intensified. Serenity doubted not that the babe's empty stomach was
causing her unbearable pain. I must not despair. I will find a way to feed Hotaru, and she will grow
healthy and strong under my care. Almost without thinking, the Queen shifted the baby girl in her
arms, holding her against her shoulder and rubbing her bony little back with a tender hand.
Hotaru's doll-sized fingers clutched a fistful of the rough, ragged cloth that made up the Queen's
disguise, and continued to cry. Whatever I chose to do, the woman thought, it must be done quickly.
Hotaru can only survive so long without nourishment.
To the child, she said, "Hush now, little one. Soon, you shall have your fill." Somehow,
she added silently. Then, suddenly, like a blessing from the gods, Serenity was struck with an
inspiration. Without another moment's hesitation, the Queen summoned her power, and
vanished from Saturn forever.
***
The Silver Palace was so placed upon the moon that as the moon rotated, it spent even
periods of fourteen hours each in sunlight and shadow so that those who lived there could
measure days relatively close to the way they did on Terra. Currently, the Silver Palace, as well
as the Crystal Tower, was cloaked in shadow on the moon's dark side. It was to the Crystal
Tower, which contained Selene's most sacred shrine, that the Queen transported Hotaru and
herself.
Almost a full day before, Queen Serenity had stepped inside the Crystal Tower and
ascended the staircase that led to her celestial mother's shrine to pray and disguise herself
before going off on her secret quest to Saturn. In the corner of the little room containing
Selene's shrine, Serenity had left her billowing silver-white gown, her crown, and the hair pins
that she used to secure her long silver hair in its customary bun-topped pony's tails. Carefully
laying the infant on the floor before Selene's shrine, Serenity headed to that corner of the room
to shed her disguise and become the High Queen once more. Hotaru was not pleased to be laid
away from the warmth and comfort of Serenity's arms, with only her swaddling cloths between
her and the cold, hard floor. She let Serenity know this the only way she could—with her voice.
Her hands moving automatically to twist her silvery mane into its traditional style, Serenity
sang softly to the Princess of Saturn, remembering that songs had always calmed her own
daughter when she was fretful as a babe. Hotaru did quiet some, but she still hungered, and her
hunger still pained her. That was the first problem Serenity intended to solve.
As soon as was dressed, the High Queen gave Hotaru what she hoped was a comforting
kiss on her brow, and hurried down the stairs.
The guards at the door to the Crystal Tower had seen their Queen enter the tower
nearly a day earlier, but did not question her leaving so much later; she had told them that she
had urgent business to attend to on one of the outer planets, and would be teleporting there
after a quick prayer before her divine elder's shrine. Both guards bowed to the Queen, but
offered no words, for which Serenity was grateful. Barely acknowledging them, she raced into
the fields, where the sheep that were kept for milk, meat, and wool, were sound asleep.
As she approached the flock, Serenity pulled the Silver Crystal, the token Selene had left
to her bloodline after her Passing into the Realm of Gods, from the alternate dimension where it
was stored. Unlike the descendants of other planetary goddesses, the powers possessed by the
women of Selene's line were not bound to one specific element. With the Silver Crystal, Serenity
could do almost anything she desired.
Standing about a foot away from the slumbering flock, Serenity palmed the heavy
crystal, curled her slender fingers around it, and let her blue-violet eyes flutter closed,
furrowing her brow in concentration. Only a moment later, the Silver Crystal flared to life,
warming Serenity's hand with its power. A great golden light burst from the crescent birthmark
upon the Queen's brow, piercing the darkness.
In the middle of the flock, a young, dark-faced ewe, Fauna by name, lifted her head off
the wooly back of her sleeping lamb with a questioning bleat. A human voice was calling to her,
a gentle, inviting voice, beckoning her to its owner. Fauna was confused by this, because the
voice did not seem to be coming from anywhere in the field. Rather, it seemed to be speaking
inside her! Nonetheless, it was a good voice, non-hostile and even a little friendly, so she was
eager to find its owner.
Nudging her lamb awake, Fauna ordered him to follow her, and went off in search of the
human who was calling her. The gawky little lamb stumbled after his mother, bleating in
annoyance, but she would not let him lie down again. No responsible ewe left her lamb
unattended, especially one young enough to be at her teat still, as hers was.
Fauna found the human at the edge of the flock. It was an ewe, all silver and white, a
great beauty by human standards. Fauna recognized her at once. Although she had only seen
her from a distance, she knew that this ewe commanded great respect among the human flock,
for all of them always folded their bodies in half or bent their back legs and made themselves
shorter whenever she was near. From hearing them speak to her, Fauna had learned that this
ewe's name was something that sounded like "Yor-madge-es-tee."
This time, it was Yormadgestee who made herself shorter, folding her back legs beneath
her. The human ewe stretched out one of her front hooves towards the bawling lamb in an
inviting gesture. Fauna sensed that she meant them no harm, and did not scold her son when he
stopped crying and trotted up to her to lie across her folded back legs. Yormadgestee turned her
eyes to Fauna, and began to speak in her gentle human tongue. Somehow, Fauna found herself
understanding her words.
Yormadgestee had rescued an orphaned human lamb, and was keeping her in the tall,
shimmering house she called the Kris-tul-tah-wer. The lamb was too young to graze, and
Yormadgestee had no milk at her teats to feet the poor thing, neither were there any other
human ewes with milk available for the lamb's empty belly. Yormadgestee said that she knew
Fauna had her own lamb to suckle, but she could not bear the thought of the orphan lamb
dying, so could Fauna find it in her heart to share her milk lest the poor darling should starve to
death?
Fauna could tell that Yormadgestee was greatly saddened by the human lamb's plight,
and she was too. Fauna answered that of course she would share. As a matter of fact, she had
grazed since last feeding her son, and would the human lamb like to feed right now?
Yormadgestee bared her teeth in an expression of happiness, and said that would be perfect.
Serenity replaced the Silver Crystal in its dimensional pocket, and gathered Fauna's
sleeping lamb into her arms.
"Come with me," she told the ewe, knowing that her spell would translate her words
into something Fauna could understand, even if she was not holding the Silver Crystal in her
hand. She had secured the influence of her magic, so that until Hotaru could eat solid foods,
Fauna would see it as her duty to suckle the babe as she would her own lamb.
Although Serenity set a hurried pace as she headed back towards the Crystal Tower,
Fauna had no trouble keeping up. Serenity was glad for that. She did not want anything to delay
her returning to Hotaru. Unfortunately, something did.
"Your Majesty!" one of the guards exclaimed in surprise as she approached the Crystal
Tower. "Should you not be back at the palace? 'Tis awfully late."
"I yet have matters to discuss with my divine elder, good sir. If I may be allowed to
pass…?"
"Surely you must be weary after a day without rest," he protested, and Serenity knew
her exhaustion must have been evident on her face. "Why do you not wait until morning?"
"I have my reasons," she replied evasively.
"Forgive my asking, my Queen," the other guard said, eyeing Fauna with more than a
hint of distaste, "but what purpose do the sheep serve?" At any other time, Serenity might have
found his question amusing, but not now. Now, she was far too anxious to return to Hotaru.
"That is not your concern!" she told him impatiently. "Let me pass." The guard
shrugged and opened the door.
"As you wish, Your Majesty," he said, bowing as she passed with Fauna at her heels.
As Serenity took the stairs up to Selene's shrine, she began to hear the faint sound of
Hotaru's hungry wails floating down the stairwell. Silently, she thanked the gods that she was
not too late, and quickened her pace.
Hotaru was as frightened as she was hungry. She did not know where the woman with
the warm arms and gentle voice had gone, and she was scared that she had been abandoned, and
would stay forever on this cold, hard floor with no one to hold her and ease the pain in her belly.
Loud, almost hysterical cries burst from her sickly body, and when Serenity returned, she was
horrified to find the girl's face red and wet with tears. Immediately, the Queen hurried over to
Hotaru, and collected her into her arms, cooing and singing. The child's small body was
feverishly hot, ravaged by the effort of crying so hard for so long. I should not have left her alone,
Serenity realized, rocking Hotaru tenderly to calm her. The poor little thing might have cried herself
sick! But at least now she will be fed. As if she read her thoughts, Fauna trotted up to the Queen,
and bleated to ask if this was the lamb she was to feed. Serenity answered that it was. Fauna
bleated a second question: why does she cry so?
"She is afraid. I had to leave her alone to come find you, and she must have thought I
was gone forever. But now I am back and she must eat." Fauna agreed. The human lamb had to
eat.
Singing as loudly as she could without losing the tenderness in her voice, Serenity held
Hotaru securely beneath Fauna, guiding the child's head to the ewe's teat. A moment later, the
girl was suckling furiously, ravenously taking the sheep's sweet milk into her belly, and
growing more content by the minute. Fauna dozed as Hotaru drank up every drop of her milk,
as calmly as if the human infant were truly one of her own lambs. Serenity was thankful that she
had managed to find such a patient ewe to nourish the babe. It certainly made the work much
easier to have an ewe that would not fuss when Hotaru suckled so fiercely.
At last, Hotaru had eaten her fill. Not for the first time that day, Serenity thanked the
gods that she had insisted on mothering the reigning princess herself with no nurse save her
feline advisor, Luna, and had not given up the task to one of her servant woman. Knowing an
infant's tendencies, the Queen dropped a cloth onto her shoulder before resting Hotaru against
it. Serenity bounced the infant gently as she rubbed and patted her back coaxingly, still
humming quietly. Gently butting the woman's knee, Fauna asked if she had done all right.
"Just wonderfully." Serenity whispered. "Although, next time, I would suggest you lie
on your side. That will make it easier for Hotaru, and for me." Fauna answered that she would,
and Serenity promised to return her to the field just as soon as Hotaru was asleep. Just then,
Hotaru let out a contented burp. Casting aside the soiled cloth on her shoulder, the Queen
shifted the drowsy babe to one arm, and began to fix a bed for her from the ragged disguise she
had left in a heap upon the floor. Moments later, Hotaru was sound asleep upon it.
"This will have to do for the time being, Firefly," she said, using the nickname she had
given the girl just before Lady Saturn had begun to cry for her. "I shall find some way to
improve it soon. But you needn't worry about that. All that you need to worry about is
surviving. I promise, Firefly, I shall find some way to make life good for you. For now, though,
all we can do is face each day as it comes." Serenity swallowed hard. She knew there was much
she had not planned for when she decided to save Lady Saturn's child. She was not used to
feeling so uncertain. The sensation frightened her.
Tears in her eyes, Serenity turned to face Selene's shrine, and fell to her knees before it.
"My divine elder, celestial mother of my bloodline, guide me through this path of thorns! Please
do not forsake me! In mercy's name, help me protect this child!" she cried. But even as she spoke,
she wondered, would Selene truly forsake me for saving a traitor's child? If she has already turned her
back on me, is there anyway I could make her face me once more? All she could do was hope. Hope, and
face each day as it came upon her. With that thought, the weary Queen turned from Selene's
shrine, scooped up Fauna's lamb, and started down the steps that would lead her out of the
Crystal Tower. Face each day as it comes upon you, she told herself, and never give up hope. That
child will need as much as you can spare.