Thanks to melanie39 for beta-ing

Disclaimer- I own nothing to do with the OC!

Come Undone

Chapter 2

The ride home had been uneventful. Seth kept looking in the rear view mirror at every opportunity to check on Ryan. He was in safe hands.

"Hey Summer, admit it, Chino's growing on ya." Luke had turned around and was watching Summer as she stroked the hair off of Ryan's forehead.

"He was a real friend to me when the whole thing came out about my dad. I mean, he totally had my back and he didn't need too, I was such a bitch to him when he first came here. Hell, I damn near killed him in that fire but he still was there for me. That's gotta mean something right"

"Woo how many beers have you had buddy" Seth laughed"You'll be telling the whole car that you love them next."

Luke looked pissed off.

"I'm just saying Cohen, that if Ryan has your back, then he has your back totally. He's defended you enough times Seth. I'm just saying that it's time we looked out for him. That's all."

"Don't listen to Cohen, Luke" Summer gave a glare to the back of Seth's head"I get what you are trying to say. We'll get him through this."

Seth looked at Luke sheepishly.

" Sorry, I get sarcastic when I'm nervous."

"Cohen, you must be THE most nervous person I know then" Summer laughed to lighten the mood.

They drove the rest of the way in silence and pulled up in the driveway and turned the engine off.

Seth turned around and looked at the slumbering form of his friend.

"So, any ideas on how we are going to do this? My plan is to manhandle him around the back of the house and into the pool house and pray that we aren't seen. Does that sound good"

They opened the back door of the car and with Summer pushing and Seth and Luke heaving they managed to get Ryan into a semi-upright position, then with one arm under his armpits, Seth and Luke managed to get him upright.

Unfortunately this was the moment that Ryan decided to wake up. He pulled away from the group.

"What the fuck are you doing" He shouted. He then stumbled backward before anyone could react. The back of his knees connected with a large planter filled with geraniums sending it and himself flying.

The light came on in the porch and the front door opened to reveal Sandy and Kirsten.

"What the hell is going on out here" Sandy barked as he took in the scene of Ryan sitting on the floor ineffectually brushing dirt and flowers off his lap.

"Is he drunk" Kirsten rushed over to Ryan, helping him up. " I can't believe you let him get in this state Seth."

"No Mom, I can ensure you he did that all by himself." Seth sighed.

Sandy came over and grabbed Ryan, who was leaning heavily on Kirsten. He was just in the process of leading him around the side of the house when Ryan doubled over violently and threw up, Sandy's shoes being the main casualty.

Summer gave a loud "ew". Luke and Seth stifled a laugh.

Sandy turned round and glared at them. "I'm glad you found that funny guys cause you are cleaning that up."

Sandy shifted in his chair; he had managed to get Ryan into the pool house with out any more incidents.

He was now sleeping soundly on his side with a bucket in handy reach. Sandy chose to stay with him just in case he rolled onto his back and threw up in his sleep.

Sandy was concerned with this turn of events. Ryan didn't drink normally and hey, he knew the kid was no angel, he knew that when they went out Ryan had a few beers, but that was usually it. He had seen Ryan looking at Kirsten sometimes when she was hitting the red wine a little too hard and knew what was going through his head. Ryan's body language changed. He became tense, his jaw would grind. It brought back too many memories for him.

The fact that Ryan had acted so uncharacteristically, that he had chosen to get so drunk today of all days, that, and his outburst earlier didn't bode well to Sandy.

Ryan opened his eyes slowly. Shit, it felt like someone had smacked him around the head with a baseball bat and his mouth felt like something had died in there.

The events of the night before started to come into focus, the last real thing he remembered was drinking a large glass of scotch at Holly's party. Things got a little hazy around that point.

How the hell had he gotten home? He looked over to where Sandy was asleep in the chair, then to the bucket by his bed. Oh crap, so he hadn't managed to get past Sandy and Kirsten's radar. He got up and stumbled to the bathroom. He needed to clean his teeth, pee, and throw up, he wasn't sure in which order.

Sandy was awake when he opened the bathroom door. He sat on the bed with two headache tablets and a glass of orange juice. Ryan sat down next to him.

Sandy wordlessly handed him the tablets and the juice, which Ryan took and swallowed down.

"Sorry." Ryan's voice was low.

"That was quite a state you got yourself into last night" Sandy was staring at Ryan, making him more uncomfortable.

"Ryan, surely you, of all people, know that getting drunk doesn't solve your problems?'

Ryan continued to stare at the floor while Sandy waited for a response.

"O.K so you don't want to talk, so listen. Yesterday was shitty for you. We know that, and that's the only reason we aren't grounding you. You are going to apologise to Kirsten for breaking her planter. You are going to apologise to Seth and Luke who had to clear up your vomit, you got that"

Ryan nodded.

"Ryan, I know things haven't been easy for you growing up, I get that but you have to realise that there are consequences to your actions. I know from what you said last night that your father wasn't the best, but you have the opportunity to forgive and forget now. Bitterness will only fester inside you. You have the chance to say goodbye, get some closure."

Sandy sighed.

"I wish I had had the chance with my father, but my mother decided for the both of us that we wouldn't go to his funeral. She had never gotten over the fact that he had left. I had learnt that sometimes people do things that they regret. There was a reason that my father felt he had to leave. My mother never understood that. Ryan you have to learn to let things go."

Ryan shut his eyes, trying to grasp what Sandy was telling him. He wanted him to forgive?

How the hell could he begin to forgive a man who had taken away his innocence? Who had repeatedly hurt him even though he begged him to stop, who had taken away every shred of self worth and had left his son a fucked up empty shell. How do you forgive the man who had left behind such self loathing and insecurity?

He could feel the anger welling inside of him. All the feelings he'd been suppressing for years were rising. Sandy was trying to help, he knew that, but he didn't understand, couldn't understand how he felt.

He got up and rounded on Sandy.

" Get this shit out of your head that we are alike, that's crap Sandy. Our situations are NOT alike, your dad left probably because he was banging his secretary. Shit happens Sandy. You can forgive that? That's great but don't sit there telling me I should forgive, don't give me some sanctimonious crap that I'll have closure. I'll never have fucking closure where that man is concerned."

Ryan stalked to the bathroom.

"Ryan…" Sandy was shocked by the raw passion in the boy's speech.

"Just leave me the fuck alone Sandy"

With that he slammed the door shut, leaving Sandy sat on the bed, at a loss as to where trying to have a heart to heart with Ryan had turned into such a mess.

" Hey buddy, how ya feeling" Seth had tiptoed in and was now whispering.

Ryan fought the urge to pretend to be asleep and sat up.

"Ahhh It lives! Mom told me ta give you these." He placed a tray down. "The tablets are for your head, the soup will make you feel better according to Mom and don't worry, Rosa made it."

Just smelling the soup made Ryan's stomach flip, he took the tablets from the tray and dry swallowed them, then pushed the offending soup away.

"Sorry for last night Seth, apparently Sandy put you and Luke on clean up duty… I owe you one."

Seth made a face. " It was a punishment for laughing as you threw up on Dad's shoes! It was not pleasant Ry."

"Oh God I didn't" Ryan looked at Seth to see if he was winding him up, he had a sneaking suspicion that unfortunately Seth was telling the truth.

" It gets worse, you upset Marissa by practically humping Holly in front of her, you nearly exposed yourself in front of my girlfriend and Luke decked you…. I'd say Ryan that, all in all, the evening was not one of your greatest triumphs" Seth laughed at Ryan's stricken face.

"There's a reason why I don't drink Seth, and you witnessed it last night. I hadn't partied like that in a while. People didn't give a shit in Chino if you did stuff like that but it doesn't translate well to Newport. Sorry."

" Hey that's O.K. Don't beat yourself up over it, you had a rough day yesterday. We know that. Summer and Luke want to come to the funeral tomorrow if that's alright, you know…to show support and stuff…." Seth trailed off when he saw the look on Ryan's face.

"You don't have to do that, any of you." Ryan sighed" Let me guess. This is some plan you have all cooked up. Cause If I'm guessing right Trey ain't coming and God knows where Dawn is…am I right"

Seth turned a shade of beetroot. "We just thought…"

"I'm not little orphan Annie. I'll be fine on my own."

"Well I don't think you have much choice in the matter unless you want to face one of Summer's rage blackouts…so you're stuck with us I guess." Seth replied.

Ryan ran his fingers through his hair.

" Thanks Seth." It would be good to have them there and Seth would help him hold it together.

Seth fidgeted a bit then blurted out. "So what happened with Dad earlier? He looked really upset when he came out of here. Then they closeted themselves in his study. All I could hear was raised voices."

Ryan got up; the bathroom was becoming quite a sanctuary at the moment.

"It was nothing Seth, he was just annoyed about me coming home drunk that's all."

Ryan wasn't a natural liar, he turned around to avoid Seth's gaze and started to gather some clothes. "I'm going to grab a shower, I probably smell like a polecat."

With that he left Seth and retreated to the bathroom.

Ryan turned on the shower and let it run. He let his back slide down the door and sat on the floor. If he could just make it through the funeral, he'd be all right. He would apologise to Sandy for his behaviour and they could all just get back to normal. He couldn't let his father screw up the one good thing that had happened in his life but he hated the way that even in death his father still had a hold on him.

There was a bang on the door making him jump.

"Just make sure you eat the soup, otherwise Mom will be on the warpath." Seth yelled.

He heard the pool house door shut as Seth left. Ryan rested his head on his knees and just sat there staring at the falling water.

Tbc