Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.
Warnings: Just the usual.
Summary: Narcissia dies and Lucius spends a morning grieving with Severus. It's simple. And it sucks ass. Please try not to totally flame my brains out, okay?
When I woke, he was sitting, appearing as though it was the first day of his life. They say that's how people look after a loss. People like Lucius, anyway. He was still beautiful. White from the sky— from the window— pierced his cheeks with a stale shine, making him appear porcelain. And his eyes were twisted with gray indifference. So aloof he was gorgeous. But if you analyzed him more closely you would see that he was donning something of an afternoon shadow. And his lips were very chapped, abandoned by words. Still, you had to have studied his face on quite a few occasions to know that he didn't look his best.
I almost reached up to stroke his hair when he abruptly turned in my direction, staring coolly down at me.
"Oh… Severus. You're… awake."
I cleared my throat, feeling like an awkward schoolboy. "As are you."
He rubbed his eyes fiercely and looked at me. He paused and waited for something. I don't know what. Then he sighed, frustrated. "Perhaps we should get up then?"
"Naturally," I said somewhat more quickly than I had intended. And I stood even swifter.
I examined his room for a moment. All the curtains on the tall windows were open. We'd forgotten to close them the night before, I suppose. Not that it really mattered. People didn't exactly stand about Lucius's window. And we'd been quiet, I thought. What was amazing was how spotless his bedroom was. The floor was untouched, the walls without a smudge. It would have surprised me if I didn't know how precise his house elves were.
His hand clutched my wrist. Damn.
"Severus," he hissed. "I didn't want to say this, but it's obvious that I must. I do not want this to happen again. This… sex. I don't want it. If you hadn't gotten me so intoxicated and practically forced my cock down your throat, I never would've agreed to it. This isn't Hogwarts anymore." He breathed deeply, finished with his speech. I was biting my tongue, killing myself so I wouldn't remind him that I'd done everything in my power to prevent him from drinking last night, that I'd been a very reluctant lover, and that I'd never been happier than when we'd been together in Hogwarts.
"Lucius, you underestimate me. I never assumed there'd be a second time. I know you are grieving."
The anger in Lucius's eyes evaporated. Emotionless again. "Yes… grieving. That's right."
I couldn't resist. And I petted his arm. "Indeed."
His eyes snapped to me. "Would you like to go for a walk."
"Yes, of course." I almost smiled at him. He didn't notice. And he walked ahead of me into his cold house.