A/N : This the sequel to Innocent Reminder, as requested by almost everyone who reviewed it! Thanx to all the reviewers; Brunettepet, Moonjava, ness345, kori hime, Demonica Mills, Melanthe Vida, Nitte iz, wolf116, spikespet2002, Buffy Fan, sheilamarie, Moluvsnumber17, spikes-slayer29590, and The loner.
Rating : PG
Summary : Sequel to 'Innocent Reminder'. After the incident in LA with Psycho-Slayer Dana, Spike travel to Europe with Andrew, to see Buffy.
(Disclaimer : Joss owns the characters)
A Place Called Home
The comatose form of Dana the mentally disturbed Vampire Slayer was wheeled into the building on a gurney. Buffy and Giles got paperwork from the nurse and discussed the case, barely noticing Andrew's arrival. He followed the original Slayer and her Watcher into the next room, as Dana was taken upstairs. Buffy was deep in conversation with Giles and really not at all happy when Andrew tried to claim her attention, with talk of his trip and a vampire she'd sooner not hear about since his apparent shift to the dark side.
"I brought souvenirs from LA..." the boy continued and Buffy snapped at him.
"Andrew would you just stop talking about Angel and your stupid trip, I don't want anything from the...I..." she stopped, words not forming properly as she felt a presence behind her. She could barely believe what she was feeling, not even when she turned and saw him standing there, framed in the doorway.
"Hello, Buffy" said Spike as his blue eyes took in her form, so glad to see her again. She was even more beautiful than he remembered if it were possible.
"He came back" Andrew grinned excitedly, "He was at Wolfram & Hart and..."
"Andrew, shut up!" Buffy said sharply, putting her hand up to silence him, her eyes never leaving the vampire a few feet away "Is it you?" she asked, voice shaking with emotion as they both took a hesitant step forward.
"Yeah" Spike nodded slowly "'S really me, pet"
Taking hold of a joyfully tearful Andrew's arm, Giles silently took the boy out of the room, though both men stayed by the door, unable to not watch the scene unfold.
"How did you...?" Buffy frowned, then shook her head "No, don't tell me yet, I just want to..." she stepped forward further and reached a hand out to Spike's cheek. He shivered at her soft touch, the one he thought he might never feel again. He hadn't noticed that his eyes had closed of their own accord until she spoke again and he looked at her.
"You, you're real" she was almost crying and barely able to get the words out. Spike felt equally moved by the moment as he took her other hand in his and squeezed it.
"God I missed you Slayer" he admitted, glancing down at their joined hands and then up at her face "Didn't realise just how much til that little chit of yours started yammering on..."
"What?" she interrupted, not understanding what he meant.
"Er, Dana" he started to explain, "Y'know she's got Slayer memories? Even got a few of yours in there"
Buffy shook her head, like she still didn't get it.
"It wasn't Angel that stopped her" she realised, "it was you?"
"Yes, luv" Spike nodded, somehow he'd just assumed she already knew, but there was no way she could've, "Started to realise I was safe when she was channelling you" he smiled slightly, his thumb rubbing the back of her hand as he held onto it, "Made me feel bloody guilty though when she said I left you" he admitted, eyes unable to meet hers, especially when she answered him.
"You did leave me" she pointed out, "and I know you didn't get much of a choice but...it hurt" Buffy stumbled through what she meant to say, neither of them doing too well at keeping their focus on each others faces, "especially when I tried to tell you I...how I felt about you, and you didn't believe me"
"Oh I wanted to, pet" Spike assured her, "more than anything I did but...I know you" he said, finally making himself face her properly, eye to eye, "I know your compassion and all. Reckoned maybe you were giving a dying bloke his last wish, y'know"
"I was" Buffy nodded, making him wince a little, "but I didn't lie, Spike" she was quick to add, "I knew I cared about you, I knew I had love for you but it was only then I realised just how much I felt it...and then you were gone and, I was so lost"
"I'm sorry, luv, truly" he swore to her, as he pushed her hair back behind her ear and wiped a stray tear from her cheek, "I didn't want to hurt you. Just didn't know what to think is all, and I was so bloody determined you had to get out of that Hellmouth alive, even if I had to burn for you to do it" he explained, "I might've saved the world that day, but it was still all about you, Buffy" he said softly, "I did what I did for you alone"
With a mere hairs breath between her lips and his, and pure longing to be close to him overwhelming her, Buffy's hand slid behind Spike's head and pulled him into a tender kiss. She had to make him see this was love, this was real. No more using and abusing, no more just wanting to feel, this was real love, a total heart and soul deal. When they broke apart a moment later, foreheads still touching, Buffy sighed.
"There's no danger right now, is there?" she said softly "No Hellmouth gettin' all crumbly, so no excuses, Spike" she pointed out, making a point of meting his eyes when she made her declaration, "I love you, okay?"
A grin spread over Spike's face, a sight that Buffy had missed so much.
"Better than okay, pet" he told her, "Bloody fantastic!" he declared as he kissed her with all the passion he felt, "I love you too, always did, never stopped, never could" he told her between kisses, "should've come back sooner, left LA and..."
"What!" Buffy said suddenly pulling away "Hold on a sec" she frowned, a hand on his chest, pushing him back for a minute, "How long were you in LA?"
"Er, well" Spike shifted awkwardly, "in total about six months" he muttered "but in corporeal form only a few weeks!"
"Weeks, months..." Buffy echoed, stepping back "you were back and you never even..."
The Slayer turned her back on him feeling so confused and kind of hurt to think Spike had come back and not bothered to come straight to her.
"Buffy, it's not how it sounds" he told her, approaching her, backing off fast when she spun round angrily.
"Then explain it to me!" she yelled, "You were the one, Spike, the one that actually meant it when you said you'd stay, at least I thought you were" she ended sadly, unable to look at him right now.
"I was" Spike protested, "I am" he said, reaching for her, but she shrugged him off "Buffy will you soddin' listen for a second" he snapped, making her turn around. Again she pulled out of his grasp.
"No, I won't 'soddin' listen'!" she told him angrily, "My God, you just, you stand there and say you love me, that you're so thrilled that I still love you too, if you cared so damn much why were you hanging around in LA so long!" she wanted to know, eyes flashing with fury and Spike got equally as annoyed and loud at her unspoken accusations that he didn't love her enough anymore.
"Cos I was bloody petrified, okay!" he shouted, stunning Buffy and himself really, since he hadn't intended for it to come out quite like that. He might not be the Big Bad anymore but he had his pride, he didn't admit to being scared but that he'd said was true.
"Slayer" he sighed, looking between the floor and her face, "You can't imagine what it was like when I was a ghost and all, knowing I was back in the world that you were in and not able to be at your side" he explained, "When I got made corporeal again I was straight down to the docks, half way to buying a boat ticket to come to Europe, find my girl" he smiled, glad she didn't flinch at the term, "but I didn't know if you'd want that anymore. Buffy, those last few nights in Sunnydale, I meant it when I told you they were the best of my existence" he told her honestly, "Knowing you even trusted me at all after everything that had gone between us...I can't even tell you what that meant to me. Even if I wasn't certain you loved me, I burned knowing you at least cared enough to tell me you did. That was all I needed" he shrugged, "Powers That Be shoved me back into existence and it kinda threw a dampener on my big exit" he smirked, "You die for love and honour and all that, seems sort of anti-climactic to show up a few weeks later sayin' it was all a mistake or whatever"
Spike's eyes were on the ground when he finished speaking, almost afraid of what Buffy would say next. Theirs was not the simplest or prettiest of relationships, and despite the way things had changed over time, there was no guarantees she wouldn't just smack him in the face right now and tell him to sling his hook!
"Are you done with the speechifying now?" she asked with faux-annoyance and he smirked as he looked at her.
"Must've got that from you I s'pose" he said with a tilt of his head, "Got pretty good at it back in old SunnyD"
Even Buffy managed a half smile at that. The two of them really were kind of stupid. For so long she couldn't accept his love for her and as soon as she realised it was real and she loved him too, it was Spike that had issues with believing and understanding.
"Spike, the fact that I love you still stands but my God I forgot what an idiot you can be!" she smiled good-naturedly, as she came towards him again, "You know me better than anyone, sometimes better than I know myself. How is possible you thought anything but my wanting and needing you in my life would matter when you got back?"
"Dunno, pet" Spike shrugged as Buffy's hand slipped into his once again, "Too much to dare to dream I s'pose, that you might actually be happy to see me"
"Happy to see you?" the Slayer almost laughed at the absurdly tame wording, "Spike, they don't have a word for how much happy I feel with you standing right there, if this feeling gets any bigger I'll explode..." she made a face as she added "and that came out way more graphic than I meant it"
Spike almost laughed at that.
"Guess livin' on the Hellmouth so long makes everything a bit literal..." his voice trailed away and the atmosphere became awkward, neither of them really knowing what the next move was.
"Er, what happens now with the Psycho Slayer?" Spike asked eventually, realising he really did want to know that she'd be okay.
"I dunno exactly" Buffy told him, "Dana needs help, obviously, but...why do you wanna know?" she checked, thinking it strange he'd be so bothered.
"Let's just say I owe her one" Spike explained, "Doubt I'd be standing here now if she hadn't broke out in LA"
"What exactly did she say to you?" Buffy wondered aloud, thinking it odd that it had been months since Spike's return and yet it wasn't until he had a confrontation with Dana that he came to find her.
"Pretty much what you just told me, some that I already knew" Spike told her, "That I left you, that you missed me. S'pose when she said it I realised it had to be true, couldn't just be me waiting it to be right anymore y'know" he smirked, "'Sides when she got all teary, sort of reminded me of the Bit too" he said with a bit of a faraway look in his eyes "That Summer when you were gone...got me thinkin', what if you'd come back and stayed away from me. Realised then I at least had to give you the choice, see whether you wanted me or not" he said, meeting her eyes.
Buffy stepped forward further into his embrace, still a little worried that this was some kind of dream and he might disappear at any second.
"I want you, Spike" promised him, "God you have no idea how much" she said as they wrapped their arms around each other and hugged each other tight, "I missed you so much, promise me you'll never leave me again?"
"I promise, luv, I do" Spike told her, kissing the top of her head, "Gonna take a bloody lot to make me leave again"
Beyond the door, Andrew still watched the scene, with Giles who had intended to walk away and found he couldn't til he knew everything was okay between his Slayer and the vampire she'd missed so much.
"It's so beautiful" Andrew said tearfully as the pair kissed once again, almost a visible glow of love emanating from them.
"Yes" Giles agreed quietly, "let's hope it stays that way"
The End
A/N2 : I have an idea for another short scene with Spike and Dana...I'm not certain if it's going to work yet but we'll see what happens. In the meantime, reviews on this would be lovely, thanx :-)
