Hate Me

A Naruto fan-fiction

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

The Cause of Keloids

A lot of this is in response to Danny, who gave me the best ideas of what to say, or, answer.

I won't explain everything, since some of it is just my little secret.

This is my theory, piece by piece:

I didn't know anything past the chunin exams, and there fore created by own idea of how things happened for Gaara later. I could never imagine someone as deep as him (in my mind, mind you) giving up all of his ways over one speech by a blonde haired maverick. I couldn't do it. So I created my own idea of what eventually pushed him over the edge.

Basically, Gaara had four years to think things over. Since Naruto's speech did do something, he left, about a month after the chunin exams, for a journey to find something, to understand it, and find his worth in it. The thing he was looking for is, actually, revealed, but you have to think. I don't even imply it, but it should be obvious. During those two years that he journeyed, he was mentally assaulted, as you know. After killing the man who was doing it, he came home.

By this point, Gaara had come to the conclusion that he not only had no point in life, but also did not deserve what he had been searching for. His old motto was "to live by myself, and to love myself" but that changed to "live by myself, that I should not spread my own disease". He began to think of himself as pointless, a thing erupted from the depths of hell. Basically, he was suicidal. The problem? He couldn't kill himself, and neither could others. But killing others never stopped for him. Although he wanted to do away with himself, the idea of not doing away with others, which was still his focal point in life, seemed stupid. A part of him believed this was because it was the only thing he felt he could do; another part of him loved the rush.

By now, Gaara is living in a dark place, in reality and in his mind. The memories of his two-year escapade and the exams, as well as sprinklings of child hood and recent memories, plagued him. Everywhere he went, when he saw any kind of companion ship, a kind of curiosity arose in him, and words flooded to his mind.

When Gaara first met Sakura, he wasn't as surprised at Naruto's defense and her casual greetings with Tsunade, but her episode with Rock Lee at the apartment was very strange for him. Eventually things piled up, and the more time he spent with this sweet, happy, people-surrounded cherry blossom with a quick attitude and simple thoughts, the more he felt overwhelmed, possibly even alienated. When she finally offered him friendship, a part of him that had died away since the exams began to come back to him in waves. It was the same part of him and remembered his uncle's betrayal, his siblings fear, and so much more. Anyone and everyone that had ever offered him a companionship had hurt him, or he had hurt them. He felt, in his uncertain, spinning moment that he had to show her, "make her see". It was the only thing that made sense to him, so he grabbed it and ran with it.

This lead to Sakura's short death. In his rush, Gaara had never considered the fact that Sakura could die, even though he screamed it at her…he had used it more as a tool to induce fear, in hope that she would take back her offer and banish him. When he realized he had killed her, the "disease" spread again, attacking him, and he resorted to saving her, at the cost of apart of the curse that keeps him alive. Because part of his curse is gone, or is weaker, when he came back to see her, he had a large scar across his cheek.

Sakura had known from the day he had slapped her that this wasn't going to end neatly. But she felt that if she helped him, it would be enough. With that resolution, she did what ever she could to help him.

Gaara returned because he felt a kind of peace at Konoha, and felt it was the best place for him to regroup, recreate himself, that he might lead the life he had always seen in others. He would never become like any normal person, but at least he would live a bit more normally, and learn what it was to live, love, and learn.

In addition to not knowing what happened to the exams, I also did not know why he had his tattoo, so I made up the Seven Deaths curse. Her gave part of his curse to Sakura, because he knew that with it she would forget her death, i.e., the memories, and that it would bring her back to full health. The sand was his own personal touch, because being a killer made him realize that you could die at any time, and he wanted her alive when he came home.

When Danny told me that he went to the sand village and became Hokage, I decided to add that to my little story line. So, in my head, I now made it that he recuperates in Konoha, and the leaves to bring that kind of peace to his real home. Sakura and him are still close.

Thank you, for reading this. It means a lot.

And if a sequel is in demand…well, you never know, do you?

It does take time to heal wounds and scars, and surgeries to be rid of keloid tissue.

In conclusion, thank you all for reading this, and reviewing.

IHearVoices