Place: Madame Keeri's Karaoke Bar

Time: 10:17 pm

Status: Intoxicated

~*~*~*~

The dull lights of Madame Keeri's Karaoke had never been so inviting as they were tonight. When reality just became too "real", it was necessary to unwind and forget it, even for a short while. The inhabitants of Madame Keeri's were no exception; reality is a nice place, but they don't want to stay there for too long. Standing on the oaken stage was a drunken man, singing (rather off-beat) "Real World". Coincidence? I think not.

Taking their usual places at the mahogany wood bar, careful not to tip over in their barstools, two girls returned from the rather urgent bathroom meeting. Tequilas never have wanted to stay down too long, and the porcelain god was demanding tribute, refusing to take no for an answer.

Against their own brand of logic (one that doesn't resemble Earth logic), they asked for their ninth round of drinks, demanding they receive them before the porcelain god beckoned for them again. Madame Keeri didn't want them puking all over her bathroom, but she also did not want them to start wailing mournfully again. The drinks were given immediately, and were drunk almost as quickly. The girls were pleased.

Stepping inside the old wooden door, a familiar blonde girl entered, shaking her coat and umbrella free of rain from outside. Her hair was damp and stuck slightly to her face, giving her a slightly psychotic look. She pulled off her wet coat, looking at it with disgust as she hung it up on the hanger by the door. Much like a cat, she didn't like being wet. Much unlike a cat, her coat smelled like wet dog. She was a strange girl indeed.

Briskly walking between the tables filled with customers and empty chairs, she marched up and took her place between the two violently drunk/ill girls. Ordering a shot of whisky, she turned to her companions, smiling widely. Seeing her so cheerful almost made the girls want to punch her face until it was no longer distinguishable.

"So how was your night, girls?" she asked innocently, looking from one drunken girl to the next. Receiving only Death Glare™ from both of them, she continued with her own story. "Well, Merrick first took me out to dinner in that fancy restaurant downtown –"

At the mention of the restaurant, the raven-hair girl proceeded to burst into unmanageable tears, sobbing something along the lines of "Our restaurant!"

"- And then we went to see a movie, the new one. Then, he took me for a walk in the park, and when he was going to teach me how to pilot a mobile suit, it started raining. He kissed me goodnight and dropped me off here, like we agreed to meet, and then I told you my story," she finished, completely ignoring the sobbing girl to her left and indifferent girl to her right. The indifferent girl looked as though she had fallen into a coma, her eyes unblinking, her body unmoving. Comatose was likely, considering the amount of alcohol consumed and the boring story combined.

Moving her head, slurring slightly (that is an understatement; she was slurring a damn large amount), the girl to the right began to say, "I-I can't believe I broke up with him," but couldn't finish because she burst into tears as well, her head falling once again to the counter.

This left the wet-dog-smelling girl very confused. She looked from one sobbing girl to the other, unsure what to do next. Deciding quickly, she took her whisky shot and down it in one gulp. It burned and shocked her senses, which dulled her thinking. She concluded it was a good decision, and ordered another whisky shot, only without the glass and directly from the bottle. Another good decision; she was getting smarter after all.

"So," she said, trying to talk, but finding her tongue was slightly paralyzed, "How are you girls doing?"

Immediately ceasing from sobbing, the raven-haired girl removed her head from the mahogany bar and glared menacingly at the blonde. Through gritted teeth, she uttered darkly, "I just lost my boyfriend of four frickin years!! How do you think I'm doing?"

Pausing for a moment, the blonde responded, "Um...not good?"

"Give the girl a prize!"

The blonde's happy demeanor flickered for a moment. She knew Hilde was an angry drunk, but didn't appreciate being treated like an idiot (although she was and everyone knew it). Carefully turning away, looking at the other girl, she asked gingerly, "How are you, Dorothy?"

Also removing her head from the bar, Dorothy responded slowly, her voice thick from crying, "Tore out his heart, I did. Then I took it, and threw it, and stepped all over it until it was a little smear on the floooor!" She ceased her agonizing yell, but shortly burst into tears once again.

Now Relena was greatly afraid for her own life. It was dangerous to be stuck between two anti-sober girls who just broke up and were on the verge of killing someone. Trying to find a way to lighten the mood, she asked, completely out of the blue, "Hey, would a dyslexic sheep say 'Aaab, Aaabb'?"

Looking at her as if she were from another planet, Hilde lowered her glass of beer from her mouth. "How the hell do you come up with that weird shit?"

Dorothy paused for a moment, contemplating a response. "I think it would. Or, it would say 'Aba'," she said, wiping her eyes on her sleeves, "Abba, Fernando. There was something in the air that night, the stars were bright, Fernando! They were shining there for you and me, for liberty, Fernandohh"

Now looking at Dorothy as if she were from another planet, Hilde decided it was best to stop her from singing before she reached 'If I had to do the same again, I would, my friend, Fernando' and burst into tears, again. She stopped her by throwing her beer at Dorothy.

After receiving the full container of alcohol in her face, Dorothy felt she had hit rock bottom. She may also have felt this because she fell to the ground in a pathetic attempt to dodge the beer. Pulling herself into a sitting position, she said, "Quatre was perfect, and then I stabbed him in the heart! I'm so horrible!"

"Yeah, I mean no, no – yeah…no. I don't know," Relena, replied, unable to decide the best response. Quickly finishing the bottle, she turned to the other girls. "You're both being wussies. ' Go get someone else', isn't that what you told me? I didn't want anyone else besides Heero, but you didn't care! 'Its simple, he'll never love you, go find some guy that'll take an ugly bitch like you'!"

"We never said that."

"You implied it. Never mind, I forgot that Merrick is completely hot!"

"Rub that in our faces, why don't you?"

"Okay, nyah nyah he's hot and I got him! Nyaaaah!"

"Bitch."

"I know. I feel so good!"

"Idiot."

"I know. So does everyone else."

"Whore."

"I AM NOT!!"

And thus, a fight broke out that no one in their right mind would want to see. Although I am not sure we are all in our right minds, let's pretend we are and move on.

~*~*~*~

Meanwhile, in a bar not too far from Madame Keeri's...

~*~*~*~

An unfamiliar sight lay inside an unfamiliar bar, a bar named the "Tight End". A sports bar, but it sounded like something else... Anyway, inside the bar were three men sitting at the cedar counter, sipping from their beer cans. However, unlike the three girls, their capability of holding in alcohol was much higher and hadn't paid homage to the porcelain god yet.

Not one of the boys seemed to be in the mood to talk, simply the mood to drink. They gazed miserably at their beer cans, wondering how soon they may crush them against their heads. One boy sat with a look of indifference on his face, trying to decide why he had come here in the first place. Finally, one of them broke the silence.

"Would a dyslexic sheep say 'Aaab, Aaabb'?"

"How the hell do you come up with that weird shit, Duo?"

"Never mind, Quatre; I was just trying to start a conversation."

Silence followed for a moment, until finally the blonde youth began, taking a sip from his beer, "Why did you break up with Hilde? You completely broke her heart."

Duo responded, "I did?"

Looking at him, amazed by his thick-headedness, Quatre replied, "Yes! She was in tears during her battle today; how could you not notice?"

Not sure how to respond, Duo said, "She…she didn't care what I had to say about her fighting in the RMSTC. She didn't sound like she really cared when we broke up. Anyway, she could get hurt, just like she almost was hurt today."

"Bullshit."

Quatre and Duo looked surprised at Heero, who was no longer focusing his attention on how much he didn't want to be here. Continuing, Heero said, "She was hurting badly after your break up. And just because she never asked you to compete, you got pissed off and threatened her. You pushed her and, this time, she pushed back."

Looking uncomfortable, Duo scratched lightly at his head. "Maybe…but she still could've gotten really hurt today. I'm going to ask her to leave again tomorrow. I love her, and I don't want her hurt."

"You're a moron, Duo."

"Excuse me, Quatre?"

"I said you're a moron," he repeated, setting his beer can onto a coaster. "Duo, Hilde is practically the nicest girl we know. She did everything for you: cook, clean, your laundry, and still that wasn't enough. Now she's gone and you're all alone. Face it, you're gonna die on your own."

"I will not! I can take care of myself!"

Laughter broke out between the remaining two boys. This caused Duo to get even angrier, throwing a coaster at each of them. "Shut up, its not that funny." Changing his mood quickly, Duo said, "Quatre, you're single now right? How the hell did you get rid of the pointy-eyebrow Devil?"

"What did I tell you about calling her the Devil?"

"Its…offensive to the Devil?"

Shaking his head, Quatre responded, "She broke up with me, for no reason. Apparently, she's not into guys who are 'nice, caring and sweet'. Bitch."

"That's because she's the Devil! She would be into molesters and rapists, people like that."

"Enough Duo," Heero said warningly.

Muttering an apology, Duo bowed his head down ashamedly, quietly saying, "Didn't mean to hurt your feelings, Satan."

 Continuing, Quatre said, "I guess it's for the best though, right?" Sighing, he added, "but I'll miss her. I loved the way she decided what she wanted, and - just – went out there and did it. No questions."

"You love a short leash."

"I guess…"

Snickering, Duo added, "You were her bitch."

"Shut up! I was not!"

And, for the second time tonight, a completely pointless fight broke out. Perhaps the first has come to its pointless conclusion…

~*~*~*~

Back to where we were earlier…

~*~*~*~

No longer at the mahogany bar, Relena, Dorothy and Hilde were situated around a circular table near the back of the bar. Glaring darkly at each other, under the watchful eye of Madame Keeri, they awaited the arrival of Lucrezia Noin; their designated driver for this evening (A/N: always drink responsibly! Have a dd! : D).

Hilde looked as though she wanted to finish the fight they begun, rubbing her sore jaw attentively. Relena may not look it, but she packed a wicked right hook. Hilde's lip was slightly split, dried blood covering the crack, and her jaw a bit puffy and enlarged. Relena herself had a large bruise forming on her head (where Hilde had grabbed her and bashed her head into the bar) above her right eye. Dorothy had no bruises; she stayed at the bar, sobbing about how miserable she was as the others fought.

Breaking the ominous silence, Hilde said, "Let's play a game." Smiling evilly, she continued slowly, her voice childish, "I spy, with my little eye, something that starts with 'B'."

Playing along, Madame Keeri asked tiredly, "Bar?" Hilde shook her head.

Dorothy asked, "Beer?" negative.

"Booze?" nope.

"Boys?" Another negative.

Pointing slowly towards Relena, Hilde said darkly, "Bitch."

"Why you –"

"Girls! Stop it right now before I have to resort to drastic measures!" Madame Keeri said menacingly, stepping between the girls before they could begin anything.

Sitting back down, the girls shook their heads haughtily, refusing to look at each other. Sighing tiredly, Madame Keeri rubbed her temples slightly, praying silently that Noin would arrive soon. She did.

The front door opened moments later, revealing Lucrezia in a sodden raincoat. "Am I too late?" she asked, moving quickly into the bar. "Have they killed each other yet?"

"Almost. Thank you for coming, Lu. I don't think I could have held them off any longer."

"I don't think I would want to be around them like this either, Dee, but only for you..." Noin replied, shaking her hair as dry as possible. Looking between Relena and Hilde, she muttered, "creepy", and continued to sit at the table with them. The three remained silent, staring at each other with the utmost level of hate. Clearing her throat, Noin began innocently, "How has your plans been going? Have you gotten your revenge yet?"

The effect of this simple question was cataclysmic. Dorothy began sobbing at full strength, wailing and pounding her fist on the table. Relena, knowing already how "happy" the other two were, did the smartest move of her life and ducked underneath the table. Hilde let out an angry cry, standing up, looking as if she would rip Lucrezia's throat out. She indeed was an angry drunk.

Lucrezia let out a cry of surprise and jumped back from the table. Madame Dee Keeri rushed to the girls, giving each a bottle of beer. Almost instantly, everything returned to normal. Relena came out from under the table, Dorothy stopped crying, and Hilde returned to her normal drunken composure. Noin looked at her friend in disbelief. Sighing, Dee Keeri responded, "I've had a lot of experience learning how to calm down drunks. Like a baby, give them a bottle and they shut up."

Slowly, and rather unwillingly, Lucrezia returned to the table, watching closely at the other girls. Trying to start over the conversation, she had decided Relena to be the most sober, and asked if she would like to move to another table. Looking at evil Hilde one last time, Relena hurriedly agreed.

"So, can you tell me what happened to these girls to make them act like this?" Noin asked carefully, making certain they did not overhear.

Sighing, Relena went into the entire story; Duo breaking up with Hilde, Dorothy regretting her breakup with Quatre, Samantha competing, and her new boyfriend, Merrick. Finishing the narrative, Relena took a small sip from the beer bottle Dee had given her.

"Wow," Noin said simply, nodding slowly, "You girls can do some damage in one day."

"Tell me about it. To add to it, both of them are mad at me because I have a boyfriend and they don't," Relena said emotionally, her eyes tearing up for the first time tonight. "I mean, Dorothy and Hilde have had steady boyfriends for the last four years, where as I've been all alone. I finally have someone, and they're completely pissed! They should be supportive, not bitchy to me."

"What about Heero?"

"What about him? He doesn't give a damn about me being with Merrick."

~*~*~*~

At the same time…

~*~*~*~

"Why the hell is she going out with that man-whore, Merrick?" Heero asked slurredly, pounding his fist on the bar top. "Duo, do you remember Merrick? He was in Operation Meteor, right?"

Thinking for a moment, Duo nodded his head drunkenly, "Yeah I do. He's the one who tried to shoot at Dr. J, right?" Taking on an awed tone, he added, "Aww man, he was so cool!"

"He did? I thought he tried to steal a gundam before it was completed…" Quatre asked, his eyes remaining closed. He was tired, and didn't feel like seeing himself completely drunk.

"Maybe…he might've done both. Those were some good times!" Duo replied, smiling widely and stupidly.

 "Guys, guys. Back on the subject. Why would Relena go out with him? He's like a total bastard, and she's a prissy chick."

"Who cares? From the sounds of it, it's a match made in hell. They can have each other."

"I'm just saying that he's not the kind of guy to be careful with a chick. And Relena's the type of girl to put up with anything. Just look at her; she followed me around the freaking world! And I wouldn't even say a word to her!"

Duo looked curiously at Heero. "Why do you care, Heero?" Grinning slightly, he continued, his voice purring teasedly, "Do you love her?"

Blushing slightly, Heero responded, "Of course not, I'm just worried about what Merrick might do to her. Just common concern."

"Mm-hmm, right," Duo responded, not meaning a word. He looked at Quatre, who had fallen asleep at the bar. "I think we'd better head home; Lightweight here seems to have taken all he could," he said, gesturing at the dosing blonde. Heero nodded in agreement, pushing his empty glass toward the bartender and helping Duo carry Quatre to the door.

~*~*~*~

"Noin, what happened to your cheek?" Relena asked, looking curiously at Lucrezia's side of her face.

Covering her cheek with her hand, she responded quickly, "Nothing. Why?"

"It looks kind of bruised and sore. Did you pick a fight with Hilde? Man, she can pack a powerful punch. I think one of my molars came loose in our fight."

"No, I didn't, I -" she said, searching for a response, "I just fell stepping out of the bath tub. That's all." Idiot! That was so stupid!

"Okay…" Relena said, looking as though she didn't believe her. Lucrezia's cheek was covered haphazardly in makeup, an unusual touchup job. "What really happened?"

"Nothing!"

Gasping inwardly, suddenly understanding, Relena said, "Did my brother hit you?!" Seeing Lucrezia's expression, she continued, "He did, didn't he?! I'll kill him for you!" She stood up, stumbling slightly.

"Just listen to me, please. I'm begging you," Noin said pleadingly, pulling Relena back to the table.

Grumbling, Relena said, "Fine. I'll kill him after. Continue."

~*~*~*~

A cliffhanger? Why would Milliardo do such a thing? Is Merrick as bad as Heero seems to think? Does Duo really think Dorothy is the Devil? And what about Heero's concern for Relena… next time, I suppose. This was a long chapter!

Thank you, wonderful reviewers; I love receiving your responses to my story! There is nothing greater than seeing someone reading my story. I'm glad to see everyone so far seems to be enjoying it; I hope it's all right for my first, true fanfic.

Until next time,

Kiwii =)