Legal Stuff

Do I have to write this every chapter! Oh well, these characters belong to Sega/Sonic team/whoever, not me. And if I state otherwise I'm sure they have some very nice Lawyers/goons that will set me straight on the whole issue.

Chapter 2: Recruitment Time

"Next!"

"Why can't I have the job?" protested Tails "I passed every one of your tests and even did better than you on one of them."

"You're too young Tails" said Espio flatly.

Espio was interviewing candidates for the role of ninja weirdo in team chaotix. Espio and Tails were sitting in to cheap wooden chairs in the front room of the office while several other applicants sat outside. While Vector sat in the main office downloading more animal profiles.

"If I'm too young then what was the point in even testing me in the first place if you were already going to say no in the end?" Shouted Tails getting very annoyed now.

"I…don't know, sorry about that but I came off worse from this, I could well drop dead any minute. You still have quite a while left."

"One or two more years if you're lucky Tails!" Shouted Vector through the door into the main office.

"I can see why I could beat you in the IQ test 10 minutes ago now. Said Tails angrily."

"NEXT!" Called Espio louder than before.

"Maybe its not such a bad thing you're bloody dying you retard." Grumbled Tails as he stormed out of the room and sulked in a corner in the waiting room. As Tails left the room Mighty the Armadillo walked nervously into the room and sat down.

"Err, hi" said Mighty quietly. "Remember me?"

"Of course I remember you!" Said Espio eagerly. "You're that dude who came in to fix the photocopier, Gus right?"

"Actually I'm Mighty, I used to be one of you guys."

"Mighty, Mighty," murmured Espio to himself. "Who the hell is Mighty?"

"I thought this would happen, you see a few years ago I was arrested by Sega's secret police. They imprisoned me and destroyed any evidence that I ever existed."

"Quick guys, he's revealed our existence! Get here quick so we can remove him before he reminds people who Nack the Weasel is." Rouge whispered into a COM sensor cleverly disguised as a charm bracelet while sitting in the waiting room.

(Meanwhile back in the interview room.)

"So then, do I get the job?"

"Of course not! Look at your hair! It's red! You're a red head! If you took the job then people would call you the ginger ninja and its hard enough to get people to get anyone to take ninjas seriously as it is in this age of guns and nukes!"

Espio stops here to take a few deep breaths while Mighty looks at him worriedly.

"Are you ok Espio?" Mighty asked sounding slightly concerned.

"Yes, I'm fine so get out of here before people start cracking jokes!"

"Fine then! Said Mighty looking hurt.

"There he is guys! Charge!" Rouge, Omega and for reasons only known by himself Luigi charged in wearing suits and sunglasses. They proceeded to tie up Mighty who Omega then carried away. Rouge hit Espio around the head with a bowling ball causing Espio to pass out instantly while Luigi tore out a page of Espio's interviewees' book and proceeded to eat it. For those who are interested the page contained the following.

Applicant #: 02

Name: Mighty

Species: Armadillo (I think)

Pros: Ex-Chaotix member (supposedly)

Cons: Probably insane, a walking joke.

Yes/No/Maybe so: No

Espio came around about 10 minutes later; Vector was sitting in the corner looking bored.

"I suppose I should bring in the next applicant" said Espio holding his head where the bowling ball hit him. "Next should be Rouge according to my list, call her through Vector." Vector looked around the door to call Rouge through but couldn't see her.

"Rouge, hey Rouge! I don't think she's there Espio."

"Well I suppose she's not getting the job if she won't turn up for the interview, who else is out there?"

"Well" said Vector slowly "Tails is sitting in the corner looking very annoyed and for some reason Cream's here."

Espio's eyes lighted up "Cream can you come in here a second"

"Erm, ok" Said Cream politely walking into the interview room.

"Right well here's the deal-"

"Before we start do you want to know how long rabbits are supposed to live for Cream" interrupted Vector holding up another sheet of paper. Espio quickly dashed over to steal the sheet of paper before ripping it to shreds."

"Damn it Vector! In last 2 days your fact files have killed or virtually killed 2 people now."

"Er…yes…2 people" said Vector nervously.

"Who else?"

"Well remember how Shadow wasn't at your party yesterday" Espio gave Vector a very stern look "What? All I did was show him how to beat the Last Story on Sonic Adventure 2 and he just died while watching the final cut scene."

Espio and Cream both stared at Vector with looks of disbelief on their faces. "Anyway" said Espio finally breaking the silence "I have very little time left before I die, I'm out of applicants for the job and you're in the right place at the right time. Congratulations!"

"Wait a second" said Tails angrily marching into the room "I lost out on the job despite doing well in all the tests because I'm too young yet Cream who is younger than me is offered the job without so much as an interview, how the hell does that work?"

"Well, I guess I'm getting desperate to find someone for the job, I guess I could hire-"

"Hey Tails!" said vector excitedly "apparently you shouldn't be eating chilli dogs with Sonic; this is what foxes should eat."

"Let me see that" said Tails reading one of Vectors dreaded fact-files. "Let's see, chickens, hedgehogs, rabbits. Hey Cream, I'm supposed to eat y-"

Tails stopped talking, his face went dark, a menacing look came about his face.

"Tails, what's wrong, you don't have to eat me, get off me, AAAAAAAAAHHHH! HELLLP!"

Tails chased a screaming Cream out of the room ferociously Espio looked at Vector with a look of utter resentment.

"He…er had a right to know the truth."

"I'll deal with you later Vector" said Espio coldly "but tomorrow we'll go out looking for a new ninja to recruit"

OK, that's the end of this chapter. Hope you enjoyed it. Reviews would be appreciated (unless you're going to be mean). Look out for the third and probably final chapter.