:.Doro walks onto the scene, a twitch lingering at the corner of her mouth. She pulls up a chair, and perches in it, crossing her legs as she raises a hand and points it at the anonymous chicken , Lurker purposefully.: Okay, first of all, if you're going to be flaming my ass, don't be a god damn CHICKEN about it. Put your screen name, I would like to make a response to your kind, considerate donation.
I read over your review a few times. At first I really wasn't happy, I know I said I was allowing flames, but the least you could have done was keep in mind that this was a random, musing type. I did not put all of my effort into this(I didn't really put ANY effort into it, I just sort of let it flow o.O;) and I wrote it late at night, and submitted it for the soul purpose of satisfying my good friend/beta reader. She also told me that it would get a lot of positive feedback, so I figured, "Hey, what the hell, why not?" and she said that she loved it and...well, in a way, didn't give me an option XD.
Ah, and before I forget, I really don't give a shit if you find me immature for submitting this AN's note, but if you do happen to pass by, I have a response for you x). So, if you're curious read on, if not, go the hell away :D. And also before I forget, because I will, to my good reviewers who kept in mind that this was a shot-in-the-dark sort of thing, thank you for your comments, I appreciate them.
Now, back to the matter at hand. If you loathed the story beyond reason, it really isn't that hard to click back or exit the page. So obviously it kept your interest. I apologize for irritating you, but I like giving a Japanese feel. And hell, it's not like I go, "That's so baka of you!" like some of the retards on here, or "That's so kawaii," which sounds AWFUL beyond reasoning. And know what? About my writing style being "erudite" and "pretentious," to that I say "Fuck you, and go die in a ditch. or at least just don't finish reading the story." That's just the way I write. I guess I get a little pompous at night o.O. And, on another note, I use Microsoft Works's thesaurus, which has very vague definitions. I felt the story was obscenely repetetive, hence why I stuck in various instances of things. I'm aware of my word choice being poor, but COME ON, it's Microsoft Works we're talking here!
Lots of fancy words? Well, once more, I had a hard time with word choice, and I didn't try my hardest with this o.O;. You know, I guess "I wrote it late" and all sounds a lot like excuses, but you didn't really expect me to just stand there and take your blows, did you? You went fucking too far.
Now, back to the Japanese portion of it. I watch crappy subtitles, and often, those crappy subtitles or direct translations of Japanese into English stick with me, and come out like that. Sorry o.O;. I wasn't really trying to please the public with this oo. I like getting the point across that it's Detective Conan we're talking about, NOT the oh-so-wonderful dubbed Case Closed. Often I feel that using Japanese words helps me...especially if there's a particular language quirk to the character. Like, Shin'ichi saying "baarou" instead of "baka." I find there to be significant differences between Jimmy Kudo and Kudou Shin'ichi, as well as just about every other fricking character in the two shows. Hey, I guess that's just my opinion. Don't like it? Tough shit. I do have to admit, though, that I went overboard. This tends to happen at night. I guess I did pretty much fail miserably XDD.
Now quoting you, "On to the story itself..." You know, I thought about it. I sat there and mentally panicked about the flames and remarks I might get about this being unreasonable, the "seizure", and her first reaction. Ran is already battling with the fact that Shin'ichi and Conan are the same person, I tried to show that...we know that at the same time as seeing too-extreme similarities between the two that at the same time, Ran is pondering on whether she's going mad at the thought because it would mean that Shin'ichi SHRUNK, and it would also confirm the possibility that he LIED to her. And we all know that Conan goes overboard in telling Ran things. I really tried to relay that across. I've also heard that sometimes when someone hears something EXTREMELY shocking, it can push them into such states as being physically ill. I have a friend who's grown physically ill due to constantly being let down by her artwork(and if you dis that friend, I will kill youm, I swear, you're already on my bad side with your mountainous and unreasonable complaints about my story.) But yeah, back to the point, coming to terms with the fact that Shin'ichi LIED to her for a hell of a long time really shocked the hell out of her. I didn't think I went too far with that, sorry you did, but I'm not really concerned with that part.
Now, as much as I LOATHE admitting it, there are two things I concurr with. My writing wasn't the best, I know that, I've already told you why it was, so whether you take that as an excuse is not my problem. I overdid it with the Japanese terms, I realize this, I will use your review to fix my serious flaws in writing...and I'll make you eat your complaints. Mark my vow. I am still trying to grow as a writer, and I find that I improve every day, so watch out, you little bitcher x). One day I'll make you give me a review where you'll be, like, "...OO...Holy shit, she did it." D
Over all...I want to thank you for sending the review. Arigatou gozaimasu(is that too much for you? u.U;). And yes, I know that this is a desperate measure, but I REALLY wanted you to see my response to your all-too-kind critiquing, so I hope to God you do.
Maybe one day I will redo this piece, and really earn as much feedback as my friend told me I would...nn I'll work for it.
:.The wolf then stands up in her chair, grinning psychotically, applies a white hat very mysteriously(and cheeseily, for that matter), deposits a rose on the chair she sat in, and takes off running into the night, guffawing maniacally.: Expect to see more of my "hideous" writing...and to all a good night! >3 :.disappears over the horizon.:
Ending warnings: I may have been a little hypocritical through all this. Sorry. o.O