You'll never know
Disclaimer: I don't own them. You know the drill
Thankyou for those that wanted another chapter, I'm sorry it took so long and that its not that brilliant, I have been busy with my A levels and what not. Hope that every one else is alright and I send my best wishes out to you all.
Anyway, without further ado, this one is from Bakura's point of view so just read and find out what he has to say on the whole situation.
Hands upon me, lips against my own, a sense of belonging. It seems so real and right, but I know it is nothing more than a fantasy.
How can anything be so perfect in this world? That I will corrupt you is my biggest fear. To turn you into myself, to take away all that is you is something I can't allow to happen. Snowy hair and soft brown eyes leave me breathless so often and I want more than anything to share my feelings with you. You are the only one that would understand me. But it is like opening Pandora's Box; you never know what terrors might be released and whether I would be able to stop the flow once it has begun.
The covers pool around me as I sit up, twisted in disarray like my emotions. You have no idea how much I want to lavish you, to take back all the hurtful things I have done to you, but I can't, I can never let you see the real reason for my behaviour.
Hikari, you are my source of pain and pleasure, a heavenly treat laid before me for my taking. You would deny me nothing, I know, but you are too good for me. I could never live up to the pedestal on which you place me. I am a lowly sadistic tomb robber who finds pleasure in being a sadocist. I must be to treat you so badly.
My thoughts are often too much to comprehend. I think of the life I once led, a petty thief in a great world. I plundered everyone and everything, I suppose in search of the things that would make me whole but never found it. Until now. When I became one with you, I found everything that was missing from my life. You were my light and gave me a reason to fight, though I never told you. Even when things got to the worst possible, you were always there to help me and me for you. I never thought I would be gifted with something so precious, me , who had taken the lives of many and gave nothing. I was given you, and you gave me everything.
And so in the end it came about that I was given a body, a second chance and a life of my own to live. You welcomed me to your home and I accepted though I never once granted you any kind of appraisal. Unfortunately for me, I refused to take it, I am wasting my life, following the same route as before, I can see the ending and it scares me. I know the place I am heading can bring about nothing but my doom, but I do not want to drag you down with me my sweet Ryou.
The feelings you stirred inside me were a weakness, something that I had never yet had in my life, or so I believed. You opened up my heart to possibilities but I shut it back up. I could not have anything making me weak and I knew that in the process I would hurt you. I guess you could say therefore that my behaviour is merely to protect you from the monster I am. I want to show you, push you away so you never have to face a betrayal that I know I will bring to your innocent life. Please forgive me.
And so I stand, stepping over to the chair you have made your place of rest, taking the briefest of glances that will leave me with an eternal memory that will burn inside my head vividly and provide me with more intense dreams than I ever thought possible.
But pushing away the guilt before it sways me, I yank at your arm, pulling you from the chair, fierceness restored to my eyes as the drama continues and I take my act on to another level.
And so it begins.
Forgive me.