Chapter 3

Teddy Bear

"Seth!" I woke up in a panic, forgetting where I was. Seth jumped up suddenly. His hair was stuck to his sweaty forehead. Apparently we had both fallen asleep.

"How are you feeling Sum?" he asked moving away hair that was stuck to my cheek. Once the feeling of panic had worn off I realized that I couldn't breathe very well. My chest felt like it was on fire.

"Not so good," I whimpered. Seth held me.

"You're hot," he said pressing his cool hand against my face.

"I don't feel good," I moaned. I felt dizzy and disoriented. Tears spilled down my flushed cheeks.

"How long has it been since you last ate?" Seth questioned. I racked my brain for an answer. How long had it been? Last Wednesday maybe? I couldn't remember. The only food I remembered eating was the food I agreed to eat in the morning. Seth, Ryan, and Marissa always brought me food to school no matter what even though I wouldn't always eat it out of fear of it not being digested in time.

"Summer," he persisted.

"I don't remember," I said softly.

"Come on," Seth cradled me and lifted me off of the bed.

"What time is it?" I asked. I closed my eyes shut as the harsh light from the hallway met them.

"I don't know. 4 or 5," Seth guessed. We must have fallen asleep after Jerry Springer at 11. Seth and I liked to take pity on others. I know it's not a very common hobby, or a healthy one, but it was just something we enjoyed doing together. Jerry Springer was as far back as I could remember.

"Then that means…,"

"Summer!" Kirsten's voice sounded startled as I felt her near. Sandy and Kirsten were home from work. But where were Ryan and Marissa? They said they were coming right after school. They promised!

"I was just taking care of her," Seth said. I could tell he was just as taken aback as I was. I started wheezing. It wasn't easy to breathe with my ribs still throbbing in pain.

"I'm sorry you're sick Summer. I should call your dad," Kirsten said. My breath caught in my throat.

"No. It's okay," I insisted. I pressed my head closer to Seth. I was scared again. I heard the doorbell chime through the house. Kirsten grabbed Seth's arm and tugged him towards the front door. She pulled the door open wide. Standing on the porch was my dad. I was dead. This was it. This was the end of me. The end of Summer Roberts forever.

"School called me and Mr. Roberts today Seth. Told us that you and Summer didn't show up for school today," Kirsten's arms were crossed over her chest and she didn't look happy. She didn't have to call my dad. He had already been called way before hand.

"Mom! I can explain!" Seth cried.

"We're going home Summer. Put her down if you would son," my dad stated. I panicked again. So this is what it felt like to know the end is near.

"No! No I won't. Mom, listen to me you can't let Summer go home with him," Seth said growing upset.

"Put her down Seth," a new voice came from the staircase. It was Sandy. He was in one of his rare moments of anger. Seth gazed into my teary eyes. He set my feet gently on the floor. I felt my knees immediately buckle underneath me. I was too weak. My ribs were too sore. Luckily Seth still had a hold of my waist.

"I just feel really feverish," I explained. Nothing would stop my flow of tears. Why was this happening to me? What had I done?

"Take her to the car Seth," Sandy stated strictly. Seth cradled me again and slowly followed my dad outside. I saw the hate and anger in his eyes and it scared me. This was a side of my Seth that was never shown. He was my sweet little teddy bear. This side my father brought to the surface brought tears of anger to my face. I cried entirely too much. Sometimes it wasn't even because something specific had happened. I would just break down and sob for hours.

My dad opened the car door and put on a fake smile for Seth. I knew he only did it because Sandy and Kirsten were only a few yards away. I felt hot tears land on my head. Seth was crying. This just made me cry harder. My whole body was racked with sobs as Seth set me into the front seat of the car.

"I love you Summer," he bent into the car to whisper so only I could hear his gentle words. I looked into his tear streaked face and pressed a kiss to his lips. They tasted salty from the tears. He squeezed my hand tightly. "Don't think that I'm going to leave you alone with him." I wasn't quite sure what Seth meant. But he had determination in his eyes as he kissed me one last time before Sandy pulled his sons head out of the car.

"Sorry to be so much trouble to you both," my father said in a cheery voice. I shuddered. His tone dripped with false sweetness and love. Like he was a caring father worried for his daughter. I watched sadly out of the window as my dad pulled his car out of the Cohen's driveway. Seth stood in between Sandy and Kirsten. He was in for it. But I knew I was in for a lot worse.

The ride home surprised me. My dad said absolutely nothing to me. The only sound I could hear was my labored breathing and the pounding of my heart in my ears. I repeated Seth's words over and over again in my head. Once we pulled into the garage my dad got out of the car. He walked over to my side of the car and flung the door open. I tried to shut everything out from there but I couldn't. He grabbed a fistful of my hair and yanked me out of the car. I yelped in pain as he pushed me through the back door.

"You little bitch!" he screamed. I closed my eyes and just pushed a picture of Seth into my mind

"You think you can just run to the Cohen's! You think your little Seth can make you all better?" he taunted. I don't know where I had found the courage. I don't know why I had done it. I don't know how it was possibly for me to do what I did next. But I did. I punched my dad hard in the face. Blood poured from his nose as he stumbled backwards. I definitely would regret it. My body went numb as my legs turned to jell-o. My mind was screaming at them to run but I didn't react. My dad rushed at me and slammed me to the floor. I screamed in pain.

"Daddy! Daddy please!" I sobbed. My rib cage seared in pain. My mind went blank. "Please!"

"This is going to end," my dad said. At first I thought he meant we could be a family again. He could go back to spoiling me and I could go back to being Daddy's little princess. I thought he would say those three words I longed to hear leave him mouth just one last time. 'I love you Summer' I imagined him saying. But instead he reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a silver object. Once I blinked the tears out of my eyes I saw that it was a gun. It was pointed straight at me. I coughed and tasted blood in my mouth. Another cough came and blood trickled out of me, staining our white carpet. This was the end. No more Summer Roberts. I squeezed my eyes tightly shut as I waited for the bang. But it never came. My dad

tossed the gun aside and stumbled off to the liquor cabinet. I opened my eyes and swallowed hard. The living room grew quiet as I was left alone. I heard the garage door open and then the car peal out. After a few minutes I started to sob again.

This was just another sick game of fathers I would have to get used to. I crawled over to the gun and held the cold steal in my hands. It wasn't even loaded. Just another sick game. I threw the gun at the wall and screamed in pain. Was this what my life had come down to? I pulled my knees tightly to my chest and rocked back and forth. I heard the front door creak open and I shut my eyes again in fear of seeing my father standing there.

"Come on sweetheart," a gentle hand was rested on my back. I tensed and then opened my eyes.

"COOP!" I shrieked throwing my arms over Marissa. I sobbed as Ryan picked me up in his arms and he and Marissa took me out of the front door.

"You didn't tell anybody did you?" I asked, fearing I already knew the answer. I pushed my head into Ryan's chest. He used to be just Chino to me. But he grew into a lot more. He cared so much for me and Marissa and Seth. I knew he would lay his life down in a heartbeat for any of us. That's why I was afraid that he had gone to somebody. I was amazed he had lasted as long as he had. I knew he was fighting a battle inside. Go against what I wanted to help me, or go with his promise and be truthful to what I wanted. I knew Seth and Marissa were fighting that battle too.

"No, don't worry Summer," Marissa soothed. She sat in the back seat. Ryan rested my head on her lap and spread the rest of me out in the back seat. She stroked my hair gently.

"We did go to the hospital though. You can be there without anyone you don't want knowing," Ryan said.

I was so emotionally drained I didn't even try to argue. That's where they were taking me. I felt Marissa hold my hand.

"Seth snuck out. He's waiting for us," she said. I smiled. There it was again. Just the mention of Seth and I was smiling again. He amazed me.

"I knew that would get something out of you," Marissa smiled and continued to stroke my hair.

"He's my teddy bear," I murmured. I closed my eyes and was listening calmly to the soft sounds of the ocean outside of the car.

"Aww! Sum, that's so sweet!" Marissa said. Ryan found it funny.

"Hey," Marissa scolded. "Aren't you my teddy bear?" I snorted.

"Chino's more of a bunny I think," I said. I felt myself giving into sleep.

"You're my bunny then," Marissa said, poking Ryan affectionately in the shoulder. I couldn't wait until the day came that Seth and I could run away together. Sleep finally overtook me as my mind drifted off into a life I knew I would probably never live to know.