Updating four stories every weekend sure takes a big chunk out of my social life. Or maybe, just the time that would be my social life, if I had one. ^_^! And hey thanks for the reviews! Sinful1, I loved your long review! I'm glad that the story has been enjoyable for you. Yeah, I have been trying to give the characters more depth then I feel most people give them credit for and I'm trying hard to focus on both Ryuuen's real world life and the other one. It's kind of difficult though because I'm faced with Ryuuen real world life which is nothing but character time (thinking and all that) but all the "action" is in the other world. So often times I wonder if I'm focusing too much on one world or the other. And thanks for the reassurance about not lagging. I keep wondering if the story is going too slow but I don't want to go too fast either. Don't let anyone tell you writing is easy.

Disclaimer: I don't own Fushigi Yugi.

Warnings: Rokou! And…

Somewhere Out There

Chapter Eight

            That day I was wondering about whether the others had reached the dreaded Mt. Reikaku bandits and hoping that everyone was safe. I tried to tell myself that Miaka would be fine with two seishi, but part of me was apprehensive. I found that my thoughts kept going back to Saihitei and hoping he was fine.

            It turned out it was a Saturday and I had set my alarm clock for no reason. I could have stayed longer in Konan if it hadn't been for that stupid thing. I couldn't get back to sleep which also irritated me so I got up and got ready for the day.

            I had just been combing my hair after my shower when I heard my mom and dad in the hall. I stopped for a moment, listening hard.

            "I just think…" My mother was probably biting her lip; I could see it in my head. "It would be best…"

            "We could just pack it all away into storage. We could give the clothes to charity." My father suggested but I knew they were hesitating. What were they talking about?

            "I'm just worried what Ryuuen will say." My mother confessed. I got up and peered into the hallway. They were standing in front of Kourin's room. Why were they talking about packing it up? "He might not understand why—"

            "What's going on?" I opened my door all the way and stepped out into the hall. My mother's eyes dropped downwards and my father didn't look like he was eager to discuss the situation with me.

            "We were just talking about maybe packing up Kourin's things for storage." My mother decided it was best not to lie. "Just in case we needed the extra room."

            "Extra room?" I couldn't believe them! "That's Kourin's room! You can't just pack up her stuff! What could we possibly need the extra room for?! Was Kourin taking up too much room when she was alive?" I was getting overly upset and hell, I was probably overreacting but I felt like it was understandable at the moment.

            "Ryuuen, Kourin is dead." My father stated with his eyes closed.

            "Why do people keep telling me that like I don't know that?" I asked angrily. "I know that she's dead."

            "Ryuuen." Rokou came up behind me and put a hand on my shoulder. "Calm down."

            "Don't you dare pack up her stuff!" I rushed past my parents into Kourin's room. "Don't touch it!" And I slammed the door shut. As soon as I had, I fell to my knees. Why didn't they understand?

            "You know…I may not be the best person for this job but if you need someone to talk to or just listen for that matter, I would like you to feel free to come to me."

            I wish I could talk to you right now…

            I wish you were here…

            I realized I was crying again. I really wondered if Suzaku had made the right choice when he decided that this stupid crybaby should be one of his warriors. I half-expected him to show up and tell me it was all a mistake; obviously I was not qualified for such a task.

            I put on one of Kourin's red shirts, discarding my own but keeping my black jeans because Kourin's pants would have been too tight on me. I sat down on her bed. The scent that was Kourin was slowly fading. After it all had faded, what would be left of my little sister?

            How can you just fade away?

            "Ryuuen, I'm coming in." Rokou's voice told me before he opened the door. He looked slightly surprised to find me in Kourin's clothes again. "Come on Ryuuen."

            "Where are we going?" I asked suspiciously.

            "On a trip." Rokou told me. "You need to get out of the house, look how pale you are." He punched my arm playfully as he sat down next to me.

            "I don't feel like it." I picked up one of Kourin's combs and began to finish working the rest of the tangles from my long hair.

            "I'm not going to sit here and watch you waste away like this." Rokou said firmly. "Get up and come with me Ryuuen."

            "Fine." I sighed as I stood up. I followed Rokou out of the house and into Rokou's car. It was a piece of junk but Rokou loved it to death. I remembered that I was supposed to get my car, but that felt so long ago.

            Besides I can't get a car now…

            I promised Kourin she'd be the first person to get to ride in my car.

            "I thought we'd get some breakfast." Rokou told me as we turned into an IHOP. "Mom and Dad will like having the house to themselves." Suddenly I was suspicious once more.

            "Did Mom and Dad tell you to get me out of the house?" I suddenly asked. "So they could get rid of all of Kourin's stuff?"

            "Ryuuen!" Rokou looked insulted as we got out of the car. "You know, it would be nice if you wouldn't act like you were the only person in the world who cared about Kourin! Don't you think we're all going through the same thing?"

            "Then why do people keep asking if I'm alright? Why do people keep walking around on tip-toes around me?" I asked in a demanding tone. "Why did I have to see a shrink?"

            "Because you won't let us help you." Rokou told me seriously. "You keep having these up and down days Ryuuen. Sometimes it's like you're getting better, you know, recovering from it and then other times you sink back down. What do you want us to do? You won't tell us how you're feeling."

            "If we're all going through the same thing, then why should I even have to tell you what I'm feeling?" My eyes were narrowed and it struck me that we were arguing in front of an IHOP. There were people watching us from the windows.

            "Because you're different Ryuuen." Rokou looked down, seeming defeated. "Nobody was closer to Kourin then you. Even I wasn't. And you've always been sensitive to things. You're greatest strength is your heart. Unfortunately, it seems to be your greatest weakness."

            "My greatest weakness?" I was taken aback by these words.

            "Once you have someone in your heart, it's hard for you to let go." Rokou explained. "Remember your parakeet?"

            I had owned a parakeet when I was ten. I thought it was the best thing in the world and I would spend hours hoping I could teach it to speak but unfortunately, it died quite mysteriously three weeks after I had gotten it. I had cried my eyes out at its funeral.

            "Shuu-chan is completely different." I tried to protest.

            "Is he?" Rokou raised an eyebrow. I opened my mouth to say something but nothing came out. Maybe Rokou was right. I just sort of looked down though instead of telling him this.

            We went into the IHOP and ate breakfast. Rokou entertained me with stories of school and then we went back home. I found myself in the backyard, sitting on a swing that I remember Kourin begging our father to make for her. The sturdy oak tree that it was connected to really was the perfect tree for a swing. By sitting there, I could sit and look at the willow tree across the yard.

            That tree had always been my personal favorite. The symbol that glowed on my chest that represented Nuriko was yanagi. Willow.

            As I swung back and forth, I wondered what tonight's adventures would bring. And I thought of Rokou's words.

            My greatest strength…

            It occurred to me that my seishi symbol was next to my heart.

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            Appearing in a moving carriage is really startling—for the other passengers. I didn't really notice but Miaka and Saihitei both looked a bit shocked. From the amount of sunshine outside, I would say that it was the afternoon.

            "Hello!" I greeted everyone. Then I stuck my head out the window of the carriage. "Heeeeeey Kishuku!"

            Poor Kishuku who hadn't been expecting me nearly jumped out of his skin at my sudden appearance.

            "Hello Kourin!" Miaka seemed just as happy to see me.

            "You're looking well." Saihitei smiled graciously and I suddenly felt kind of warm and realized I was smiling like an idiot after a few moments. "Did you have a good day?"

            "Yeah." I glanced away for a moment. When I glanced back I could see that Saihitei wasn't fooled by my bad attempt at lying well. "So where are we?"

            "Not that far from the mountains!" Miaka clapped her hands together. "We should reach them by the evening, at least that's what Kishuku said. Can you go up front and ride with him? I don't want him to feel left out…" I could see that Miaka was the one who'd like to go ride up front but had sent me.

            If you had just told everyone that you were a boy from the get go…

            Miaka wouldn't have been a miko in training anymore and then probably wouldn't have been chosen.

            Yeah, but you wouldn't be feeling so bad.

            I was too much of a coward and so I went to go ride up front with Kishuku. Saihitei looked like he would prefer it if I stayed in the carriage with him and Miaka but after giving him an apologetic look I closed the door behind me. I felt sick for doing all this.

            Kishuku was happy to have some company as we rode along. The mountains were looming into view. It wouldn't be long now.

            "Something on your mind?" Kishuku asked. I wondered if I was just really obvious.

            "Just thinking." I made it sound like it was nothing important but Kishuku was about to demonstrate his perceptibility.

            "You're face is like this." And Kishuku scrunched up his face in a half thoughtful, half worried expression. "I figured you might want to talk about it, you know, get it off your shoulders?"

            "I was just thinking about something my brother said to me." I finally answered. "He said my heart was my greatest strength and my greatest weakness. Does that make sense?"

            "Yes." Kishuku nodded. "If your heart is your greatest strength it means that you're full of love and compassion and all that for other people. But that can be used against you as well. If you love something too much, you can't bear to loose it. Your heart would be torn apart by losing anything you loved because you love it so much. You see?"

            "That…makes sense." I smiled at him. "What about you? Do you have anything on your mind?"

            "Oh the usual." Kishuku seemed to be very occupied with the reins. "Nothing big."

            "Nothing at all?" I noticed that it was getting darker a lot quicker then expected and we were at the base of Mt. Reikaku. Saihitei had explained yesterday in the long carriage ride that Mt. Reikaku was the beginning of a pass through the mountains and that's why the bandits used it. The people passing by were easy targets. We began on the trail.

            "Well…nah…" Kishuku scrunched up his nose.

            "Are you hiding something?" I asked in a teasing tone.

            "Well…yeah." Kishuku admitted. "It's about Miaka. I—"

            Kishuku was cut short because he closed his mouth and looked around quite suddenly. I had no idea why and was looking too when he grabbed my arm.

            "Kourin, get in the carriage, protect Miaka." Kishuku ordered me in a serious tone that I didn't question. Kishuku stopped the carriage and I got into the carriage with Saihitei and Miaka.

            "I think something's wrong." I told the others. There was a sharp crack and the carriage all of a sudden tipped. One of the wheels had been taken out. It fell off the road and I made sure Miaka was okay. Saihitei looked a little disorientated but seemed fine. "Kishuku?" I yelled questioningly.

            "You two make sure Miaka is okay!" Kishuku yelled. "They're here."

            "The Mt. Reikaku bandits!" Miaka exclaimed in horror. "Kishuku! You can't fight them by yourself!"

            "I'll help him." I opened the carriage door. "I've got to—"

            You may be wondering why I was cut off. And I'll tell you why that is.

            I suddenly found myself slung over someone's shoulder and being carried at a somewhat amazing speed by someone who I couldn't see. I knew it wasn't any of the others however. I could just tell.

            "Put me down!" I yelled as the carriage disappeared from view.

            "No way, you're my ransom." The male voice told me.

            "I said, put. Me. DOWN!" And I grabbed the person around the waist and threw them in an amazing twist of my body into the side of the mountain. What followed was a stream of curses.

            "Dammit! This is why I fucking hate women!" The voice seemed to be picking themselves up. I went into one of the defensive positions Kishuku had shown me. "Why can't you just be normal and fucking cry or something and be all helpless?"

            "Women aren't helpless!" I stomped my foot indignantly. "Who do you think you are?!"

            "I'm the leader of the Mt. Reikaku bandits." The gruff voice told me as it stepped into the failing light of the sunset. Fiery orange hair and bright eyes were towering over me menacingly.

            Oh.

            "Well I'm one of the Suzaku no seishi." I countered hotly, not losing face for a moment.

            "And one crazy fucking woman." The orange-haired bandit leader told me.

            "I'm not crazy!" I wasn't so sure I liked this guy. "Your stupid bandits are attacking the carriage! I've got to get back!"

            "A Suzaku no seishi huh?" The orange-haired bandit leader seemed to be thinking this over. "You'll be worth a lot of money, right?"

            "Idiot!" I punched him and he flew right back into the side of the mountain.

            "Stop fucking doing that!" He protested loudly. "It's not like I can do anything about it! Eiken overthrew me and now I'm the well, fuck, the exiled leader."

            "Great." I threw up my hands. "Just great! I didn't even get captured by the real leader. Just some loony."

            "I'm not a loony! You can ask anyone, they'll tell you that Genrou was the best leader they ever had." The orange-haired young man looked rather proud. A stick cracked and Genrou suddenly jumped me, pushing me to the ground. "Shut the hell up, they might hear us."

            "Get the hell off me." I shoved him off and into a tree.

            "Hello?" A voice called into the falling darkness. "Who is it? It's Genrou's buddy Kouji, here to see what he's up to! Oh, well thank you for coming."

            What…the…hell?

            "Kouji!" Genrou jumped up and ran to a man who had just appeared who had blue hair and a scar gracing his features. I watched the two link arms and start dance in a little circle.

            Omigod.

            I've been captured by a couple of weirdo bandits.

            What kind of seishi am I?

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            YAH! I love Tasuki! And him and Kouji are great. The Kouji dance is fun. Poor Tasuki, he always gets beat up. ^_^. So please review! And I bet you're all worried about Saihitei, Kishuku, and Miaka as well! All will be revealed! Next time!