Jack stoked the fire and started the soup heating, then headed to tell Kate that dinner would be ready soon. The sight that greeted him when he reached the mouth of the cave stopped him dead in his tracks.
Kate was sobbing with abandon into Rose's arms while Rose rocked her, whispering soft words that Jack couldn't make out. He stood there for a moment, taking in the scene.
He'd never seen her like this. He'd seen her upset before, seen her cry even, but he'd never seen her reach out like this and accept support and comfort. For a moment, he felt a surge of pain and disappointment. He wanted to be the one she turned to, the one to hold her.
He pushed back those feelings, realizing that this was what he had hoped for, exactly what she needed. It didn't matter who she opened up to, what mattered was that she opened up to someone. He watched for moment longer and then turned, heading back into the cave. Dinner could wait.
Not long after, Jack looked up to see Kate entering the cave. He studied her closely. Her eyes were slightly puffy, perhaps, but if he hadn't known she'd been crying a few minutes ago, he probably wouldn't have guessed. She'd gotten herself under control quickly.
"How are you doing Kate?"
She smiled slightly at his concern. "I'll be fine Jack," she said, heading towards him and sitting down by the fire.
"Kate, I know you'll be fine. What I'm asking is how you are right now."
Kate sighed. "Right now, I think I'm doing okay".
He looked at her, as if not completely convinced.
"Really, Jack. At this moment, I feel okay. I can't make any guarantees for later, but for now, I'd say the risk of a major meltdown is pretty low."
"Fair enough", Jack laughed, glad to see her sense of humor returning.
"So," she said, eyeing the pot bubbling over the fire, "Rose brought us some soup?"
"Yeah, she did. You up for some?"
Kate nodded. "It smells good. I'm actually pretty hungry", she said, sounding surprised.
"I'm not surprised. It's been quite a while since you've had anything substantial", he said, scooping some out for her.
"Here you go", he said as he handed her a steaming bowl. "Dig in".
They ate in companionable silence, enjoying the meal. Jack finished his bowl and noticed Kate's was nearly empty as well.
"Good stuff, huh?"
Kate looked up and nodded.
After refilling his own bowl Jack asked, "How about a refill?"
Kate considered for moment a nodded, handing Jack her bowl. "Okay, but just a little".
When hey had both finished their second helping, Jack put aside their bowls and handed her the antibiotics and some water.
"Do you mind if I check you over real quick?" he asked after she'd downed the pills.
"Kate," he said, sitting down beside her, "I think you're well on you're way to recovery".
Kate smiled hopefully, "Does that mean I can go back to the beach?"
Jack frowned. "I'd feel better if you'd let me keep an eye on you for a little longer."
Kate nodded, clearly disappointed.
"Hey" he said, meeting her eyes, "I know it's no fun being stuck in a cave all the time, but I just want to be absolutely sure you're okay, and I don't want you doing too much too soon."
She rolled her eyes.
"Come on Kate, I know you. As soon as you're out of my sight you'll be off climbing trees and blazing trails and who knows what else. You're going to have to take it slow. It'll be a while yet until you're back to 100 percent. Do you understand?"
"I guess" Kate said sadly, looking down at her feet.
He couldn't stand to see her so unhappy. He reached for her chin, tilting her face, looking into her eyes.
"Kate, it isn't forever".
She nodded, but didn't look convinced.
Jack sighed, "Tell you what. How about we take a little hike tomorrow morning, if you feeling up to it, and see how you do?"
She looked at him thoughtfully and nodded. "I'd like that".
Kate hadn't been tired, so Jack had suggested a game of cards. As it turned out, Kate was quite a card player, and Jack was glad they hadn't been playing for money.
He dealt another hand and looked up when she made no move to pick up her cards.
"Is something on your mind, Kate?" he asked, putting down his cards.
She looked at him and nodded. "Jack, I . . ." she paused and shook her head.
"What is it, Kate? Did you want to ask me something?"
She nodded again and took a long breath before speaking.
"I was just wondering if . . . well, do you think that if I had told you . . . if I had come to you right away and told you about the baby that this . . . this might not have happened?"
"Kate, oh Kate", he sighed shaking his head sadly. Clearly this was something that had been on her mind for some time. He should have realized it would be; should have discussed it with her sooner.
She looked at him, confused.
"The answer is no, Kate. I don't think it would have made any difference at all. It wasn't anything that you did or didn't do. It would have happened even if you'd been at home and had perfect prenatal care, although it would have been a lot less dangerous for you."
"Are you sure?" she asked, her voice breaking.
Jack reached for her hand, giving it a firm squeeze. "I'm pretty sure, Kate. It isn't your fault. You have to know that. I'm sorry I didn't make this more clear to you earlier. I should have known you'd wonder."
Kate sniffled and squeezed his hand back. "It's okay Jack. Thanks for telling me now. It helps to know, I guess."
They sat in silence for a moment, each thinking. Jack was the first to break the silence.
"Can I ask you something?"
Kate shrugged, "yeah, I guess".
"Why didn't you tell anyone about the baby? Why did you feel you had to keep it a secret? It's not as if a baby is such a horrible thing."
"It was for me, Jack."
"You don't want children?"
"God, not like this. Believe it or not" she laughed, "not so long ago I had a pretty normal life; I guess I wanted kids someday, but recently . . ." she shook her head sadly. "Jack, my life has been one disaster after another." She paused, but he urged her to continue.
"This, and the plane crash,they've just been the icing on an already really big cake. I can't even recognize my life. It all fell apart so quickly. I never could have imagined I'd end up where I am. And I don't just mean on this island". She looked at him, at a loss for words.
"I know what you mean, Kate".
"What about you?" she asked. "Do you want children someday?"
"I don't know" Jack admitted. "I think it would be nice someday, with the right person and the right circumstances."
Kate nodded. "That's just it. It wasn't the right circumstances for me, and it wasn't the right . . . It just wasn't right".
"Kate?" Jack asked cautiously, "Who is it? Who's the father?"
She stared at him, but remained silent.
"Is it someone on this island?
She didn't answer.
"I'm sorry. You don't have to tell me. It's none of my business. I just. . ."
"It's okay, Jack. It's just that . . . well, he's dead."
"Dead?"
Kate nodded. Jack thought for a moment. Suddenly, he remembered that day by the waterfall, when they'd just opened the case.
"It belonged to the man I loved.
It belonged to the man I killed."
"You killed him?" Jack asked hesitantly, trying not to sound accusatory.
Kate shook her head sadly and looked straight into his eyes. "No, Jack. You did."