Title: I Have to Say I Love You in a Spell
Author: Along Came the Spider
Summary: Remus has something to say

Part Two: Cold Comfort is Found in a Lonely Room

There was a tentative knock on the door, which jolted Sirius out of the book he was staring at. He stood up shakily. 'And no wonder,' he thought looking at the clock. 'I haven't moved in three hours.'

He walked over to the door and wrenched it open.

"Sirius?" Peter squeaked. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," Sirius croaked. He coughed to clear his throat and tried again. "Yes, I'm fine."

"Okay," Peter didn't look convinced. "Well, can I come in?"

Sirius blinked at his friend, then moved aside. "I guess so."

Peter walked into the room and looked around. "You've moved the furniture since last time."

"Sorry I haven't invited you over more," Sirius muttered.

"Do you happen to have beer or something?" Peter asked hopefully. "I am not sure I can get through this without something fortifying."

Sirius looked at his friend more closely. Peter's hair wasn't in place as it usually was, his face was drawn and his eyes were haunted. He looked like a man who had seen the edge of Hell and wanted very much to forget it. "Peter," he said softly. "What happened?"

Peter glanced around nervously. "I really need a drink."

Sirius walked slowly to the kitchen despite the desperation that Peter exhibited. He was unsure of how to deal with panicked friends. Remus was always the best one when it came to calming any of the others down. Sirius tried to remember the techniques that had always worked for Remus when Peter was frantically running around the dorm room upset about something.

'Screw this.' Sirius thought as he grabbed a couple of beers out of his fridge. 'I can't be Remus, which means Peter will get the Sirius style therapy. As much alcohol as he can tolerate before he becomes so drunk he passes out.'

Sirius quickly returned to the living room, surprising the hell out of his guest. Peter had been looking at the valuables that Sirius had inherited from his uncle, his leap away from the case was somewhat disturbing, though Sirius was to tired to think why.

"Alcohol as requested," he handed over one of the bottles. He waited as Peter took a long drag from the bottles. "So, what happened?"

"I..." Peter began to look around furtively. "Where have you been?"

Sirius blinked again. "What?"

"I called here about a week ago and you weren't here," Peter explained. "I waited for a while before leaving, and you never showed up."

"I stayed with James for a while," Sirius shrugged. "You could have come over if you were really in trouble."

Peter looked into his bottle and said nothing.

"Peter?" Sirius sat down and motioned to the chair next to his. Peter sat down tentatively looking like he wanted to bolt. "What is going on?"

"I don't know..." Peter refused to meet Sirius's eyes. "I just have a really bad feeling."

"For over a week now?" Sirius asked slowly. "Why didn't you go to James's house, or to Remus, if it was such a bad feeling."

"Have you talked to Remus lately?" Peter asked of his bottle before downing the rest of its contents.

"No," Sirius admitted. "Only at order meetings and he tends to run off before we can get over to him."

"Yeah," Peter mumbled. "I've noticed that tendency of his too." Sirius handed him the second beer silently. "Do you remember what Snape said at the last order meeting?"

Sirius snorted. "I tend to ignore Snape on a general basis. I don't believe that the man is working for us, I think he is the worst kind of scum there is."

A weird emotion crossed Peter's face, but it was gone too quickly for Sirius to identify. "I agree." He stated. "I can't imagine why Dumbledore believes the prat."

Sirius's brow creased at the vehemence in Peter's voice--the other man wasn't known for his passionate declarations. He had often retreated to the background of their little group, and was known primarily as James's friend. "I remember James saying after the last meeting that it was spooky to think that one of the order wasn't completely loyal." Peter started a little but regained his composure. "Is that what Snape spoke on?"

"He said that Voldemort has a spy within our ranks, one that he hasn't divulged to the common group yet." Peter was taking his second bottle of beer a lot slower than the last one.

"The most obvious answer to that is that Snivellus himself is the spy." Sirius snorted. "By sowing distrust in our ranks he is making his position secure."

"That is what I thought at first as well." Peter set the bottle down on the coffee table. "But the more I thought of it, the more I came to realize that he may be telling the truth."

"That will be a first."

"Hear me out," Peter said throwing up a hand. "In recent months we've all been drifting apart. Some of it is due to things like logistics, I live at home with mum, the rest of you all have your own places and James no longer has time, because he is married."

"True," Sirius allowed, "but who are you then suggesting as our spy."

"Think about it," Peter shrugged. "You've already said that you've noticed some things. Just take it a step farther; we do have a friend for whom the Ministry has made it nearly impossible to get a job. Wouldn't that make him more likely to join a group that publicly opposes the Ministry."

Rage ran through Sirius...Peter couldn't be suggesting...it was a stupid idea. "Not Remus!"

Peter blenched, "I'm sorry to be the one to tell you Sirius."

"No!" Sirius stood up and glared down at his friend with the same glare he had seen his mother use time and again. "I refuse to believe this."

"Siri..." Peter trailed off as he was hauled to his feet and slammed against the wall.

"What!" Sirius demanded. "What is your proof that Remus is this new spy! What are you basing these accusations on! It had better not be Snivellus or he will never see the light of day again!"

"It wasn't Snape!" protested Peter. "I was just thinking. That is why I wanted to talk to you."

Sirius let Peter fall to the floor slowly. "Well it isn't Remus."

"Fine," Peter gasped. "But if I may ask, how do you know?"

"I just do." Sirius sneered.

The two friends looked at each other, Sirius felt his anger at the other man fade slightly as he pulled himself together.

"I'm sorry." He said quietly. "Are you staying here tonight?"

"I'd better," Peter said as he took another drink of his beer. "My mother wouldn't like it if I came home drunk."

"Pete," Sirius looked at his friend. "Unless you've gained an extremely low tolerance over the past month you aren't drunk."

"I've still had alcohol, that means my mother will get upset." Peter shrugged.

"Mothers," Sirius sighed. "One reason, out of many, that I am glad I was disowned."

"The old bat is okay," Peter said. "I just don't like her controlling ways."

"Hmmm..." Sirius said in agreement. "You know where the guest room is right?"

Sirius barely heard Peter's affirmative grunt, before he headed off to his room. He was tired and Peter had raised some interesting questions.

The apartment was empty when Sirius woke up the next morning. Peter had left a note saying that he was going to work, and would call on Sirius again later in the week. Also in the kitchen was a slightly disgruntled owl who was impatiently hopping from chair to chair.

"What do you have there?" Sirius pulled the letter off the owls leg. The owl immediately took off flying away as fast as it could. Sirius turned the letter over and instantly recognized his own handwriting. Another letter sent to Remus had been returned. Sirius wondered briefly if Lily was having the same trouble he was in contacting their friend. If she wasn't, then Remus was obviously upset with something he had done, in which case Lily could help them fix this. If she was willing too. 'Of course whatever it was might be so bad, like the event in fifth year, and Lily won't want to help us reconcile.'

Sirius thought about this for a moment, he hadn't done anything. Therefore Lily, if she was in contact with Remus, would be more than willing to help him.

A quick firecall to the Potter's proved that Lily hadn't heard anything from their friendly werewolf either. 'What is he up too?' Sirius thought furiously. 'He'd better not be going back into that funk where we all hate him because he is evil.

Peter's words from last night came back to Sirius as he lowered himself into a chair. Remus was drawing more and more away from the group and there was nothing Sirius seemed to be able to do to stop it. Albus might be able to...

Sirius sat straight up. Maybe that was it. Voldemort might have another spy within the ranks of the order, or maybe the order had another spy within the ranks of the Death Eaters. Remus joining up to spy on the opposite side seemed a lot more likely than Remus joining up with a sadistic killer. Of course Peter, being slightly gullible, would immediately pick up on the darker undertones in Snape's little speech.

'That has to be it.'

If one had seen the figure currently coming out of Ollivander's in Diagon Alley, they would have thought it odd. The figure was wearing tattered robes, and had an underfed look that didn't go with the expensive rates that Ollivander's was known to charge. Sirius, however, was more than happy to see that figure and hurried over before the wizard could get away.

"Remus," he called as he neared him.

Remus Lupin started but turned slowly in the direction of his friend. "Sirius," he said hoarsely.

"Boy am I glad to see you," Sirius smiled. "I thought you had disappeared or something. All my owls have been returned unopened."

"I've moved," Remus said shortly.

"What is your new address?" Sirius asked.

"Mr. Black," Remus broke off as a coughing fit over took him.

"Remus?" Sirius put a hand on his friend's arm, only to have the arm yanked away.

"Sirius," Remus said when he regained his composure. "I don't have time to talk at this moment. I need to get to work."

"Remus," Sirius said quietly.

"No," the other man said. "I need to go."

He walked quickly away, stumbling only a little before aparating away.

Sirius woke up with a start. A voice cursing outside of his room told him that Peter was still there. He could still feel the heat of Remus's arm beneath his hand, though now he was awake he knew that he hadn't seen Remus in months.

Sirius changed into a dog and padded into his living room. The smell of Peter and booze came at him from all angles. Under Peter's smell was the stench of fear, a bitter smell that Sirius had come to know all too well in the past few months.

Another noise brought Sirius's attention to the kitchen, he moved there more out of restlessness than out of any desire to talk to Peter. Peter was bending over the kitchen table scribbling a note. The scrape of Sirius's claws on the kitchen floor brought his head up.

"Morning Sirius," Peter smiled. "I was just heading out to work."

Sirius shifted back to human form. "Have fun."

Peter snorted. "As much as I can, I'll call on you sometime next week."

Sirius watched Peter leave his apartment with a sense of disquiet. Sirius picked up the note left on the table. It was the same note that Sirius had read in his dream.

'What does that mean?' He asked as he got his breakfast ready. 'And does it mean that the next time I go into Diagon Alley I'll see Remus?'

Sirius thought about this, divination hadn't been one of the classes he had taken at Hogwarts. He had always thought it a load of crock, how could one tell anything through a dream? Now though, he was beginning to be a believer.

End Notes:

Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter.