Sheppard dived through the gate as the Wraith dart fired; twisting as he fell to protect his injured arm. The whine of the dart cut off abruptly as the shield closed behind him; followed almost immediately by the sound of impact as the dart slammed through the gate and into the shield.
The warmth of the Gateroom struck him as he rolled onto his back and glanced around, anxiously checking that the rest of his team had arrived safely. Ford was still facing the gate, P90 at the ready and a small knot of scientists including Grodin and a remarkably dishevelled McKay stood over a prone figure in a charcoal jacket; but whether it was Zelenka or Markham, he couldn't see from his position. Groaning, Sheppard sat upright and tried to climb to his feet beckoning Ford to help him. A medical team led by Dr Beckett ran into view and, with a practiced ease, Beckett checked the fallen figure and started issuing instructions to his staff. With his ears still ringing from the blow to his head, John was aware that something didn't sound quite right, but, as he passed into unconsciousness, the significance eluded him.
Zelenka opened the door. He stood with a small, intricate device in one hand and a look of surprise on his face.
"Major Sheppard? What can I do for you?"
"What you can do for me, Radek, is tell me exactly what is going on around here!"
Sheppard stepped past the stunned scientist and into the room. Zelenka glanced left and right along the corridor as if expecting to see others in on the joke, before turning back into his room with a frown. He watched, astonished, as Sheppard helped himself to a glass of Zelenka's private - and, so he had believed, secret - supply of moonshine, then threw himself into a large, comfortable armchair, without spilling a drop.
"Major Sheppard?"
"What's with the 'Major', Radek?" Sheppard emptied half the glass at a gulp, turning to stare at the confused Czech, who still stood by the door, pushing his glasses straight with the back of his hand.
"Er…'John', if you prefer?" Zelenka began to wonder if this was the first glass of moonshine that the Major had consumed this evening, or if Dr Beckett had missed something significant about Sheppard's obvious head wound.
"I mean that Beckett called me 'Major' earlier. And, correct me if I'm wrong here, but until this evening, hasn't Dr Beckett always been English?" An almost haunted look in Sheppard's eyes alerted the scientist to the fact that, despite the flippant tone, he was talking to a man close to panic.
"Ma…John, I'll just call Dr Beckett and we can sort this out together, yes?"
"No! I don't want to see Beckett." Sheppard leapt to his feet, and took a pace towards Zelenka.
Zelenka took an involuntary step backwards; for the first time ever physically intimidated by the larger man.
"OK, no problem, we don't do that." Zelenka sidestepped around the room, unconsciously keeping large items of furniture between himself and his strange visitor. "But shall I at least contact Dr McKay? Maybe he can help." Help calm you down, Zelenka thought, or at least keep you occupied while I get more practical assistance.
"Yeah, well, for a good meal and a pleasant evening's company, Rodney would be my first choice, but this is urgent, so I came to you."
Zelenka blinked, amazed at this feature of McKay's relationship with the Major. Something that he was previously totally unaware of.
"Er, it is very…um…confusing…of you to say that, Major, but thank you." Zelenka surreptitiously backed towards the low, cluttered table which held, among other things, his two-way radio.
"Again with the 'Major' Radek. As far as I am aware, I am still a Colonel in the United States Air Force. At least, I was when we gated to M3H - 136 earlier today, but since we came back not a damn thing is making any sense!"
"Souhlasim!¹" Zelenka muttered under his breath as he glanced over his shoulder at the radio, so close behind him.
"I'm glad to hear it."
Zelenka's head snapped round. "You speak Czech?"
"Ne, moje čeština je na nic,² as you delight in telling me."
Intrigued, Zelenka's shoulders relaxed slightly. Maybe the Major wasn't drunk or concussed. Maybe there was something weird going on. However, his hand still sought the radio behind his back.
"Can you prove any of this?"
"Prove any of what? Everything is wrong, but you can't see it."
Zelenka slowly picked up the radio and brought it round in front of himself. "OK, 'vic hlav vic vi.³' I'm calling Rodney or Dr Beckett. Which would you prefer?"
"Not Beckett." Sheppard tossed back the remaining moonshine then carefully placed the glass on Zelenka's table, forcing himself to appear calm now that the scientist had finally started taking the situation seriously. "But if you think that Rodney won't get fazed by this, then call him."
Ignoring the odd turn of phrase, the doctor thankfully called McKay.
"Rodney? Dr Zelenka here. Can you come over to my quarters straight away please? There is problem." A quick, nervous smile flashed at Sheppard.
"If it's that scanner you were working on, it'll have to wait. I'm down in the infirmary with Dr Beckett. Major Sheppard is missing and, according to his latest scans, he is not who he appears to be. Sergeant Bates has teams out now."
"Ah yes, that is what I want to see you about."
Souhlasim ¹ – I agree
Ne, moje čeština je na nic ² – No, my Czech sucks.
'vic hlav vic vi ³ - 'more heads know more' – two heads are better than one