I loaded one bullet into the gun. One is all I needed for this task. Though it required barely any effort, it took all the bravey I needed. It was time. I almost couldn't do it, but I had to. I had to take my own life. If I didn't, Dark Janovah would kill them all...I was alone. This was good, I didn't want them to see it. Dark Janovah cannot survive without me, and I without it. I was in my bedroom on the airbase. Alone. The gun was ready. I held it to my head. The cold metal skimmed my hair. But then something happened I didn't intend.

Torn: JANOVAH!!

Being the dumbass I was, I forgot to shut the door. I was sitting on my bed, and I didn't bother turning around.

Torn: Stop!! Don't!! There's other ways!!

Nobody was going to stop me from doing this. Esspecially not Torn.

Flashback

I was in a room with Torn, planning the next battle. It was a command room, similar to the Freedom HQ room. The was map being projected. Dark Makers were attacking Franerik.

Torn: It will be tough to pull them out of this. Even their army can't handle it.
Janovah: We can hit them. We have deathbots, and well-trained soldiers.
Torn: Janovah...

He had a look of frustration.

Torn: We can't keep doing this.
Janovah: We can get the manpower, and the resources.
Torn: No, not that. Us.

He was breaking up with me.

Torn: I mean, we always end up seperated, and we're all going to die anyway. What kind of a relationship is this?
Janovah: What? I thought we were hanging on by knowing one thing; that no matter what, we would be brought together one day.
Torn: It does not do to live on false hope.
Janovah: Please...you can't leave me alone. I don't want to throw all that away.
Torn: I'm sorry, but I do.

And in about one instant my whole life came crashing down. I didn't understand. I didn't want to. He pulled something out of his pocket. My seal.

Torn: I think this belongs to you.
Janovah: It was a gift.

My eyes filled with tears.

Janovah: Keep it.
Torn: Please don't cry...It's not worth crying over.
Janovah: Not worth crying over? You're DUMPING me!!
Torn: Please, just go.

I just stood there, dumbfounded. I cried, tear droplets rolling down my face.

Torn: WHAT ARE YOU?! DEAF? GO!!

That was more than I could handle. I ran to my room. The edge in his voice, the hostility I had felt. He just shut me out. Threw me away.

returns to present scene

Janovah: Shut the door.
Torn: Janovah...
Janovah: Shut..the...damn...door!!

Torn obeyed. I could sense fear.

Janovah: I'm going to give myself a count.

There was silence, and the air was rank with malevolence and uncertainty.

Janovah: One....Two....

I squeezed the trigger, ready to pull.

Janovah: Thre-

But I didn't get to finish my count, because I felt a hand pull be backwards on the bed. Torn was trying to take the gun from me. I tried to shoot it before he could take it from me, but when I discharged it, it had swung from my head to pointed at a wall and cracked it. We pulled on the gun.

Torn: Give me the gun!
Janovah: No!
Torn: You have people who love you!
Janovah: Yeah, like YOU loved me!
Torn: I DO love you!
Janovah: Then why did you leave me?
Torn: Just give me the gun!

I wasn't going to give up. But then, he did something I didn't anticipate. He leaned over my face, and with the utmost discretion, he kissed me, on the mouth. He had been on top of me, wrestling for the gun. But now my grip had weakened on the gun. A strange feeling surged through my body. I finally released my grip on the gun, lost in the strange aura. He tossed the gun across the room, his mouth still on mine. Finally he parted the caress and moved down to my throat, and he made love to me....

---------------------------------------- -------------------------------

I lay awake on my bed, still trying register what happened. It was the next morning, I lay on my back, staring at the door. I was alone. What baffled me is that before I was fearful of the act and now I wasn't, yet back then Rin was dead and now he's back. And anyway, does this mean we were back together? Bullets littered the floor. The gun lay on the floor, abandoned. I dared not it up....