Disclaimer: I don't own Avatar: The Last Airbender I'm just putting in my two cents
Wandering Thoughts
I've been thinking about him recently. Of course I would never admit this to Sokka or Aang; but . . . for some reason . . . I have. When none of us are talking while on Appa or when I can't fall asleep at night, I begin to think of him.
Usually during those times I think of my mother, and I would wonder what she would think of me if she knew all the different things I've been doing. I would wonder what advice she would give me, and I would imagine her holding me in her arms while gently stroking my hair and telling me that no matter what everything is going to turn out alright, like she used to do.
But then my thoughts would stray to him. He offered to give my necklace back; my precious necklace my mother gave me. Maybe that's why my thoughts continue to sway his way. Thinking back on the whole incident that was the first time I truly spoke to him. But then again, can you really call it speaking? After all I was tied to a tree . . . I suppose I can, and I suppose I can't I'm not quite sure, and it's thoughts like these that keep my mind on him.
I have always thought that he was evil. I never questioned his reasons on why he wanted to capture Aang, all I knew was that Aang was my friend I had to look out for him; protect him from this evil - much like the way my mother protected me. And although I still think he's evil for wanting to capture Aang I'm starting to question; why does he want him so? I once heard a rumor, while in town, that he was banished from his own land. I don't understand this. If that's true then why can he control his little Fire Nation Army? And if he's no longer apart of the Fire Nation then, again, I must ask myself why does he want to capture Aang?
Will Aang really give back whatever he lost? He said he lost his honor, I don't understand how. Capturing the Avatar and destroying the last chance to save the world would be more dishonorable in my opinion; I don't understand how capturing Aang will give him back the honor he lost.
Thinking back . . . to when he was trying to talk to me, or . . . was it when he was trying to interrogate me, I am no longer sure . . . I remember a look in his eye. Yes, I was trying to look away but since I was tied to a tree no matter how I turned my head I could see him, from the corner of my eye. He looked sad, he looked regretful, he looked . . . human. Well, he is a human being, but then again you don't really think of an evil person to have any human characteristics to them. He offered to let Sokka and me go; all I had to do was tell him where Aang was. I didn't really think about it at the time, but that was human too - offering to let us go free rather than taking us as prisoners. But of course I wouldn't, again, that would harm Aang and I need to protect him.
Come to think about the subject of being a prisoner, why didn't he throw me in their ship? I'm sure they would have one prison cell there. Why keep me out in the open where I have a chance of escaping rather than in a prison cell deep in a ship where I have less of a chance to escape? Was it to bait Aang out? Or was it because he really didn't want me as a prisoner, he really wanted to leave me alone except for the fact that I had useful information. Erg! These thoughts are driving me mad!
Maybe I don't have a good judgment of character. I thought Jet was good, but in reality he was truly evil. And I always assumed he was evil when in fact he has some qualities that suggest that he might be good. Probably a little misguided . . . but good none-the-less.
No, it's not my sense of judgment, after all when I first met Aang I thought he was good in heart and that was correct; it's my lack of judgment on everyone but firebenders. I naturally assume people are good, unless they're a firebender. I did the same with him. Assume the worst. But he was threatening my village! Well . . . Actually it's more like he was asking where Aang was, he didn't actually harm anyone, except for Sokka, but that's because Sokkastartedthe fight. And come to think of it, as soon as he had Aang he left us in peace, I know other Fire Nation Commanders wouldn't have been so courteous, others would've ransacked the village. Again maybe that's a quality that's often missed when looking at him. I missed it as well . . . I don't think I would've even given it a second thought if it wasn't for my necklace - for my mother.
My mother has always guided me, even after her death. There were times in the South Pole when my necklace would fall off and I'd stop Sokka to make him go with me to get it, when a few moments later a seal would hit a iceburg too hard and all the snow that had acquired on it fell down in a mini avalanche where we would've been. Not only that incident, but others; incidents I can't explain but ended up saving my life or helping me. She guides me to the right path – always. So now I must wonder . . . I must wonder if this is her doing, I must wonder if this is her will, her way of guiding me.
Right now I'm so confused on everything - people, choices, destiny. The only thing that makes both absolute and yet no sense at all is that I've been thinking about him recently.
End
A/N: Hello everyone, how are you guys? Well I hope. :D Well I don't know why but this fic sort-of came to me when I was supposed to be doing my homework. It's truly amazing when inspiration strikes sometimes. ;P
As you can tell it's Katara thoughts on Zuko. I thought it'd be interesting if we knew her thoughts since 'Waterbending Scroll'. Heh, as you can see it's full of conflict, but so is the human heart. (Animé sweat drop)
I used a lot of repetition, and tried to give her a voice of hesitation and show howt she was drawing out different conclusions based on her thought process, hopefully it worked. I also made sure she never said Zuko's name, don't quite know why – call it writer's instincts, but I think it adds something. ;D
Well I hope you enjoyed this fic. THANK YOU for reading it:D
