Well since mytwo reviewers asked me so nicely... Here's Chapter 2!

windgal: Thank you for the compliment, here it is as requested

The Squabbit :Another Thank you for the compliment, and the rest of the chapters shouldn't take to long to put up.

And since I begged the artist so very very much: Inuyasha, the characters/ideas therein, and all the wonderful tortures ahem> activities derived therefrom, have been delegated to me for the next apocalyptic event scheduled to occur when all of the planets in our solar system align with the north star and the sun.

On with the show!

Understanding

It hurt.

Gods, I'm confused.

I still can't believe what happened, it was so fast.

I remember what called me there, to that place in the woods. It was the scent of blood, her blood.

Sure I'd sensed the undead miko was in the forest, with a scent like that, who could miss it. I'd really thought nothing of it. No even when Kagome decided to go for a walk.

It was nothing unusual. She often liked to walk around. She said nature, being around nature, made her feel better. And having been to that go awful place she lived in, I could understand her quiet fondness for all things green. And she often took the runt with her. The kit loved the time she spent with him and she doted on him.

So again, I thought nothing of it. It was normal, routine. The thought that Kikyou would want to hurt anyone other than me never crossed my mind.

At least it didn't until I smelled Kagome's blood.

I never liked the smell of her blood. It always affected something deep inside of me. And I'm not talking about her monthly blood, that's different. This is fresh blood, the kind that only comes from a wound. And the scent of it always made me feel…like I'd failed. I swore to protect her and she was bleeding. It was a painful feeling, usually centered in my chest.

I of course raised the alert and ran towards the smell of Kagome's blood and grave dirt. My brain was set on high speed. Suddenly every memory of every encounter Kagome had ever had with Kikyou started running though my head. Bits of stolen conversation between the others about the events Kagome refused to tell me about flooded my ears. Oh God! Kikyou's gonna kill her! Kikyou's gonna kill my Kagome!

Why couldn't I have realized it before? Why couldn't I see it? Everyone else knew, they saw. That was why Shippou practically fought tooth and nail to make sure Kagome didn't walk alone.

I pressed myself for speed, straining to the limit. Kagome couldn't die.

I landed in the clearing with my sword drawn between the two women. Upon swift inspection, I found Shippou on the ground unconscious. It appeared he'd managed to save Kagome after all. From the looks of things, the little twerp had knocked Kagome away from where she had been enough to make the arrow miss her heart. I'd have to thank him when he woke up, Kikyou seldom ever missed.

I heard the twang of Kikyou's bowstring and instinctively turned to face her. I hadn't gotten the chance to check Kagome well enough for my taste and I snarled at the undead miko.

"So you choose the girl then, Inuyasha?" my first love asked. That look was in her eyes, the one I remember from so long ago. The one she'd had when she asked me to become human. Only this time I knew what it was for. She was trying to manipulate me.

I realized then that every time she'd turned that look on me since she'd been resurrected it had been to cause Kagome pain. This time I knew what she was doing and it disgusted me. I think the reason it didn't work this time is because Kagome's blood perfumed the air. And judging by the potency of the scent, Kagome wouldn't be standing much longer.

"Why?" I growled at her. Why Kagome? Why me? Why now? Why ever?

"Because she's in the way!" the undead miko screamed back at me. "Because she holds the rest of my soul! I want it back! It is mine! She should die and give it to me!"

I tensed. Kagome's death was to be nothing more than a convenience to the woman that caused her so much pain. I wouldn't allow it. If Kagome was going to die, it was going to be in her old age surrounded by her family and friends.

I gripped my sword tightly in my hands. Then she said something else.

"Get out of my way Inuyasha!" Kikyou screamed. "I will kill you first if I have to!"

I understood then. Even if I had allowed Kikyou to take me to hell, even if I agreed, she would still kill Kagome. And in that my death would mean nothing. It was decided then. I had sworn to protect them both, but if I had to protect one from the other, I would protect Kagome.

It was a good thing I'd already made that decision, because my friends started screaming with a renewed intensity. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Kagome appear from behind me.

She was magnificent. My Kagome glowed brightly with her power, the only darkness around her being over the wound Kikyou had caused.

Faster than anyone could blink, Kagome raised her glowing hand and shot her power at her attacker. Kikyou exploded. It was something you just had to see.

The clay shell fell apart and released all the stolen souls, including Kagome's, which shot straight for her. She screamed on impact, a horrible painful sound that I'll never forget. I never want to hear her make that sound again.

Just as the light began to die down, Kagome whirled around to look at me. And with Kikyou's voice and eyes she cried, " Why did you betray me, Inuyasha!"

I'd never thought I'd hear those words come from my Kagome. Hearing her say them cut me worse than anything ever had before. Looking into her face, staring at her eyes, I realized I had betrayed her. I betrayed Kagome. Every time I ran to Kikyou, every time I brushed away the hints of Kikyou being a danger to Kagome, every time I compared her unfavorably with her preincarnation, I betrayed Kagome.

And the knowledge of that hurt me worse than anything else she could've said. In that moment, I hated myself. Not because I was part human, not because I was part demon, not even because I was both, I hated myself because I had continually betrayed her trust. And what's worse, I accused her of doing something very similar with Kouga.

I didn't want to believe it, I didn't want to know that all the things I accused her of were the same things I'd been doing. I was disgusted with the person I saw myself as. How could Kagome have put up with me? What sort of saint goes though all that and still has the courage to trust me?

I'd been trading on her good will like some blood sucking leech all this time because I was too selfish to see the truth. And Kagome had nearly paid with her life.

I didn't want to face it. I couldn't. So I did what I normally did when life threw me a situation I didn't like. I ran.

I ran for days, trying not to think. I ran until I was exhausted and then I dreamt. I dreamed Kagome forgave me like she always did, and it scared me.

I know the others were searching for me, but I didn't want to be found. I didn't want them to see… how I thought I would look.

I carefully ran back to my forest. I was pretty sure they weren't looking for me there. It was comforting to be in familiar territory again, my territory.

I kept watch until I saw Sango and Miroku head out to search for me on Kirara. They were worried. I didn't blame them. Even Shippou had joined them.

One person was conspicuously missing, though. In all my running I had forgotten that Kagome had been wounded. Suddenly my head filled with thoughts of worry. How bad had it been? Surely using all that energy had worsened things somehow.

I thought back on the event again, trying to glean from the memories what I had failed to notice before. Kagome hadn't stepped up until after Kikyou threatened me. I blinked at the realization. She was protecting me, defending me. A new wave of guilt crashed over me. After all the times I had betrayed her, she still though I was worth the effort.

Then why the words, why the accusation? That wasn't like Kagome. That was more like Kikyou. Then I thought of something else.

Kagome had been weak from blood loss before her attack. She'd used up most of her strength in the blow to Kikyou. The piece of soul that had animated the clay doll had been strongly influenced by Kikyou and her hatred.Kagome's words were very likely a result of her struggle to cleanse and absorb that long lost piece of her soul.

Which meant that Kagome didn't hate me like I thought. And I'd left her there, weak and defenseless. Some protector, some friend I am. Poor Kagome.

She's probably talked herself into assuming all the blame on this one too. I'm no fool. I know her well enough to know she thinks everything that goes wrong is her fault. And I, like the bastard I am, helped resubstantiate that belief in her mind in the first weeks of our journey.

Gods I hate myself for that too. Every insecurity she has I helped cement into place. Some originate from me entirely. And she doesn't hate me for it.

I looked towards the village, to the hut I suspected they'd left her in. I watched Kaede leave to fulfill her duties as the village miko. I'm afraid to go there. Afraid that this time Kagome'll finally come to her senses and hate me for real.

…No, it was Kikyou who hated. Kagome was completely alien to the true concept of it. I don't think she hates Naraku. Dislikes him sure, but hate? More like she wants to see justice done.

It was the same with Sesshoumaru that first time. She went after him, not because I hated him or he insulted her, but because he'd used and destroyed Muonna. Because he'd plucked the pearl out of my and desecrated our father's grave.

Kagome was always fair with everyone. Everyone but herself.

My eyes refocus on the hut as this time Kagome exits. I look her over to check her health. She looks tired and determined. Her shirt is stained and worn, but I see nothing to worry about. She sets off for the woods. I figure she's headed for the well and home.

I watch her leaving the village and notice something seems off. I'm not sure what is exactly.

Before I can think to move, I find myself in front of the very hut Kagome just left. I step inside and allow my eyes to adjust slowly as I breathe in the left over wisps of her scent. She's been here for days, I can tell.

I notice something on the floor in front of me. It's my sword. I pick it up and hear the sound of clinking glass. I look down to see an all to familiar jar of Shikon no kakera and a note.

Unlike popular belief, I do know how to read, I'm just not very good at it. I'm slow at best. It's never bothered me before, but today it did.

Minna,

Gomen ne, for all the pain I've caused you. I never meant to be a burden.

Tell Shippou-chan that I will always love him and not to eat all the candy at once. If he can, ask him to remember me without tears.

Sango-chan, I'm sorry for all the horrible things that have happened to you. I love you like the sister I never had. I will miss you greatly.

Miroku-sama, try not to anger too may women. (It helps to keep your hands to yourself!) Despite all that, or maybe because of it, I will miss you as well.

Inuyasha…oh minna please tell him I'm sorry! I never meant to hurt him. I'm sorry about Kikyou.

I'm leaving for good this time. This way I can't cause any more pain. You won't have to rescue me anymore or worry about protecting me, because I'll be at home. I'll always remember all of you, no matter what. I believe in you! Remember that. If I can give you nothing else, remember that I believe in you always.

I'm leaving the Shikon no Kakera. Kouga has two more shards and Naraku has the rest. Ask Inuyasha not to kill Kouga, he doesn't deserve it. And when everything is over, give the tama to Inuyasha. He can use it to wish himself demon or to bring Kikyou back to life or whatever it is he wants it for.

Forever yours,

Higurashi Kagome

"No," I choked out. I was racing out the door and through the trees towards the well faster than I had ever run before. She was leaving. She was leaving because she thought her killing Kikyou had upset me. She was leaving because she thought I loved Kikyou.

"Oh gods, no!" I breathed as I entered the clearing just to see her slip though the well. Without pausing for thought, without slowing down I leapt for the well. I jumped in without hesitation and nothing happened. Nothing happened!

She was gone. This was the reward for all the pain I'd caused my Kagome. " No!" I cried, I didn't even notice the tears falling down my face. "Please no!" I was begging now, clawing at the sides and the bottom of the well. What was I without her? "No, Kagome," I coughed in the dust I'd kicked up with my frantic, desperate claws.

It was no use. I don't remember how long it was before I finally gave up and went back to the hut. Hopefully Kaede might be able to come up with something. And maybe Kagome had been kind enough to forget something. Something with her scent on it. I suddenly wanted her scent without the taint of my own tears marring it.

I ransacked the hut from top to bottom, not touching the note or Shippou's stack of candy. Kagome left it for him and I wouldn't go against that. I left the shards too. They only reminded me of the many times I'd hurt her by telling Kagome I only needed her for the shards. It was yet another reason she left. She thought I hated her and it made me hate myself more.

Somehow I lucked out and found Kagome's red tie to her uniform. It was saturated with her scent from resting in a strong scent area day after day. I curled around it in my hand like the life line it was.

They found me like that hours later. The hut a mess, Kagome's farewell on the floor and me curled up in a corner with the only forgotten piece of Kagome I could claim.