Chapter 16

Crisis

Gil stepped through the doors of the nearest drug store to the diner shortly after parting with Sara. He hadn't exactly known what he was doing, he felt almost as if his body were in automatic pilot while the rest of his mind were somewhere asleep in his head.

The drug store was quiet, a young girl was behind a counter flicking through a Cosmopolitan magazine out of boredom of lack of customers. Gil swallowed his pride, and marched over to the counter.

"Excuse me," he said to gather her attention, she looked at him, a little alarmed she hadn't heard him come in, and she put the magazine away quickly.

"Don't tell my boss," she said in a whisper, gesturing to the hidden magazine, "I'll get fired."

"It's fine," Gil assured, he gave her a nervous smile.

"How can I help?" she asked, she was in her early twenties, she had hair the colour of deep rust, eyes the shade of milky coffee, and freckles that made her appear somewhat younger than she obviously was. The nametag on her uniform spelt out 'Sue' fine black letters.

"Well, uh, Sue," he said, not really understanding why he'd needed to use her name at all, "I'm…well, just in querying about something…" he explained, he leaned on the counter, he kept his voice hushed in case any customers decided to walk in and overhear.

"Is this a medical problem?" Sue asked in a quiet hush.

"Oh, no, nothing like that…" Gil assured.

"You want to buy condoms?" Sue asked, "most guys always whisper at the counter when they come to buy condoms, but it's no big deal."

"No, its not that…" Gil tried to remain calm, "I'm really here for…" he looked around, "Well…it's kind of embarrassing really," he admitted.

"Oh?" Sue seemed intrigued, she leaned a little closer over the counter, straining to hear him speak so softly.

"How old do you think I am?" Gil asked in an absurd impulse he hadn't quite expected of himself at all.

Sue seemed taken aback, she tucked her rusty coloured hair away behind her ears, "uh…I dunno…"

"Go on, take a guess. I won't be offended."

"Fifty…?" Sue shrugged.

"Actually, yes," he answered, he felt his cheeks turning furious red, he felt truly humiliated. He wished she'd said forty. "I need…something that's going to…I dunno, take at least a few years off me."

"Ohhhh," Sue nodded, "I get you. Hairdye?"

"Would that work?"

"Sure," Sue nodded, she left the counter area, she gestured towards a shelve at the back of the store, "we have a wide selection, actually – there's brands that are just for men."

Gil grimaced, he didn't understand why he was doing this at all. Sara hadn't ever made any comment about his age, and so far the only person who really had was this Jeremy he'd met in the diner. But it was embarrassing. He wondered how many times he'd been outside with Sara and been assumed to be her father.

If anyone finds out about me and Sara…they'll call me her sugar daddy or something, or say she's looking for some kind of father figure, he thought.

"What was your natural hair colour?" Sue asked, she was scanning the shelve with a keen intent, she had the look of a woman on a mission.

"Uh...hard to say, it's been so long since I saw it," Gil joked nervously, he touched the gelled curls on the top of his head absently.

"Black?" she asked.

"Uh…yeah…" he said nervously and he strived to remember if that was true. He'd hardly paid attention to his hair through his life to notice. It was hair…he had it cut when it needed cut, he washed it when it needed washing, he wore a hat over it when it needed protecting from the dust, and he combed it when it needed combing, it had no other relevance in his life.

Now it was a nuisance. A pile of grey to remind him of every single year he'd been alive, and probably to remind everyone around him how much older than he was compared to Sara.

"Wouldn't going straight back to black though be a bit severe?" he asked.

"It would, I guess," Sue picked a box from the shelf, "this stuff washes in and washes out," she explained, "the longer you leave it in, the darker the colour will be. If you don't like the colour, you just give it some washes and it'll fade."

"How many washes?" Gil asked.

"About eighteen."

"I'll take it…" Gil replied rather quickly.

I must be crazy, he was silently thinking.

"You have a young face," Sue said as she led the way back to the counter, "y'know, if you shaved that beard off…" she trailed off, and left the thought unfinished as she rang the box of hair dye up on the cash register.

Gil touched his beard, he'd spent a while growing it, he wasn't sure if he could part with it just yet. But perhaps Sue was right. She herself was young, and surely her opinion was better than his own.

"Thank you, Sue," Gil said as he paid, "This has been…informative."

Sue just smiled, and watched as he left.

When Gil got into his car, he threw the box into the glove compartment with complete detest.

Why am I doing this, I can't go and dye my hair, I'm old, I can't escape from it. Dyeing my hair isn't going to miraculously turn back the hands of time, he thought. Is this a midlife crisis? Am I having a midlife crisis? I'm obviously having some kind of crisis here...after all, I never cared about my hair before.

He sighed and thought of Sara.

I didn't care until now, anyway…it's Sara. She's doing this to me.

Everything logical within him screamed that he should end the relationship with Sara now before he ended up changing everything in his life to accommodate her. That today it was only hair dye, tomorrow it could be a diet, and by next month it could be marriage.

He let his head rest on the steering wheel for several moments as he sat parked there, he tried to think straight. What would Catherine say? He wondered.

Gil could picture Catherine clearly in his mind, and could almost hear her words. She'd say something along the lines of 'take a chance, who cares what you have to do to keep her, just get your head up out of that microscope and do it before you lose her – or you'll end up spending the rest of your life wondering about it,'.

Gil started up the car, took a deep breath and decided that he'd do whatever he had to do. He couldn't go back to being alone again never knowing if he'd ever love. If dying his hair just so he could look younger to keep Sara's interest was necessary, then so be it.

Yes, I realise it's getting out of character now, but I can't help myself. The show has tortured us for so long with the "will they won't they" thing, that i cna't help but want to torture Gil's char just for him not having gotten together with Sara by now, lol.

Ah, anyway, it's kind of humourous. To me at least.