Chapter 51

Control

After the pizza was gone, the wine bottle drained, and the first movie had finished, the mood in the room was definitely somewhat lighter. Settled back against the couch, one arm around her, Gil's mind was relaxed and content once again. The embarrassment of bringing up the subject of her prescription earlier still bothered him, but for the best part he was able to shove it out of his mind whenever it came back to haunt him.

Right in that moment, having Sara curled up against him felt incredibly good, her arm draped over him, her head against his chest and her hair so near to his face that it was so easy to lean in and breathe in the smell of her rosehip shampoo whenever he wished. He'd become quite fond of that scent.

"Ever seen this movie before?" Sara asked.

The movie Gil had brought along was Red Dragon. He'd read the book twice back in his younger days, but had never seen the movie before. It had been something he'd been contemplating renting for a while now. "I read the book a couple of times. Didn't see the movie though."

"I saw the original movie…" Sara said, "I think it was called 'Manhunter'."

"Was that any good?" he asked.

"Actually, I'm beginning to think the original was better than this," Sara confessed, "it's still an okay movie but…I don't know, they say the original movies are far superior to the modern remakes. I kind of agree."

"The book is always better," Gil shrugged, he kissed her hair affectionately, and smiled as she curled closer to him.

It was as he looked down at her that he noticed the collar of her t-shirt had slightly been tugged to the side by the position she was leaning against him, so that it revealed her shoulder, and the strap of her bra. At first it didn't register, the room was dark save the flickering light of the TV screen. But it was that very light which caught the shiny fabric of the satin strap which made him realize what bra she was wearing.

Oh…my…god, he thought, his breath catching in his throat. He realised now why she'd taken so long in the bedroom while he'd been trying to get the cork out of the neck of the wine bottle. She'd changed into the bra. He wasn't sure what to think about this. Why would she do such a thing? Either she hadn't been wearing a bra at all when he'd come and she'd decided to put it on while she had a free moment…or…she'd done it deliberately.

And if she'd done it deliberately…

He exhaled a slow steady breath, staring at that strap, still fascinated, the images of her out of that T-shirt began to play in his mind. He felt the physical aches of need beginning to surface. He found himself trying to calculate the last time he'd actually made love with any woman and came up with a blank. Right now, concentrating just wasn't possible, not when she was leaning against him, not when she was wearing that particular bra. Not when her breast was pressed into his side…beneath that satin purple bra.

He just had to touch that bra, just as if to confirm that it really was there, that he just wasn't imagining it was that particular bra out of a strange obsession from seeing her wear it once before. Awkwardly, he put his hand at the top of her arm just beneath her shoulder, squeezing it affectionately, he kissed her hair again, his eyes never leaving that satiny purple strap which caught the light from the TV so wonderfully, making it almost shimmer. With his thumb, he deliberately brushed past the cottony material of her t-shirt to caress her bare shoulder, and the strap itself.

The ache came again, more powerful, and he hoped to god that the light from the TV might be playing shadows on him, he did not want her to see how aroused he was becoming, and he was beginning to realize it would soon become more than devastatingly obvious.

Sara shivered at his touch, trying to get comfortable she shifted her position a little, craning her head a little to the side, it falling just below Gil's view.

Gil swallowed, he remembered the taste of her skin, the texture, the way he'd felt her pulse throb beneath the flesh. He let his hand travel up her shoulder a little so that his thumb could brush the side of her neck. She shivered again under his caress.

"That tickles," she murmured, her eyes never leaving the television screen.

"Sorry, wasn't meant to," he slid his hand up her neck very lightly until he was cupping the left side of her jaw, he caressed her cheek with his thumb.

This caused Sara to lean up and turn to him, looking at him with a mild curiosity as if to ask what he thought he was doing, but there was nothing in her expression that seemed to object to his touching either.

Gil took this moment to kiss the right side of her jaw, he still kept his hand on the left side, as if to hold her in place should she try to move away. His lips traveled down her jaw to her neck. He heard her breathing in sharply at this, she had her hands against his chest, and she was slowly and steadily shifting so that she was kneeling on the couch beside him.

He parted his lips a little to suckle on the supple skin of her throat, his arms sliding around her slim waist, she let out the tiniest little "oh," in a soft moan that. Her breathing had quickened, he could hear it, and feel the excited rhythm of her pulse under that skin his lips and tongue were so fondly savoring.

Gil had to maneuver awkwardly to get her down on the couch, her head was ever so slightly hanging off the end where there were no arm rests, her neck dipped backwards giving him more access to her throat and collarbone, he kissed along every inch of her neck, he stifled a moan into her neck as he accidentally pushed too hard against her, the pleasure and pain he felt pressed beneath the confines of his jeans was strangely more vivid than he'd ever felt before.

He found her lips and kissed her deeply, in unison their mouths parting and tongues played a carnal tango, the taste of wine strong, lips moving in harmony. It was strange this time he did not feel as nervous as the first time, although this time was sure to go even further. There were no fire alarms here to disrupt them.

Gil tried to think ahead, although it was quite difficult to think at all when she was kissing him this way, her hands were now up his back beneath his shirt, she was making it quite difficult for him to think of anything else but those hands roaming his body.

Quick, think. What could possibly go wrong right now? He asked himself. Then it came to him. Work could call wanting me to come in to examine a body…Catherine could call asking where I put a file...

He reached into his pants pocket awkwardly trying to maintain his concentration on the kiss, he yanked out his cellular phone and held it close his face, he cracked one eye open whilst he continued to kiss Sara, so he could find the off button easily, he switched it off and tossed it to the floor in reckless abandon.

Sara heard the thud of the phone hit the floor, and pulled her lips from his, "what was that?" she asked breathless.

"My phone," he answered, and silenced her with more deep kisses. His hands found the hem of her t-shirt and he inched it up moment by moaning, letting his thumbs grace her stomach. He felt her twitch and buck her hips up in response to his ticklish touch. Her pressing against him felt more than wonderful, despite it reminded him of how completely uncomfortable it was for him in the jeans he'd chosen to wear.

The couch was becoming a nuisance too now, there was barely enough room to move on, and he was afraid that one wrong move might send him and Sara tumbling over the edge and thudding to the floor between the couch and the coffee table.

How far is this going to go? He wondered. Should I mention the bedroom? Should I just pick her up and take her there, or should I wait to see where she wants to take it before asking? Oh god, I don't know how much more of this I can take…

Gil finally broke the kiss, their breathing heavy, hearts beating rapidly, he kissed her neck again, fingers playing with the hem of her shirt, contemplating taking the thing off of her completely. His eyes glanced towards the television, he couldn't do this in front of the television, on this couch. He found himself wishing they were still in that hotel suite in Edinburgh, that had been a perfect romantic setting for such an intimate moment.

This isn't working, he thought. I can't do this here, not in front of the TV with Edward Norton and Ralph Fiennes on the screen…

It seemed far too perverse to go any further in front of a movie about a serial killer – however fitting it was that he and Sara were both criminalists.

Sara's lips were now on his neck. He had to resist the urge to moan. Every sense was heightened by the pinnacle of his arousal. She bit down softly, which left him with incontrollable shudders of pleasure and the slight tinge of pain, a combination which went together wonderfully.

Finally, he allowed himself to moan one word. The one word that had been playing on his mind for the last few minutes, "bedroom."

Sara stopped instantly, pushing him up a little so she could look at him, look into his eyes, her gaze questioning. She licked her lips a little then bit down on her bottom lip, her eyes searching his for some kind of answer to a question she hadn't asked. Finally, she murmured, "okay."

Getting up, and walking to the bedroom was far harder than Gil had thought it might be. He had the strange sense of walking to his doom, that this was definitely the point of no return, there was no turning back, there would be no interruptions. They were totally and utterly alone. And they would make love. No question in his mind about it anymore.

She walked backwards, guiding the way, holding his hands to lead him in, they shared three kisses on the way, Gil let go of her hand to switch the light on the wall off so that the room was plunged into an almost darkness, save whatever light might seep in from the streets outside.

Sara slipped off her t-shirt and discarded it, standing there looking at him, as if to wait for some kind of response.

Gil stood for one moment, examining her in the vague light that was left in the room. He could see her well enough to still make out the plunge of her cleavage and the shimmer of the satiny material.

He moved towards her, taking her in his arms to kiss her again, they stood kissing passionately for several moments before making it to the bed. He trailed kisses down her upper chest, and just above the plunge of her cleavage.

This is where we were the last time before the fire alarms went off, he thought, he ran his hands up her sides. He tentatively moved his hands up to her breasts, cupping the mounds, savoring the satiny fabric beneath his fingers. He was almost sent over the edge by this.

Control, keep control. You're no good to her if you lose it now, he told himself firmly in thought. He felt her removing his shirt. Something in him wanted to resist that, perhaps the fear that one single touch from her might be more than he could bear. He slid his hands beneath her back, trying to release her from the bra, and still struggling as much as he had done that first night in Edinburgh.

His shirt became discarded, her fingers trailed along his chest, he trembled, his breathing quickened more, heartbeat loud and furious within his chest now. Below his belt he was throbbing painfully, he couldn't take it anymore.

Her fingers danced down his stomach, his breath came out an uneven whisper, they went lower, to fumble with the buckle of his belt first, and then with the button of his jeans…and then the zipper.

Gil closed his eyes tightly, her hand skimmed his boxers, and he was so sure that if she went any further that it would all be over. He grabbed her wrists and pinned her down, he couldn't allow her to touch him just yet, his excitement was too close to the line bordering on climax.

He had her right where he wanted her, and she was unable to move an inch pinned there. She didn't seem jarred by this, in fact if anything, there was a hungry look in her eyes, which told him that being pinned down in such a way might have been one of her secret fantasies. He had to admit, pinning her this way was pretty close to one of his own.

He kissed her softly, tenderly, being slow and lingering with this, giving himself time to wind down his arousal enough that the slightest touch wasn't going to send him over the edge.

Finally, when he felt the tension ease in himself, he let go of her wrists, and slid his hands beneath her to try again with her bra. This time it unclasped easily, and just as he'd managed to remove it, he felt her touch him beneath is boxers. He moaned low in his throat as she did so. Her caresses made him feel as if his body were alive with electricity, he was tingling all over. Her touch awakened every little sense within him, every hair on his body seemed to stand to attention and feel the caress of cool air from the open window.

Gil breathed "go slow," near her ear softly, then he bent down to kiss her breasts,

his hands cupped the soft supple mounds. His thumbs brushed her sensitive nipples, he heard her moan throatily in response. He let his lips graze her left nipple, and her touch on him tightened in response.

Next he began unbuttoning her jeans, and when finally the button and zip were undone, he slowly slid them down her narrow hips, letting his thumbs brush against her thighs as he done so.

Sara's jeans were discarded, as well as his, and his underwear, which now he felt terribly exposed without. He moved up and kissed her again to keep her attention, he couldn't bear the thought of her looking at him naked just yet.

Her hand was working steadily and slowly along his length, and he was furiously trying to not let himself be overwhelmed, he'd spent years fantasizing about this moment, and he wasn't about to let the fantasy be his undoing.

His fingers danced down her flat stomach to over her underwear – they too, were Satin. He pressed his fingers to where she needed him to most, and she moaned into his mouth. The fabric was moist, and warm, alerting him to her arousal. He slid his fingers beneath the fabric to caress her more intimately, she squirmed slightly against his hand, incredibly stirred by his touch.

He ended the kiss, sucked softly on her bottom lip for a moment, then moved to whisper near her ear, "Sara…" he was breathless, his heart beating faster than ever, "I need..." he began, but he wasn't sure he could quite finish the sentence.

Sara nodded, "it's okay…" she whispered, she pecked his lips before leaning over to the cabinet on the right side of the bed to open a drawer and pull out the appropriate item he needed. As they kissed softly, she opened the packet to put it on him, never for a moment, finding it awkward, nor unromantic that he'd chosen to ask in the first place.

It was time to take it further, they'd both waited long enough, and this moment was theirs for the taking. He slid her underwear off slowly, trying to maintain their loving kisses without breaking concentration. He climbed between her legs, her arms encircled him and he guided himself to her, trying to maintain that same level of control he'd felt when she'd first touched him.

Gil wouldn't ever be able to explain the incredible solace he felt the moment they united as he moved forward to meet her to the hilt. He'd known if it weren't for the sheath around him, he might have been brought over right then, the intensity of the moment, being against her, being within her. It was almost more than he could stand.

Everything at that moment seemed to fall in to place and make sense. Nothing felt more right than making love with Sara. Despite the normality of the evening, there couldn't have been a more perfect moment, and a more perfect place.

The rhythm between them remained steady, rolling their hips against each others in perfect unison, sharing soft tender kisses as their hands roamed bare skin in soft caresses. It felt like more than sex…more than making love and more than just the next step in their relationship.

Gil had never felt so complete in all his life, the puzzle he'd claimed to be had found the rest of the missing pieces and it was Sara who had them all. Somewhere in his mind he'd always wondered if the love he felt could have been mistaken for something else. If this feeling now, this incredible emotional and physical experience wasn't love, then he didn't want to know what it was.

Sara was the first to be brought over, Gil felt the spasms around him and her moans became indescribably louder than he'd thought they could ever be. The sound of her, and the sensations of her was what finally brought him to climax too. He wasn't sure if he made any noise at all, the raw pleasure that rushed through every nerve seemed to drown out everything from the sounds in the room to the warmth of her body.

Drained, but fulfilled, he withdrew, lying against her in the dark, his cheek against her left breast, her arms around her. The familiar fatigue that always seemed to follow after love-making began to tug at his senses, and he closed his eyes. He felt her kiss his hair before he slipped into a content, dreamless sleep.

This chapter was probably not so blah for some of you. Whilst some others might be disturbed, I don't know. I tried to make it as incredibly non perverse as possible...hope it worked.

You have NO idea how hard this chapter was to write by the way (for those of you who thought I might sit here giggling like a maniac trying to write sex scenes, I didn't with this one, I took it really seriously).

I'll mention the lovely people who reviewed in the next chapter.

Do I get a break yet?

SS