Metroid:

stupidity and menstral

Samus got out of her ship and looked around. She was in her suit and ready for some kick ass battle. But no soner did she get out she saw a movement on her left. And right! She ducked down and crawled under her ship. Her arm cannon set on power. She saw hundreds of legs surround her ship. She immidiatly shot at every last one of them. Parylizing screams echoed in her ears. She had to get out of this place! She rolled out and jumped up. She ran for the nearest cover there was. She was on her knees charging a power blast. She saw something fly past her at great speed and shot the beam at it. The creature went limp and fell to the ground. A massive hole through it. She still heard the screams.

"Good evening, tonight we have devastatng news. More than thirty people dead. Only one survivor. A woman in a tin suit who the goverment calls samus aran was seen today blowing off the legs of pedestrians. We advise you to lock your doors and windows. Hide your children and get the---- HELL OUT OF THERE!"

That was on the news here on earth last night. Samus killed that poor guy who always hits on his fellow newscaster. His also, guy, newscaster. Samus has gone freakin' crazy or something and is killing everyone. She even shot a man on a bike! She must be going through her menstral cycle again. oh boy here we go again. Last time she tried to kill the president. She tackled him and yelled "F$# you, you stupid a f Die!" It is a good thing that guy was fat because she couldn't reach around his fat rolls to choke him.

"So samus is on earth killing her own sickening wrace and we are finnally getting some results with these metroids," a space pirate said after turning off his galactic Tv. "Man this is frickin awesome." "Yes I know," replied his chief. "no, my TV gets every possible channel in the universe!"

Samus ducked dodging piercing bullets of a similar weapon of her home. Men in stupid green clothes were following her and trying to elliminate her. She shot each of the with one beam each. This is easy for her. No aromor at all. she saw a native creature and its young running past. she ran and took the creature's juvinile age child for interrogation. "Where do you come from?" The boy thought she was hot and began his routne he called reel-um-in. she was annoyed and shot him.

We do not know how long this cycle will last but for the time being, RUN!