Disclaimer: All Harry Potter people, places, and things, (all Harry Potter nouns) belong to J. K. Rowlings. (This story takes place during Harry's sixth year.)
Chapter 4: Wish upon a star
"I won't terminate the pregnancy if that is what you are implying. No matter the consequences, I can't do that," Minerva declared. She paused in thought for a moment. "What about a concealing spell that causes me to look as I usually do?"
Poppy shook her head. "It wouldn't work. Because of the incident with the stunners, that sort of magic won't work on you. However, you robes will hide you for about another three months, time enough to find another solution."
"Albus would probably like to know about this someday also," Rolanda reminded.
Minerva broke away from her friends and wandered over to the window again. As she spotted Albus returning, she spoke. "I won't give up the child. Albus and I both love children. It would be cruel and unfair to him," she whispered more to herself than anyone else. "I intend to find a way to keep the child and eventually I will have the courage to tell him. For now, I'll just try to get through this along with everything else."
Before she left, Poppy handed her three vials of liquid, one blue, one green, and one red. "The blue one is for nausea. Take it as soon as you wake up every morning and it should keep your stomach at bay. The red and the green ones are vitamins that you should take twice a day." Minerva thanked her and decided to take a walk in the castle after depositing the vials in her rooms. She walked off in a daze, not even paying attention to her surroundings. Soon her feet led her to the Astronomy Tower.
As she stared at the grounds from the window, tears formed in her eyes again and she sank down on the floor by the wall, hugging her knees and allowing herself to cry again. She did not hear the footsteps of a compassionate friend who happened to be passing by. She inhaled sharply with surprise when she felt two gently hands cupping her face and lifting her head up.
"My dear Tabby, what has hurt you this much? It breaks my heart to see you so distraught," Albus whispered, kneeling next to her on the cool stone floor.
She only looked away and shook her head. Wanting to comfort her, he did the only thing that came to mind and wrapped his arms around her. He held her as she cried on his shoulder for what felt like hours. When she finally stopped crying, she stood and collected herself. Albus stood and observed her to make certain that she was alright.
Looking at her shoes, she spoke. "I cannot thank you enough for coming by when you did."
He smiled and rested a hand on her shoulder. "It was really no trouble at all. I only wish you would tell me what all the fuss is about."
She adamantly shook her head. "I can't, not right now."
Albus sighed and turned toward the window. Minerva was about to leave when he abruptly grasped her sleeve. "Tabby look quickly!"
"What is it?" she inquired as he brought her over to the window.
A single spark of light skidded across the dark sky. "That is a falling star. Make a wish," he told her. After a pause he spoke again. "Did you make a wish?"
She faced him and smiled genuinely. "You never have planned on growing up, have you?"
He chuckled. "My dear, why would I bother to grow up when feeling young is so much more entertaining? Now, about that wish…"
"I did make one, but you know very well that if you tell a wish, it will not come true," she reminded.
He noticed that she was about to leave again and made another attempt to stop her. "If you refuse to tell me what is bothering you, then at least let me help to alleviate some of your stress."
Walking behind her, he began to massage her shoulders. This is exactly what I needed. I could honestly stay right here forever, she thought to herself. Then he pressed a quick, light kiss to her temple and backed away. "I suppose we ought to be going," she stated.
He nodded and took her hands in his. "You've been here quite a while. Perhaps you would like to join me for dinner?"
Had she heard something hopeful in his voice? She considered the possibility for a second but then changed her mind. "I should go. I have marking to finish and a few other matters to tend to."
She could not miss the obvious look of disappointment in his eyes. He sighed and let her hands go. "Very well, my dear; I wish you a good evening then."
He started to leave, but she caught up to him. "Albus wait," she began. He turned and faced her, giving her his full attention. "I wanted to tell you…" she trailed off, realizing that she still lacked the courage to tell him the truth. "I wanted to thank you for what you did this afternoon."
Pulling her into a gentle hug, he whispered in her ear. "I will always be here for you when you need to talk or when you need someone to share your burdens, my dear, always."
They parted and she headed back to her rooms. After taking the vitamin potions she made herself dinner and allowed her thoughts to wander. Why does he have to be so good at making me feel better and worse at the same time? I love him, and now I find that I'm carrying his child, and I still couldn't tell him. I thought Gryffindors were known for their courage and here I stand, head of the house and afraid of rejection from Albus. She fell asleep on the couch that evening, remembering the massage and his kind words.
The days in January and most of February were quiet until the last week of February. As she sat at her desk reading essays, Minerva received an owl from Albus asking her to meet him. Knowing the password she entered his office, concern written all over her face. "Albus, what's this all about?"
He sighed and handed her a cup of tea. "My dear, you might want to sit down."
She took his suggestion, sitting carefully to avoid any awkward placement of her robes that might have revealed her condition. Now almost four months along, she still had not found anything that could conceal her situation. Once she had settled herself, she sipped the tea and raised an eyebrow.
"In order for you to serve raspberry tea, you must have something incredibly serious to tell me. You only serve raspberry tea when something is bothering you," she pointed out.
He nodded gravely and sat next to her. "Minerva, I've just received word from the Ministry of Magic. Voldemort and his deatheaters are headed for Hogwarts."
"Merlin no! Albus, what will we do?" she questioned.
"The Order and several Aurors will be here shortly. I have also considered taking Mr. Potter's officer for Dumbledore's army," he mentioned.
She set the tea down and shook her head firmly. "Albus, they're just children. What would they're parents think? You wouldn't knowingly send your own child off into a battle would you?"
It suddenly occurred to her what had just said and she took a sip of tea, hoping to cover the blush that was spreading across her face. Albus raised an eyebrow and she was worried that he would ask her to clarify her statement. "Tabby, I understand your concern, but it is not what their parents would think that concerns me at the moment. These children will help whether we permit them to or not, and therefore it would be best if we allow them to work with us. That way they could organize themselves in a safe and orderly fashion instead of trying to fight and hiding from us at the same time."
"That sounds incredibly rational. Though I still do not approve of this idea, you do have a very good point. How soon is all this to take place?" she inquired.
He leaned back in the chair and sighed heavily. "I would say that the battle as well as the conclusion to the prophecy will take place within the next two days."
Minerva nearly dropped her teacup. "Oh Merlin! Is that really enough time to prepare ourselves?"
He touched her cheek with his hand. "It will have to be. There is another matter I must discuss with you though. I do not want you involved in the battle. It is far too dangerous and I could not bear it if you were injured. It was difficult enough when you were hit with those stunners. I think it would be best if you stayed here and held up the fort."
"I agree," she said as he took a sip of his tea. After discussing a few more details regarding preparation, they hugged and parted company.
I cannot believe my luck that he didn't catch the verbal slip. Though I would rather go and fight, I have someone else other than myself to worry about and therefore precautions must be taken, she reasoned as she walked toward her rooms. The next few days had the potential to be the worst of her life and she had volunteered to help with the binding spells of the castle.
Voldemort and the deatheaters were spotted almost exactly two days after Albus and Minerva had conversed. The students, with the exception of Dumbledore's Army, were ushered to their dormitories and instructed to stay within their rooms or the Common Room. As the professors were preparing to go to battle in the foyer, Albus spotted Minerva helping the others and sauntered over to her.
"Minerva, may I speak with you for a moment?" he asked.
She nodded and followed him to a corner out of everyone else' line of sight. "Albus, you look tired. Are you certain that you yourself should fight this battle?" she inquired with compassion.
He smiled and kissed her hand. "My Minerva, always looking out for me, how I shall miss you if this does not turn out well."
Distress flashed in her green eyes. "Albus, what is this all about?"
He held both of her hands in his as he spoke. "If anything should happen to me, because you are Deputy Headmistress of the school, I want you to be ready to take the position of Headmistress."
She removed her hands from his and placed them on his shoulders. "I know that, and I am prepared. But I also know that you'll come back. Why must you be so negative?"
Tears had begun to form in her eyes. He pulled her into an embrace and kissed the top of her head. "You know I cannot promise that. How do you know that I will be back?"
She sniffed and tried to think of a way to explain without saying much. "Because you have no idea how lonely I shall be if you don't."
"You mean the world to me, Tabby, you always have. For you I will try to come back," he whispered. Then he slid his hand under her chin and their eyes met. He leaned down and kissed her warmly.
They parted hearing the ruckus outside. "You had better go while I'm still able to let you go," she told him.
He merely nodded and kissed her hand again before heading out with the others. When the battle began, Minerva attempted to peer out of the windows to watch, but bluish smoke soon filled the air and everything was hidden in an eerie haze. She spent the night sitting by the window in the infirmary, waiting for the light of the next day to reveal the outcome.
(my thanks to Quill of Minerva, LinZE, esb, kidarock, Lady Urquentha, Lady Jolly, TartanLioness, Leta McGotor, Melissa, miss mcGonagle, Silver Sorceress, and Subbulakshmi for reviewing :D)