'oh shit, he took my ticket, and it had my name and seat on their. How could I be so stupid!' Lily thought as she scooted down in her chair so no one on stage could see her. Amanda held her up by her arm, so Lily covered her face with her hands. Thesecurity guard whispered something in Remus' ear. "I believe that I am right in saying that Lily is in seat 5, row 7. Lily, if you really don't want to do this, Sirius and I will understand, but it'll break James' heart. Come on, we're all waiting for you." Remus smiled. Lily felt the spot light come on her, but she looked at her feet. "Well,I don't have much of a choice, do I?" she mumbled. 'Oh, go up there, you know that you want to. Just because your heart is broken, doesn't mean that you have to ruin the night for everyone else.' She thought to herself. She walked up to the front of the audience where Remus helped her on to the stage. Lily could feel a blush creeping over her cheeks, as Remus spoke to the audience "well, seems that we found Lily in the audience, so all of you can stop faking now. Give it up for Lily, she'll be singing 'breath". Lily walked up to the microphone, her hair almost completely covering her face. "Hi, um, as you know, I'm Lily Evans. You can probably imagine how surprised I am that this concert was dedicated to me, I mean, I haven't seen these guys since before they became famous, and I haven't heard these songs since I was in school. I haven't sung this song in a while; I'll be surprised if I even can, so if I screw up, well, blame them for making me sing this. Anyway, I wrote this when I was in, uh, 11th grade, I guess it would be, and it was for a friend of mine. She's dead now, but when we were younger, she came up with this story that she wrote, and this song is based on that story. So, here it goes, 'breath." She said as the song started. 2 am and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake, " Come and help me unravel my latest mistake, don't love him, winter just wasn't my season." Yeah, we walked through the doors, So accusing, their eyes, Like they have any right at all to criticize, Hypocrites, you're all here for the very same reason. cause, you can't jump the tracks, We're like cars on a cable Life's like an hourglass, Glued to the table. No one can find the rewind button, girl, So cradle your head in your hands, And breath, Just breath, Oh breath, Just breath. May he turn 21 on the base of fort bliss, Just today, he sat down to the flask in his fist, Ain't been sober, since maybe October of last year. Given time you can tell he's been down for a while, But, "my god it's so beautiful", and the boy smiles, And I hold him; maybe I'll just sing about it. Cause you can't jump the track, We're like cars on a cable, Life's like an hourglass, glued to the table. And no one can find the rewind button, boys, So cradle your head in your hands, And breath, Just breath, Oh breath, Just breath. There's a light at the end of this tunnel, You shout, cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out. These mistakes you make, You'll just make them again, If you'd only try turning around. 2 a.m. and I'm still awake, Writing a song, If I get it all down on paper, It's no longer inside of me, Threatening the life it belongs to. And I feel like I'm naked In front of a crowd, Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud, And I know that you'll use them however you want to. But you can't jump the track, We're like cars on a cable. Life's like an hourglass, Glued to the table. No one can find the rewind button, now, Sing it if you understand, And breath, Just breath, Oh breath, Just breath. Oh breath, Just breath. The audience was screaming and cheering. I couldn't have been that good, I hadn't practiced or anything, but they were still cheering. Remus came up from behind be and said, "well, that was the end of the concert, I hope you liked it. Those of you with back stage passes, the after party is about to start." He told the audience. After that he came up to me and hugged me. "It's great to see you again, Lily." He told me. I was about to reply when someone tapped on my shoulder. "You come up here and say hi to Remus before me? Lily, you should be ashamed." I turned around to see Sirius, the man who does not fit his names. I smiled as he hugged me. "Hi Sirius, how are you?" I asked him, but before he could answer, I was, one again tapped on the shoulder. I turned around to see the most wonderful brown eyes that I have ever seen. "Hi Lily." Was all James managed to say before I had my arms around his neck. I know I wasn't still with him, but I could still hug him, right? Oh, heck, just for tonight, I could do anything. He squeezed me hard, but I didn't care. After not seeing him, the love of my life, for over a year, I would do anything to hold him again. "You were great." He whispered in my ear. "You were better." I told him. Unfortunately, that was all I got to say to him before some fan freaks tore him away from me again. I turned around to see Joanna McElfish looking back at me. "Lily, great to see you! You were wonderful out there, that song was beautiful." She said. I could tell that she was sucking up to me. I sighed. "Yeah, sure, Joanna, I'll introduce you to Sirius." She rolled her eyes." Yeah, I was getting to that, but, before you bring me to him, what are you doing here? What ever happened to 'oh, Joanna, I'd love to go, but I'm just too nervous about seeing James so soon. Maybe I'll go to another concert with you'?" "Yeah, well, you know, I changed my mind and…" I was going to continue, but Joanna got me to the part that she really wanted to hear. "Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure whatever, now, take me to Sirius." I rolled my eyes at her and led her over to Sirius, whom I had barely talked to myself. I tapped him on the shoulder. He had been talking to some fan girl that had been batting her eyes and leaning up against him while he was trying to escape her. "Hey Sirius, I want you to meet somebody." I told him. I had to drag him away from the girl he had been talking to, she must have been more like a groupie, because when I led Sirius away, she grabbed my arm, dug her nails in and immediately said "he's mine." Of course, there were police on the scene to handle crazy people like her, but as soon as she was away, Sirius told me "thank you! She was really starting to get on my nerves there. Damn fans. Anyway, you were saying." "Well, if you're feeling pissed off about fans right now, then I should probably just talk to you later…" I started, but Sirius contradicted, "oh no, go ahead." He told me. " Ok, well, I want you to meet my friend Joanna McElfish. She's really nice, and I promise that she won't be all over you, she's not like that, I hope." I said. He looked suspiciously at me, but he followed.
"Sirius, this is Joanna McElfish, Joanna, this is Sirius Black." I said, introducing them. They shook hands, and, surprisingly, Sirius started a conversation about something, I probably didn't want to know, seeing as this is Sirius that we're talking about, so I left them to look for my friends. It didn't take long. "OH MY GOD, LILY, YOU WERE FANTASTIC! I DIDN'T KNOW THAT YOU COULD SING THAT WELL!" Amanda yelled out for the whole room to hear. "Uh, thanks." I whispered. "Have you seen the rest of our group?" Amanda and I looked around till we found Hannah and Scarlet. Once we found them, I tried to make a beeline for the punch bowl, but was stopped, ONCE AGAIN; this stuff is starting to piss me off. It was Remus. It wasn't who I thought it was, but it was better then listening to someone tell me that I sang well one more time. "Hi Remus." I said. "Hi Lily. Have you talked to James yet? He really wants to see you?" I nodded. "Yeah, but all I got to say was 'hi' before he was dragged away by another fan. I guess you guys must have a lot more fans now that you're famous." I said, starting a conversation. "Yeah, but of course, I don't mind it as much, since their mostly James and Sirius fans, so I don't get it as bad. So, Lily, how have you been?" he asked. 'Uh, I've been really depressed taking care of a baby all by myself' is what I wanted to say, but even I'm not that stupid. "I've been alright, I guess. I've been way too busy with, um, work, so I thought I wasn't going to be able to make it, but Amanda dragged me along. I'm really glad they did, though; I haven't had this much fun in what seems like forever. " I said. "Yeah, it sure does. What are you doing for a job now?" he asked me. 'Evans babysitting, what else?' I wanted to say, but instead "um, I'm working in an Auror office now." I lied. I could never work as an Auror; I didn't even go through the training. Remus smiled. "Ah, of course, we always thought you would do something like that". I don't know why, but I had the faintest idea that he was lying just then. You see, Remus was never good at lying like James and Sirius were, that's why he couldn't get away with things like this as easily. Maybe he thought that I wasn't smart enough to be an Auror, maybe he knew something that I didn't, but whatever it was, Remus was lying about it. "Well, Remus, I'm going to go find Scarlet, if you'll excuse me." As soon as Lily left, Remus went off to find Sirius. He found Sirius talking to a pretty blonde girl, surprise, surprise. Remus had to drag him away. "Did she spill?" Sirius asked when they were sure that they could not be heard. "No, she told me that she was busy working as an Auror and that she hardly had any time to herself. Padfoot, I know that you are very confident that you saw Lily, but are you positive that you saw her with a baby and that the baby was hers?" Remus asked. "For the millionth time, yes, it was her. You don't carry around a baby everywhere you go if it's not yours." "Well, how do you know that it's James' baby? I mean, Lily's hardly talked to him, and it's been an entire year since we've seen her, she could be married for all we know." Remus said. "Remus, I know that you're the smart one, but right now, you're being an idiot! Of course it's his son, it looked exactly like a mini me of James! I saw him my own eyes, I sat next to them on the freakin' plane! Besides, would Amanda scream, "oh my god, he looks just like James" at the top of her lungs for no reason? Of course not, we know her better then that." "Well, fine. So James has a son and doesn't even know it. Lily has been hiding it from him, and doesn't want any of her oldest and dearest friends to know about it. And here we are, talking about it behind her back, and we're not even bothering to tell James! Am I the only one that feels guilty here!" Remus practically yelled. Sirius sighed. "No, you're not. It's just, I tried telling him a little while before the concert, but he was so exited that she was even coming to town that he couldn't sit still. It just didn't feel right that I was telling him. It shouldn't be me." Remus shook his head. "Yes, I know, the person who should be telling him should be Lily, but, incase you didn't notice, she hasn't, and, by the looks of it, doesn't plan on doing just that any time soon. Look, Lily will probably be leaving to go back to wherever she's been for the past year soon, and we'll be leaving to finish the tour soon. James has more of a right to know about this then we do, wouldn't you rather tell him while they can still see each other? If we do it by the time it's too late, he'll be devastated! He'll never be able to find her again, and if he'd know that he has a son somewhere out there, which means that he'll be even more depressed then he has been! I know that neither of us want him to be depressed any longer."< Sirius rolled his eyes. "Well, if you're so determined for James to know so soon, then why don't you go out there and scream to him that he's a bloody father! I can't do that; it's not my place! Plus, James would hate me for not telling him earlier! I can't tell him tonight because there's press swarming out there! If they got a hold of this, all means of press would go haywire! Then how do you think James will handle that? The entire wizarding world knowing about his children before he does, it's bad enough that we know before him!" Remus nodded. "I can't tell him, we made a deal. I would try to get Lily to spill, and if that didn't work, then you would tell James and we'd lock them in a room together of something. We agreed, remember?" Remus said, trying to keep his cool. "Yes, I do remember, but that was before I actually tried to tell him." Sirius sat down and put his face in his hands. "Lets think. There's got to be a better way to do this, another way to help James find out about his son without us having to tell him." Remus sat down beside his friend. "Don't you hate it when you're trying to get your friend to figure something out on their own but they're just to stupid to see it?" Sirius nodded. "James isn't stupid, he's just dumbstruck by the fact that he can see the real live Lily again. But, if he doesn't figure this out soon, our whole plan is fried and our friend will hate us." They sat in silence for a moment before Sirius yelled out "I"VE GOT IT"! So loud that it made Remus jump. "What? What have you got? Another plan?" Sirius shook his head furiously. "Yes! Well, it's not that different from our old plan, actually. All we change is instead of directly telling James, we get Lily's address from Amanda of one of them while the after party is still going on. Then, we make her pull a Cinderella and make sure that James doesn't know when she leaves. Then, he'll of course want to say a proper good-bye, but certain friends of his will have the address to her house, so that he'll not only be able to say good bye, but he'll be able to find out about their son and get back together with her! It'll work perfectly! Please can we do it? I want to see if one of my plans will work!" Remus ran it through his head several times. "You know Sirius, this might work." So, they set out to find Amanda and get Lily's address. Lily had just been talking to Scarlet, but scarlet went off to talk to someone, so Lily sat down on one of the couches and took the chance to soak in the scenery. She didn't get long, though, because after a few minutes, she noticed that James was sitting next to her. "Oh, hi!" he said when he noticed that she was looking at him. She blushed, "hi." They sat in silence for a moment before James asked, "are you having fun?" she looked up at him. "Yeah, I'm having a great time. You?" he nodded. "It'd be a lot better without all of these fans and interviewers around asking me stupid questions that everyone already knows the answer to." Lily smiled. "I guess that you get a lot less time to just be you now that you're so busy, huh?"< "You have no idea. I wake up every morning, and earl, our assistant, says 'ok, first you have an interview with so-and-so magazine from 6:00 to 8:00. Then you have to meet with this other famous person to plan that dinner that you're doing together to sponsor some stupid meaningless thing from 9:00 to 2:00. Then you have to meet with your trainer to do positively exhausting things that are totally pointless because you're not fit enough for the photo shoot that you'll be doing next week.' I swear, the guy's a total nerd, and he's practically obsessed with his boss, our manager, because he hates his job, but still does everything that he says. I don't think that I've done anything related at all with music in 6 months." "But you're perfectly fit, you have been since school. Why do they make you exercise?" he rolled his eyes. Then he said, in a mocking voice "because the cameras add 10 pounds.' I used to love this job, till we were loved by the crowd, now, this was the first time I've sung anything since that concert we did when we were 'discovered'. I'd give anything to take back that night," he said. Lily looked at the floor. "I think we all would." She whispered, but he still heard. "Oh, I mean… I didn't mean it like that." She smiled. "It's ok. I know you didn't" she looked at the floor again. "You know, I don't even remember why we broke up in the first place. Do you?" she looked up into his eyes again. "Nope. I have no idea." James laughed. "It's funny. We break up, and here, a year later, we don't even remember why." Lily shook her head. "We didn't break up, you broke up with me." "No it was not, I distinctly remember you breaking up with me." He said smiling. "Oh it was not me." She said. "Oh yes it was. " He said, tickling her. She laughed and pretended to slap his arm. "It was not." So they ended up laughing. It was true, Lily had not been this happy since she saw James last. He was still the same person. He complained about anything, but only to make it a joke. He was still the childish, immature, funny, queer person that she had fallen in love with a long time ago. They talked for hours, about everything from the way the lights in the room made shadows like the nightlight that lily had had when she was little, to the way James' nose was always stuck in the mornings from sleeping on it. After a while, lily excused herself to go to the bathroom when she noticed the time. She had promised Mrs. Stephens that she would be by to pick up Harry at 9:00, and that it was 8:15, and it took an hour and a half to get home. She ran to grab Amanda and drag her to the car. It was only by the time that she had just left the concert hall parking lot that she had realized that she had forgotten to say good-bye. Later, at home, with Harry I picked Harry up from Mrs. Stephens house, and it was 9:30. She had been forgiving, as she had not even noticed what time it was. When I had entered the house, Mrs. Stephens and Harry were in the living room, on the floor, just looking through a box of old baby toys that had been Monica's. When I got home, I was exhausted, and upset. I had talked to him for hours, I was having the time of my life, and then I go without saying good-bye. He's probably going to think that I ditched him. Left him hanging, waiting. I hated myself. I sat in the rocking chair in Harry's room with the baby in my arms. While I was tired, apparently Harry was wide-awake, and I could not sleep till he did. "I saw daddy tonight, Harry." I told him calmly. He looked up at the name Daddy. "Daddy?" he said in reply. "No, Harry, you won't get to see daddy." He gave me the puppy dog eyes that James was famous for (not literally). Harry may have my eyes, but all of his facial expressions belong to James. If only he knew… I stayed up with Harry for an hour and a half, and Harry still didn't sleep, so I took him to bed with me. "I guess you'll just have to sleep with me tonight. That ok with you?" I asked. Harry smiled a toothless smile. He loved to sleep with me. He knew already that I would never end up asleep, but that we would stay up looking at pictures of when I was little, when my parents were alive Tonight, of course, would be different. Now that I had mentioned 'daddy', tonight would be even more pictures of daddy. So, I took out my photo album. I turned to the picture of the snowball fight. Harry studied it for a moment, then pointed to Sirius and looked up at me. "That's Sirius, daddy's friend." Harry looked back at the picture and said "sususus" I smiled. "Close enough." I turned to another picture and pointed at Remus. "Remus." I said. "Wemus." He replied. He had a long way to go, but it was a start. As soon as Harry finally fell asleep, I put him back in his crib and went to sleep in the rocking chair in his room. No way was I going to sleep alone tonight. After a few sweet minutes of dozing, though, I heard the doorbell ring. Well, that's the third chapter. DO NOT WORRY PEOPLE, THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE OUT BY FRIDAY, I PROMISE YOU! If not, you all have the right to flame me, but only after Friday. Well, please review! I hope you liked this chapter. Oh yeah, the next chapter will be the one you've all been waiting for!