Chapter 7: Womanly Pride
"Hey Captain, I've got the U.M.N. pulse." chaos said from his station.
"FINALLY!" Matthews said, stretching in his throne above Hammer's head. He lowered his mechanical chair so that his foot was level with hammer's head. hammer tensed up and hunched over the controls, "Hammer, connect the servers and prepare ta long jump already. I'm gettin' sick of this place.
"This space looks just the same as any other boring space." Tony said, still relaxed at the wheel, picking at something mindlessly. Matthews looked at him quietly then shook his head angrily, kicking Hammer in the head.
"Heeey! What'd I doooo?" Hammer cried, holding his head.
"Listen ya morons, you don't just question me, my word is law, you hear?" Matthews said, slapping his arm on the chair. Hammer squeaked and began to type furiously at his station.
"Ya. Connection successful, sir." Hammer said in a bored voice. Tony sat up in an entertaining way.
"Hup. I Know what that means. Glad I'm not the captain." Tony said, fidgeting with he steering wheel.
"What does that mean, ya moron?" Matthew yelled back, clenching his fists.
"You're the one who has to walk around a buncha sophisticated types askin' for directions and bein' all quiet asking for our next assignment!" Tony laughed. Hammer began to laugh, trying his hardest to hold it back, the fear of the captain's foot lodged in his brain.
"Humph. If you think it's such an easy job then why don't ya do it?" Matthews said, pointing directly at Tony.
"Huh? No, no...you don't mean that!" Tony said, kneeling on his chair backward, his head resting on his folded arms on the back of the chair, his eyes pleading.
"Naw, now that I think of it you're just the moron for the job!" Matthews began to smirk, rubbing his chin in his own malicious satisfaction. Tony's face drooped.
"No, sir! I'm pretty damn sure you really, really didn't mean it!!" Tony said, shaking his chair forward and backward in a childish panic.
"Listen, Tony! When we reach the Kukai Foundation you're gonna march your ass in there, report every damn thing ya did and come back with the assignment!" Matthews said sternly. It was quiet. Very, horribly quiet. Then Tony just whimpered, sliding back into his chair the right way so that they couldn't see his head; probably in a fetal position. Hammer and chaos looked at each other worriedly, with faces that said, 'What's the big deal' and 'Is he gonna die?'.
"You hear me Tony?" Matthews' large voice broke the hurtful silence.
"Ya. I heard ya." Tony said, arms folded over his chest in a self-indulgent tantrum.
"We're almost at the foundation." Hammer said meekly as if he had just walked in on a father scolding his child.
"Right." Matthews said, the smirk reappearing on his face, "I'll be in the cafe then." Matthews got up from his chair and began to walk to the door. The Elsa jolted a second, like a car with it's breaks slammed on then resumed, Matthews viciously planted on his face.
"Tony ya shithead! Ya better watch yer back ya yellow-livered backstabbin' moron if I ever..." Matthews mumbled curse after curse as he left the room holding his face. As he left Hammer let out a breath of tension.
"Man, Tony you're such a baby. What's the problem?" Hammer nagged. Tony kicked something and jumped out his chair, staring at Hammer under his hair.
"I hate goin' in the foundation on business." Tony muttered.
"Why? I thought you loved the women there..." chaos said, a ponderous face on.
"Ya, I do but everyone laughs at me when they see the in the assignment room. The assignment room is for the lowest worst crew of the universe who can't do nothin' but menial tasks. It's humiliatin', that's what!"
"Geez, Tony didn't know you felt that way." Hammer said, almost sympathetically.
"Ya you wouldn't know, you're to geeky to even dream of pickin' up a girl." Tony said, walking past his station.
"Why, you!" Hammer said, jumping up to strangle him as Tony did some sort of strange defensive dance.
"Guys, we mustn't fight over such trivial matters." Chaos said quietly, walking up and grabbing each of their wrists.
"Man, chaos. I don't wanna do this thing!" Tony whined again. Chaos stopped to think.
"Well, why not? None of those people know you and probably won't see you again. You shouldn't care what they think." Chaos said thinly, in thought. Tony's looked depressed at the though.
"Ah, it doesn't matter. I feel all embarrassed when a girl sees me near dat room. I can't help it. It's my pride as a dude."
"Ok..." Chaos said, trying a bit too hard to think of a solution., "then how about you go in as a girl?" Hammer and Tony looked at him as if he was the worse person for advise ever.
"Dude. Chaos. That's not gonna help my dude pride." Tony said, one eyebrow raised.
"Well why not? I mean if you don't look like a man then you shouldn't have to worry about other men or women thinking you're a...square." Chaos said, trying to make it into words that Tony would understand.
"You know chaos...that sounds like the dumbest idea ever but... if you can pull it off, so can I!" Tony said, a sudden spark of determination in his face.
'What does he mean if I can pull it off?' chaos thought.
"Man, where are we gonna get woman's clothing?" Hammer said, disappointed that he may not be able to see Tony in a dress.
"Dude, Hammer, Listen to me pal. If you and pixie come to the foundation with me you can put any damn piece of woman's clothing on me just as long as ya don't laugh!" Tony said, grabbing Hammer by the collar and looking straight into his eyes. Hammer snickered.
"Then let me get it all out now!" Hammer said, hardly able to finish his sentence before he began rolling on the floor laughing. After a few seconds, Tony shook his head.
"Aren't I glad you're my friend." Tony said sarcasictally and regretfully. Hammer began to stand up, tears in his eyes and his laughing waning.
"No, I'm cool, I'm cool." Hammer smiled, wiping the tears of laughter from his eyes, "Let's go."
In the Kukai foundation in one of the towns, Hammer, Tony, and chaos all sat at the seedy store line. There was dust and garbage abound.
"How am I supposed to get a convincing disguise from a place like this?" Tony said, looking at the time nervously.
"Relax, Tony. Believe me, this is the ONLY place a man can buy a dress and look right." Hammer said. He stepped up next in line, "Yes, sir. I'd like the best dress you have please. it has to be pretty lengthy."
"Who's the lucky dame?" The dirty looking man with a moth eaten hat muttered, turning around to look in his boxes of inventory.
"Ah this guy over here. He's gotta look convincing." Hammer said, leaning on the counter as if he was talking about the weather. Tony blushed.
"Hey? What's with the innocent act? I ain't that kinda dude!" Tony said, looking furiously between the manager and Hammer. Chaos let out a small laugh then put his hand on Tony's shoulder.
"Don't worry Tony, I'm sure Hammer knows what he's doing. Aren't you glad he's helping?"
"Ya I guess." Tony said, crossing his arms, wishing he hadn't taken up on chaos' offer. The manager laid a nice and modest dress upon the counter.
"This is a good one, covers a lot." The man said, pointing to spots where skin would usually show, "and I gots stuffin' too but that'll cost extra."
"Stuffing?" Tony cried.
"Ya, we'll pay the extra, thank you." Hammer smiled. Hammer turned to Tony holding the dress up, "Ya. It matches your eyes." Hammer smiled. Tony's eyes narrowed and he snatched up the dress.
"Let's get this thing over with." With that, Tony left to privacy.
Moments later Tony came back in the cotton green dress.
"Does this make me look fat?" Tony said, holding his arms out.
"Ah of course not." Hammer said, stuffing the extra cloth into his dress. Tony sighed, grabbing his dress away from Hammer.
"I can do this myself thank you." He said jeeringly.
"You look very nice, Tony. You should wear dresses more often." Chaos said. Tony looked over his shoulder with an insane look.
"What are you talkin' about? I'm no cross-dresser!" He said loudly.
"Well women wear pants, why can't men wear dresses?" Chaos said. There was a silence for a second until hammer began to whisper in Tony's ear.
"That'd explain a lot, I don't think he understands humans."
"Ya I used to think he was just 'misunderstood' but maybe he just has different 'interests'."
After Tony had finished, the three stood in front of the rested Durandal. Tony gripped his fists and marched on quietly.
"What a brave man." chaos said.
"What are you talking about? He did this because he's a chicken anyway." Hammer said, "Now let's go back to the Elsa."
In the Durandal, Tony walked stiff-legged, looking to the floor. He didn't want anyone to see his face in the ridiculous outfit. He ignored anyone walking around him as he made a beeline to the assignment room. He began to walk faster, feeling the walls closing in around him. Singling him out. Suddenly he was pushed back as he ran into another person.
"Hey watch where you're..." Tony began. He shook his head and looked up. It was a man in a dark black and green suit with well-groomed black hair.
"My apologies, ma'am. I should learn to pay more attention to where I am going." He smiled charmingly, his teeth sparkling. Tony gagged to himself but only chuckled mindlessly as if in agreement.
"Err...thank you, "Tony said in a fake higher voice, " I must be going now."
"No wait..." The man said, grabbing Tony's wrist. Tony moaned, his face nervous and blushing. He couldn't live another day if he were caught, "What is your name?"
"Oh...my name?" Tony said nervously, "It's..." Tony thought, trying to come up with a woman's name out of nowhere was harder than he thought. He looked around but everyone was looking at him and the tall, distinguished man.
"It's uh...Makoto! Makoto Tsuyoshi!" he snatched his arm back and began to run away. He didn't want anything to do with he people who had seen him. As soon as the indigo door came into sight, he ran to it, opened it and shut it behind him as soon a s possible.
"Oh a nice lady like you shouldn't be running in the halls." A man said at the counter of the dull gray-blue room.
"Uh...ya. I need an assignment for the elsa, okay? Make it quick!" Tony said, hardly maksing his voice.
"Fine, fine." The man said, turning around to his filing cabniet. He took his time paging through the many manilla files marked with letters. Tony waited on a hard blue couch, tapping his foot impatiently.
"Ah. here we go. This assignment is perfect for the Elsa." He said, a long brown envelope in his hand. Tony snatched it up quickly.
"Thank you!" He said, running out of the room without another word.
Back at the Elsa and dressed in his regular garb, Tony came to the cafe where the captain sat reading a screen, looking bored.
"Captain, I have the assignment." Tony said as if it had been nothing. Matthews took the envelope happily.
"Ah yes. You heard the news?" Matthews said. Tony shook his head no. He didn't want to make any smart remark about how he couldn't of, in fear of another order. Matthews resumed, "It's a regular Cinderella story, Gaignun Kukai got himself a notice to all the ships in the surrounding area. He's asking ta see this broad...what was it? Makoto..."
"Augh! Wait! I don't wanna know! I really just don't wanna know!" Tony said, backing up, "I got the stupid assignment, now leave me alone!" Tony said, running out of the room.
"What the? Oh well."
"Please my mysterious Makoto, return to my arms..."
AN: Yes. Randomness. Take that writer's who take their time and produce quality fanfiction! :) And about the lyrics in the last chapter, they were random phrases I either put together myself or stole from an anime I've never heard of offa animelyrics.com. With that said, I hope you liked this chapter!
"Hey Captain, I've got the U.M.N. pulse." chaos said from his station.
"FINALLY!" Matthews said, stretching in his throne above Hammer's head. He lowered his mechanical chair so that his foot was level with hammer's head. hammer tensed up and hunched over the controls, "Hammer, connect the servers and prepare ta long jump already. I'm gettin' sick of this place.
"This space looks just the same as any other boring space." Tony said, still relaxed at the wheel, picking at something mindlessly. Matthews looked at him quietly then shook his head angrily, kicking Hammer in the head.
"Heeey! What'd I doooo?" Hammer cried, holding his head.
"Listen ya morons, you don't just question me, my word is law, you hear?" Matthews said, slapping his arm on the chair. Hammer squeaked and began to type furiously at his station.
"Ya. Connection successful, sir." Hammer said in a bored voice. Tony sat up in an entertaining way.
"Hup. I Know what that means. Glad I'm not the captain." Tony said, fidgeting with he steering wheel.
"What does that mean, ya moron?" Matthew yelled back, clenching his fists.
"You're the one who has to walk around a buncha sophisticated types askin' for directions and bein' all quiet asking for our next assignment!" Tony laughed. Hammer began to laugh, trying his hardest to hold it back, the fear of the captain's foot lodged in his brain.
"Humph. If you think it's such an easy job then why don't ya do it?" Matthews said, pointing directly at Tony.
"Huh? No, no...you don't mean that!" Tony said, kneeling on his chair backward, his head resting on his folded arms on the back of the chair, his eyes pleading.
"Naw, now that I think of it you're just the moron for the job!" Matthews began to smirk, rubbing his chin in his own malicious satisfaction. Tony's face drooped.
"No, sir! I'm pretty damn sure you really, really didn't mean it!!" Tony said, shaking his chair forward and backward in a childish panic.
"Listen, Tony! When we reach the Kukai Foundation you're gonna march your ass in there, report every damn thing ya did and come back with the assignment!" Matthews said sternly. It was quiet. Very, horribly quiet. Then Tony just whimpered, sliding back into his chair the right way so that they couldn't see his head; probably in a fetal position. Hammer and chaos looked at each other worriedly, with faces that said, 'What's the big deal' and 'Is he gonna die?'.
"You hear me Tony?" Matthews' large voice broke the hurtful silence.
"Ya. I heard ya." Tony said, arms folded over his chest in a self-indulgent tantrum.
"We're almost at the foundation." Hammer said meekly as if he had just walked in on a father scolding his child.
"Right." Matthews said, the smirk reappearing on his face, "I'll be in the cafe then." Matthews got up from his chair and began to walk to the door. The Elsa jolted a second, like a car with it's breaks slammed on then resumed, Matthews viciously planted on his face.
"Tony ya shithead! Ya better watch yer back ya yellow-livered backstabbin' moron if I ever..." Matthews mumbled curse after curse as he left the room holding his face. As he left Hammer let out a breath of tension.
"Man, Tony you're such a baby. What's the problem?" Hammer nagged. Tony kicked something and jumped out his chair, staring at Hammer under his hair.
"I hate goin' in the foundation on business." Tony muttered.
"Why? I thought you loved the women there..." chaos said, a ponderous face on.
"Ya, I do but everyone laughs at me when they see the in the assignment room. The assignment room is for the lowest worst crew of the universe who can't do nothin' but menial tasks. It's humiliatin', that's what!"
"Geez, Tony didn't know you felt that way." Hammer said, almost sympathetically.
"Ya you wouldn't know, you're to geeky to even dream of pickin' up a girl." Tony said, walking past his station.
"Why, you!" Hammer said, jumping up to strangle him as Tony did some sort of strange defensive dance.
"Guys, we mustn't fight over such trivial matters." Chaos said quietly, walking up and grabbing each of their wrists.
"Man, chaos. I don't wanna do this thing!" Tony whined again. Chaos stopped to think.
"Well, why not? None of those people know you and probably won't see you again. You shouldn't care what they think." Chaos said thinly, in thought. Tony's looked depressed at the though.
"Ah, it doesn't matter. I feel all embarrassed when a girl sees me near dat room. I can't help it. It's my pride as a dude."
"Ok..." Chaos said, trying a bit too hard to think of a solution., "then how about you go in as a girl?" Hammer and Tony looked at him as if he was the worse person for advise ever.
"Dude. Chaos. That's not gonna help my dude pride." Tony said, one eyebrow raised.
"Well why not? I mean if you don't look like a man then you shouldn't have to worry about other men or women thinking you're a...square." Chaos said, trying to make it into words that Tony would understand.
"You know chaos...that sounds like the dumbest idea ever but... if you can pull it off, so can I!" Tony said, a sudden spark of determination in his face.
'What does he mean if I can pull it off?' chaos thought.
"Man, where are we gonna get woman's clothing?" Hammer said, disappointed that he may not be able to see Tony in a dress.
"Dude, Hammer, Listen to me pal. If you and pixie come to the foundation with me you can put any damn piece of woman's clothing on me just as long as ya don't laugh!" Tony said, grabbing Hammer by the collar and looking straight into his eyes. Hammer snickered.
"Then let me get it all out now!" Hammer said, hardly able to finish his sentence before he began rolling on the floor laughing. After a few seconds, Tony shook his head.
"Aren't I glad you're my friend." Tony said sarcasictally and regretfully. Hammer began to stand up, tears in his eyes and his laughing waning.
"No, I'm cool, I'm cool." Hammer smiled, wiping the tears of laughter from his eyes, "Let's go."
In the Kukai foundation in one of the towns, Hammer, Tony, and chaos all sat at the seedy store line. There was dust and garbage abound.
"How am I supposed to get a convincing disguise from a place like this?" Tony said, looking at the time nervously.
"Relax, Tony. Believe me, this is the ONLY place a man can buy a dress and look right." Hammer said. He stepped up next in line, "Yes, sir. I'd like the best dress you have please. it has to be pretty lengthy."
"Who's the lucky dame?" The dirty looking man with a moth eaten hat muttered, turning around to look in his boxes of inventory.
"Ah this guy over here. He's gotta look convincing." Hammer said, leaning on the counter as if he was talking about the weather. Tony blushed.
"Hey? What's with the innocent act? I ain't that kinda dude!" Tony said, looking furiously between the manager and Hammer. Chaos let out a small laugh then put his hand on Tony's shoulder.
"Don't worry Tony, I'm sure Hammer knows what he's doing. Aren't you glad he's helping?"
"Ya I guess." Tony said, crossing his arms, wishing he hadn't taken up on chaos' offer. The manager laid a nice and modest dress upon the counter.
"This is a good one, covers a lot." The man said, pointing to spots where skin would usually show, "and I gots stuffin' too but that'll cost extra."
"Stuffing?" Tony cried.
"Ya, we'll pay the extra, thank you." Hammer smiled. Hammer turned to Tony holding the dress up, "Ya. It matches your eyes." Hammer smiled. Tony's eyes narrowed and he snatched up the dress.
"Let's get this thing over with." With that, Tony left to privacy.
Moments later Tony came back in the cotton green dress.
"Does this make me look fat?" Tony said, holding his arms out.
"Ah of course not." Hammer said, stuffing the extra cloth into his dress. Tony sighed, grabbing his dress away from Hammer.
"I can do this myself thank you." He said jeeringly.
"You look very nice, Tony. You should wear dresses more often." Chaos said. Tony looked over his shoulder with an insane look.
"What are you talkin' about? I'm no cross-dresser!" He said loudly.
"Well women wear pants, why can't men wear dresses?" Chaos said. There was a silence for a second until hammer began to whisper in Tony's ear.
"That'd explain a lot, I don't think he understands humans."
"Ya I used to think he was just 'misunderstood' but maybe he just has different 'interests'."
After Tony had finished, the three stood in front of the rested Durandal. Tony gripped his fists and marched on quietly.
"What a brave man." chaos said.
"What are you talking about? He did this because he's a chicken anyway." Hammer said, "Now let's go back to the Elsa."
In the Durandal, Tony walked stiff-legged, looking to the floor. He didn't want anyone to see his face in the ridiculous outfit. He ignored anyone walking around him as he made a beeline to the assignment room. He began to walk faster, feeling the walls closing in around him. Singling him out. Suddenly he was pushed back as he ran into another person.
"Hey watch where you're..." Tony began. He shook his head and looked up. It was a man in a dark black and green suit with well-groomed black hair.
"My apologies, ma'am. I should learn to pay more attention to where I am going." He smiled charmingly, his teeth sparkling. Tony gagged to himself but only chuckled mindlessly as if in agreement.
"Err...thank you, "Tony said in a fake higher voice, " I must be going now."
"No wait..." The man said, grabbing Tony's wrist. Tony moaned, his face nervous and blushing. He couldn't live another day if he were caught, "What is your name?"
"Oh...my name?" Tony said nervously, "It's..." Tony thought, trying to come up with a woman's name out of nowhere was harder than he thought. He looked around but everyone was looking at him and the tall, distinguished man.
"It's uh...Makoto! Makoto Tsuyoshi!" he snatched his arm back and began to run away. He didn't want anything to do with he people who had seen him. As soon as the indigo door came into sight, he ran to it, opened it and shut it behind him as soon a s possible.
"Oh a nice lady like you shouldn't be running in the halls." A man said at the counter of the dull gray-blue room.
"Uh...ya. I need an assignment for the elsa, okay? Make it quick!" Tony said, hardly maksing his voice.
"Fine, fine." The man said, turning around to his filing cabniet. He took his time paging through the many manilla files marked with letters. Tony waited on a hard blue couch, tapping his foot impatiently.
"Ah. here we go. This assignment is perfect for the Elsa." He said, a long brown envelope in his hand. Tony snatched it up quickly.
"Thank you!" He said, running out of the room without another word.
Back at the Elsa and dressed in his regular garb, Tony came to the cafe where the captain sat reading a screen, looking bored.
"Captain, I have the assignment." Tony said as if it had been nothing. Matthews took the envelope happily.
"Ah yes. You heard the news?" Matthews said. Tony shook his head no. He didn't want to make any smart remark about how he couldn't of, in fear of another order. Matthews resumed, "It's a regular Cinderella story, Gaignun Kukai got himself a notice to all the ships in the surrounding area. He's asking ta see this broad...what was it? Makoto..."
"Augh! Wait! I don't wanna know! I really just don't wanna know!" Tony said, backing up, "I got the stupid assignment, now leave me alone!" Tony said, running out of the room.
"What the? Oh well."
"Please my mysterious Makoto, return to my arms..."
AN: Yes. Randomness. Take that writer's who take their time and produce quality fanfiction! :) And about the lyrics in the last chapter, they were random phrases I either put together myself or stole from an anime I've never heard of offa animelyrics.com. With that said, I hope you liked this chapter!