RATING: Hard R
PAIRING: Remus/Harry
WORD COUNT: 377
There's a gap where he used to sit. It yawns between Harry and Remus like a chasm, and neither is sure that they would want to close it, even if they knew how to do it. It would mean admitting, really admitting, that he wasn't going to come back; neither of them were ready for that. The silence is dull and heavy, like an overcast summer's day.
"I'm going to bed," Harry says at last. His voice is flat. But he looks an entreaty at Remus before he leaves the room. Remus stirs.
"May I join you?"
Always, before, Sirius had given his permission, had sanctified their union. Tacitly, with his smiles and his encouraging hands and the little noises he made in the back of his throat, he had told his two lovers that they could touch each other.
Harry can't find the words to give that kind of permission. But he nods, and Remus follows him upstairs.
They use the spare bedroom, despite, or perhaps because of, the bed being smaller.
Remus's hands and mouth, the solid reality of his body, his scent, carry with them the blessed relief of the familiar. And yet it isn't quite right. The embrace isn't all-encompassing enough. It's too cold.
No energy for spectacular bedroom gymnastics; too much desperation, too much need, to prolong the act. Soon they're stripped, kissing so quickly and fiercely their teeth clash, just enough space left between their clinging bodies for their hands to work.
Remus is making it hard for Harry to concentrate; the speed and pressure of his hand are just right. But he's together enough to run his thumb around the head of Remus's cock, to twist his hand slightly as he strokes up and down the shaft. He can almost feel Sirius's hand over his own, the way it was the first time, feel Sirius's hot breath on his ear as he whispered just what to do. Hungrily, he claims another kiss as they hurtle towards the edge and over it. They're soaked through with him, the pair of them; maybe this is the easiest way to keep him upmost in their memories.
If either of them called his name at the climax, they're both too sensitive to mention it.