I'm not sure where this came from or even if it makes any sense whatsoever. It's a warning and not a very good one because, although I wrote it, I find myself close to the line I seek to avoid crossing. Bit dim, to tell you the truth.
Erm... rather dark, I suppose. Deals with psychotic behaviour, death, destruction and corruption of the soul. Not very well though. Completely off the top of my head and with no basis in any reality.
Except for my own, of course.
Descent into Darkness
How can you sit there and pretend to understand what is happening to me? How can you even dare look at me with your eyes filled with that disgusting pity? It makes me physically retch thinking of you all talking about me as if I have died. I have not died. I have become more powerful than you could imagine. I have not fallen, I have ascended to greatness.
You don't understand the way it happens. You can't even comprehend why it is happening. All you know is something bad is happening and you seek to solve it. It's pathetic behaviour and you disgust me. Vile creature. Filled with romantic ideals of love and peace when, if you really dare open your eyes, you see the reality of the place you sought to die for. Death, suffering, pain and destruction fill the streets. The people are crying out but all you can do is offer them love? Love? Are you mad? What good is love to a child starving on a street corner? What good is love to a man lying in a pool of his own blood? Don't talk to me about love. Love is the most destructive force imaginable yet it is what you would give those in pain? Who is the cruel, psychotic one now, you hypocrites?
It starts of slowly, this so called "Descent into Darkness". You feel irritated by someone. You begin to obsess over their faults until your mild irritation becomes full-blown hate. Every single breathe they take makes you physically hurt. Why are they still living, you ask yourself, Why haven't they died yet? The voice becomes louder and more pronounced. It tells you what they are really thinking behind the stupid little facades they erect to hide their true natures. You can see them as plainly as you can see the rats infest the streets. Nothing can hide the fact that they are vermin. Vermin need to be exterminated.
The anger turns consumes you. You want to ignore it but you can't. Every single thing that person does makes you want to take them and kill them swiftly, just to better humanity. The world would be a better place without them, you delude yourself, the world would never miss a rat like them. Suddenly, the anger turns into rage. You find yourself acting out at anyone and everyone who chances a look at you. Then you see it.
The disgusting pity in their eyes. They claim to only want to help you yet you know that the only thing they really want is to benefit themselves from your fall. Their pity enrages you further, it pushes you so far of the line you just want to scream at them! You just want to hurt them! You just want to make them suffer as much as you are hurting! Who are they but insignificant little animals? Would anyone miss a cow if it fell to your feet? Why should their lives matter? Suddenly, the anger takes control. One by one, they fall to your feet. They don't deserve to live. They don't understand what is happening. It's survival of the fittest.
What happens when you cross the line and you are so far gone you cannot look back? Nothing. You feel wonderful. No more eyes filled with fake sympathy, no more irritating little animals. You are the survivor. You are the fittest. Their fates lay in their own hands, not yours, despite the fact you can no longer rub the blood from your nails.
The power washes over you and you know that nothing will stop you. Nothing can ever stop you. All you can feel is the corruption of your soul. Where has the child gone? The child who smiled at cats and dogs? The child who was fascinated by rainbows and daffodils? You are above such trivial matters of childhood innocence as you slowly become something greater than has ever been seen before. You can hear the small child cry out for something that resembles sanity but you ignore them. What does a child know of sanity? A child cannot comprehend the forces acting on you now. A child cannot understand the glory and the power which lay softly by your feet.
You are gone. Hollow. A shell of what you once were but at least you have the power you have always craved. At least you have reached your goals. The only aspect of yourself you have lost is weakness. Only weakness. Who misses a weakness?
It ends. You are gone. Nothing matters.
Get out.
Get out.
Get out...
It's too late. I'm so far gone I cannot even remember the truth. I cannot remember love. I cannot remember lies. I am nothing.