The young man stared blankly at his lover wrapped in soft moist sheets. The silk sheets bothered squall..they were..too soft. Soft enough to remind him of her skin, her..forbidden skin. Squall stared up into the celing and exhaled.
He couldn't lie to himself..it wasn't the sheets that were getting to him, it was the fact that he had layed with her in Balamb.
Not just Balamb but in Balamb hotel, once where he had stared out the window secretley praying for a dream. His whole life, was nothing but dark hidden secrets that he never wantedto be unlocked.
However,she..she had a way, she held his hearts key. He turned to look upon her and gently carssed her arm. Her soul reached out to him and for the first time in his life he let his feelings run free.
He exposed all his hate,anger and all..all of his..love to her. Squall turned his body away from her and looked out the same window that haunted him.
Balamb had never seemed more distrubing. Something..bothered him, the seas were rough and the sun kept dimming faster, hiding its rays.
He got out of the bed and put on simple white shirt and shorts, Not his normal uniform but today..felt diffrent. His footprints made a soft thud on the ground as he walked toward the window and a soft breeze cooled his face. He leaned his body out the window and inhaled the breeze. "What a day.." squall murrmered. He ran his fingers through the cracks, feeling the tough grains of sand grind between his fingers.
The thought entered his mind again..what was he doing here with her? Squall hung his head low and inhaled another breath.
"if..i could take it i?" Turning to gaze on her beauty he admired her simplicty more and more.
She lay naked in the bed with nothing but the silk sheets covering her olive skin. Her dark,long raven hair spilled messy across her face.
The sweat had made soft curls sweep across her face, sticking to her fair skin. Squall smilied a bit, he found it arousing to see her sweat from their love.
Her lips were cherry and warm with a taste of cinnamon. Something squall loved for every time he kissed her,the taste engluffed his mouth making him urge for more. Her eyes green and vibrant, glowing every moment she smiled. Not one imperfection on her body except for the small star shapped scar on her stomach.
"What the hell did she get it from?" He thought. She suddenly turned in bed exposing her scar. Squall squinted his eyes and tried to study it more. "Would..would i wake her if i looked at it?" He ruffled his hair and slowly walked over to her resting body. He moved his hands over it and cringed. "It looks so weird.." and before another thought entered his mind he began poking it.
"Man..it's such a deep scar. It looks like it would've hurt alot.". Suddnley a gentle hand grabbed his face surprising him. "Are you poking me?!" a playful voice exlaimed and Before he realized he had woken her, she leaped up and wrapped her arms around his sholders. "Poke poke poke..telling me to get up?" she clutched onto his chin and pulled him in to her kiss. Slowly she brought his body down and clung onto his back. She arched her back into to hold herslef up and cling onto him tighter."Her body..it's so... warm" Squall thought as he settled from the shock and his hands searhced her body. He felt like a teenager getting his first kiss, so eager, yet still..so..embarrassed.
He realsed from the kiss to find his lover in tears. Quickly squall wiped them away and pulled her into his chest. "What? what is it? was i..did..did i hurt you? are you..are you in pain? whats wro.." Her silent sobs became loud roars of pain and sorrow.
She let the tears flow from her eyes down her body brushing her breasts. Squall despretly carassed her face, it was so sudden, her tears had he hurt her eairler? "Please...please tell me..I..god..i didnt did i?" he stared at her fragile body thinking what a monster he was to hurt her.
"No..no it's not that" she gasped. She wiped her tears and threw her body next to squalls again, feeling his heartbeat and breathing his scent. "he smells so comforting..he feels " the lover thought to herself.
She rested her head onto his shoulder and let tears flow onto him and closed her eyes. Squall gently rubbed her back as he tried to soothe his love. Making coo's and sounds he would have to a baby he kissed the top of her head. Slowly..she opened her eyes again to see that The room was so cold and grey. The sun had then hidden it's rays completley and rain was falling down hard.
She embraced him tighter and whisperd "it's just..i know..that..that after we get dressed and leave.." she broke into sobs again but tried to regain her strength.
"Squall..its just that..we can never be..be..together after this. we..god" she burried her head deeper into his shoulder.."why must we hide it? Hide our love..Why????" her nails dug into his back and she sobbed louder.
Her tear filled eyes looked up at her lover face. Why..was he not responding? Why was he not comforting her? She collected herself and combed her fingers through her hair. Pushing away from him she leaned against the bed post and exhaled. Closing her eyes once more she took another deep breath and ruffled squalls hair.
She curled up her knees and placed her head inbetween them. Wiping away the last of her tears she whispered,"Im sorry for..for bringing it up. I'm being selfish. I..I know why and..im sorry..squall?"
She latched her hands on his knees staring into his face. Asking again she whispered "squall?" He brushed her hands aside and ran again to the window.
He had no where else to go..to leave in his current clothes, people would know why he went up here with her. To dress and leave her here..he couldn't. He was just..so damn..angry. "She knows why..why bring it up here..why not back at dollet or something?"
He tilted his head onto the side of the window. "raindrops..great.." Squall thought crossly. He hated it when it rained, it made him hate eveything more.
Squall turned around and faced his lover once again. Dropping his head and exhaling he mutterd "You know why...why..i can't love you." Squall brought his face to look at her again.
She scrunched up her blankets and tears formed in her eyes again. "Im so foolish.." she thought. "this is so.....god..why..what..is this feeling. Why can't i leave him..I..i.." Soon her mild manner became outraged and she quickly got out of the bed.
She felt expossed and dirty standing there naked in front of him and quickly found her clothes. As She headed toward the bathroom she muttered, "Cold heartless asshole." Her thoughts raced and only rage could fill her.
"...whatever.." squall exhaled and began searching for his clothles. As he dressed he thought about her,"Women..they're so...strage." He changed and glanced in the mirror. What did she find attractive in him? He studied himself,and as he felt his face he threw he his hand down in disgust. "what the hell am i doing? Guys..dont..study themselves" he looked again at the mirror but this time dusgustingly. "Only irvine does for his pickup lines" squall walked away with a smirk on his face. Irvine was his friend but he was stupid. Trying to remember all the times him and selphie had fought anout irvine and his flirtatios ways, he soon lost count. With another grin on his face squall thought, "he may be an idiot but..i really think he loves her" squall reached under the bed for his gunblade. As he pulled it out and secured it in his belt he looked toward the bathroom.
Was this..this..love?..dodging people and secretley having sex..love? He shook his head and tightend his gunblade. No, he had felt love before...this was something stronger. He couldn't ditch her no matter what. Squall sat on the bed and clucthed one of the pillows.
Thinking about all the times he had tried to leave her, tried to tell her it was over his grip on the pillow became stronger, alomst till it hurt.
Suddenly she emerged from the bathroom wearing her normal attire. Her curls combed straight pulled into a messy bun on her head. Dangling diamond earings shaking with her every move.
A tight royal blue button down shirt with a pair of nice slender black pants, she had put on the necklace too.
Squall loved that necklace, so intricate in the deisgn. It was a mass of pure gold lines forming into a shining ball. It looked like a tiny lock of some sort, but the way he messed with it while she would sleep brought another grin on his face.
Gathering items around the room and trying to fix it up she paced back and forth through the room. Squall sat there and just stared blankly. "Um..do you need help?" he playfully said.She took one more glance into the mirror and exhaled. "Ok..whatever..are you ready to go?" her face looked anxious and still raged.
Squall rolled his eyes and walked to embrace her. He quickly grabbed her waist and gently kissed her cheek. "Yes..Princess Amara" He grasped her chin and brought it to his lips. Amara pushed away and bluntly said, "We better hurry...Rinoa is waiting for you"