Demon King: Hello! I'm so sorry that I haven't updated in like . . . half a year . . . sowwie. ((Sweat drops)) My life has been very hectic lately!
Kish: Oh, yes! Very hectic! Playing videogames, drawing manga, eating Pocky and watching anime. Yup, that's hectic alright! ((Sarcasm))
DK: n.n;;; Um . . . On to the fanfic!
Disclaimer: I don't own it, so leave me alone, 'kay?
Doggy Daycare! (TMM Style!)
(Part Two)
The sun was still warm and bright as ever. Godzilla could have popped out of some random dimension portal thingy, ate two buildings and a tree but they wouldn't have cared. Kish was floating around happily, daydreaming about how he would ask Ichigo out for a date. Taruto was making faces at Kish when his back was turned and Pai was sweating bullets, staring at the little pink piece of paper, holding his head and trying to think of how the hell they were going to do all of this.
"Okay! I think I have a plan!" Pai announced with relief. Kish grumbled because his sweet, little daydream was being interrupted just at the good part. (No, not that good part, you perverts!) "Alright, this is my plan." Pai continued. "There are nine dogs and three of us, so we each take on three dogs." Kish and Taruto both gaped at Pai in disbelief. "What?" Pai said, confused. "It took you twenty minutes just to figger that out!" Kish yelled. "And they call you the smart one! Ha!" Pai turned red, embarrassed. "Well, excuse me!" He hollered back. His lips were twisted, his gut tight from the anxiety. "If you haven't noticed, I'm under pressure here! It's not like I'm really thrilled that we have to take care of these things!" "They're 'dogs' not 'things.'" Kish taunted, pushing Pai's buttons further. "AUGH! WHATEVER!" The two of them continued to bicker until Taruto screamed at them. "Shut up!" Ignoring Taruto, Kish turned and stared at the dogs, playing in the open field, and then turned to Pai with a smug look. "Okay, smart fart, since you have it all figgered out, they're out there, but how do we get them to come here?" "Wha-what did you just call me!" Pai snarled, outraged.
Pai was just about to strangle Kish but Taruto jumped in between them. "Cheese-la-wheeze, you guys! It's not that hard! Look, I'll show you!" Taruto said, with excitement in his voice. Kish and Pai both cocked an eyebrow and looked at him as if to say- "This, I have to see!" Taruto strode to the edge of the field and took a deep breath. "Hey! Hey, you dogs over there! Hey! Yoo-hoo! Hey! Come over here! Hello! HEY!" Taruto shrieked, waving his arms franticly above his head, looking like a complete idiot. Soon, Kish decided to join him –even though it looked totally useless- and started screaming and waving his arms in the air as well. The dogs just ignored them; they didn't even glance their way. It was bad enough to be pinned down by the odd looks that they were already getting from all the other people passing by, but now this! Pai stared at his comrades, a disgusted look on his face. "I'm surrounded by fools." He said, in an irritated tone, rolling his eyes. "Okay! Okay! Stand back and watch the pro!" Pai bellowed, pushing his way past Kish and Taruto. "Let me do this, you idiots!" "Oh yeah!" Kish hooted, "Like you know what to do!" "I do know what to do! I saw it on TV!" Pai 'hooted' back. Kish snorted. "Don't you know that TV isn't real?" "What channel?" Taruto asked. "The Discovery channel." Said Pai, with significance. Kish and Taruto bobbed their heads at same time. "Ahhh!" They said, in agreement. "Now, that's different!"
(DK: All hail the Discovery channel! Kish: ((bows)) All hail!)
Pai was full of himself now. With a quick gasp, he placed two fingers on his lips and blew. The result, that escaped his mouth, was a small puff of air and some drool, which was now starting to run down his fingers. '. . . Crap.' Pai thought, his face turning the colour of a cardinal. "What the hell was that!" Kish choked, holding his sides, trying keep his laughter down. "What do you think I was doing?" Pai said, his embarrassment turning into miffiness. "I was trying to whistle! Is that not how you call dogs?" Pai asked, raising a brow in Kish's direction. Kish shot his nose in the air and narrowed his eyes in annoyance. "I knew that!" Kish lied, like a child. Of course he was lying! He didn't know squat about dogs! Thank God, Ichigo wasn't here to see all of this! She'd probably think he was an idiot!
(DK: Dude, it doesn't matter! She already thinks you're an idiot! Kish: Oh, shuddup! Pai and Taruto: ((Snicker! Snicker!)) Kish: Damn you, all! Damn you all to hell!)
Trying to ignore Kish's mumbling about him not being an idiot, Taruto walked over to Pai's side. "What went wrong?" He asked, carefully eyeing the saliva on his comrade's hand. "I have no idea." Pai answered, wiping the drool onto his shirt "Let me try it again." With that, he placed the now clean fingers onto his lips and blew. The result . . . a high-pitched squeak and -yup, you guessed it- more drool. Kish and Taruto roared with laughter, as Pai turned a familiar shade of red. "You're nuts! That's never going to work!" Kish spoke between fits of chuckles. "Oh?" Pai whipped around to face Kish, his hands on his hips. "And I suppose Mr.I-know-everything-there-is-to-know-about-dogs knows another way? Hmm?" He sneered, lifting a brow while his lips pursed. Kish gulped under Pai's annoyed glare. 'Uh-oh!' Kish and Taruto both looked at him, then each other. Oh God, Pai has that look again! No one would dare to push him with that look on his face! It was the 'don't-mess-with-me-I-didn't-have-my-morning-cup-of-coffee-yet' look! Pai is the kind of person –excuse me, alien- who gets told, a lot, to take a pill! He's always so serious and is the lord of the 'stick-in-the-muds'. Plus the fact that, if you ever got him really annoyed, (like right now) I have four words for you. 'Run.For.The.Hills.'
Pai spoke, breaking the awkward silence. "Well, do you know another way? Hmm?" He leaned forward, putting a hand next to his ear, expecting an answer. "Okay, okay," Kish smirked, flicking the end of Pai's nose to make him back off. " Try your stupid idea one more time, but if it fails again, I have the right to call you nuts!" Taruto's eyes widened, surprised at Kish's actions. 'He's either very brave, or very stupid to try to push Pai's buttons even further . . . . . . Oh, wait, I already know the answer. He's stupid.' Taruto thought, holding his laughter in the back of his throat. "Humph. Fine then." Pai replied, rubbing his nose. He strode back to the edge of the field, trying to ignore Kish and Taruto's cocky grins. They knew what was coming - Another squeak and more drool!
'Okay, the first way didn't work, so try something different this time.' Pai thought to himself. 'Hmm, how did that other guy whistle on that T.V. show?' He put a hand to his chin, trying to remember. Finally, he lifted his head with a pleased look. 'I got it!' Pai glanced over his shoulder; looking at the two figures behind him with an arrogant laugh. "Watch this, you two, I'll show you the right way to call a dog!" Kish and Taruto put their hands on their hips and began to skip around in a circle. "Pai's goanna show us how! Pai's goanna show us how!" They sung, obviously mocking him. (All: Obviously.) Pai just ignored them and turned his attention on the dogs ahead. Taking in air with a quick gasp, he put his lips together and blew. The result was a loud, high-pitched whistle! (A bit squeaky, but a whistle none the less.) Kish and Taruto both gawked at him in pure disbelief. He actually did it! Pai beamed. He was totally proud of himself now. His triumphant grin dropped in a instant, replaced with wide eyes and a gaping mouth. ". . . Oh my." Pai croaked. "Pai? What's wrong?" Kish asked, peering over his friend's shoulder. "What're ya looking at?" He added as Taruto looked around him too. They all tensed at the sight before them.
It wasn't just the dogs that they were babysitting that were coming to them, like they expected, but all the dogs in the whole park were thundering towards them! All kinds of dogs! Big, small, fat and thin, with mouths open, tongues lashing, ears bouncing, tails wagging and all that kind of yucky canine stuff!
"Oh my god, we're going to be trampled to death!" Pai screamed, whirling around to face his comrades. Nothing. Nobody. His friends were nowhere to be seen. "What the-? Kish! Taruto!" Pai furiously looked for them, and then finally his eyes found them . . . . . in a tree. "What the hell are you two doing upthere!" He snarled, clutching his hands into fists. "What does it look like we're doin'! We're trying to save our asses!" Kish replied, holding on to his branch tighter. "And you left me here to- GAH!" Pai was cut off as the army of dogs tackled him to the ground, slobbering his face with doggie kisses. Kish and Taruto's eyes widened to the size of saucers. "NOOOO! We lost Pai!" Taruto wailed. "He was a great friend, I'll miss him so." Kish sniffled. "-nrrf- I'm not dead yet, you twits! –argh- Help me!" Pai yelled, trying to push through the fuzzy, hairy mass of dogs, gasping for air. The two aliens in the tree smile weakly. "Heh, heh, of course we knew you were okay . . . . Umm . .Oh! That's right, you need help!" Kish rambled, scrambling for ideas. "Um . . . Don't make eye contact!"
"Try not to sweat, they can smell fear!"
"Don't move! They can't see you if you're stay still!"
Kish and Taruto continued to yell out useless ideas, while Pai was drowning in a sea of dog slobber. When Taruto hollered to him to 'play dead', Pai, who was desperate at this point, decided to try all of the above . . . It was when a very, very, very big St. Bernard started to … well … to put it delicately, tried to get to 'second base' with him, that Pai began to screech in a way that could wake even Deep Blue-sama! "Arrrgh! Saaave meeee! It's not working!" Kish shouted down to his friend, worried for Pai's virginity, "Bark like a dog! Make them think that you are one of their own!" "Bark like a boy dog . . . make sure that it's like a boy dog!" Taruto added. Kish turned to Taruto and nodded. "Dude, good one!" …
To be continued …
(Readers: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooo ((pauses for breath)) OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooo!)
Demon King: Mwahahahahah! I love cliffies! ((grins evilly)) I told ya that it would get funnier in the next chapter! Was it funny or what, Kish? ((looks at Kish))
Kish: Huh? Oh, yeah, sure. ((yawns))
DK: OMG! What does it take to impress you people! ((rips out hair in frustration)) . . . ((gives Kish a dark look)) You wouldn't be acting bored for the sake of watching me go crazy, would you? Hmm?
Kish: Me? I would never do that to you! ((tries to look innocent ))
DK: -.-;;; ((looks at readers)) Sigh. Read and review, please. The more reviews, the faster I will update, okay? Good. ((goes off to tend to her bald spots))