The Truths of Love: Chapter four
Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon. Never have, never will, so please don't sue me.
Usagi was woken up the next morning by a soft chirping sound. Opening her eyes, she looked groggily at the window to see a bird sitting on the windowsill. She stretched languorously, and tensed when she felt a hard, warm object behind her, turning slowly, she looked into the ocean blue eyes of Mamoru Chiba, who was watching her with a small smile on his face.
"Morning, sleepy," he whispered softly.
Usagi turned a soft shade of red and quickly scrambled up in bed, pulling out of his arms.
"I...I'm sorry I asked you to sleep in here. I couldn't..." her voice trailed off, and she looked away, visions from the nightmare of last night filling her head, causing her to shiver. She wrapped her arms around her body and stood, walking over to the window, looking down at the already busy streets of Tokyo.
Walking over to the clothes chests, she looked at the clock and found that it was 11:30.
"Ah, Mamoru, aren't you later for work?" Usagi asked quietly. She knew that Mamoru had finally gotten the job of his dreams: He was a doctor at the Tokyo Hospital, and he loved every moment of his job. He wouldn't ever dream of being late for it.
But today, he was late. He should have been at the hospital at 7:30 am, and right now it was 11:30.
Mamoru shook his head. "No, Usagi. I called in, and I'm not working today or tomorrow. No, I have much more important things... or a much more important thing...in my life right now."
Usagi looked up, curious. After all, what could possibly be more important to Mamoru than his job as a doctor?
"Oh?" She asked. "And what would that be, if I might inquire...?"
Mamoru smiled softly. "To make sure you get better. I can't take the risk of leaving you here by yourself. Usagi..." He began softly. "Tell me what happened. What has you acting like this? Please, let me help you."
Usagi looked away, her face suddenly turning somber. "I can't..." she whispered softly. "Please, Mamoru, don't ask me to tell it. Not yet. It's too soon." She turned to him, the look in her eyes pleading for him to understand. "Some day I will tell you what happened. But not yet." With that she looked away again.
Mamoru looked down. He couldn't understand this girl. No, he couldn't understand what had changed her. What could have turned this bright, bubbly, vibrant young girl into this... shadow? With a sigh, he shook his head and stood up.
"Alright, Usagi. I respect your wishes. But promise me... when you are ready to talk, please come to me. I'll be here for you, no matter what. And know this." His voice grew hard, the look in his eyes one to chill the blood of anyone they were directed at. "Whoever did this to you will pay dearly. And whoever it was will not get to you again. I promise you that."
Usagi looked up. The intensity in Mamoru's voice frightened her. She looked away with a murmured thank you.
"I'll go make breakfast. Is there anything in particular you want?" Mamoru asked her, the edge in his voice gone.
Usagi shook her head slightly. "Whatever you make will be fine... so long as it's not too fattening..." She looked down at her slim waist with a frown, and muttered softly, "He says I'm fat..."
Mamoru's eyebrows raised in shock. "You...? Fat...? What kind of moron would say that? And more importantly, how could you believe it?"
Usagi looked up at Mamoru, her eyes bright with emotional pain, and she turned away, once more wrapping her arms around herself. "It doesn't matter. He was right, I AM getting fat. I think I'll just skip breakfast, Mamoru. But thank you anyways."
"Oh no you won't, Usagi. You are eating breakfast if it means I have to shove the food down your throat." He smiled to take the sting out of his words.
"But I'm not hung--" At that moment Usagi's stomach rumbled, proving the lie in her words. "Alright," she conceded. "But only a little bit."
Mamoru smiled and nodded, and went to his kitchen, preparing the breakfast. Half an hour later, the smells of all different kinds of food came wafting down the hall and into the bedroom where Usagi was. Her eyes closed, and she lifted her nose to the air, sniffing, taking in each delicious scent. Opening her eyes, she walked out of the bedroom, down the hall and into the kitchen.
Once there, her eyes widened in shock. For on the table was a feast fit for kings and queens. Pancakes of all varieties, ranging from buttermilk to blueberry, with everything else in between, cooked to perfection, both sides a golden brown. Fresh fruits were piled high on a plate, from the normal everyday apples, bananas and strawberries to the exotic kiwi and star fruit. All kinds of cereals were placed out on the table, and milk ranging from skim to 2 percent was set out as well. Juices of all kinds were spread out for her selection, orange juice, apple juice, grape juice, pineapple juice, and papaya juice, each in separate containers. On the opposite end of the table were waffles, again ranging from the normal Belgium and buttermilk to blueberry and strawberry. There was porridge, steam rolling off of it softly, and blueberry muffins on a tray, freshly baked. Crispy bacon and freshly cooked eggs were on a separate plate, and hash browns and sausages on still another. And to top it all off, in the very center of the table were English muffins and croissants, buttered and ready to eat.
"Dig in," Mamoru said as they both sat down at the table.
Usagi's mouth watered and it was all she could do not to take some of everything. Instead, she took only a few pieces of fruit and set them on her plate, and set about eating them slowly. After a few bites, a knock came at the door of the apartment, and Usagi froze, dropping the piece of fruit that was in her hand.
"He's found me!" She cried softly, and standing up, she ran down the hall and into the bedroom, closing and locking the door before Mamoru could so much as say a word.
Mamoru watched her departure sadly, knowing he couldn't have prevented her from running even if he had tried. With a sigh, Mamoru stood, walking to the door and pulling it open. Outside stood Ami and Minako.
"Where is she?" Minako asked as she walked right into the room, going underneath Mamoru's arm in order to get in. "Can we talk to her now?"
Mamoru sighed and scrubbed a hand through his hair. "She's in the bedroom. We were eating breakfast, and as soon as the knock came, she bolted. I don't know if you'll be able to talk to her or not, but she is awake, so you might as well try."
Ami laid a hand on Mamoru's shoulder for a minute and smiled, her eyes sad. "Thank you for all you have done. If you want to go to the hospital to work for a few hours, we'll stay with Usagi."
Mamoru hesitated, torn between going to the work he loved, and staying with the girl who he felt oddly protective of. Making up his mind, he shook his head.
"No," he said. "I'll stay with her. I already told the hospital I won't be there today or tomorrow, so I'm going to stay with her."Ami nodded her head and took her hand off of his shoulder, and with Minako walked to the bedroom door.
Knocking softly on the door, Ami said, "Usagi, its Ami and Minako. Can we talk to you?"
Usagi was lying face down on the bed, her whole body tense, when the knock on the bedroom door came. Pulling a pillow to her face, she muffled a scream, knowing that he finally found her, and that he would take her back.
"Usagi, its Ami and Minako. Can we talk to you?" Came a soft voice from the other side of the door. Usagi sat up, her eyes wide.
"G-girls?" She uttered softly under her breath, and quickly she walked to the door, unlocking it and opening it just slightly, just enough to see the worried faces of two of her best friends.
She quickly shut the door again, walking back to her bed and laying on her side, muttering curses under her breath.
"He lied to me... Mamoru lied to me... he promised he wouldn't call the girls and tell them I'm here, but he did... he lied to me..." Tears came to her eyes as she muttered to herself over and over, not even noticing as the door opened and Minako and Ami walked into the room. However, the next thing she knew, Ami was holding her hand and whispering quietly into her ear as Usagi rocked back and forth, sobs racking her body.
"No, my dear. Mamoru kept his promise to you. He didn't tell us you were here, Motoki did. Mamoru called Motoki to ask what he should do for a friend, and Motoki figured out that the friend was Mamoru himself. He told us, and we came to see you," Ami explained softly, stroking Usagi's hair softly, holding Usagi's shaking form to herself.
Minako stood awkwardly by the door, not saying a word, just watching as Ami soothed their distraught friend. After a few minutes of standing by the door, Minako walked over to the bed and sat on the other side of Usagi, gently running her fingers through the girl's dirty, tangled hair.
"Usagi, what happened?" Minako asked quietly after the girl had calmed down. "Where have you been for the past two months, and where did you get all of these bruises?"
Usagi looked away from her two friends, trying to pull her emotions back together before she began the story that she couldn't tell Mamoru yet.
"I was... with Matt," she began quietly. "He was perfect. Everything I could want. He helped me get through the death of my family... he helped me with difficult cases at work. That's how I met him, you know. At work. He came to get an application to work for us, and I interviewed him there and then. He was perfect for the job, and his background was clean. We started dating that night. He took me out for a celebratory dinner on him getting the job. Everything was perfect for about a month. He was wonderful to me." Usagi smiled wistfully, pausing to gather her thoughts together. "And then... he changed." She went on to tell them how he started calling her fat, how he told her that the girls she called her friends only tolerated her because they pitied the fact that she had no one else in the world. At that point Minako stood up, her hands clenched into fists, and hissed under her breath.
"He is so going to pay," she began, but was stopped from saying anything more by Usagi.
"Please," she said quietly. "Let me finish... I don't think I'll be able to finish it if I'm cut off now..."
Minako nodded and sat down reluctantly as Usagi continued.
"And then one day, something happened. He hit me one day. We were sitting at his house, having dinner, and when he asked me how the food was, and I said it was good, he hit me. He hit me because I didn't say it was great. I was shocked that he would do such a thing, and after a moment he apologized and told me he would never do it again. And for the rest of the night, we had fun, and true to his word, he didn't raise a hand against me. But the next night, he hit me again, and bruised me on my arms. At that point I went to Mamoru and asked him if Matt had ever been known to beat his girlfriends before, because he was hitting me. Mamoru... he didn't believe me. He told me I was probably exaggerating. I couldn't show him the bruises after he said that, and so I left. That night..."
She took a deep breath. "That night, Matt came to me after we went out for dinner. He began to... to hit me, and kick me. He called me names, telling me I was a worthless... a worthless bitch." Her breath caught as she remembered that night in perfect detail. "He knocked me to the floor and then..." She went on to tell the two girls how he'd dragged her to his bedroom and raped her. Through the entire thing, the girls sat in shocked silence, unable to believe what they were hearing, and yet knowing it was the truth.
After a few minutes of silence, broken only by the occasional sniffle, Usagi continued.
"I ran away then. After he had... finished... I ran away. I grabbed my clothes and ran before he could get up. I kept running and running, and came to the Tokyo park. That's where Mamoru found me, and I've been with him ever since."
Her voice trailed off. "I couldn't call you. I couldn't tell you what had happened, or where I was, because I didn't want to be a bigger burden on you than I already am. I'm sorry you found out the way you did; I didn't want you to find out at all. And now you know what happened, and where I've been. I'm sorry I didn't contact you before, but I just... I couldn't." Finally her story was over, and she lay down on the bed and sobbed softly into the pillows.
Minako and Ami caught each other's eyes over the girl's head, and sighed softly, each laying a hand on Usagi's shoulder.
"Usagi," Minako began, "You've never been a burden on us. Never. Rei, Ami, Makoto and I love you. You're an incredible person, and we wouldn't even all be together if it weren't for you. You brought us out of our shells, and brought us all together. How could you forget that?"
Ami nodded slightly. "That's right, Usagi. You brought our group together. If it weren't for you, we wouldn't even know each other. Usagi, whatever your faults are, your strengths more than make up for them. Never let anyone tell you we don't love you, or need you. Because that is just plain rubbish."
Usagi looked up, tears still running down her cheeks, and managed to get out, "R-really? You guys... really think that way?"
Her voice was so soft, so timid, that Ami and Minako couldn't help but smiling.
"Of course, Usagi-chan. Do you have any idea how worried we've been about you? And Rei nearly threw a fit when we couldn't find you anywhere," Minako said with a laugh.
Usagi groaned good naturedly. "Rei-chan... I missed her. Her and her teasing." She rolled her eyes as the other girls laughed.
Minako wrapped her arms around Usagi, holding her close, and then pulled Ami into the hug as well. "Oh you guys, group hug."
Usagi laughed softly and hiccupped, a few stray tears running down her cheeks before finally stopping.
"So, Usagi? Are you going to come with us now?"
A momentary panic overcame Usagi, and she shook her head frantically. "I can't. He'll find me with one of you guys and..." Her voice trailed off as she remembered the dream she had, where every one of her friends had been killed by Matt. "No... I can't come with you..." Her eyes filled with tears of anguish and she looked away.
Ami placed a hand softly on her shoulder, squeezing gently to say she understood.
Usagi looked up at the blue haired girl gratefully and leaned back down on the bed, closing her eyes, her body drained emotionally from having told the story.
"Hey you guys? Please... don't tell Mamoru what happened... I'll tell him in good time, I promise. Just... not yet."
Ami and Minako hesitated, but respecting her wishes, they nodded, and turned to go, both realizing just how much effort and courage it took for Usagi to tell them what had happened.
Usagi's voice spoke up again, quietly. "And you guys?"
"Yes, Usagi?" Ami said softly.
There was a soft yawn, and then a pause, and they turned to go once more, when her voice came up, slurred and almost unintelligible.
"Thank you... for everything..." With that said, Usagi drifted off to sleep, and Ami and Minako left the room, quietly shutting the door behind them.
Mamoru sat in his den as the girls talked with Usagi. Every so often he'd check his watch, and he sighed when he realized that just about two hours had passed. He was about to go and make a cup of coffee to help calm his nerves when the door to the bedroom opened and Minako and Ami filed out quietly.
"Well?" Mamoru asked anxiously. "Is she okay? What happened? Please, tell me anything you can!"
Minako and Ami exchanged significant looks, and then Minako faced Mamoru once more.
"Mamoru, I'm sorry. Despite all you have done to help and care for Usagi, it's her story to tell, not ours. However, she promised that one day, she will tell you what happened to her. But not now. I'm sorry I can't tell you more than that, but I can't. She's sleeping now, and she will for a few hours, I think. Thank you for letting us talk to her. Makoto and Rei wish to come tomorrow, if that's alright with you...?"
Mamoru nodded his head distractedly, and bid the girls a good day. Once they were gone, he went to the bedroom, and for a time just stood right inside the bedroom looking at the form of the girl sleeping on his bed.
'She looks just like an angel,' he found himself thinking, and then shook his head. 'No, it's Usagi. You're her friend, remember?' He told himself.
'Ah, but is that all you want to be?' A voice in his mind asked him.
'Well, no,' he conceded, 'but it's all she wants from me.'
'Or is it?' that same voice asked him.
Mamoru frowned and quickly hushed the voice before it could confuse him further. Walking over to the edge of the bed, he sat beside the blonde haired girl, and took one of her hands in his own.
'She's so small... so frail,' he thought to himself. 'I want to protect her, to keep her from any and all harm that might possibly even think to touch her.'
With her hand in his, he lightly rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand, smiling idly and watching her sleep. Lying down beside her, he closed his eyes and slowly fell asleep, her hand still held tightly in his.
Later that night, Usagi roused herself to find Mamoru sleeping beside her. A small smile spread over her face, and she reached out to push a piece of his ebon colored hair out of his face, and then she sat and watched him sleep for awhile. He looked just like a child as he slept, so cute and innocent... Leaning down, she brushed a soft kiss on his forehead and then pulled her hand from his, standing up and heading out to the kitchen to make a light dinner.
As she made a small turkey sandwich, she thought over the years she had known Mamoru, and of the times they'd spent together, of the laughs and cries they'd had together. She'd always thought of him as an older brother, as a companion that she would be able to share anything with. He was her protector, and she loved him for it. But she wouldn't dwell on the thought of loving him.
After eating the turkey sandwich and having a small glass of water, she washed her dishes and put them away before heading back to the bedroom. Once there, she climbed into the bed, careful not to wake Mamoru, closed her eyes, softly snuggled up to him, and went back to sleep.