Ponyboy and I walked back to our seats from the concession stand we were just at. I guess it was a concession stand; it wasn't like it was at the movies or anything but they sold popcorn and Pepsi there. Our seats might have gotten taken, because already it was getting busier. It tended to get busier at nighttime since lots of drunken hicks, and cowboys stopped here for a good time after they get kicked out of the bars.
"Ponyboy! Johnny! Come here guys!" Sodapop yelled, standing by the crowded side board. Me and Ponyboy walked over, pushing our way through the crowd to be up with Soda.
Dally was darting back and forth on a dark brown and white horse. Buck Merril was his racing partner like always and was already ready on his horse.
Dally was winning and I never see him more happy and less violent than when he's winning a race. When he was done he got off his horse yelling at random people. I could hear Ponyboy and Sodapop cheering him on beside me. They sounded the same now though so I couldn't tell which one was which. I smiled at Ponyboy and he swung an arm around my shoulders as he hollered and cheered.
Dallas was walking around sucking up the glory for winning the race. He was grinning cockily at the guy, and he leaned over the boards kissing a barely-dressed girl.
Sodapop lead us out away from the boards.
"I wish I could go back in the race, I miss that man." Sodapop said, admiring the people riding around on horses.
"I thought you was racing Soda." Ponyboy said looking at him with a questioning look.
"Yeah, I mean, I was thinking about it but it just didn't seem right since dad didn't want me to with my leg and everything..." Sodapop said trailing off.
"I guess..." Ponyboy said, and made a sniffling noise. I turned quickly to look at him because for a sec I thought he was bawling. But he wasn't, he would never cry out in public. I hadn't known that their pop didn't want him to race anymore. To tell you the truth I thought he was just scared to. He pulled a muscle or something but he really slammed into the boards. Their dad did get pretty mad but I left with Two-Bit before anything really happened I guess.
"Where's Sandy?" Ponyboy yelled over all the noise.
"Here somewhere." Sodapop said looking behind him like he thought maybe she'd be standing there.
Ponyboy snorted. "You know if you don't go and look for her she'll get mad." He stated. Its funny, Ponyboy may have not ever had a real girlfriend but he knew more about them then any of us.
Too bad Steve wasn't nicer to Ponyboy, maybe he could hold onto a girlfriend if he was.
"Well then let's go huntin for her" Soda smiled and Pony and I followed behind him as we weaved through the noisy crowd.
When we found Sandy she was standing with two of her friends and it looked like their boyfriends.
Soda tapped her on the shoulder and she turned around quickly. Her blonde hair fell in her eyes and she threw it behind her shoulder. She raised an eyebrow.
"Do I know you?" She looked like she wanted to smile, because something was tugging at the corners of her girly lips. She wouldn't smile though; Soda would think she wasn't mad at all.
"Sandy! I aint even been here ten minutes!" He said walking up to her, trying to wrap his arms around her waist. She pushed him away by his upper arms.
"You liar, I saw you with Dallas almost two hours ago!" She frowned and chewed on her bottom lip.
Sodapop's face fell, and then he smiled and kind of shrugged.
"I'm sorry." He said it kind of like he asking. He took her hands in his and he pressed up against her, kissing her.
She pressed her lips together tightly and grinned, her teeth making an appearance. Sandy was the type of girl I'd be happy to have. She wasn't snobby at all and was gorgeous.
I hope when I have a girlfriend we don't have stupid fights like those, where it just seems like it's a waste of breath because you're going to make up in a few minutes. But maybe when I actually have a girlfriend I won't think of those fights like that...
Then as if to purposefully break us out of the trance we held over the couple in front of us Two-Bit grabbed me and Ponyboy by our collars and pulled us forcefully down towards the ground. I grabbed a hold of some guy's jacket and steadied myself before falling. I turned to see Ponyboy trying to sit up with Two-bit kneeling on his chest.
"All hail Two-Bit!"
Ponyboy shoved Two-Bit off of him frowning. I kind of laughed, its funnier when Two-Bits mortally embarrassing someone else, which he has a knack for.
"...all hail the moron..." Ponyboy mumbled under his breath, wiping the dirt off his sleeves.
"Come sit with me boys." Two-Bit smiled and jerked his thumb towards the bleachers where four girls sat smiling at us. Ponyboy groaned and I sighed as we followed Two-Bit. Two-Bit usually made us talk to girls who were clingy and loud and usually...drunk. If he wasn't drunk himself I think he'd know better than to make me talk to girls like that...but his judgments impaired.
Me and Ponyboy sat down beside each other and girls sat on either side of us.
"Hi" The girl said who was sitting beside Pony. She was kind of pretty; probably not the kind of girl Pon would go for though.
"Hi." Pony said back shyly. He was deathly shy of girls, I mean I didn't talk to them much either. Especially not since Steve and Dally scared the crap out of me by telling me stories about Sylvia and trash like that. But Pony, he got all red over everything.
"How old are you?" The girl said from beside me. I turned to look at her and was caught of guard. I was surprised to see that she was actually really decent looking. Who am I kidding, she was hot. She twirled her natural blonde hair in her fingers and did that thing they do with their eyelashes.
"15" I said looking down quickly, hoping she wouldn't make me say it again.
"I'm turning 15 in two months." She smiled and moved closer to me. I looked down and sipped my pop.
"What's your name?" she asked me, her big wide blue eyes were really focused one me. I looked down again. This girl didn't seem like the girls that the guys talked about all the time. She seemed nice, kind of innocent to me. Her blonde hair was really shiny and she didn't have those dark roots. I didn't really know her or why she was talking to me, but it was kind of nice. She wasn't as pushy as the guys always were, trying to get me to talk. She let me think stuff over. But she might be drunk; girls don't usually pick me over Ponyboy. But what did I know?
She poked me and I jumped and looked at her.
"Your name?" She smiled and took a sip from my coke.
"Oh." I said looking down at the pop she was sipping. "Johnny."
"My name is Lisa." She smiled and for the first time since we talked I smiled back.
I wondered how Ponyboy was doing. He was probably trying his best to shrug her off without being mean. The girl was looking at Ponyboy and he was looking down and smiling, going kind of red. I think she was complimenting him or something.
"I love your hair." She said with a giggle. She reached up and touched it and Ponyboy looked over at me raising his eyebrows and smiling.
"This is Gina." Ponyboy said leaning back so I could see her. I nodded and she smiled really big. She had a nice smile. Her hair was brown, dark brown and straight with bangs.
"Lisa." I said leaning back and kind of smiling. She waved and handed me back my pop.
Two-Bit sat down behind us.
"Here you go." He said handing Lisa a paper bag...with a drink inside. I watched as she took a swig.
She widened her eyes looking at me, probably because I looked scared or something.
"Did you want any?" She asked slowly moving the bottle towards me.
"Naw, Johnny doesn't drink." Two-Bit said, "But I do, and I deserve someone, seeing as I went through hell to get you that." He laughed and took a long drink; I watched his Adams Apple bob as it went down.
I looked over to see if Pony was upset at all that they were drunk.
Gina was playing with his hair again. He grabbed her wrist and smiled at her. She giggled and leaned into kiss him.
He has no clue she's drunk, I thought watching them make-out. I wished I didn't, and then I wouldn't have to think about it. He was lucky.
"Hey look at Pony!" Two-Bit yelled poking me and pointing towards Ponyboy and Gina.
"I know Two-Bit, I'm looking too!" I snapped. He laughed and walked away, probably going to tell all the boys.
"Aw" Lisa said, with the bottle in her hand. I smiled; Pony probably wouldn't care even if he did know they were drunk. I do though, that's how messed up I am. Its my dads fault... I don't know how to explain it but that's got to be why I'm so screwed up.
I mean, look, I have this pretty girl who's sitting beside me, trying to talk to me. She likes me. And all I can think about is that she's drunk. Who cares? I mean the boys get drunk all the time right?
I'll look over at her now all embarrassed, I thought turning my head. Then she'll smiled and wonder why she chose me over Ponyboy since I'm so shy and then-
My eyes closed instantly as she pressed her lips to mine. I felt her lips fall open and she put her hand on the back of my head.
And as much as I wanted to not think about stupid stuff, the only thing that went through my head when we kissed was...
What a waste of a first kiss...
---------------------------------------------------
I stared out the window as we drove home. The boys had all heard about me and Ponyboy with the girls. She had given me her phone number. I don't think I'll call her. She wouldn't want to talk to me if she wasn't drunk.
The boys had all slapped me on the back, 'Good job buddy!' 'Nice one they were hot!' They all said to me. I only grinned and nodded. 'How far did it go?' Two-Bit asked drunkenly slurring his words together. Ponyboy and I just blushed not answering. It didn't go farther than kissing...at least not for me.
Two-Bit was now in the pickup part, passed out cold. The gang would turn around every once in a while laughing as he slid across the floor. Steve laughed the hardest as he slammed into the side and woke up for a few minutes stunned.
There was another guy back there that was staying at Two-Bits because he got kicked out. Two-Bit was pretty stupid just taking some random hood home, but whatever. Dally had gone to a Buck's for the night. So it was now Pony, Soda and I in the back, with Steve and Darryl in the front. Darry was driving of course because he was the least drunk.
We dropped Two-Bit and the guy off, literally Two-Bit on the front lawn for the other guy to haul him in.
"Are you coming to our house again tonight Johnny?" Darryl asked looking up in the rear view mirror.
I thought about how nice it would be not to worry about my parents fighting downstairs. Not have to lean against my door, until I was too tired to stand, just in case they tried to come in. But I didn't want to make them think I thought I lived there or something so I told them to take me home.
"I'll go home." I said quietly and Ponyboy looked over at me in the back seat. He grinned kinda sadly. I just looked back and waved as I got out of the car.
I walked up the steps and sat on my porch for a smoke.
I wonder if I would have wanted to kiss that girl even if she wasn't drunk. Probably not. I always think that I would have but the truth is I'm just a pansy.
I would have kissed Jackie. Definitely.
Why do I have to keep thinking about her?! Her of all people, she doesn't even know my name or who I am. Why do I want her so badly?
I want her so bad it's kind of like this little ache in my chest. Every time I think about her and see her. Just knowing that I won't get to kiss her or hold her tomorrow...or even ever hurts so bad.
It kind of makes me think I'm in love with her. But that's impossible. I've never even had a conversation with her. I've never spent the day with her or kissed her or ugh...
That's crazy.
I hadn't heard any fighting yet, but I could never be sure. One of them just might be knocked out for now.
I opened the door quietly and darted up the stairs. I ran into my room and shut the door, collapsing onto my bed.
I never thought I'd see the day when girls made my head hurt so much.