Chapter 8

Draco grunted to himself. He entered their common room and sat himself down to a beach chair. The theme had changed again but he was used to it now.

Just as he came, Hermione left her room shakily and holding onto the walls for support.

"Potter! You're not supposed to be out of your room! Get back in there!" he shouted.

She took one look at him and fainted on the floor.

He sighed and came closer to her. He carried her bridal style and laid her back on her bed. He went in her bathroom and got a hand towel and some warm water.

He wet the towel and placed it on her forehead. He began to get up and leave when a dainty hand held on to his wrist.

He looked at Hermione and she had her eyes a little open. She mumbled a soft,

"Don't do this just for me."

To him and fainted again.

He left and a bright light appeared in Hermione's room illuminating most of it. But it disappeared as Hermione's eyes flickered open and closed again.

The next morning Hermione got up early and took a shower. She felt so much better. She dressed into her school robes and curled her hair again, this time placing a permanent charm to it.

She left her room and as she left, a girl that looked to be like she was only 6th year left Draco's room.

She took one look at Hermione and rushed out.

The Devil himself appeared shortly after her. (The devil in Hermione's opinion anyway.)

Draco Malfoy appeared at the doorway of his room in nothing but his boxers.

"Well, it seems you feel better."

"Who was that?" she asked disregarding his question.

"Dunno. Don't really care though."

"You don't even know her and you slept with her?" she asked.

"Well, that's for me to know and you to find out."

"But it seemed like she really likes you! Even love!" she said shrilly. Sure, she wasn't worthy for Love but everyone else sure was.

"Love? Ha! There is no such thing as love. The feeling you call 'Love' is just a strong emphasis on infatuation! Love is nothing!" he laughed.

"What are you taking about? Stop talking nonsense! Don't use your brain to think about love, use your heart you prat." She knew she sounded so preppy and cheesy but she had to keep appearances up. Besides, she had to stick up for those too stupid to do it for themselves. Like Pansy Parkinson.

"Well, my dear, the brain controls all of our body parts and organs and muscles etc right?" he asked.

"Well, yes."

"And is the heart a muscle and part of our body?"

"Well… yes. But!"

"So technically, the brain controls the heart so why listen to the heart or what I would like to call second in command, when you would be listening to your brain anyway?"

"But…"

"Tongue-tied Ms. Potter? I guess you don't know as much as you think you know." He said and disappeared behind double doors.

'I hate him!' she thought crossing her arms in front of her chest.

She was about to get back in her room but as she walked towards it, a bright light was seen from the cracks of her doors. She was a little alarmed but decided to ignore it and went to breakfast instead.

She went in to her first class after reassuring Harry and Ron a million times that she was alright just had a little fever the other day.

She entered the transfiguration room and sat herself down in the middle.

She opened her text book and began reading. If she wanted to keep up this charade she would have to still be ahead of the class.

She completed all her classes and found out they didn't get too far. She was relieved since she didn't want Harry and Ron suspicious.

It seemed that everywhere she turned she saw Malfoy.

In all her classes, in the hallways, at the great hall, heck! Even the girls in the toilets kept talking about him! It was like she was plagued with his curse!

While she was washing her hands she heard a couple of 6th year Ravenclaws enter the bathroom.

"He is so hot!" a girl with dirty-blonde hair said.

"I know! Draco Malfoy is to die for!" said the other with pitch black hair.

"Do you know, I heard he shares a common room with Hermione Potter! You know, Harry Potter's twin?"

"Really? Merlin! I would love to be her!"

It seemed that they didn't know what Hermione Potter looked like because they didn't stop the conversation even after they saw her.

'So that's how they see me now. Not 'bookworm' or 'third of golden trio' anymore. Now I'm Harry Potter's twin. Great. Just great. Well, not as if I'll live up to be anything else.' She thought as she left the toilets.

As she was walking through the corridors, she spotted something she would rather not witness. Draco was making out with Pansy.

Draco didn't know why he even bothered. He hated Pansy. But she was just a booty call. She was only too enthusiastic about it. He kissed her furiously and she kissed with just as much force.

'It feels like I'm kissing a fish!' he thought.

He stopped the kiss and straightened himself up. He then walked away leaving Pansy. He didn't notice Hermione at all.

Hermione just stared.

Pansy even said,

"I love you Draco!" after they made out and he just kept walking as if it was nothing!

He was so… so… anti-love!

Sure, she feels like she's hurt for no reason but at least she doesn't play around with peoples feelings like he does! It hurt all the people he played with but does he care? No! He was the cruelest, meanest, cold-hearted, most selfish prick she had ever known!

The weird part of it was that she felt like she was being a hypocrite. There she was insulting Malfoy when she herself was feeling like Love never existed. But then, she knew Harry loved her. And so did her parents. And Ron. She was being so unfair. There they were. The people who loves her. There were all around and there she was. Thinking their Love never existed.

She felt like she was ungrateful when in truth it was the only thing keeping her sane for the past few years. The thought that when she disappeared or got hurt, there would always be someone to notice was the only thing keeping her alive. She knew she wasn't worthy. She knew she didn't treasure it as much as she should but she did know, that she could never return those feelings. And it hurt her.

She knew she couldn't love Harry as much as he loved her. She couldn't love the Weasleys as much as they did. She knew she couldn't love her own parents, both adoptive and biological, as much as they cared for her. And she felt so sorry for them that they kept giving up their time and Love to a person like her. A person like her that was hidden in shadows. Hidden in her brothers' fame. Hidden in her best friends light. Hidden in the dark.

She hated herself so much. But the only way she could think of by paying them back was that she would keep up her charade. If only she knew how hurt and broken this was making her.